12. Cecil

Chapter 12

Iheard the door open behind me but didn't bother to look. It could only be Warwick. Nobody else even knew we were in the house yet. It was still the middle of the afternoon, and everyone around here was still at work. Not only that, but we only had one neighbor, and I'd been told they both worked for the council.

When Warwick moved to sit next to me, I glanced up at him. I had long since stopped crying. I'd had my cry, and that was that. I was trying to figure out how I was going to get through life with what I'd been given. I'd always told myself that they were parents, and mine sucked, but my mate would be different—better.

"Did you have a good run?" Warwick asked.

I grinned. "I didn't go," I told him as I sighed. "I probably should have, but I just decided to sit here, and then I started thinking about things."

Warwick was quiet for a long moment. "About what? Care to share?"

I glanced at my mate. "Just life in general, I guess. I try really hard not to let it get me down too much. I know I'm incredibly fortunate in some regards, but in others, I can't help but wonder and question why."

Warwick stared at me before slowly nodding. He went quiet again, and after a while, I looked back out at the trees. They were swaying gently in the breeze. It was still early October here, and the weather had already cooled somewhat, but summer seemed to want to hold on a little longer. That probably meant we'd be buried in snow soon enough. I scoffed at the thought. That was usually how it worked.

"Did you get whatever it was you needed to talk to your packmate about taken care of?"

Warwick sighed. "Yes and no. I didn't talk to Atticus. I did seek out Alpha Sergei though."

I looked back at my mate. "Things taken care of?"

Warwick shrugged before he shook his head. "I needed advice."

I nodded. I understood that. I was going to have to go talk to Grandfather and Grandpa in a few hours. Maybe they could offer me some advice.

"I needed to know how to romance you," Warwick said. I tilted my head.

Surely I heard him wrong. "What?"

"I asked for advice on how to not mess things up with you. Atticus and Damien just told me to have sex with you and claim you. I know that we'll get there when we're ready, but I know there's more to it than that. I thought Alpha Sergei would be a good place to ask for advice."

I scratched my head before turning a little to angle my body toward my mate. "You're telling me that you went to the created dragon to ask about having sex with me?" Warwick scowled.

"No. I went to ask about how to romance you. I ended up leaving with Alpha mate Chin, and we ended up talking to Alpha mate Lev."

My eyes widened. "You talked to Grandpa about having sex with me?" Please no. I absolutely didn't want to hear what I thought I'd just heard.

"Again, no. We were talking about romance. Romantic gestures. I asked what were some things you liked. What I could do to make you smile."

He did? "You did?"

Warwick nodded. He reached out and ran his finger down the side of my face. I closed my eyes at the sensation and took a deep breath. My bear loved that our mate was finally touching us.

"I did. I've never been in love before, nor have I been in a relationship. I know that you deserve better than me for your mate, Cecil. But I hope to be able to figure out how to make it up to you."

I opened my eyes. "Why do you say that? That I deserve better? Why do you put yourself down like you do?"

"I have spent a long time being avoided because of who I am and how I look. I don't want that stigma attached to you. It's unfair since you did nothing to warrant such treatment."

I felt bad for Warwick. He truly was kind if you got to know him. "I'm not worried about people not talking to me, Warwick. I'm honored to be your mate." I thought about earlier this morning and smiled. "Just yours. Did you know that I first thought that your packmates were giving me advice about being shared with your pack?"

"What?" Warwick scowled.

I chuckled again. "Yeah. It was quickly sorted, but I misunderstood. They were trying to help because they said you didn't really have a way with words and would step on my feelings."

Warwick looked out at the trees when the breeze suddenly picked up. "I don't talk much. But I'm not asked a whole lot of questions for the most part. I do my job, and I'm good at it, I'd like to think. But outside of work, I don't do a whole lot."

"What do you like to do?" I was curious to get to know my mate a little more.

Warwick shrugged. "I go to work, go out on assignments, and that's about it. We have pack runs several times a week if needed, but other than that, I don't have a life. I never have."

I wondered if that was because of who he was or how he was treated. "Can you tell me about it?"

Warwick looked at me. "About what?"

"About your realm. What was it like?"

Warwick was quiet for several minutes. I thought I might have overstepped until he finally started talking. "There isn't a whole lot to know, really. It's dreary but in a dark and sinister way. My master was cruel. He used us for his games. We killed or were killed. Those we thought were our packmates could and would turn on us in a blink. We would do the same to them."

Warwick went quiet again. I took a chance and touched his arm where the sleeve of his long-sleeve shirt was rolled up. His skin was hairy and quite warm. Both were things expected of most alphas.

"Do you know why you were sent here?" It wouldn't change my feelings that were starting to develop for my mate, but I couldn't help but be curious.

"I fought back. Something in me snapped. Well, in my beast. I've always been incredibly large and dominant, and I'd been one of his favorites for a long time. My beast loved that we made our master so happy. When he got tired of others that I'd considered some of my closest packmates, he ordered me to kill them." Warwick looked at me, his eyes blank. "My beast wouldn't do it, and when he whipped me, I fought back. My punishment was to be chained and ordered to watch when he tortured and killed every one of them."

How could anyone be so utterly evil? I ran my hand up and down Warwick's exposed arm, hoping to offer even a little support. I regretted asking and wouldn't ever ask about his realm ever again.

"How did you get out?" Because he had. He was here.

Warwick looked at me, shaking his head. "I honestly don't recall. I don't have any memories of being banished. I was chained one moment, and the next, I woke up in the middle of a jungle in my beast form."

"I'm sorry, Warwick. I shouldn't have asked." Warwick looked confused. "That was horrible, and I asked you to relive it."

Warwick sighed. "I came to terms with it a long time ago. We've lived through that and worse. All of us. Even Ansel."

Who was Ansel? "I don't know who Ansel is." The wind picked up again, and the breeze cooled considerably. When I looked up to the sky, I noticed that heavy clouds had moved in recently. It looked and felt like we were going to get rained on soon. I stood and held out my hand. "Care to continue talking inside? I think it's going to rain soon."

Warwick looked skyward before he took my hand and stood. He loomed over me, but that couldn't be helped. He was so much taller than I was.

"Ansel is Atticus and Brice's adopted son. He's a hellhound like the rest of the pack, and we found him when we went on assignment from the goddess."

I knew there was a complete story there, but I was a bit hesitant to ask. "Is Ansel a child?" I asked. He'd said he was their adopted son. That implied he was young.

"No. Well, the best we can guess is he's a teenager. Probably around sixteen?" Warwick opened the door for me. I stepped in, and he followed. "He might be a bit younger, we're not sure. Just like we don't really know how old any of us are. In our realm, there is no concept of time. We live for his evil pleasure, and we don't know how long any of us have been around."

I couldn't imagine living such a life. It was a wonder that any of them were able to go about their daily lives.

I walked over to the large black leather couch that obviously belonged to Warwick. It wasn't mine, so that left my mate. I sat, and when Warwick sat beside me instead of at the other end, I looked at my lap to hide my smile. He could have sat at the other end of the couch but chose to sit close to me.

"You're saying you don't know how old you are?"

Warwick shook his head. "I'm old. I know that. I've been here for several centuries. I was probably two or three hundred years old before I woke up here. I honestly don't know though."

Old. My mate was old. Older-than-my-parents old. "I'm ninety-six. And I thought I was old."

Warwick chuckled. "Not compared to me. But does it matter, really? We're all going to keep on living now, so we have a long time to be together."

That was true. "Did you really talk to Grandpa Lev?"

Warwick nodded. "I did. He told me you like cookies and you are fond of family. Well, the family you have here. You enjoy your time with them."

That was true. "I do."

"I want to make this work, Cecil."

I looked up at Warwick. "So do I."

"Good." Warwick went quiet. I didn't know what he was thinking, which was frustrating.

"What's your favorite food?" I asked suddenly.

Warwick shrugged. "Steak? Maybe. I've not thought about a favorite. I like all foods."

"Cookies?"

Warwick nodded. "Yes, I like cookies. I've been told you are fond of them too. Did you want me to get you cookies?"

I deflated thinking about the cookies I left behind last evening. I'd been looking forward to them too. And after everything happened, I didn't make another batch.

"I like cookies. Double chocolate chip are my favorite. But cookies are cookies. I'll eat them all."

Warwick nodded slowly before he held out his hand. In it was a plate that was piled high with cookies. My eyes widened.

"You didn't eat much lunch. I upset you in some way."

I took a cookie before I looked back down at my lap.

"I know I did. I don't want to cause you to be sad. I like your smile. So does my beast. He was really upset with me because we'd upset you so much you stopped eating your lunch." Warwick looked toward the kitchen. "Did you by chance end up finishing your food?"

I took a bite of my cookie and closed my eyes. It was perfect. How did he do that? I understood he used magic. But did he bake them? How did it work exactly?

"Cecil?"

I opened my eyes to find another cookie being held out. I opened my mouth and took a bite. It was just as delicious.

"I didn't eat," I told him after I finished chewing.

"Would you like to? I want you to eat enough. If we're going to go for a run, you'll need your energy."

He was right; I would. Not that my bear would run out of energy. He was smaller than other polar bears around, but he wasn't that weak.

"I'll eat. But I was really enjoying talking to you. Unless you really need to go for a run, I'd rather stay in and talk some more."

Not that being with Warwick in our shifted forms wouldn't be amazing. But I already knew it would be even more so once we'd claimed each other. Then, we would be able to communicate with one another.

"We can talk. I'll keep feeding you cookies if you'd like. Or I could reheat your food, and you could eat that, and then we could get back to cookies."

I smiled. He was trying, and I recognized that. Warwick looked as if he was going to smile, only he seemed to stop at the last moment.

"Do you ever smile?" I asked.

"I've tried. It's not pretty, according to Ramsey."

I really didn't like all of these people I was hearing about. They seemed to be mean to my mate, which didn't make sense at all. Warwick was so sweet. He'd gone to my grandpa to ask for help to romance me. He made me cookies. He'd offered to reheat my food for me. He was being so sweet. Why were people mean to him?

"I'd love to eat my lunch now. I know it's midafternoon, but I'm really hungry now that I'm eating cookies." Not that my stomach was going to complain about a few more cookies. It certainly wasn't. But even with me being a shifter, I needed to eat something other than cookies and the few bites of lo mein that I'd had earlier.

"Be back in just a minute." Warwick handed me the plate of cookies. After I took it, he stood and walked off toward the kitchen area. I couldn't help but stare. He was incredibly tall. His hair was wild and just below his shoulders. I wondered what it would feel like. Was it soft? Did he like it to be touched? Maybe not. Would he let me touch his hair? Did he ever tie it back? What would he look like without his beard?

My thoughts were running wild in my mind when Warwick suddenly returned. He had another plate, this one piled high with my lunch that I'd not eaten. In the other hand, he was holding a cup.

"I should go to the table."

Warwick shook his head. Seconds later, there was a portable table in front of me. "Now you don't have to. You can eat, and we can continue talking." He set the food down on the tray, and my stomach chose that moment to growl loudly. It was protesting, I knew, but I'd eaten three cookies. Did it have to grumble so much?

"Thank you," I said. I smiled up at Warwick, who looked down at me. I saw a bit of a smile, maybe, and I was going to take it. I needed to figure out how to get him to smile at me. And if I ever came across whoever Ramsey was, I was going to give him a piece of my mind. My mate was kind and sweet. He shouldn't have said anything about him smiling. Now, I had to work really hard to get him to give me something that should be easy. No matter. I was determined to win Warwick's smiles. They would be more than worth it if and when I ever got one.

"You're welcome." Warwick sat, and I handed the plate of cookies back to him. He placed them on the other cushion of the couch before he angled his body toward me. "What would you like to continue talking about?"

There were so many things. I wanted to know everything I could about Warwick and hellhounds, but I had a feeling that learning about hellhounds in general probably wasn't a pretty thing.

"Do you like being an enforcer?" That was a safe question, wasn't it?

"I do. It gives me a sense of purpose. My beast is happy to help others who need it."

I took a bite of lo mein just then and could only nod. That was good.

"When I was in Venice, I happened across the coven there. Well, one of its members. He tried to warn me about his coven and the master. It was discovered that they might also be in some sort of trafficking ring. If nothing else, they're selling drugs and guns."

I sighed. "Why do people have to be so shitty?" I tried to remember that despite my parents being toxic and abusive, they could have been worse. They hadn't ever sold me, so there was that.

"I'm not sure. I'm not exactly a nice person, Cecil. I've done some truly horrible things."

I hadn't thought about it that way. I set my fork down for a moment. Warwick noticed and scowled. Immediately, I picked it back up, and the scowl left his face.

"You didn't do them because you wanted to though." Warwick looked like he was going to argue. I reached out and touched his arm. He looked at my hand on his arm before his eyes met mine. "You didn't, Warwick. You were forced to do those things by your master. That's different than someone choosing to kidnap another person and sell them into a situation that they know will be abusive. There is a difference." I wasn't sure that Warwick would see it that way, but I hoped so.

I forked another bite of food and waited.

"You might be right. I did things that are and were horrendous though. And I'm fairly certain I could and would be capable of doing them again if I needed to."

I swallowed before I slowly nodded. I was certain any of us could do things we wouldn't normally, given the right circumstances. I forked another bite of food because I wasn't sure how to move past where our conversation had gone. Luck was on my side when Warwick changed the subject and asked me about my job and if I enjoyed working with Dr. King at the omega clinic.