Chapter Two

Bursts of fiery golds, blazing reds, and sparkling blues light up the night sky. Each thundering BOOM echoes in my ears, but it drowns out the oppressive feeling in my chest, the fireworks doing their job of serving as a distraction.

I lean back on my hands, the feel of slate smooth and warm beneath my fingers. I'd chosen to sit and watch the fireworks from the town's Summer Solstice Party atop my roof, rather than accompany my parents to the celebration. Being around people smiling and laughing is not something I'm in the mood for.

A warm breeze caresses the back of my neck, sifting through my hair. It creeps beneath my white linen sundress and tickles my legs. I glance down at my feet, my toes painted a shimmering aquamarine color, one I picked because I know she would have chosen it for herself.

Liv.

A rattled sigh escapes my lips, and I draw my gaze back up to the night sky just as another burst of color illuminates the blanket of twilight. It explodes in the shape of a star, then bits and pieces shower down until the sparks disappear into the night.

"That one might be my favorite," a familiar, smooth voice comments.

My spine stiffens as that voice settles upon my skin, nearly causing my heart to stop beating. I close my eyes and take a deep breath.

Gods, how I've missed that voice.

I turn my neck, the sight of him leaving me breathless. The early summer sun has deepened the bronze of his skin. His eyes, like shots of whiskey, seem to shimmer every time the sky brightens with another colorful explosion. His ink-black hair begs to have my fingers tangled in it, with long tendrils curling behind his ears and at the nape of his neck.

"How long have you been standing there?" I will my voice to remain steady, but Nick does the one thing that has always broken my resolve: He smiles.

"Not that long."

He was never a good liar .

Slowly I stand, attempting to keep the sundress from riding any higher than where it already rests at my mid-thigh. But the angle of the roof thwarts my plans to stand gracefully, and I lose my footing, nearly stumbling forward. Between one blink and the next, Nick is there, catching me around my waist. I crash into the hard muscle of his chest, forced to breathe in the intoxicating scent of cedarwood and vanilla that I've spent the last few months trying to forget.

Tentatively, I let my eyes find his, knowing full well what a mistake I'm making. Devastation and desperation engulf his amber eyes.

Silence stretches between us, and I nearly lose myself to the feel of his hands at my waist, my brain conjuring up all the moments of his lips on mine and against my skin.

It's been nearly three months since I've been this close to him. I've done a stupendous job of avoiding him.

I swallow roughly. "Let's go inside." I slip out of his grasp, my body screaming at the loss of contact. I make my way towards an open window and climb through, backing away quickly so Nick can enter. He slides his lithe body through effortlessly, his mouth kicking up at the corners as he takes in the decor of my room.

If I were a normal girl, I'd be nervous as the boy I loved stood in my bedroom, scrutinizing my Sailor Moon posters, chuckling at the sight of my stuffed animals that even at nineteen years old, I refuse to part with, especially my stuffed version of Gandalf. But all it does is feed my grief. All I want is for Nick to see this side of me, the girl that I was - that I am - away from Alystair. The girl apart from the monster. But what good will that do? I need him to stay away from me, a fact that buried itself deep under my selfish impulse to feel his hands on me once more.

"Why are you here, Nick?"

He turns from my bed, raising a brow at the sharpness of my tone. Nick reaches into the pocket of his black shorts as he walks toward me and pulls out a small white box with a blue bow on it. "Happy Birthday."

I let my fingers dance on the surface of the box before I take it from him. "How…" I shake my head, a sad smile curving my lips. "Liv."

As I tug at the blue ribbon, memories of a time not so long ago surface, one that involves Nick and Rocky Road ice cream. It was Liv who had told Nick my favorite ice cream flavor, just as I'm sure it was Liv who told Nick my birthdate.

Opening the box reveals two stunning silver hair combs decorated with freshwater pearls. More memories come unbidden, bombarding me like gunfire. A satin blindfold. A monster boy. A torn gown. Bloody, bare flesh…

I snap the box closed.

"You left them in my room that night." His voice drops, no doubt his own memories resurfacing of that night.

I shove the box back in his hands, avoiding his eyes. "You can have them back. I don't want them."

A low growl causes me to look at him, his eyes blazing with fury. He steps into me and brings his face so close to mine, every exhale of his breath tickles my skin.

"I'm done playing your games, Rhi."

I harden my stare and absently reach for the pendant. "I'm not playing games, Nick."

Nick's eyes fall to the hollow of my throat. His fingers settle over mine. "Then why do you still wear the necklace I gave you?"

Shit.

A victorious smile graces his lips. He steps closer. "Because you still love me."

I step back, still toying with the pendant. "I don't -"

In the span of a breath, Nick closes the space between us. My back hits the wall.

"Stop lying." His eyes continue to burn. His voice is heavy with frustration, but I hear the soft plea underneath.

It's the underlying gentleness that weakens my resolve. The desperation. I've put him through such agony, and it shatters my soul to know how much I've hurt him. I want to wrap my arms around him, draw him into me. Tell him I've never loved anyone but him and never will. But if I do, it will kill him, and seeing him in pain and alive, no matter how much it makes my heart cleave in two, is better than having him ripped from me eternally. A fact that I have to remind myself over and over again.

"I'm not lying."

"Then say it," he taunts, "and mean it."

I know what he wants me to say: I don't love you. I said it once. Months ago. It took every ounce of my willpower to tell that lie without crumbling, but I did it. I can do it again.

Yet my traitorous tongue won't form the words this time, like it's too exhausted from being the bearer of all my lies.

"Get the fuck out of my room, Nick," I snarl. I attempt to push past him, but he cages me between himself and the wall, his palms pressing flat on either side of my head. His forearms nearly graze my cheeks, and I glimpse dark ink peaking below the sleeve on his left bicep, wrapping itself around the bronzed, corded muscle.

A tattoo?

"Make me," he challenges.

I feel the rise and fall of his chest against mine, and I lift my gaze, finding triumph brewing in his eyes. The authority in his tone provokes the Scylla, and the three snake-like beasts hiss gleefully, gearing for a fight. I give in to them, if only to get Nick to take a hint and get as far away from me as possible.

My claws unfurl, sharp, curved, and long, and I take a vicious swipe at his cheek. His head whips to the side. Four long scratches bloom on his skin, blood trickling from the wounds.

My heart seizes in seeing the wounds, knowing that I harmed him, and it takes every ounce of my self-control not to take his face in my hands and lick the blood away.

Nick turns his head in a slow, reptilian manner, amber eyes glistening with undiluted rage. He roughly grabs my throat, applying just enough pressure to threaten without cutting off my entire air supply. His other hand goes to my waist, sharp claws digging into my skin as he pins me against the wall. And though there was hardly any space between us before, somehow, Nick feels even closer, our bodies pressed so tightly together I can't tell where one of us starts and the other begins.

My heart quickens at the heated fury radiating from his body. I squirm beneath his hands, which only results in him tightening his grip. A low, inhuman growl escapes his lips. I can't help but wonder if my actions severed the tether he keeps on the monster buried beneath his skin, and panic flares in my chest for a moment as my memory dredges up depthless black eyes and a mouth that could devour me whole.

Nick's nostrils flare, no doubt scenting the fear coating my skin like a cloying perfume. His mouth curves into a wicked grin, and anger replaces my panic at the thought of him getting satisfaction from my fear.

"Go for it," I challenge, my voice edged in steel.

The grin turns into a frown. Blood leaks from the wounds on his face even as they heal at a rapid pace. His amber eyes are ravenous, his beauty brutal. And suddenly, skin painted in blood and Nick's hands pressing me against the wall and the words I just spoke are all too familiar.

That night.

Nick's lips crash into mine. He releases my throat, grabbing a fistful of my hair. His tongue snakes into my mouth, and I open eagerly for him, tasting the desperation mixed with relief in each stroke. I wrap my hands around the back of his neck, groaning at the feel of his luscious dark curls beneath my fingers.

Stop this, my brain screams. Yet my heart flutters rapidly, each beat pulsing against my chest, defying my brain as it assures me this is all so right.

And it feels right. Perfect. The way his heart beats in conjunction with my own. The way his claws settle into the curve of my waist. The way his lips caress mine in a delicious rhythm.

My breath hitches as Nick's now clawless fingers skim the hem of my dress, pushing the material higher. His hands come underneath my thighs, hoisting me up as I wrap my legs around him. Nick lets out a stifled groan and tears me from the wall. He backpedals, my legs still secured around his waist, until he lowers himself onto my bed. I straddle him, my dress bunched around my hips while his hands stroke the line of my underwear beneath. My own hands are frenzied, roaming through his hair, caressing his face, gripping his shoulders. I pull back only to catch my breath, deciding at this moment, damn it all to hell.

Nick pushes a curtain of my hair from my face, tucking it behind my ear. His knuckles brush against my cheekbone, and my eyes flutter closed.

"Rhi," he grinds out, and there's no need for him to say anything else. Because I know. I know. How did I ever imagine I could keep away from him? That I could do without his smile, his laugh, his frustrating ability to be rational in the face of my impulsiveness. But most of all, how could I live without the boy who allowed me to be so unapologetically myself? And then I realize: being without him would be like searching for light in a starless sky. I'd be lost in a void of darkness.

My lips part, ready to give in, ready to tell him everything. His amber eyes brighten like they've been struck with gold lightning. He knows. I can feel the tension leave his body, hear his breath shudder with long awaited relief.

And then everything shifts. Nick's eyes dart to the side. He tilts his head as though he's listening to a sound only he can hear. Except, I hear it, too. Footsteps. Too faint to be detected by human ears. Nick is up and at the window in the span of a heartbeat, somehow setting me down on my feet with ease. He reaches through the open window and hauls a familiar body through.

"Nick!" I scream as he grabs Jesse by the throat and shoves him against the wall.

"Get the fuck off me!" Jesse chokes out, attempting to pry Nick's unrelenting fingers from his neck.

I run over to Nick, pulling at his forearm. "Let him go!"

Nick slowly turns his head towards me, nostrils flaring. Black encroaches his gilded eyes. The hairs on my arms prickle, terror coursing through me as I glimpse the monster beneath his skin.

Jesse continues to struggle against Nick's grip, his face turning an alarming shade of tomato.

"Nick," I say softly, placing my shaking palms on his arm. "Please."

Still holding my stare, Nick splays his fingers wide, and Jesse sinks to the floor, sucking in mouthfuls of air.

I crouch beside him, taking his face into my hands. "Jesse, look at me. Are you okay?"

Jesse looks from me to Nick and nods slowly, massaging his neck as he stands upright.

"What the fuck is his problem?" Jesse rasps in a voice like he's swallowed sand.

Nick's entire demeanor has transformed. He stands with his hands in his pockets, shoulders drawn back and chest broad, looking wholly unbothered, like he didn't just choke another person within an inch of his life.

"So, this is Jesse, " Nick says, his voice venomous. "I've heard so much about you. "

Jesse's eyes narrow, a muscle ticking in his jaw. For all his earlier fear when Nick attacked him, not a shred of it appears now. "Really? Because I haven't heard a fucking thing about you."

That wipes the sardonic smirk off Nick's face. His features twist into something that doesn't appear fully human.

Shit.

"What's he doing here, Rhi?" Nick asks a simple question, but there is a quiet rage simmering beneath his skin.

"I…" I look at Jesse, my hands finding my pendant. I don't know how to answer that.

Jesse searches my face. "I came to see if you wanted to go to the Town's Solstice party with me." The confusion in his features melts into realization, the realization giving way to anger as heat flares in his golden-brown eyes. "But I can see that you're busy." He gestures to the rumpled comforter atop the bed in between Nick and I. My face burns as I pull my dress down from where it remains bunched around the tops of my thighs.

Jesse heads towards my bedroom door and flashes me one more considering look. This one is more wounded than angry, and my chest burns with shame.

"Jesse, wait- "

"It's ok, Rhi." His eyes bounce from Nick to me, before falling to the pendant at my throat. "I'm guessing he's the friend who gave you that."

A mirthless chuckle sounds from Nick. " Friend ?"

I wince, turning to face Nick, but he's already moving towards the door where Jesse stands, now looking bewildered.

"You should stay," Nick says to Jesse. He darts a swift and brutal glare at me. "I'm done here."

Three words have never sounded so gut-wrenching. Even telling Nick I didn't love him doesn't compare to the way I feel now, because at least when those words came from my lips, I hadn't meant them.

Nick sounds like he means every last fucking one, and they are like three separate stab wounds to my heart.

Something inside me snaps, like the unsettled crackling in the air before lightning strikes. I have been in agony for months over my decision to leave Nick for his own protection, but I suppose that because it was my choice, I always had the power to change that. To go back to him. I always had the chess pieces in my hand, ready to play them how I wanted. But now, Nick stole that from me, taking that power and those pieces to play how he wants.

And I don't like that at all .

"Maybe next time you can be normal and use the fucking front door!" I scream at Jesse or Nick, I'm not sure.

Jesse flinches, but Nick merely grins, as though he knows he's gotten under my skin. As though he knows he's won. He reaches past Jesse and grabs the doorknob. "Well, then let me oblige you by exiting through the ‘fucking front door.'"

I stare at Nick's back as he leaves. Time slows as I take in his broad shoulders. The soft, dark curls at the nape of his neck. The veins pulsing in his forearms, as though straining against something. The hint of dark ink peeking below the sleeve of his shirt. My chest rises and falls in a slow, steady rhythm. I open my mouth, my heart begging my brain to cooperate and say something. Anything.

Don't leave.

Come back.

I need you.

I love you.

But the door closes with a soft click, and Nick is gone.