16. Tessa

“He what?!”

“Eric fell. He collided with another player and fell,” the Little League baseball coach explained. Her tone was very soothing.

Unfortunately for her, I had no chill. “Is he okay?!”

“He’s fine.” She remained calm. “He bruised his arm, and he’s got quite the scrape on his knee. Now he has tough kid points.”

I gritted my teeth. “I’m headed over there right now.”

“Eric says he wants to keep playing.”

“I’m still coming over.”

I ended the call, grabbed my keys, and bolted out the door.

A short eight minutes later, a little dust kicked up behind my car as I stopped in the parking area for baseball practice.

The coach, Martha, waited for me.

“I figured you’d be here pretty quickly, and you are. Eric’s father told me to let you know it’s his afternoon for pickup.”

My jaw clenched tight enough to crack. Rich had already canceled his visit for tonight, but I didn’t want to get into that with Eric’s baseball coach.

Instead, I smoothly said, “Okay.”

Martha knew to call both of us if something came up at practice. But, like most everyone in town, she had no idea that Rich was a flaming asshole and abusive.

Just then, I heard Eric’s voice. “Mom!” I glanced over to see him running toward me, clearly completely fine. As he approached, he stopped and held up his knee. “Look at my scrape!”

I pressed my lips together to keep from laughing. “Looks good.”

Martha smiled at us. “You’ll wait with him until his dad gets here?”

Eric went still, his smile disappearing instantly. “I thought I was coming with you?”

“We’ll see what your dad says when he gets here,” I said smoothly, keeping my tone level.

When I caught the look on Martha’s face, I realized maybe she understood a little more than I thought.

She rested her hand on Eric’s shoulder, giving him an encouraging squeeze. “Eric played great today. We’ll see you at practice on Monday.”

With a wave, she was gone. Once she was out of earshot, Eric looked up at me. “I don’t want to go with Dad. He said when he dropped me off that you were picking me up. What changed?”

It didn’t slip past my notice that Eric waited until Martha was clearly out of earshot to say anything. He knew, as well as I did, that people knowing what his dad was really like wouldn’t help the situation. My heart twisted with a sharp pain.

“I’m not sure. Let’s just see what your dad says when he gets here.”

I was relieved that Rich pulled up maybe a minute later. Eric had gone to get his bag from the field.

Rich didn’t even get out of his car. He rolled his window down. Before I could even ask what the deal was, he said, “I’m not actually taking him with me. I just wanted to make sure you didn’t baby him too much.”

I took a quick breath. I didn’t even have to reach for the shields that my nervous system needed to deal with my ex. It was almost a physical sensation of blocking inside.

“He’s fine. Do you want to see him?” I asked.

I glanced over my shoulder to see my son walking more slowly, his eyes on the ground. The joy he had had at showing off his scrape for me had been snuffed out at the mere mention of his father. My heart felt scraped as badly as his knee.

Rich called through the window. “Hurry it up!”

I forced myself to breathe slowly through my nose and ignore the anger rising inside.

Eric didn’t start running. He had his own little rebellions with his father. I refused to even look at Rich again. Every interaction for him was an opportunity. If I made eye contact, he would scoff and tell me I shouldn’t worry so much about my son. He might sneer at Eric for his scrape.

I waited, holding perfectly still until Eric stopped beside me. He lifted his eyes to his dad, holding his gaze without any emotion. “I thought Mom was picking me up.”

“She is. Just making sure you weren’t being a crybaby,” Rich said.

It was remarkable that the insides of my cheeks weren’t bleeding from how often I had to bite them. Eric’s expression remained flat. “I’m not.”

Rich simply nodded. “See you in two weeks.” He rolled his window up.

I stood perfectly still until he had driven away and turned down the road out of sight. I could feel the tension drawn like tight wires inside my body.

Eric reached for my hand. “Let’s go, Mom.”

I glanced down, and my little boy, the piece of my heart that lived and breathed as a separate human outside of me, was fine. His father’s comment didn’t even rattle him.

“Are you okay?” I couldn’t help but ask.

“I already told you I’m fine.”

We walked to my car, and he released my hand, glancing up as I opened the hatch on the back of my small car. “Dad’s a jerk. He always will be.” Eric shrugged. “I don’t care. I’m just glad we don’t live there anymore.”

My mouth must’ve dropped open because his brow furrowed. “It’s okay, Mom.”

I wanted to say so many things, but I didn’t. It would do nobody any good, much less me or Eric, for me to dwell on everything I thought I had done wrong. Because the biggest one was ending up with Rich, to begin with. Yet the paradox was that because of Rich, I had my son.

“Are your friends coming over tonight?” Eric asked a few minutes later when we were driving toward home.

I briefly slid my gaze sideways before looking back at the road. “They are.”

“I figured. You have them over when I’m supposed to be at Dad’s. I like it when they come over. It’s fun, and you laugh more than usual.”

My heart gave an achy beat, but I ignored it. The bar was low for laughing more when I’d been with Rich.