12. Everly

CHAPTER 12

EVERLY

" I like you with my brother," Camden said from beside me as the game raged in front of us. She'd called this a pitching duel. There weren't a lot of runs and she'd explained it meant that the pitchers were determining the game. Both pitchers were good and not allowing runs, so it'd come down to whoever screwed up first.

"I'm not with your brother."

She raised her eyebrow. Camden's hair was dark, like her brothers', though she had a lot of definition in the color that probably came from highlights, but it looked so natural on her. Her hazel eyes were beautiful in the sun and probably all the other time as well. But on the sides, the little starbursts of color around her pupils really shone brightly in the natural light.

"You're not?" She cocked her head to the side. "He's never wanted anyone else at his games that I know of."

That couldn't have been true. "I'm sure he's wanted people at his games."

"Oh, you're right. Let me rephrase that. There's never been another woman he's wanted at his game."

"High school?"

She shook her head. "Don't get me wrong. Lots of girls showed up for him in high school. Tons. But he never asked a single one to be there."

"Past girlfriends?" There had to have been someone.

"Nope. He had girlfriends here or there in high school, but he never cared if they came or not." She rolled her eyes. "They always came and then would get pissy that his attention was on the game and not on them exaggeratingly supporting him."

I snorted as I pictured that. "Why would they think the focus would be on them?"

She looked over at me with a wide grin. "And that's why I like you with my brother. You know shit about this game, but you know it's his life. You won't put pressure on him to choose between you and it."

"I wouldn't." At least she was right about that. "But again, we're friends. I'm not with him."

She narrowed her eyes to me. "Friends who have sex, right?" My lips parted in surprise because I couldn't believe she'd just said that. Camden held up a hand to stop whatever I was going to say. "Look, the last thing I want to do is think about any of my brothers having sex." She gagged, like she was going to throw up to drive her point home. "But the fact is you're sleeping with him, right?" I bit my lips together because I wasn't going to answer that. "Friends who have sex can very quickly turn into something else. For you and Urban, I like that."

There was nothing I could say to that because I'd thought the same thing. The only difference was that I'd shut those thoughts down. There couldn't be more for Urban and me. I'd been burned too many times and refused to be again. Somehow, I knew that with Urban, the burn would be so much worse.

Instead, I asked questions about the game. If I was going to be around this in any capacity, I should at least learn a thing or two .

Kalamazoo lost that game because the reliever had walked two in a row, and then someone hit a double, driving in runs in the ninth, and the Knights hadn't responded.

That was how Camden had put it. I'd take her word for it.

Once it was over, she and I took the tunnel that I was now becoming familiar with. It would lead us down to the clubhouse, where we'd wait for Urban to come out.

A pretty woman with auburn hair who looked to be about my age was coming in the other direction. She was wearing shorts, a Kalamazoo Knights T-shirt, and sandals. It took me a full minute to realize it was Amity, Silas' girlfriend that I'd met at the game I'd gone to.

"They're going to be in a great mood," she said when she came to a stop by us. We were standing in the middle of the tunnel—or hallway.

"No kidding," Camden told her, then she turned toward me. "So." Camden clapped her hands together, like she was about to drop a conspiracy theory on us or tell us something we weren't going to want to hear. "Have either of you thought about coming to the overnight at the stadium? "

It was a new thing that Camden had organized this year. It'd be a first. On Thursday night, the kids who'd signed up for baseball camp—even if it wasn't this round—were getting the chance to spend the night at the ballpark. They were going to be camping on the field and were all very excited about it.

"Well, since I work the baseball camp," I told her, "it's kind of part of my job." Though I could've opted out of it, I didn't want to disappoint the kids.

She turned to Amity. "What about you? It'll be fun. Harlowe's coming to help chaperone. I'll be there." She motioned her hand toward me. "Everly will be there and you two will get to hang out again as you should."

Amity raised an eyebrow out of curiosity, and I wished that Camden hadn't said that.

"Please come," she added. She folded her hands in front of her so Amity would know that she was begging.

"Fine, fine. I'll come. I'm not on this away trip, anyway."

Camden bounced up and down on her toes. "Thank you, thank you, thank you."

Amity's phone dinged. As she looked at it, she said, "The guys get back on Thursday, though there's no game, so when your brother is pissed that I'm here, I'm sending him to you."

"Pft. I can handle Silas." And I believed that she could.

"I have to go." Amity started to walk away then turned back.

I waved, then Camden began leading me away.

"You know, Urban should just get you your own pass. You know how to get down there."

"If you don't want—"

Camden held up her hand to stop me. "I don't have a problem with it. It'd just be more convenient for you."

"Aren't passes for family?"

"And girlfriends."

"I'm not his girlfriend."

She quickly raised her eyebrows but it was clear she didn't believe me. "Mmm."

I wasn't. And I'd keep telling myself that.

Camden disappeared once Urban had shown up. She said she had some other brothers to harass. Now it was time for dinner. He gave me his address and said to meet him there but I took as much time as humanly possible to get there.

We ordered in to eat at his apartment. It was my first time there and I didn't know what I was expecting, but it hadn't been this apartment.

It was large, which of course it would have been, but it was so clean. He had to have someone come in to do that, right? He opened the door wearing jeans and a dark-blue T-shirt that fit him very well. His hair was a bit messy, probably because he hadn't done much with it after he'd showered off after the game. He also wasn't wearing shoes, so when I stepped in, I kicked mine off as well.

I didn't wear outside shoes in my apartment, either.

"This place is huge," I told him as I came in. Dinner was waiting on the island in the kitchen area, which I could see, given the open concept.

"It's not mine," he said.

"What does that mean?"

"It's the team's. My mom put me here when I got traded. I'm still looking for my own place." Right, he'd only been back a short time. "It's rough. We don't have a lot of off time, as you know. I'm thinking about having Camden find me something. She knows what I like. You could help her."

I froze and didn't move any further into the apartment. But then, I forced my muscles to relax and pretended like he hadn't said what he'd just said. Helping find his apartment was too personal. Too much like what a girlfriend would do.

"If you're leaving at the end of the season, why more?" I asked as if his comment hadn't thrown me for a loop.

He shrugged. "I'd be more comfortable in my own place. I'm way too old for my mom to be choosing where I live. Plus, when I'm traded at the end of the year, I'll have some time before I have to report to spring training. I'll need somewhere to keep my shit while I look for a new place."

So either way he was leaving at the end of the season. Maybe he'd be back a little but he'd definitely be gone. That made him a safe bet. How could I get attached to someone I knew was leaving? I couldn't.

As he got our takeout from the bag, he grabbed plates. We'd ordered a bunch of Chinese and could make up our plates right there on the island.

"Your sister said today was a tough loss," I said as I watched him move around the kitchen.

"It was." He sighed. "Can't win them all, I guess." He stopped with his hands pressed against the countertop on the island. "Are you learning the game now that you've come to a few? "

I shrugged. "I guess a little. Like, I know three outs. Four balls, and you walk. Obviously, I know three strikes and you're out. But an older guy near us called can of corn when a player hit a ball and I have no idea what the hell that means."

He snorted then handed me a plate. "It's an old term. It comes from when women wore aprons all the time. She'd go to the store, right? Not be able to reach something."

"I'm familiar with that."

"Well, she'd use something else to knock it down—like a can of corn—and catch it easily in her apron. So if a guy pops up a ball and the player on the field doesn't even have to move to catch it, it's a can of corn."

I cocked my head to the side. "I guess that makes a little sense."

He chuckled, but then we made our plates and took them to the table. Again, I was going to ignore how normal this felt. Given that it seemed like we both wanted a friendship along with the sex, it shouldn't have been weird, but it absolutely was.

"You leave tomorrow, right?" I asked.

"Yeah. Short road trip. We've got a few in a row this month, but we come back Thursday. You busy? "

"Yeah, I have the camp overnight at the park on Thursday."

"That's right."

"I saw Amity today when Camden was bringing me down to the clubhouse. She's going to volunteer with us. Camden encouraged it."

Urban chuckled as if he knew exactly how his sister encourages things. It's not pushy but it is convincing. "Yeah? She's great. I can't believe Silas finally got her," he said. When I furrowed my brows, he added, "He's loved her since… Well, who the fuck knows when, but a long fucking time. But her brother was Silas's best friend, so…" So it was hands off. That was the unspoken rule. "Her brother died in a car accident when they were teenagers. Silas blamed himself for a long time and couldn't get out of his own way. Then Amity started working for the team and he couldn't keep himself away."

"That's kind of a sweet story. Minus her brother dying. I'm sorry to hear that." And I couldn't imagine if something happened to my brother since he was the only member of my family I was remotely close to. We weren't best friends, but we both saw the rest of them for what they were.

"Yeah. It was rough. We all played on the same team in school. He was a good guy."

To change the subject, I said, "Amity told us that you were all going to be in great moods because of the loss. Sarcastically, of course, but you don't seem to be all that upset."

He shrugged as he took a bite of noodles. "I'll work my frustration out on you in a bit."

Tiny prickles raced across my skin. "I look forward to it."

And boy, did he…

As I'd promised him the last time we'd been at my apartment, I left before he had a chance to throw me out. Not that he would've. He'd only said that because he didn't love that when the sex was over, he could go and I'd made that clear.

Deep down, I wanted to stay. For the first time in a long time, I wanted to be wrapped up in a man's arms, our naked bodies pressed together all night.

And that was exactly why I had to leave.

With him going on a road trip tomorrow, we'd get a little space.

Something I thought we needed, yet it was something I absolutely didn't want.

Though I wouldn't admit it to myself… I was totally screwed.