53. Grace

Broken doesn't begin to describe the gaping hole that now exists in my heart.

I love Deacon.

I will always love him. But he isn't my Mate, and seeing him pull up his walls one by one before locking himself away hurts me in a way I couldn't have prepared myself for. His eyes meet mine, and he's an entirely different person. Devoid of emotion, indifference shining from his expressionless face.

He's looking at me like I'm a stranger.

I'm so sorry.

"Who?" he asks, tapping his fingers on the table. His tone is flat as if he were asking about the weather rather than the person who stands between us.

Fear fills me as I worry about what he will do to him. I wonder if Marcus being his best friend, was better or worse in this situation.

Marcus enters the diner dripping wet, and cheeks flush in a way that tells me he ran over here as soon as he heard Deacon was back.

Early.

We planned to meet him to talk to him and to break the news in the kindest way we could.

Marcus's eyes catch mine, and an apology lies in them as water cascades down his face. The rain matching my tears.

The flash of Deacon's wolf in his eyes pulls even more fear to the surface.

I can't lose either one of them.

I don't care if that's selfish. Deacon has been in my life for too long to have him gone, and I can't lose Marcus. He's my Mate; his friendship and companionship have been everything these last six months.

They both hold a piece of me.

Deacon's head turns as he stands from the booth, giving me his back. A growl escapes him as he registers who stands there.

Marcus allows the door to close behind him, silencing the rain, and stands there staring at his best friend.

"You?" Deacon says, his tone is unreadable from behind him. I jump up, no longer able to contain myself.

"No!" I cry, not sure who I'm saying it to. I don't want Deacon to shift and attack Marcus, and I don't want Marcus to give him a reason.

How could you do this to us?

I ask, questioning The Fates.

"Deacon," Marcus starts, his hands going up in a sign of surrender, showing he isn't a threat. "Listen, we didn't," he tries to explain.

"Don't," Deacon says, lifting his hand into the air to stop him. "Do. Not. Lie. To. Me," he says, punctuating the words one by one. He walks toward Marcus, each step increasing my heart rate and panic. When they are inches apart, Deacon speaks again.

No, please, not like this.

"Get out of my way," Deacon says, command filling his voice at the statement, and Marcus's wolf flashes in his eyes, challenge evident.

Oh no!

Marcus clenches his jaw, physically fighting with his wolf before stepping to the side and letting Deacon walk out the door.

The door slamming behind him rings in the air, and I collapse to the floor, no longer able to hold myself up with the weight of the world lying on my broken heart.

How will I survive this?

How will he?

How could you?