Chapter 5

Korvak

"Korvak, may I ask you something?"

I thought she was asleep. Her whisper was so low, I barely heard it, and supposed she was being quiet in case I had fallen asleep.

As if I could sleep with her in my arms like this.

"Aye, lass," I grunted.

"Why…why do you think a lady would revile you? I thought ‘twas because you were an orc, but you said no females . Why would you think a female of your own kind would revile you?"

I exhaled, and felt my breath catch in her hair which she'd braided to one side. I wanted the truth from her and thus would have to be honest in return. Somehow ‘twas easier to confess my own truths here in the darkness.

"I have a twin brother," I finally admitted. "The male holding the third lady stolen. His name is Varkaan."

She squirmed a bit, although I couldn't tell if ‘twas in interest or to get more comfortable. Either way, I bit my tongue and told my Kteer to remain silent.

And to quit thinking of the naughty illustrations portrayed in the scroll she'd hidden beneath us.

"That is my cousin Roxanna, Sorcha's younger sister. She is so fierce!" Effie sank back into my hold. "So, Sorcha was taken by Drakolt to be his Mate, but Varkaan took Roxanna?"

"I dinnae ken if she is traveling with him to the village," I admitted. "If so, she has naught to worry. Varkaan is a charmer, but honorable."

She seemed to sense my feelings. "You do not like that your twin is a charmer?"

I sighed again. "Twin males are not uncommon in our world, but when we were born, ‘tis said Malla the Beginner granted Varkaan all the beauty. He is considered uncommonly handsome, and I…"

Her small hand came to rest atop mine on her stomach. "Aye, Korvak?"

Hells, she was going to make me say it?

"I am ugly. I have always been considered ugly, even afore my first battle where a Bloodfire blade almost took my eye."

There. ‘Twas said.

Effie was silent for so long I wondered if she'd fallen asleep.

Finally, with a sound like a yawn, she patted my hand. "I think you are charming."

In the darkness, my brows rose.

If she'd called me handsome, or tried to reassure me, I would have known it to be a lie. But such a response…she was acknowledging my obvious deficiencies and seemed to be saying they didn't matter.

Mayhap she assumed my appearance didn't matter because she was bound to me no matter my appearance or temperament. In which case, a charming and easy temperament would be more valuable to her?

My Kteer purred, and my cock throbbed.

If she thought me charming, if she was flattered by my kindnesses, would that make her more likely to look on me softly? Kindly?

What are ye nattering on about? The female was ready to bend over and spread her legs for ye afore she knew ye were kind and charming, because she thinks ye own her !

But then why would she be so eager?

My arm tightened around her. "Effie? May I ask ye a question?"

Her murmured, "Aye, of course," sounded as if she were already half asleep.

"Have ye been married? Is there a husband searching for ye?"

I felt her stiffen. "Nay. I…nay."

Ah. "Is that why ye offered yerself to me?"

A long moment, then I felt her exhale. Mayhap she found it easier to confess in the darkness as well.

"I feared you. And what awaited me when I reached your village. I thought…" I heard her swallow. "I thought, if I belonged to you, if you were the only one making use of my body, then you would protect me from the others."

My body and Kteer responded together; I rose up on one elbow, looming over her, while it howled for blood.

"Ye thought I would—ye thought we would rape ye?"

In the dim light from the embers in the hearth, I saw her wince and roll onto her back .

"I did not know you."

"And now?"

Her fingers rested lightly on my chest. "I do not understand why you will not take what is offered."

Because I dinnae want to take. I want to give.

I threw myself back to the mattress with a huff. "Effie, why would ye think ‘twas a good plan? What makes ye think such a thing would work?"

She shrugged. "It has always worked before."

I went very still as her meaning set in. Ice slowly moved through my veins, and I spoke very clearly, very seriously, to the ceiling.

"Ye have done this afore? Offered yerself to one man to save yerself from many?"

"Where I come from…" She trailed off, and I rolled to face her. When my arm went around her again, I felt her relax slightly. "My mother is Lord Tarbert's cousin, Korvak. A younger daughter of his mother's sister. Hardly a connection at all, and through females , no less."

She spat the word as if being a female was somehow lesser.

"Aye?"

"My mother married beneath her slight station, a man-at-arms who claimed her when she fell pregnant. And when he died, she and I were left destitute. She turned to her cousin, begging him for protection, and he kindly allowed us a place in his household. But I did not have the protection of his name."

I was trying to understand these human ways. Did they not realize that any relation was meant to be protected? That females were to be revered for their ability to sustain the clan? Did their villages not come together to care for the neediest and most vulnerable?

She shrugged. "I was not important enough to be kept pure for marriage, so I was fair game for the men in the Tarbert household." Her yawn took us both by surprise. "My mother taught me ‘twas better to belong to one man rather than many, and, if I was lucky, that man might marry me, as my father had her."

Gods below.

Gods below.

"Ye…" I wasn't proud of the way my voice cracked as I tried to modulate my rage. "The man ye gave yerself to…did he recognize yer worth? Did he show he valued ye?"

Her little snort sounded half-asleep. "Worth? I have no worth, Korvak. This I know."

Oh, gods below !

This…explained much.

I reclined there in bed, the sweet little human in my arms slowly falling asleep whilst I tried to master my rage. I wanted to find this human male who'd taught her she was worthless and rip him apart myself.

When I thought I could speak without my voice betraying my fury, I asked, "And pleasure? Did this male show ye pleasure, Effie?"

Her sleepy little huff told me everything I needed to know.

"Not once."

I squeezed my eyes shut on a silent groan.

This broken female in my arms had learned a horrible lesson, a false one. She thought her only value was her body, so she'd bartered that…and received naught in return. This nameless bastard hadn't been able to protect her from me , and he'd given her no pleasure in return.

Well, now she's yers .

Mine.

While I hated the thought that she might only be here in my arms because she thinks she owes me for my protection, ‘twas impossible to deny my Kteer —and my cock—wanted me to claim her. No other female had been able to see past my appearance…was it possible Effie was different ?

And I could show her pleasure. Show her she was worth pleasure.

But how?

Effie

I woke warm.

‘Twas a novelty.

For certes, the Highlands had its share of heat waves, but these summer nights had been chilly, and I had spent the last few huddled under the blankets, wishing for more heat. Well, now I had it, in the form of the large green body curled around mine.

What surprised me was my reaction.

I should have stiffened, should have been frightened. Instead, I hummed happily and burrowed closer to Korvak and went back to sleep.

The next time I woke, he was gone, and the morning was well underway, although heavy clouds still hid the sun.

Startled and more than a little frantic, I realized I had missed the chance to make the morning porridge, and I jumped from the bed to look for my boots. Had Korvak, disgusted with my lazy attitude, gone into the woods to find a switch with which to beat me? Was he even now sharpening his sword?

What? What the hell are you talking about?

I hurried to gather the ingredients to break our fast. I needed to make food so he would find value—

Listen to yourself. You know him. Korvak will not hurt you because you slept in.

My steps slowed as I reached the hearth. While I hated arguing with my subconscious, ‘twas right this time. Korvak might have wagered and won me, but he had been naught but kind and honorable since then.

So ‘twas with a slower, more thoughtful frame of mind that I reached for the pot suspended over the embers…and found it heavier than I expected. Curious, I removed the lid.

Warm porridge awaited me, drizzled with honey and pine nuts, just the way I liked it.

I glanced to the door.

Korvak had not only not been angry with me for resting, but he had also made me breakfast, and done so quietly so I could continue sleeping.

See? He takes care of you.

He does .

The porridge was delicious.

When Korvak finally returned, he stomped around looking disgruntled, not meeting my thoughtful gaze. I wondered what he was irritated about, or if he was embarrassed by what we had discussed last night in the darkness.

As he bent over his arrows at the table, checking their fletchings, I thoughtfully kneaded the dough for the pan-fried biscuits I would make later that afternoon, and studied his profile.

Had it only been a few days ago I had seen him for the first time? Five—six, I supposed. I remembered how terrifyingly hideous he had appeared to me then, especially with that scar that crossed his face.

But was he really so ugly, compared to other orcs? I had to admit I had focused on so few of them, I could not compare. I suppose, having been raised with only human men to compare them to, any orc might be considered ugly.

Was Korvak ugly?

I studied his hands, so strong and sure, but delicate as they made minute adjustments to each feather. His arms were strong, aye, with tremendous muscles, but at no point had I ever felt threatened by that strength. His height, likewise, made me feel safe .

That left only his face. His jaw was too square to be handsome by human standards, his eyes too wide-set, his nose too broad. And that scar, which pulled his mouth up on the right side, likely had not helped his self-esteem much.

But nay, he was not ugly .

He was just…Korvak.

"I'm going hunting," he abruptly announced, pushing away from the table. "I have a craving for fresh plarket ."

I immediately nodded, wiping my hands on the makeshift apron I had made. "Then I will use that meat in the stew." I had no idea what plar-ket was, but ‘twould be easy enough to switch it out for the poultry he had brought before the rain.

Speaking of the rain… "Be careful out there, the mud will make the paths treacherous."

He paused in his readying movements and cocked his head, studying me. "Ye…would care if I were hurt?"

Blushing, I dropped my gaze and turned toward the hearth, busying myself in pulling out the big pan. "Of course I would care. I want some of that plarket ."

The noise he made might have been a snort of laughter, and I felt my lips curl .

"Be good, Effie, and I'll fetch ye fresh meat tonight."

There was heat in his gaze, and I wondered what he was thinking as he departed.

I spent the day in contemplation. Well, I chopped carrots and spent some time pampering Kelty, whom Korvak had left in the stalls behind the house. I tended the vegetable garden, and I finished hemming the serviettes I had cut from one of his scrap shirts.

But mostly I thought about Korvak. And my reaction to him.

And his reaction to my confession about John. He had been…angry. Nay, not just angry, there was more to it than that. I could feel the rage coming from him, because I had been tucked up next to him. But why would he be so angry on my behalf?

Was it because I had admitted to offering myself to him only because I wanted protection from other orcs? Especially after he had confessed to the fact that females normally avoided him? Were female orcs really so shallow?

Had Korvak seen my admission as further evidence that no woman would want him, other than as protection?

I stilled, my needle halfway through a stitch, and stared down at the yellow fabric. Had I hurt his feelings? Merely proven what he feared…that he was unlovable?

Nay .

I…I did not love Korvak. But I could understand why a woman might. He was gentle and kind and saved baby mice, for goodness' sakes. And…

Thoughtfully, I tied off the end of my thread and bit it near the knot.

Last night, right before I had fallen asleep, Korvak had asked me about finding pleasure. My gaze darted to the mattress, under which the Harlot's Guide scroll rested. I had not pulled it out since I stashed it there, but I had thought of it often.

And each time I imagined the positions the author described…I pictured Korvak performing them. Wondered what his hands would feel like on my skin. Wondered if he could give the pleasure described in the scroll.

Would he want to?

Listen to yourself. You were just worried about hurting his feelings .

Aye, that was the truth. Mayhap I needed to think of his pleasure. If I could show him that there was a female who didn't think him ugly…