21

"You went off on your dad though," he whispered after his food arrived and others sat around us.

"I'm pissed at the way he handled it," I admitted. "And all of it explodes because we don't have much time left together." I hurried to wipe away a tear when I felt it fall. "It's all really fucking complicated, and I have trouble just fighting some days, beastie."

"I know. I know you do, and I think it's amazing that you never stop fighting. Sometimes you just need to be reminded how much better things are or how far you've come."

I nodded because I didn't know what else there was to say. I sighed when I was done with the food in front of me. "I acted like a fucking child throwing a tantrum and storming out of there. I haven't grown at all, beastie."

"Yeah, you have. You really have." He chuckled when I gave him a look that I didn't buy it. "You didn't fly off on your bike or block us. You didn't ditch your detail. You—you've come so far. You know it when you're not so bogged down. None of us are mad at you and—just trust me today?"

"As long as you include conveyor belt sushi because I promised them we'd go and now my tummy expects it."

"Let's get your phone because you need it, and you promised Izzy you'd invite her next time and I don't want her to beat you up."

I laughed. Izzy never could, but she would spank me every time she saw me for months if I did forget her. I loved that about her and the fact Hudson remembered.

Ara went with a few fairies to go start the ice cream order and Hudson turned to me, cupping my cheek. I was curious what was going on, but I felt his hesitation.

"You can always say anything to me, beastie," I promised.

He nodded, looking relieved. "Let's go find your phone and then go see Rich."

I swallowed loudly. Yeah, I did want to do that actually. I stood on my toes and kissed him, glad he relaxed.

My phone was with Shael and I thanked her, glad she didn't push when she saw I had guards and was with Hudson. Then we went to the cemetery Rich was buried at.

I ended up plopping down and leaning against a headstone.

"Can you do that here?" Hudson asked quietly.

I shrugged as I glanced around. "I'm on the backside of it, not sitting on a grave. I can't see the person really getting upset about that and if they do—well, stuff it. It's not like they're really there besides their body. I see it as leaning against the side of their house or sitting on their curb."

He seemed to accept that and sat next to me.

I told him the story about how I first met Rich, the human who had been placed at the same foster home as me. I chuckled.

"What?" he asked when I simply stared off.

We were interrupted when our ice cream arrived. We thanked them and the fairies took the hint and didn't hover.

"I just realized that you remind me of Rich," I admitted. "Your attitude with me and—he was quiet, but he paid attention. I was such a brat to him the first time we met, ranting that he better not touch me or get any ideas because I would bite, kick, or kill him in his sleep. You know what he said to me?"

"What?" Hudson asked in between bites.

"Let me know when you get all you're feeling out and we can become friends," I whispered. "You look like you could use a friend and so could I. That was it. He just let me lose my head and explode when I needed to. Gave me a hug when I let him. Even quietly followed after me when I needed air and left that house, not having anywhere to really run."

"Sounds like a good guy and exactly what you needed," he said after a minute. "Thanks for protecting and helping her, Rich. You're a solid guy."

A portal opened and Lucca stepped out with his detail.

"Awww, we missed ice cream?" one of the fairies whined.

"We're in a cemetery, idiot," a different one hissed, cuffing him upside the head.

It was the comic relief we needed, Hudson and I both snorting.

"Sometimes I wonder who is babysitting whom," Lucca drawled.

"I'm over a hundred years old," the first fairy huffed.

"Act like it," the three of us tossed right back… And we weren't the only ones.

Yeah, I wasn't the only one who laughed.

I handed over one of my pints to Lucca when he came closer. I frowned when he didn't accept it.

"Not sure you'll want to give me your ice cream when I'm about to blast you, cream puff," he said with a sigh.

"I'll always share my ice cream with you even if you blast me as long as it's valid," I hedged.

He crossed his arms over his broad chest and raised an eyebrow. "So how did the conversation you recently had with my dad go?"

"Fucking snitch," I growled and tossed the pint up. He still deserved it.

And I deserved the lecture I was going to get.

Lucca snorted and grabbed a spoon from one of the bags. "He didn't snitch actually. He started sending me the sloth calendars and meeting notes. He made it clear that I needed to get more involved with the sloth again and couldn't be so absent and only involved in Faerie affairs." He gave me a hard look. "Funny, since I didn't tell him I wanted to be Alpha."

I opened my mouth but then closed it. Trying a few more times before frowning. Then I gave a wordless growl. "Okay, I'm an extra asshole then. I thought—no, you're right, you did say you didn't tell him yet. I honestly don't remember if he seemed surprised."

"No, happy like you confirmed it," Hudson mumbled.

"Oh, so you were there too?" Lucca chuckled darkly.

"Tams was acting squirrelly, so I followed, and Neldor caught on too, but before you get mad, please hear me on something," Hudson explained. He waited for Lucca to give a swift nod. "Your dad is too controlling. He always has been. Way over the line."

"I know that. I saw how he started to mold and work my brother when we were on the outs," Lucca accepted.

"Yeah, but some of what you—not all of what you bitched about…"

"You saw more problems than he complained about?" I checked, nodding when Hudson did. "Yeah, that was a concern for me too." I met Lucca's curious gaze. "He kept saying that he would be careful but that he had duties as the grandfather of your children and the future of the sloth. He wasn't hearing that mindset was still an issue."

Lucca glanced away. "I know. Which was why I made it clear to him that I grew up without a grandfather and my kids could too. He seems to think Mother leaving him is the threat, and he won't risk that."

"Fucking idiot," I hissed.

"For this," he clarified. "Getting involved with the training of our firstborn bear. He made it clear he knows he's hands off for any fairies or my ‘adopted' children your other mates might have." He ground his jaw a bit.

Oh boy. Ronald Von Thann clearly said something about those kids that probably wasn't flattering.

It was best not to hear it. I'd already murdered one person that day. I didn't want to make it two.

Well, technically, Stefanie had done it so…

Not the point.

"What he said was disconcerting, Lucca, and I don't think we're enough to handle this." I met his gaze. "I don't want to kill him, but if he even thinks to go near my kids—no matter their birth father—I will. I have to so they're all protected and no one else would even dare to do it. The royal journals are clear it has to happen or chaos follows."

"I don't think we're enough for this," Hudson agreed before Lucca could respond. "We've gone to him twice, but he's backsliding and only takes Neldor as the real threat. I think we need a discussion with our ‘parents' and your mom, Lucca."

I frowned when he said that, not sure what he meant.

"You mean people to stand in for those who don't have parents because otherwise he sees us all as kids," Lucca muttered. "Or it will be a fight between your parents and him." He nodded when Hudson did. "Why can't he just fucking let go? Why can't…" He shook his head. "He was so close for a bit."

"What?" I asked when he seemed to want to say more.

"He was scared of something. I saw the fear, but then it was gone," Lucca admitted.

"I threatened him with my dogs."

"That would do it, but he really doesn't think you'd give the order."

I snorted. I wanted to already. It killed me that the bastard was still alive.

Seriously. Asshole.

In a miracle of timing, we managed to gather almost everyone we needed, and the Vogels even let us have the meeting at their castle. Clearly, Mrs. Von Thann knew something had happened between her mate and son because she looked worried.

I hadn't even gotten a chance to talk to Julian, but the kiss we shared made it clear we were fine and could talk later.

"Mr. Moore isn't able to join us?" Headmaster Edelman asked as he joined with Anya White.

"He has something big with his studies and it's very visible," Adrian Geiger said as he sat down with Claudia. "We will be sitting in as his parents and also update him late. He was unaware of the situation as well—he has too many eyes on him with wrapping up law school and the process."

"Plus, he's beating all those snobby shits big time who wrote him off for all the wrong reasons," Claudia added. "So he has to be extra careful."

Darby would also default to whatever I wanted and we all knew it. I didn't mean it in a bad way, and he certainly wasn't a pushover or doormat. No, he made it clear that if I carried a child for nine months and had to go through labor then I had the ultimate vote on most things.

Smart man.

Also, we both knew I was less forgiving and deadly.

We all froze when Ronald Von Thann arrived, glancing around and frowning before locking in on his mate. "I knew you were up to something. I knew it. What is—"

"And I knew you wouldn't listen," she whispered, giving him a defeated look. "How horrible is that? You go to meetings all of the time and never bother explaining where or who they're with and I accept that. I trust you're not having an affair or doing anything bad when you actually have. I haven't, and yet you have to be so in control to—"

"I'm Alpha," he interjected.

She slapped the table hard enough that it had to hurt her hand. "Not of our godsdamn mating! By the gods we are equals, and that is why I won't return to you. You act like this is a tantrum I'm throwing, but I am to the point that I would rather risk going feral than continue this way, Ronald. You placate me. You put in the minimum effort and I am always an afterthought!"

"It's not a bad idea that he's here for the meeting, but he won't have anything useful to interject," Iolas hedged. "I would suggest you put a barrier over him and let him see it all. Let him understand how many are of the same opinion or our reactions to whatever happened now."

"I agree," Neldor and Taeral said.

"So be it," I sighed, doing it and trapping Von Thann.

Which he didn't like and shot me a look that I would regret what I'd done.

I simply shook my head. Every time I thought we made some progress with the fool or he understood his position, it was wiped away once he was left alone again to bathe in his own narcissism.

"You're a fool," King Xavier warned, moving into Ronald's view. "She is about to become the Queen of Fairie and you're looking down on her? I'd smack you into place if you dared to look at my mate with any sort of retribution. You cannot move past her being the unknown you thought you had some sort of leverage or control over."

"No, he really cannot," I agreed with a tired sigh. I glanced around. "And we're at a boiling point with this, and we don't know how to handle the situation without killing him when he won't see us as anything but kids. So thank you for coming to help."

Izzy waved in people with food and they started setting it all up. She demanded to come as my moral support and advocate even if Iolas was there as my godparent.

We couldn't have Lageos there. If he learned there was even a possibility of an issue with Von Thann still, he'd kill him.

Taeral and Stefanie were there with Neldor.

Anya and Edelman supporting Julian.

Claudia and Geiger were sitting in and for Darby.

And of course, Hudson's parents.

"Okay, let's start at the beginning," I sighed… But then didn't really know where that actually was. Then I glanced at Sasha.

She nodded. "After you learned you could have children, I butted in and made it clear that you needed to make certain statements and lines clear before others did." She told everyone the quick conversation.

"From there, we had a discussion," Julian added, pointing to the five of us in turn. "Plus, Darby."

"Just assume Darby is included in everything we're discussing because he was," I clarified. "And we were all on the same page."

"Mostly," Neldor argued, sighing when I gave him a look to shut it. "No, this is the time to lay it all out and settle this once and for all."

I shot Lucca a guilty look and nodded. "So be it.

He told everyone about what we discussed and how he even went with others to talk to the Von Thanns and laid it out for them. But then he told the truth about what happened after and how he privately promised that Ronald Von Thann was voted off the island as much as Mary was to him.

"Tams?" Lucca whispered. He sighed when I didn't answer. "I'm not mad. I just want to hear it from you."

"The idea he will ever be around my children makes me shiver," I finally admitted. "I won't ever let him around them without me being there. No weekends visiting the grandparents—none of it. I can't. I just—I'm not able to ever allow that."

He stood and came over to me, pulling out my chair and cupping my cheek. "Talk to me, cream puff. I thought we were—"

"There are some things that just can't be moved on from, Lucca," I rasped. "I'm careful with people's thoughts and do my best to not hold them against them. I am. I really am."

"I know," he agreed.

I jumped to my feet. "He's not even fucking sorry. He's glad things worked out. He's sorry he acted the way he did because of the turmoil it brought to his life. He's not sorry how he treated me. He doesn't think it was wrong . It grates on me every fucking day that he has never been punished for wanting to breed me .

"Pushing that in the background. It wasn't just one statement, Lucca. Or even a few behind closed doors. Oh no, he was lining up allies who would be on his side when it came out that I was a fairy. He was perfecting his idea of a lottery system he would be in control of. Picking who he thought would be best to impregnate me and then take my children ."

"In what world could you ever think she would allow that man near her children especially when he won't respect the children from her other matings when he will only recognize yours as the real one?" Stefanie interjected.

I shot her maybe the most grateful look I ever had. She perfectly put into words what I was feeling.

"Why didn't you tell me this?" Lucca whispered, reaching for me.

I dodged so the chair was between us. "Because you love the asshole and I—we…" I shook my head. "Hey, Lucca, wanna get back together but PS, I want your dad dead or locked away for years at least until he finally gets it through his head how wrong he was, and I worry every fucking day he's going to ruin our lives and hurt one of my children and then I have to kill him?"

Yeah, that sounded like an awesome thing to say.

"For the record, all of Faerie is upset he hasn't been punished," Taeral interjected. "And it's clear that you are the one our citizens hope the princess does not end up with. Over a vampire which I never thought would happen, but over half have accepted Darby because they've seen his love for Tamsin. Most see you picking your family over her."

"We're greatly concerned about that sentiment and then you announcing you still want to be Alpha," Stefanie added. "Now your father is picking up where everything left off to train you under his wing as if nothing happened. Sending you schedules and trying to include you in his meetings. If there was ever anyone we hope you don't become a leader like—it's him."

Damn. Like… Dayumn .

Which was why it was a good idea to bring in others.

"I didn't know that," I admitted.

"You tend to put your blinders on about public opinion," Stefanie chuckled.

"Yeah, well, fairies are a bit too harshly critical and fickle, so it changes faster than I can keep up with," I grumbled.

"Back to the facts," Julian interjected, clearing his throat. "We all agreed the Vogels would have grandparent rights and whatever over any children we all had. We all wanted my mother cut off and handled. And we said very, very limited anything with Lucca's parents and never alone. Lucca agreed as well."

"And if I wasn't with my mate?" Mrs. Von Thann asked quietly, flinching when none of us immediately replied. "I see."

"There are a lot of questionable things Lucca's dad did before Tamsin even and his controlling, manipulative nature that you allowed that I've witnessed over the years that I would have an issue allowing our children alone with you," Hudson said, and I was so impressed that he could. "For now at least, and we're not having them anytime soon."

"Tamsin?" Mrs. Von Thann whispered.

I opened my mouth but then closed it before plopping back in my seat. "I don't think it's that simple of if I trust you." I glanced at Iolas. "Would Mom have left me alone with—"

"Not a fucking chance in either world," Iolas said firmly. "Excuse the pun, but if you think a mama bear is protective of their children, that's mild compared to a royal fairy."

"Agreed," Neldor chuckled. "And I was just a useless boy." He nodded, understanding where my head was. "Taeral was the only person besides my mother or father who was allowed ‘alone' with me, and that meant guards always at the castle around us. If we left the castle, we had at least two squads. You cannot fight a fairy who might try to abduct our child."

"That makes more sense, yes, of course," Mrs. Von Thann accepted. "But if I wanted to take them shopping or to lunch with guards? Is that off the table because of what my mate—and I by not stopping it—has done?"

"No, but I think you need some counseling to understand how controlling he's been," I said gently. "You are a strong, wonderful woman who used your power to help women and stand up when you could." I gestured to where Ronald was and the fact he snuck into the meeting. "But I think you need to understand you were abused more than you realize."

"I have concerns because I don't know you well at all," Julian interjected. "I think that's my main issue. And while Lucca has become a much better man, both of your sons are not… Your daughters seem lovely and have their heads on straight. I'm assuming that's more from you."

"If I was with her?" Sasha hedged.

Mrs. Von Thann's eyes filled with tears when it was clear none of us would have any issues then. But she accepted that and her part in all of this unlike her mate.

Then we told them the rest including my threatening Ronald. We all looked at Lucca then making it clear it was time to tell us what happened with his dad.

And he got squirrelly.

"I can't hear it or I'll kill him," I mumbled before putting the rune on me to deafen everything. I focused on the food but then jumped a few minutes later when Hudson was out of his seat and launching at the barrier I had over Ronald.

And Xavier had done the same, leaping over the table and landing on the barrier looking like he was shifting.

"That bad, huh?" I chuckled darkly. I might have said more, but Lucca's mom looked destroyed. She had her hand over her face and was quietly sobbing.

Shit.

But that affected Ronald. He looked like he'd been kicked in the nuts and was sorry.

I took off the rune and stood, flinching when I saw the death in the eyes of all fairies there—actually not just them. Even Izzy looked like she was thinking of how to sneak weapons around Ronald so she could take him out.

Yeah, I'd kill him on accident maybe if I heard. Seriously.

"My grandchildren will not be pawns for you, bear," Xavier seethed, banging on the barrier even if he knew he had no chance of bringing it down. "Why can you not see people instead of things for you to control unless they're fucking bears?"

Was that really the issue or disconnect? More than his sexism? He was racist for species?

"You can never support him to be on his council again, Your Highness," Stefanie said firmly. "He hasn't repented and—it's vile. He only cares for bears, and that's not the future we want."

"He needs to step down as Alpha," Sasha declared, her voice shaky. She nodded when I glanced at her with shock. "That is the crux of the problem. He is Alpha. He is boss. He is the authority. He should have had that stripped from him after all he did, but he started to right his course. He is backsliding and letting power go to his head all over again!"

"I agree," Mrs. Von Thann whispered as people started debating. Her voice, so soft and beaten down, cut through the chatter more than yelling could have. "I will be the proxy or Alpha regent—whatever the term—until Lucca is ready in a few years. And Ronald should spend that time in prison." She quickly wiped tears and looked at me, unable to say more.

But I knew what she wanted. I nodded. "Not the prison in Faerie where shifters aren't allowed to let their animals out."

"I know I shouldn't ask it, but I do," she whispered, hanging her head in shame. "I still have hope the man I mated will come back to me instead of this warped version of him he is now. I want the miracle Mary Craftsman had of finding herself again, but I know in my soul he will be the man he should be then. Please, he could go feral not shifting there."

"We never allow it to get to that point," Taeral said gently. "Shifters aren't worse after our prisons than before. They simply don't have the freedom to shift at will and as often as they want."

"We find it a more effective punishment than longer sentences because, as you know with your own bear, you'd do almost anything to give her what she needs and her freedom," Stefanie added. "The human side of them did the wrong, but their animal suffers because of it. It actually makes deep reflection a priority. We've only had one go feral, and that was because a mate died."

Taeral nodded. "It was unfortunate, but the pack was so upset with us for locking up one of theirs that they didn't tell us and he knew the next time he shifted. He didn't get to say goodbye—which we would have allowed—it was a mess. The wolf and man were lost after that."

Meaning it worked. "Let's try it for two months the way fairies know, and Lucca can be his advocate and monitor the situation." I glanced at Taeral. "We've had other Alphas?"

Taeral and Stefanie nodded, Stefanie answering. "It's normally who we have to come arrest because we are the only ones who can. They benefit the most from immediately being cut off, and—they are never a person but Alpha and all their responsibilities. We have the best success rate even if they normally don't go back to the same pack, but live more solo lives."

Better than being dead.

Though looking over at Ronald, I wasn't sure he'd say the same.