Chapter 9

“Did you see the project Mr. Westyn’s class is doing? My son is having the best time!”

“My niece is in his class, and my sister can’t stop gushing over the creative way he’s teaching! That skiing theme is just fantastic!”

“I can’t even imagine what he’ll come up with once the winter really hits around here! Do you think we can convince the school to let him take the kids on a field trip up to the lodge for lessons?”

Chloe quietly sighed as she sat in the corner of Books Beans and read over her lesson plan for the next day. It had been a week since she and Tanner had their weekend getaway, and while she was deliriously happy, hearing things like the conversation happening at the next table had her feeling a little…

Jealous.

And she was ashamed to even think like that.

“It’s so wonderful to see these new teachers thriving! I’ll admit I was a little worried about so many new classes starting this year and so many new teachers coming in, but Mr. Westyn is like a breath of fresh air! Such energy!”

Okay, that one hurt a little. Chloe knew she wasn’t the most exciting person, but she loved teaching and adored her students. She felt like she created a very nurturing environment for them.

But obviously not as fresh and fun or as creative as Tanner’s.

Ugh…

She should be happy for him and the students. Heck, she should be thrilled! But right now, it felt forced. Teaching was the one area she had stood out. After living in the shadow of her siblings, teaching at Sweetbriar Elementary had been a way that she made a name for herself. Winning the Teacher of the Year award two years in a row had filled her with pride and given her a confidence she’d lacked for most of her life.

And that was all over now.

Beside her, one of the women gently pushed her chair back and banged right into Chloe’s.

“Oh! Miss Donovan, hey,” she said sheepishly. “I didn’t see you there. Sorry!”

Obviously…

The other two women gave her a sympathetic smile before they all got up to leave, making her feel like they were suddenly aware of how their conversation might have sounded insulting to her.

Or, at the very least, a little insensitive.

Once they were gone, she let out a long—and somewhat loud—sigh. Every day she and Tanner talked about what they did in their classes, and she had been rambling on for weeks sharing her ideas with him and…it seemed like he wasn’t really doing any of the things she was suggesting.

Things he told her he was doing.

Wait…has he been lying to me?

Now that the idea was out there, it took hold—hard. There was only one thing she could do. Standing, she quickly packed up her stuff and ran out to her car. She needed some answers, and she needed them now before this whole thing festered and made her do something crazy.

Her driving may have been a little erratic, but fortunately, she didn’t have to go far. And in no time, she was parked and storming up to the door, yanking it open, and…

“Welcome to Color Me Crazy! What’s up, Chloe?” Heather, the front desk receptionist, said with a big smile.

“Is Ash here? I need to talk to her.”

“Your timing’s perfect; she just finished with a client and is back in her office.”

“Thanks.” Clutching the strap of her purse, she walked with purpose toward the back corner of the salon. Fortunately, Ash’s door was open and when she looked up, she smiled.

“Hey! This is a surprise! You should have called and told me you were stopping by. I was really jonesing for a cake pop. Billie offered one to me earlier and I turned her down, and I’ve been cursing myself all day for it.”

Stepping into the office, Chloe shut the door and leaned against it. “Tanner’s been lying to me,” she blurted out before she could even think about it.

“What?” her sister cried in disbelief, instantly on her feet. “The bastard! Where is he? Do you need me to go with you and kick his ass? Should I call Reid?”

Okay, this was the brief reality check she needed to calm down. “No, you don’t have to call Reid, and you’re not kicking his ass.” Pausing for a moment, she asked, “Why is that always your immediate reaction? How many asses have you actually kicked? Because I don’t remember you ever…”

“It’s a figure of speech, Chlo. Sheesh. Now sit down and tell me what’s going on. What did he do?”

Taking the only other chair in the office, she sat and sighed and then launched into the conversation she heard at the coffee shop.

“Um…”

“And it’s not the only time it’s happened. Sometimes when I walk the kids out for carpool, I hear the parents talking. People are seriously gushing over him. Gushing, Ashlynn!”

“I get that, but…”

“And in all the gushing, they’re talking about projects and lessons that he’s doing that he doesn’t tell me about! So every day when we talk about lesson plans and…and…”

“Projects?”

“Yes! Projects! Every day when we talk, he never mentions the stuff he’s doing. So I go on and on and on about things I think he can do or things I’ve done in the past and he’s always so supportive and telling me it all sounds great, but then he doesn’t do any of them! Why would he lie to me?”

Her sister blinked at her for several moments before she spoke. “Let me get this straight…you’re upset because he’s making his class his own and not doing what you tell him to do. Do I have that right?”

“Well, when you say it like that, I sound like I’m being petty and childish,” Chloe murmured.

“Because you are being petty and childish,” Ashlynn said with a frown. “That’s not like you. What in the world, Chloe? So Tanner’s doing his own thing and doing it well? You should be happy for him! As your boyfriend, I would think you’d be all proud of him and stuff.”

How was she supposed to explain this?

“I am proud of him,” she argued, “but I just wish he’d be honest with me, so I don’t feel like such a loser when I listen to people talk about him!”

“Wait…now you feel like a loser?” Leaning back in her chair, Ashlynn shook her head. “I think we need to back up here a bit. And maybe order some Chinese food and go to my place to talk. Reid’s working the overnight shift, so he won’t disturb us.” She picked up her phone. “Should I call Billie and Jade? Maybe MacKenzie too?”

“What? No! No!” Groaning, she jumped up. “Why would I want even more people to know I’m acting like a crazy person? Just hearing you imply it is enough to make me want to cry!”

And then—dammit—her eyes stung and tears were streaming down her face.

“Oh, Chlo…come on. Don’t do that!” Ashlynn immediately stood up and hugged her.

“Why am I being like this?” she murmured. “I shouldn’t feel threatened, right? It’s not like Sweetbriar is suddenly going to go backwards and only need one kindergarten teacher again and they’ll pick Tanner over me.”

Pulling back, she gasped.

“What if they choose Tanner over me?” And now she was crying in earnest.

“Okay, okay…hang on one minute. Sit down and let me just make sure my schedule’s clear. I’ll be right back.” Then she dashed out of the office, shutting the door behind her.

“Probably making sure no one sees her crazy sister,” Chloe mumbled, wiping away the tears. Her phone dinged with an incoming text and she stupidly reached for it.

Tanner: Hey, Beautiful! I was just at the coffee shop and heard I just missed you.

Tanner: I have to do a little shopping. What do you say to dinner at my place?

Groaning, she contemplated telling him exactly what she thought of his offer of dinner, but then realized she wasn’t thinking clearly.

Chloe: Thanks, but I ran into Ash and we’re having dinner together.

Chloe: I’ll see you at school tomorrow.

There. No heart emojis or smiley faces, just words.

Right, like that’s going to prove anything.

Tanner: Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?

Okay, maybe that did prove something.

Chloe: Why would you even ask that?

Ugh…why did I pick up the phone?

Tanner: Because you’re being a little short with me and I can tell.

Tanner: Can I call you so we can talk?

Chloe: Everything’s fine, Tanner.

Liar, liar, liar!

Chloe: I’m sitting here with Ash and everything’s good.

Chloe: I’ll see you in the morning, okay?

Chloe: Have a good night.

Then she tossed her phone back in her purse as if it had burned her.

Just then, Ashlynn walked back in and shut the door behind her again. “Okay, my schedule is clear and you and I are going to my place for some Chinese food and ice cream sundaes for dessert. I already called in the dinner order, and my freezer is full of ice cream and the pantry is full of toppings.” She paused and grinned. “And the toppings aren’t always just for sundaes,” she said with a dramatic wink. “Now come on. Follow me home.”

Thirty minutes later, they were sitting in Ashlynn’s dining room with way too much Chinese takeout in front of them, but it was perfect.

“You don’t get it,” she explained.

Again.

“Things always came easier for you with whatever you tried. Teaching is the first thing that I really excelled at. And now all everyone can talk about is how awesome Tanner is and I’m going to be forgotten. Just like I was the forgotten Donovan for most of my life.”

Ash rolled her eyes. “Okay, no one ever forgot you.”

“Mom left me at the mall that time…”

“Okay, one time!” her sister cried. “You were hiding in Santa’s gingerbread house! And, in her defense, she left to find a police officer because she thought you’d been abducted!”

“This is getting us nowhere! This is how I feel, Ashlynn! You don’t get to tell me how to feel or not feel! I’m sitting here telling you how I’ve felt invisible for most of my life! Being a teacher bolstered my confidence like nothing else and you know what, I feel threatened by Tanner’s showiness and success! There! Happy?”

Letting out a small huff, Ash tossed down her chopsticks. “Actually, yes. I love that you finally spoke up! I hate that you’re feeling like this, but, like you said, I can’t tell you how to feel. If you feel threatened, then that’s how you feel. But what is it you want to happen here? Do you want Tanner to quit? To suddenly be a terrible teacher? I mean…think about it.”

Rather than answer, she picked up a dumpling and bit it in half, thinking as she chewed.

What did she want to happen?

“It seems to me like you have two things going on here, and they both have to do with Tanner, and neither of them is good.”

She nodded.

“You’re upset that he’s not being open with you about what he’s doing in his classroom—and I think that’s a really weird thing for him to keep to himself—and the fact that you’re afraid of him taking away your place at the school.”

Swallowing, she nodded again.

“We all like to be praised for the work we do. That was something that used to drive me crazy when I worked for Becky. But sometimes…we’re not the best and that’s okay. If we’re trying our best and getting results, that’s a win, Chlo. Your students love you. The parents love you. There are dozens of families in this town who have these great memories of the things you taught them. It’s okay to share the spotlight.”

“Maybe.”

“Would you feel like this if that other woman had taken the position? The one who Tanner replaced? Would you feel as threatened then, or is this because he’s your boyfriend?”

She groaned. “I knew getting involved with a coworker was going to be a bad thing.”

Reaching over, Ashlynn took her hands and gave them a squeeze. “It doesn’t have to be. You need to talk to Tanner and…”

Chloe snatched her hands back. “And say what? Stop being awesome? Stop being charming and successful? That would be the worst!”

With a patient smile, Ash took a moment to take a bite of her dinner before replying. “Or…you could just tell him you wish he would be honest with you about what he’s doing in his classroom. That it’s okay if he doesn’t do things your way or take your suggestions. Hell, Chloe, you had to figure it all out on your own and you were fine. It’s not a bad thing that Tanner’s just trying to do the same.”

Sadly, everything her sister was saying was right.

It took her a few moments, but she reluctantly agreed. “How do I stop feeling what I’m feeling? I’m going to ruin this relationship before it even has a chance if I don’t do something.”

“I know you’re not big on confrontation, but…you need to talk to him. It doesn’t need to be an argument or anything dramatic, just a conversation where you tell him how you feel.”

She snorted. “He’ll think I’m a horrible person and break up with me.”

“Then you know what? He’s not the person you thought he was. Or…maybe he’s the person you originally thought he was—the icky jerk.” She laughed softly. “Either way, this is something that has the potential to strengthen your relationship.”

“I don’t see how…”

“True colors, Chlo. You’re showing him your vulnerable side and hopefully he’s going to show you he’s…you know…not a jerk. Maybe he’ll show you he’s just as insecure as you are and maybe you need to take some of your…ahem…teaching advice, and keep it to yourself. Or at least wait for him to ask for it.”

“Ugh…” she whined. “Why are you always right?”

Preening from the praise, Ashlynn hummed happily. “As much as I’d like to say it comes naturally, it doesn’t. I’ve just had to do a bit of groveling and learning how to open myself up a lot with Reid. Sometimes it sucks and it’s awkward and uncomfortable, but the results are worth it.” She stood and took her plate to the sink. “Do you think you’ll call him when you get home later or wait until after school tomorrow to talk about this?”

“Probably tomorrow so I can think about what I’m going to say that will make me sound a little less pathetic.”

“Not pathetic,” her sister corrected. “Human.”

“Fine, human. Whatever.”

Nodding, Ashlynn went to the freezer and pulled out a gallon of cookies and cream. “And to reward you for your bravery—though it’s yet to be seen—we will celebrate with ice cream sundaes!”

It may have been a crappy afternoon, but it was turning into a really good night.

It wasn’t like him to feel so out of sorts, but that’s exactly how he felt.

Ever since Chloe hadn’t responded to his last text, he’d been certain she was upset with him over something. But what? Last he checked, they were fine. When she left school for the day, she said she’d see him later. Sure, it was that generic kind of statement and they didn’t make any plans, but…everything about her texts seemed off.

Chloe: I’m sitting here with Ash and everything’s good.

Chloe: I’ll see you in the morning, okay?

Chloe: Have a good night.

Tanner: Can I call you later?

But she’d never even responded or read that last text.

What the hell did I do?

At lunch, they’d talked about starting plans for the winter program and some potential holiday projects, and then she shared her selection of books she liked to read with the class this time of year. It was nothing out of the ordinary, and he’d appreciated her suggestions, but he didn’t commit to any of them.

Was that it? Was that the problem? She felt like he wasn’t contributing?

Hmm…

It was a little after nine and he wondered if she was home from dinner with her sister. He hated to let this wait until tomorrow because once they were at work, there really wasn’t time to talk. And if there was one thing he hated, it was going to sleep when he was mad. He had a feeling she felt the same way. So if she was mad at him, he didn’t want that to drag on until the morning.

With his mind made up, Tanner grabbed his keys before he could change his mind and walked out to his car. If she wasn’t home, all he’d done was waste five minutes or less of driving.

But he seriously hoped she was home.

Her car was in the driveway and the lights were on, so he knew she was home and awake. He parked and walked up to her door and rang the bell, letting out a long breath as he did. His heart was racing and he couldn’t believe he was nervous. When was the last time he’d ever felt this nervous?

“Tanner?” Chloe said, her confusion obvious as she opened the door. She was wearing a pair of flannel pajama pants, a t-shirt, a robe, and her hair was up in a ponytail. There wasn’t even a hint of makeup on her face, and she looked utterly adorable.

Probably not the time to mention that…

“Hey,” he said, sounding way too breathless for a guy standing still. “You never responded to my last text, and I can’t shake the feeling that you’re mad at me. There was no way I was going to sleep without trying to make things right.” That was the fastest he’d ever spoken, and he felt mildly foolish, but this was just too important to wait.

Leaning against the front door, she bit her bottom lip. “I thought we would just talk tomorrow…”

“Then there is something wrong,” he concluded, his shoulders sagging.

“I didn’t say that.”

“You didn’t have to.” Taking a step toward her, he fought the urge to reach out and touch her. “Chloe, we spend hours every day talking to each other, and I don’t want that to stop now. If there’s something I’ve done…”

“Tomorrow would really be…”

“I know that I come across as this confident guy with a colossal ego,” he quickly interrupted. “You’ve told me that yourself. You gave me the chance to prove that I’m not really that guy and I’d like to think that I’ve showed you the true person I am. But that doesn’t mean I’m perfect or won’t screw up.” Raking a hand through his hair, he let out his breath. “Sometimes I get so caught up in myself that I might not pay attention to things other people might find important, so if I did that, I’m sorry. Is this because I’m not contributing anything to the lesson plans? Because I have some ideas, but it seemed like you had everything down to a science and I didn’t want to step on your toes.”

That had her standing up a little straighter, and he knew he’d touched a nerve.

“Is it that you didn’t want to step on my toes, or do you just have a secret plan that you don’t want to share so you can be the superstar at Sweetbriar Elementary?” she demanded, stepping out onto the porch. “Because it seems to me like you’ve got all kinds of super cute, super fun projects and activities going on in your classroom that have all the parents going gaga over you, and you never once mentioned any of them to me!” Her eyes went wide and she went to turn and go back into the house. “Just…go home, Tanner. We’ll talk tomorrow.”

“Oh, hell no,” he murmured, slapping his hand on the door before she could shut it in his face. “Are you seriously telling me you’re upset because I didn’t share my lesson plans with you?”

All she did was glare at him.

With his free hand, he pinched the bridge of his nose. “Chloe, can we please go inside and talk about this? I’m honestly confused as hell right now.”

“Fine,” she mumbled, stomping away from the door.

Tanner followed her to the kitchen, where she sat down with a mug that looked like it had hot tea in it, but she didn’t offer him any.

Fine. Whatever.

Taking a seat, he asked, “Can you please explain this to me? I don’t see what I did wrong.”

“Figures.”

And yeah, the sarcasm was a bit heavy before she seemed to just…deflate.

“Oh God, I’m sorry,” she said, her voice trembling. “It’s not you. It’s me. All I’ve been hearing this week is about how awesome you are and all these great things you’re doing with the students, and I don’t understand why you don’t tell me about any of it. All the times I go on about ideas for you, I realize now I was just making an idiot of myself!”

Ah…okay. Now he got it.

“Now I feel like I owe you an apology,” he began carefully. “You’ve always offered to help and give me advice since the day we met and…it’s kind of a weird thing for me. And not just with you. I was the same when I was skiing. It didn’t matter how much more experience the other guys had; I didn’t really listen.” He shrugged and gave her a small smile. “Looking back, some of it I should have, but I was stubborn. Apparently, I still am.”

“Oh.”

He took a moment to think about what he was about to say. “When my brother died, my parents got a little…overbearing. With good reason,” he quickly amended, “but there was a lot of comparing things my brother did with the things I was doing. After getting checked out by dozens of doctors and confirming that I was healthy, I resented the comparisons or the suggestions that were based on what my brother did or didn’t do. That’s where it all started and believe me, it makes me feel like a major jerk that I react that way.”

Beside him, Chloe sighed softly. “One of the things I love about teaching is it’s something my siblings have no part of. For once in my life, no one was comparing me to my confident and outgoing twin, or my super smart older sister, or athletic and popular older brother. This was my space, and I excelled at it. And it felt good.”

Until he showed up.

Dammit.

“Okay, but…we all have our things, Chloe. And I’m sorry if my teaching style is upsetting to you, but…it’s not fair of you to ask me to change it,” he said carefully. “At the end of the day, this is my job and my reputation too, and I don’t think I could teach the same way that you do, because it wouldn’t feel natural. Just like you couldn’t do it the way I am because that’s not how you are.”

She nodded. “I know, and believe me, I’m not proud of this. That’s why I went to Ash’s tonight. I needed to sit and talk this out because it was making me crazy.” Then she glanced over at him. “And that’s why I didn’t want to talk until tomorrow, because I was still trying to work it all out.”

Now it was his turn to nod. “So…what happens now?”

“It’s my issue, Tanner, and I’m going to get over it. Teaching at Sweetbriar has been my only job, so I’ve never had to deal with this kind of situation before. And if it wasn’t you in the room next door, it would be another teacher and potentially the same situation. I was living in a bubble, and you know…bubbles burst. I’m an adult and I’ll deal with it.” She stared down at her tea. “I just hope you can forgive me for being a brat.”

Reaching over, he took one of her hands in his. “There’s nothing to forgive. And I really didn’t mean to hurt you by not talking about my lesson plans. It just didn’t seem like that big of a deal to me. But if you want, we can compare binders moving forward and…”

“No,” she interrupted. “That’s unnecessary. There are going to be things that we have to work on together, but…there’s no reason for you to have to run anything by me. It’s not my place.”

“That’s not what I’m saying. Maybe I need to stop being so secretive and keeping things to myself because I fear someone’s going to find a weakness or…or…whatever. Skiing was an independent thing. I was a team of one. Perhaps it’s time for me to stop thinking like that.”

When her eyes met his, she smiled, and damn, did he love her smiles.

“Since I’m a twin, I’ve never been a team of one. I think that’s what took me the longest to adjust to when I started teaching. I was completely independent, and it felt a little disconcerting. That’s probably why I’m being so sensitive about this with you. With our…you know…relationship, I guess I felt like maybe we were a team. But then you were doing stuff that you didn’t even mention to me and…”

“And you felt alone.”

Another nod. “Exactly.”

Tanner breathed a sigh of relief because this was all great information for them to share with each other. He was really falling hard for Chloe and as much as he thought he knew a lot about her, it was fascinating to delve a little deeper.

Plus, knowing more about her meant that maybe he wouldn’t screw this up.

He gave her hand another squeeze before pushing away from the table and standing. “Thank you for being willing to talk to me about this. I’m not usually the kind of person who just shows up unannounced on someone’s doorstep late at night…”

“It wasn’t that late,” she gently corrected.

“Still, you asked for time and I didn’t give it to you. But in my defense, I was genuinely worried, and now I’m glad I took the chance and came over.”

She stood. “Me too.” Glancing around for a moment, she asked, “Would you like something to drink? I know I should have asked when you first sat down, but…”

“But you were mad,” he said with a grin. “And rightfully so.”

“It didn’t give me the right to be rude.”

“Chloe?”

“Hmm?”

“I don’t need anything to drink.” He moved closer and slowly wrapped his arms around her waist before placing a soft kiss on her forehead. “It’s a school night, so I’m going to go home because I know you prefer to be in bed by ten.” Another kiss. But when he went to release her, she held on tight. Resting his head on top of hers, he decided to simply enjoy holding her for a little longer.

“Tanner?”

“Hmm?”

“Do you have to go home?” she quietly asked, and he felt himself smiling.

“No, I do not,” he told her. “Everything’s locked up and I don’t believe there’s anything there that I need.” And yet another kiss. “I have everything I want and need right here.”

When he lifted his head, Chloe looked up at him and he saw the play of emotions on her face—the want, the need, the relief…

“Ask me to stay,” he said gruffly.

“Stay.”

Without a word, he scooped her up in his arms, strode out of the kitchen, and went straight to her bedroom. It wasn’t until he placed her on the bed that he smiled and said, “I like your jammies.”

She groaned even as she softly laughed. “They are the least sexy things ever. I should be mortified.”

But Tanner shook his head. “Whatever you’re wearing is sexy. You looked like an absolute fantasy when we stayed at the lodge. All that silk and lace made me forget how to breathe a time or two. But there is also something incredibly arousing about all this flannel that has me dying to know what you have on underneath.”

The impish grin she gave him said she couldn’t wait for him to find out.

With one knee on the bed, he slowly moved over her. “Are you going to tell me, or do I get to find out for myself?” Then he was kissing his way up her throat and along her jaw before settling in on her lips.

After that, it didn’t matter how he found out. All he knew was that he was exactly where he wanted to be and with the woman that was becoming everything to him.

Life was pretty damn good.