Chapter 37

37

Cass

F or the first time all week, the last night before our parents are to return home, Cole and I don't have sex. I caved and let him sleep in my bed because I know how nervous he must be. I am too. He doesn't even try to make a move, though. Cole sleeps rolled away from me all night.

Not that either of us gets much sleep. My head refuses to shut up long enough for me to fall asleep.

The next day, Cole barely says a word as I help him deal with hotel issues and fentanyl delivery delays.

We gave all the Sigma Chi guys another free night's stay and another round of lap dances to try and keep them here through Sunday.

Of course, it worked.

I shouldn't have told him they were here. I should've just stolen a lock of his hair or whatever for the test, then he wouldn't be filled with so much cautious hope.

I hate seeing Cole in his sexy new power suit so quiet and withdrawn, but I don't leave his side all day. I would give anything to see a cocky smirk again on his smug face.

While I told him not to get his hopes up, he obviously didn't listen to me.

This is the first time in my life that I've ever really hurt for someone else.

Is that what love is? Caring about someone else so much that you feel everything that they feel?

If so, I don't want it. That shit needs to fuck off and leave me alone.

But it's impossible to get rid of the feelings because love is not something that you can just stop.

I know I'm in love with Cole. I think I've loved him ever since the night he came to my room covered in the blood of two men he thought wronged me. Maybe they did. I'm not ready to admit to myself that Cole was right about them, about what they did to me the first time.

When it all happened, I was confused but mostly happy about it, I think. I told myself it was a good thing to finally lose my virginity and have an exciting sex life.

Now, though? I wish they hadn't come into the gym that night.

I wish that Cole would've been my first.

If I could go back in time, that's the only thing I would change. It's my only real regret.

The fact that I am literally checking my phone for an email of the results every single minute of the day just goes to show how much I want this for Cole. I want him to finally know who his father is and meet him.

Late that afternoon, when the email finally does come, I can't tap my finger on it fast enough to open it.

Holy shit.

Holy shit.

There's a match.

"There's a match!" I exclaim drawing everyone's attention to the check-in desk, including Cole's.

He abandons the computer and phone he was on scheduling reservations, hanging up on the person to get to his feet. "There's really a match?" he asks me softly when he's by my side.

I nod and offer him my phone. He reads the results for so long, like he can't believe they're real. Eventually, I pluck my phone from his hand.

"Do you want to meet him?" I ask.

He paces away, rubbing the back of his neck. "Yes. I think so."

"Are you going to tell him he's your father?"

"I…I don't know yet. I'll figure out what to say once he's standing in front of me."

"Okay. That's a good plan," I agree. "He could be anywhere, but hopefully in the casino tonight. Should we try calling him to the front desk?"

"Yeah. Yes. That's a good idea instead of meeting him in one of the clubs while there are tits in his face."

"Agreed."

When Cole returns my phone to pull his own out of his pocket, I know without even looking that he's searching up his father online. He had probably found him on social media while he was doing his research a few weeks ago.

"He's an accountant in Thousand Oaks, California. Owns his own business, Phelps and Embler, CPAs," Cole says.

"Nice."

"Oh, and he didn't play basketball." Coming over to me, he shows me old photos from the fraternity's site. "He played rugby at USC. "

"Rugby?" I say in surprise. "I thought that was just a British sport."

"It's like a badass version of American football," he says with a smile. "My dad must have been a tough guy when he was in college."

"Must have been," I agree, glad to see him looking lighter, like his usual self. There's still some nervous energy coming from him, but he seems happier for sure.

"Thank you for this, for finding him, Cassie. I can never repay you…" he says to me, his eyes filled with so much warmth it scares the shit out of me. I still let myself soak in his admiration, knowing that this is what it must feel like to be loved. And then I just get angry because I can't. I can't let him love me or he'll never leave.

"Page Andrew Phelps," I go over and tell the front desk manager. Neither Cole nor I bet on this man to be his father.

"What…why?" the mousy little woman asks.

"Tell him he has a phone call at the front door," I huff.

Just a few minutes later, after the announcement is made, the tall, lean man from the photo comes strolling toward the front desk with the same swagger in his walk as Cole's. I can't believe we didn't notice it last night while we were watching the guys get drunk.

Cole stops breathing next to me as Andrew comes to a stop at the front desk. Smiling genuinely and friendly at the clerk he says, "Hi, I'm Andrew Phelps. The announcement said there's a phone call for me?"

The manager looks nervously over her shoulder at me and Cole. When Cole doesn't say anything or even take a breath, I step forward. "Hi, Andrew. You're with the fraternity reunion from USC?"

"Yes," he answers. "Where can I take the call?"

"Ah, well," I hedge, glancing at Cole then his father. "Actually, there's no phone call. Sorry. We meant to call a different Andrew."

"Oh," he says, his smile dimming. "Well, no harm, no foul."

Wow, he seems like a really nice guy. And handsome for a man in his forties. There's so much of Cole in him just at the surface level. No telling what else they could have in common.

"Have a good night," he says before he turns to walk away.

That's when Cole finally snaps out of his trance. "Wait!" he calls, halting the man's steps.

Cole

It's him.

He's really here.

My father in the flesh. The man who I share blood with. He not only has a name but a face, a voice, and a seemingly kind personality.

"Yes?" Andrew Phelps says when he turns back around.

Thinking quickly, I clear my burning throat and ask him, "Do you…maybe you remember my mother from your time at USC. Her name is Vanessa."

The man's brow furrows. My father's brow furrows. After a moment of serious consideration, he says, "No, I don't remember any Vanessas at all. Sorry. It was a large campus. Maybe she was there a different year than I was."

"Right. Yeah. Actually, she may have gone by a different name at the time. Maybe if you saw her again…" I trail off, not ready to let him walk away just yet. I quickly pull up a photo of my mom on my phone and show him the screen. He comes closer to the desk, squinting at the image as I study his face up close and personal, searching for similarities. I swear we have the same nose and mouth.

"Wow. She's beautiful," he says. "And vaguely familiar, but…I can't place her."

"She should look familiar. You had sex with her at least once at the fraternity house," Cass bluntly informs him, thankfully letting the cat out of the bag when I couldn't.

"What?" Andrew chuckles and glances around as if looking for cameras like he thinks he's on a show being set up for laughs. "That's…how would you know who I had sex with when I was in college? I can barely remember myself."

"She knows you had sex with her because I'm your son," I blurt out. Quick like ripping off a Band-Aid and it's done and over. There's no going back now.

"My...no." He shakes his head, still smiling good-naturedly. "That's...that's impossible."

"Cassie, show him."

"Even better," she says while tapping on the screen. "I can print out a copy for him to keep."

"A copy of what?" Andrew asks, glancing between the two of us in confusion.

A moment later the nearby printer spits out the page. I grab it and offer it to the man. While he reads it, I tell him, "You know that DNA sample you gave Friday night? It wasn't for a clinical trial. It was a paternity test."

He eyes me dubiously, then the paper, staring at the words and numbers on the page before his jaw goes slack.

When Andrew looks up at me again, studying me as if trying to figure out if I'm scamming him or what, I quickly explain to him, "I'm a grown man about to graduate from college, so I'm not asking you for child support. I don't want any money from you. I just...I guess I just wanted to know your name, who you are. And I thought maybe you would want to know about me. If I'm wrong..."

"I-I-I think I need to sit down," Andrew mutters as he spins in a circle looking for a chair.

Grabbing a rolling chair from behind the front desk, I push it around to him and he flops his tall frame into it while reading the test results again.

Cass comes up behind me, and whispers, "Worst timing ever. "

"What do you mean?" I ask her since there doesn't seem to be a perfect time to spring fatherhood on an unsuspecting man.

"Your mom and my dad just got back to town."

"Oh shit," I groan. "How do you know? Did they text you?"

"No, they just walked in the front door and spotted us. They're coming over to us right now." She nods her head in their direction.

" Fuck ."

"Hey, how was your trip?" Cass asks sweetly as both of us move to stand in front of Andrew and block their view of the stunned man sitting in a computer chair in the front lobby. My father. "Bet you're exhausted, ready to crash."

"No, it was a very relaxing week," my mom says as she looks between us and around us to Andrew who, when I sneak a peek at him, slinks from the chair down to the casino floor. Yeah, I think he's going into shock or some shit.

"Is everything okay? We did worry about you two handling things," Dante says, slipping his arm around my mom's waist to pull her to his side.

"Us? We're fine. This place runs like a well-oiled machine," I tell them.

"The other businesses do too," Cass adds with a wink. "So why don't you two go on up and unpack and we'll handle things down here for the rest of the day."

I can't help but look back at my father again to see if he's going to pass out or something. Andrew lifts his face from the results and his eyes bulge at the sight of my mom.

"You...we...wow," he murmurs as he staggers back to his feet. Then he comes over to my mom and Dante. Not that he notices the imposing mafia king attached at her hip. "You were that beautiful wild girl who came from nowhere one night and then poof, disappeared?" he asks my mother.

"I'm sorry," Dante says quietly, taking a step between Andrew and my mom. "But who the fuck are you?"

I make the introductions, the sound bizarre coming out of my mouth. "Mom, Dante, this is Andrew Phelps, my, ah, biological father."

"What?" my mom shouts loud enough for the entire casino to hear her.

"We had one crazy night with two of my friends. You must remember it," the dummy says around Dante, ignoring the death glare the mobster is giving him. I guess I got all my brains from my mother.

"Of course, she fucking remembers," Dante says while my mother stands there frozen, staring at Andrew like he's the ghost of hookups past. "Vanessa was only sixteen when you and your buddies gang banged her and knocked her up!"

"Wow," I mutter with a look in Cass's direction. That's a whole lot of TMI I did not need in my life. I never needed to know that about my mother. And I can tell by the embarrassed blush spreading over her cheeks, and the fact that she doesn't dispute it, that it's true. This is why she couldn't tell me who my father was? He could've been any one of those three men in the fraternity she fucked at the same time.

"Let's...let's all just go upstairs and sit down to talk," Cass suggests.

Turning to Andrew, I tell him, "You can leave if you want. I can put my number on the test results if you want to ever talk. If not, it's cool." I'm trying to get him out of here before Dante fills his body with bullet holes and I never get a chance to speak to him again.

"It's not cool if you don't," Cass loudly whispers to the man. "He's your son. And while it's not your fault that you weren't made aware of his existence, you know now. Cole doesn't want any of your money. He just wants to get to know you. If you're worth knowing."

"I can...I'm supposed to be heading to the airport in the morning," Andrew responds. "But I'll...I'll reschedule and have my partner cover my appointments so I can stay another day. If you want to talk?"

"That would be great." I'm immediately filled with an immense relief that he's not running off. I still take the paper from his hand, jot down my number on the bottom, and return it to him before saying, "I'll get everyone upstairs and then I'll be right back down," I promise him.

Walking away from the man who made me is difficult to say the least.

And the elevator ride up is silent as a graveyard.

But as soon as the four of us walk into the penthouse, my mom spins around on me and yells, "How the hell did this happen?"

Rather than let Cass take the brunt of my mother's ire, I quickly claim responsibility. "I called up the frat bros from USC's Sigma Chi and invited them to a reunion here at the casino. Eli helped get the DNA tests for free lap dances, claiming it was for a clinical trial."

"Well, that's...genius," my mom says. Turning to Dante, she says, "Isn't that amazing, for him to come up with such a plan?"

Well, shit. Now I feel like a bastard for taking Cass's credit.

"Ingenious," Dante murmurs, still looking homicidal as we stand around like we're playing four squares.

"Actually, Cass thought..." I start.

"I thought it would never work, but men will apparently do anything for a free lap dance, even give a DNA swab," she says, interrupting me before I can confess that it was all her idea.

"Wow. That is so crazy," my mom remarks. "And it worked. It actually worked. One of them is...the man you were talking to..."

"His name is Andrew Phelps," I repeat. "Does that ring any bells, Mom?"

She cringes. "No, not really."

"Did you use the name Vanessa Brooks back then?" I ask her.

She considers my question for a long moment then shakes her head. "No, not at that point. I think I just used whatever campus ID badge I found. And whenever I didn't need to prove my identity to anyone, I just told people my name was Kate, since it was close to Katia. That's probably what I told Andrew." She suddenly throws her arms around me. "I know it may not look like it, but I'm so happy for you, sweetie. I'm just…shocked. I-I felt so guilty for not knowing who your father was or where to find him. And I was embarrassed by the number of potentials that it felt impossible to find all of them for a test."

"So, you're not mad at me for going behind your back to find him?" I ask as she pulls back.

She lifts her palm to gently cup my cheek. "No. No, of course not, sweetie. I just hope...well, I hope he's worthy of you."

"He offered to stay a day, so he seems decent," I remind her. "He could've just called us all liars and ran away."

"You look like him, especially your height," she points out.

"I thought so too, but I wasn't sure if it was just in my head, making me see what I thought was there."

"You do look like him," Dante agrees. "And I apologize for my reaction. I won't kill him. Not unless he does something to deserve it."

"Thank you, Dante. He had no idea how old I really was," my mom reminds her mob boss husband. "I lied to him and his friends so that is on me, not them. From what I remember, they all treated me with respect. Well, as much respect as you can have when..."

Dante holds up his palm to stop her from saying another word. "Okay, butterfly. I think you've said enough on that matter."

"Right. Sorry."

"We should let Cole get back down there and talk to him," Dante suggests. "Assuming there were no other emergencies while we were gone that need to be discussed right away."

"I can catch you up," Cass offers, even though I was hoping she would come back downstairs with me to talk to Andrew. But I guess this is something I should probably do on my own.

"Thank you," I tell her, meaning for everything. She did something incredible, and she should get all the credit for it.

When she notices me staring at her, she subtly shakes her head and whispers, "Don't."

She doesn't want me to tell them this was her idea .

Fine. I won't. Yet.

But someday she deserves to get credit for giving me this priceless gift. One I have dreamed of for years but never thought would come true.

She's right about me doing the same for her, too. I would move mountains if it meant finding her some closure on what happened to her mother. And I hate that I can't return the favor for her.

That Cass went to so much trouble to find my father for me makes me certain that she's in love with me. Maybe even as crazy in love with me as I am with her.

I know she loves me, so why does she keep insisting that I go back to New York? It can't just be that she wants to be Dante's heir. There's something that I'm missing, something she won't tell me.

God, she's so fucking confusing.

And how the fuck does she think I will ever be able to just up and leave her in a few weeks?