Chapter Thirty-Eight Rosemary

Sinclair must have said something to him, as Davos came to find me on the afternoon of the sixth day. I wasn't at all surprised that he suddenly wanted to spend time with me. In fact, the only part of it that surprised me was that he had left me in peace for so long. I didn't dare hope that he had realized the error of his ways. More likely, he had been sulking, or perhaps was unsure how to approach an omega when he wasn't allowed to subdue her completely with his purr.

Still, he hadn't left himself a lot of time to seduce me into accepting his bond.

Perhaps he didn't expect to have to do that at all, and was only posturing for the sake of the rest of the pack. Although even that thought made me wonder if I was giving him too much credit.

He strode onto the training yard without hesitation, even as the group of soldiers who were practicing with polearms all hurried out of his way, like ducks fleeing the smooth approach of an alligator. His black hair gleamed in the sun, cropped shorter than Carlile's, and he wore a fine red tunic that dropped below his hips and buttoned up the front. I suspected each shiny button was worth more than my father's cottage, but I made myself continue my dual wield drills, refusing to acknowledge his presence, no matter how rich or powerful he might be. He had taken the oath, the same as me, and he couldn't hurt me until his ten days were up. Ignoring him was the only weapon I would ever have over the man, and I intended to wield it as much as possible.

"I'll need the omega for the remainder of the afternoon," he told Lynter, without a word to me.

I thought about stabbing him through the leg, but I suspected Lynt would growl at me if I did. On the other hand, the idea of Lynter getting so worked up that he growled at me did funny things to my insides, so I was tempted to do it anyway.

"Are you happy to go with Davos, Rosemary ?" Lynter asked, putting some stress on my name, and I beamed at him. A tiny spark of happiness flared in my chest, but I quickly snuffed it out as I realized both Carlile and Davos were now glowering at me.

"I guess so," I replied, knowing that, as always, I was only being given the illusion of choice. I handed my weapons to Carlile, a bit disappointed I hadn't started sweating in earnest so I'd have an excuse to go back to my room and bathe.

"I'll just get back into my skirts," I said, intending to take my time with that at least.

"No need," Davos said, his voice clipped. "We will return here when we're done. What you're wearing is fine." He leaned towards me to inhale, and then nodded. Bastian had made sure Ivan filled my spellstone that morning. I had thought it was so that we might go to the market, but now I was wondering if I should feel betrayed.

Lynter pursed his lips and stopped me with a hand on my shoulder as I moved to stand next to his brother.

"Here," he said and unhooked a sheath from his own belt, then attached it to my own. He held out a hand to Carlile and was passed my knife, which he carefully slid home.

"Don't try to use this unless it's an emergency," he said, his hazel-blue eyes locking on mine. "You're not good at it."

I made a choked sound that might have been a laugh, caught off-guard by the gesture and the insult.

"Come, omega," Davos said, impatiently. Lynter flicked his eyes to his older brother then back to me. He nodded, as if assuring me I would be safe with Davos.

For some reason, I believed him.

I walked stiffly beside powerful alpha as we went through the main gate in the wall surrounding the fort, wondering how he was going to approach his treatment of me. This was the first time I had spent any time with the man without his packmates around, and with my own autonomy. The memory of the blankness that had accompanied his resonating purr made me shudder. And yet, hadn't Bastian purred for me as well? It had been calming, but not numbing. What made Davos so different?

And what did I actually hope would happen at the end of the ten days, now? I had been very focused on the idea that I would gain freedom for Ivan, if not myself, but seeing the joy on my brother's face this morning, as he attended his lessons in spellcraft, I was starting to realize that he was probably not going to ‘escape' from the fort unless he was forced to leave. He was happy here.

And, shockingly, so was I.

The only possible life I could build for myself outside these walls, and without Ivan, would be a very lonely one. Hiding my dynamic meant suppressing my magic, so it was impossible to do it by myself, even if I could get another spellstone attuned to me. I'd have to foist myself on Ivan for the rest of our days, or live in isolation, hoping against the odds that I could feed and shelter myself in the wilds, and that no other people would ever find me.

Here I had… friends. Friends who were rapidly becoming more than friends, no matter how much I told myself that attraction to alphas was a terrible mistake. I had never thought I would long for sex again after what my father had done to me, but when I thought of Cantor's enthusiasm, of Bastian's hot eyes and cool commands, and even of Lynter's respectful touches and Sinclair's dark, smooth voice, my body would prickle with desire and I would be unable to keep my fingers from between my thighs at night.

And yet all of it depended on the man strolling sedately by my side as we walked out the castle gates. A man who still seemed prepared to forcibly bond me, and perhaps to prevent the others from bonding me in a way I could accept. A mutual bond.

I had puzzled over why Sinclair had even told me about true bonds, knowing they might always be out of my reach, and decided he was probably hoping I could understand Davos a little better.

What he didn't realize was that I already understood Davos all too well. Men had put their own wants before my needs many times. Made decisions about my life and body based on what was best for their own selves. I'd witnessed betrayal driven by greed and pride, and I was sick to my soul of being a hoarded treasure. An omega, rather than just Rosemary.

Davos was just one more man who saw me as a prize and not a person. If he couldn't own me, then no one would.

It made me burn with resentment. If not for him, the path forward would be clear. As it was, he held all the other alphas in his thrall. He had become my new manacle.

"We're going to visit some of our local households to collect taxes," he said, at last as if I should be grateful for the outing. I almost snorted. Of course his idea of a fun day out was collecting taxes. God's rot, he was an asshole.

Unsure what to say in reply, I remained quiet. I was a bit surprised we weren't taking horses, but wondered if he remembered how bad I was at riding. Or perhaps he worried I would try to run again, despite my oath.

It took us half a candle to reach the first household, and I was happy to note that all my exercise over the past week or two was starting to pay off. I was only panting a little bit after keeping up with the much taller alpha. Wearing pants instead of skirts definitely helped, although my boots were still a bit too heavy for comfort.

The business we visited was a blacksmithy, three times as large as the one in my village. A cluster of buildings surrounded a large area of bare ground, partially covered with a high awning of raw, shiny wood. Several men stood under the awning, stoking a massive clay oven with magic, or swinging hammers as they pounded at glowing metal. Sparks flew into the air, and the warm, bitter scent of smoke and ashes hit me, making me halt several paces away, even as Davos continued on. The familiar noises and smells flowed into me, panic rising like a fluttering bird in my chest.

The eldest of the men, with the most bulging arm muscles, who I assumed was the main blacksmith, set down his hammer at our approach and greeted Davos warmly, gripping his forearm. He asked after the pack, before sending an apprentice for coins to pay the taxes.

The sight of the apprentice made me queasy. He was just a young man in a heavy apron, nothing more. They didn't look a thing alike, and yet, all I could see was my former lover standing over me with a smirk, trying to convince my father that since he'd breached me before, there was no harm in letting him do it again.

I was lucky my father was so miserly.

Instead he'd used my mouth, and though he was nowhere near as physically intimidating as the alphas who'd been there before, the mixture of thrill and disgust in his eyes had made it all so much worse.

Once I thought those eyes had looked at me with love.

Foolish, terrible, stupid omega. Who could love you?

My throat drew tighter and tighter, until I couldn't breathe, air escaping me only in panicked gasps. My eyes swam with black dots, and I swayed on my feet, sure I was about to fall.

Suddenly, in the midst of the panic, a small, silky warmth curled up in my chest. It almost seemed to snuggle into me, like a tiny, trusting animal. The warmth tugged at me, loosening my lungs, and moments later Cantor was hugging me, propping up my trembling body.

Somehow, he was hugging me both inside and out.

Shaking, I let the huge man hold me, let his warmth seep into my bones as he stroked my hair until I thought I might weep from the relief.

"Do you feel it?" I finally asked him, my voice muffled on his chest. He nodded slowly, drawing back so I could see his face.

"I felt your fear and sadness here," he said and patted his chest. "Like I do with my packmates."

I gulped and felt a fresh wave of panic at the thought. Sinclair had said the true bond would start even without a bite.

So that meant it was already too late.

I tried to work out what this would mean. Was I panicking because they had somehow managed to sneak a bond into me without a bite? Or was I panicking because I knew Davos would never let Cantor complete it? I had seen the way they all treated my gentle alpha. There was no way Davos would risk losing command over his pack by allowing Cantor to bond with me first, or even to true bond with me at all. The packlead needed absolute control. I would be bonded by Davos alone, and it would destroy this gentle, pulsing clot of affection that was nestled so sweetly in my chest.

I blinked away tears and forced myself to smile at my sweet, worried alpha. Because he was mine. There was no denying it now.

"Cantor," Davos snapped from behind me. "I'm spending time with the omega right now. Go do something productive."

Bristling, I turned in Cantor's arms to glare at the insufferable man.

"Cantor is more productive than you'll ever be, Sir Tax Collector." I shot out the words before my brain caught up to me, my first impulse to defend my alpha. I stifled a grunt as Cantor squeezed me tight, and I feared for a flick that he was upset with me, just as a warm, sunshiney joy lit in our bond.

No, my alpha was proud of me. My cheeks flushed with the pure strength of his emotions. Cantor had never been deceptive to me, and now here was the proof. His absolute happiness at being near me, of being defended by his omega, glowed like a tiny, fluffy sun in my chest.

So I braced myself for Davos to spend his wrath, knowing it was worth it.

However, instead of yelling at me, Davos only shrugged. "Nevertheless, it's my turn for now."

I had to force down the impulse to scream at him that I was not a pony ride at the market. Cantor squeezed my hand and kissed it and, impulsively I reached up and grabbed his face, bringing it down for a fierce goodbye kiss.

Cantor was always eager to kiss me thoroughly, whether it was on the mouth or elsewhere, and it was with no small satisfaction that I eventually drew back to check on Davos.

Unfortunately, the big alpha gave no hint of anger, only waiting impassively until Cantor finally walked away.

If Davos knew the man at all he'd realize Cantor wouldn't go far. My sweet stalker never did, and for the first time I had no mixed feelings about that at all.

Davos attempted to engage me in small talk as we walked to the next business, taking an off road route this time, through the forest that surrounded the fort and local town. I gave him one word replies as much as possible. I was angry, and just a little bit smug, as I realized my clipped replies were starting to frustrate the normally jovial packlead.

Finally he stopped and turned to me.

"Little omega, what are you expecting to happen at the end of these ten days?" He asked me, so abruptly I blinked at him, my lips parting in surprise.

"I know Sinclair told you about bonds and how they work. What do you think I should do?"

Taken aback by the frank question, I couldn't think of an answer for several moments, but Davos waited patiently. The trees rustled around us, moved by a small breeze. The scent of pine filled my nostrils, both from the alpha in front of me, and from the trees surrounding me.

Finally I ventured to say, "let me go?"

Davos barked a short laugh. "Is that truly what you would advise me to do, if you were not the omega in question? It's not at all tempting, little one."

He sighed heavily, then dropped onto a nearby log without a care for his fancy clothes, and patted the space next to himself. Frowning at his audacity, I chose to sit on a mossy stone some distance away instead.

"There are two main reasons and one additional, smaller reason that I can't let you go. Can you tell me what you think they are?"

"Why?" I blurted. "What do you care what I think?"

He shrugged, then rested his elbows on his knees, chin cupped in his hands. Even bent over like the weight of the world was on his shoulders, he looked powerful. He was the second tallest of the pack after Cantor, but unlike his lanky packmate, Davos rippled with muscle. His black eyes, so much like Carlile's, pinned me under them.

"I care about what everyone thinks. But most of the time what they think about is what they want . It's my job as leader to make sure everyone gets what they need ." His voice lowered thoughtfully, as he continued. "It's also often useful to hear other perspectives. Even if I don't agree with them. I am not skilled at knowing what other people think unless they tell me directly."

Shifting uncomfortably, I couldn't find the lie in his words. Was that a kind of apology? An admission that he had done something bad to me without realizing I didn't want it? I thought back to what he had said when he was toting me around like a dead thing, claiming that he could make me love him with the bond. Surely he wasn't trying to say that he didn't know I was resisting him. He couldn't be that oblivious.

Shrugging, I kept my voice steady as I said, "I imagine one reason you won't let me go is to keep me safe from other alphas." I managed not to sneer as I said the word ‘safe'. "An omega is a valuable thing and you don't want another pack to have me." I pursed my lips, as I thought out the next part, wondering if I should say it aloud. I decided to be brave. "I suppose another reason might be that you don't want the king to know that you kept me from the capital."

He cocked his head, and smiled at me. The curves of his lips and eyes lit up his face, and before I could force the feeling down, I felt a faint glow of pride that he was happy with my response.

Stupid, stupid omega.

"That's clever reckoning," the packlead said. "Keeping you safe is one of my reasons and you have unpacked part of it. Omegas are precious." I snorted and he raised a brow at me, but didn't comment on the inelegant sound.

"However, more importantly, I don't want you harmed for your own sake. If you weren't our omega, I would gladly find a worthy pack for you for the same reason. I was planning to find good alphas for your brother."

He snorted this time and I almost smiled at the unexpected noise. Instead, I raised a brow as he had done to me and was rewarded by a wry grin. I had to internally smack myself to stop a responding grin on my own face.

"It's not pride that drives me," he told me in a deceptively gentle tone, "but fear for your safety."

I scoffed quietly. Did he really believe that? He was fooling himself.

"Can you think of another reason, little omega?"

I noticed he ignored my comment about the king, but decided not to press it.

"You want to bond me," I whispered.

He sighed and scrubbed at his face with his hand.

"Yes I do," he admitted. "But I think it would help you to know why."

My brow creased. I already knew why . Omegas were glorified stress relief for alphas. Cute little sex toys they could take out and put away at will. He wanted an omega for his pack, a good and docile one, and one which strengthened the magic of his mage to boot.

What other reason could there be?

"A bond with an omega can strengthen magic in an alpha," Davos said, echoing my thoughts, and then he completely veered away from them.

"I need to bond with you in order to become the next king. Together, we can defeat my father and the Gorgon Pack."