Chapter Nine

The frigid grip tightens, stealing the breath from my lungs. My eyes observe the grotesque gash across her throat. Blood still stains the front of her shirt, the copper scent of it as fresh as the day it happened. I shut my eyes, only for my brain to conjure the image of Leviathan's tale swiping her neck and her body crumpling to the floor in a pool of scarlet.

I wrench them open, finding Kassi still before me with my wrist in her grasp, just like the day in Eastbourne's basement. Only this time, her dark eyes are fragmented in red veins, wild with malice, and her mouth is curved in the most vicious sneer.

She yanks me toward her, and my nostrils flood with the ripe smell of decay. " He's not what he says he is." Her voice is like I remembered - yet not quite. Malevolence lurks beneath her tone.

Kassi smiles then - a mouthful of jagged, crude fangs - and a black tongue protrudes toward her chin as she laughs: a wet, gurgling sound that spills more blood from the serrated flesh at her throat.

Just like that day in the basement, I yank my wrist from her grip and run. My feet barely touch the steps as I take them two at a time, knocking into another student descending.

"Hey!" he shouts as he drops several books, but I don't stop. I don't even stop when my acute vision spots Nick's head rise from his work, eyes narrowed on me in concern or aggravation - I'm not sure. I continue to run out the doors and stop for nothing and no one until I'm back in my dorm room, panting heavily.

Had Kassi appeared to me as a Shade? I was told last year not all monsters can see Shades. Kassi was able to because she was an Oracle, and if that is what a Shade looks like, no wonder Kassi was so withdrawn. How petrifying to have to go about your day, wondering if you are going to be terrorized by a gruesome specter.

Still, I recall the two occurrences where Kassi told me she'd seen a Shade: one was Amanda Reynolds, one of Leviathan's victims, and the other had been Liv. Yet, Kassi hadn't seemed perturbed by either, unless that's because she'd been so used to seeing Shades.

I tip my head back against the door and replay the horrifying encounter. Her chilling voice echoes in mind: He's not what he says he is.

My head whips forward with a sudden rush of familiarity. Kassi, the real Kassi, had said that to me once before, when something otherworldly overcame her. After discovering Josh was actually Leviathan, I assumed that's what she'd meant. But here I am again, months later, receiving the same message. As much as I don't want to accept it, my heart must finally relent to the fact that she'd been referring to Nick all along.

Don't you know who he truly is? Leviathan had taunted me with the knowledge that Nick wasn't truthful about his identity, which, deep down, I had known from the moment he refused to tell Lyncus his real name. My mind flips through memories like a Rolodex, drawing forth all the moments I'd ask him for the truth, for even just one glimpse of the man behind those gilded eyes. And what had he said when I had asked, who are you, Nicholas Cervallos?

I'm yours.

Tears fall freely as I yank the pendant, ready to rip it from my throat. The Scylla hisses in warning, and I pause, though I don't relinquish my hold. Instead, my fingers trace the familiar gemstones, their positions I know by heart. A pearl sits at the apex. My finger falls to the left, stroking the alexandrite while my thumb caresses the moonstone nestled directly across from it.

Just promise me you will never take it off.

I close my eyes, feeling his warm lips at the hollow of my throat. Promise.

For what? What fucking promises had he kept? Maybe if he had been truthful with me, it would be easier to protect him. Maybe I wouldn't have had to go to the lengths I have of destroying myself for him.

You can't love him. It will destroy you both. Kieran's words. It's as though my brain has decided to inflict its own sadistic torture, punishing me with all the things I ignored, all the words I dismissed that inevitably would come back to haunt me.

My grip on the pendant tightens. I pull, the delicate chain straining against my neck.

The three snake heads snarl, and I'm surprised the third one has finally decided to join the party. "This is what it takes to get your attention, is it?"

Three mouthfuls of fangs are visible in my mind's eye.

Promise. The low baritone voice of Nick's is clear.

I pull harder. The Scylla gnashes its jaws.

Promise. I feel a brush of air in my ear .

The chain is pulled taut, seconds from snapping.

Prom-

My hand clasps around the pendant, now free from my throat. The broken strands of the gold chain hang limply on either side of my palm. I release a shuddering breath.

If I have to break to keep him alive, then it's only fair I break something of his in return.

Zo returns from dinner to find me trembling beneath my covers.

"Rhi! What's wrong?" Her hand peels back the comforter, exposing my swollen, red-rimmed eyes and tear-streaked face. "What happened?"

"I think I saw a Shade."

Onyx brows draw together in confusion. "Are you sure? What did it look like?"

I blow out a shaky breath. "It was Kassi. She looked… horrifying. " I shudder and curl deeper into a fetal position. "Her throat was slit and dripping blood. Her fangs were cracked and riddled with decay." I lick my dry lips. "She attacked me, Zo."

Zo rears back in shock.

"She clawed at me like an animal. I felt my skin tearing beneath her hands, but once she was done, there wasn't anything left behind."

Unease twists her features. "Did she say anything to you?"

"‘He's not what he says he is.'"

"Rhi," Zo holds her palms out for me to grab. Hesitantly, I place my hands in hers and allow her to help me sit up. "That wasn't a Shade."

I pull my hands away. "What do you mean?"

"What you saw was a Harbinger, a demon cursed as a phantom. They act as messengers and deliver warnings." Her eyes narrow into dark slits. "Sometimes threats, usually in the form of attacking their victims."

He's not what he says he is. "Kassi gave me that warning when she was alive, though. I thought she'd meant Leviathan."

Zo shakes her head. "Obviously not." Her attention zeros in on the empty space at my throat. "Where is your necklace?"

I avert my gaze. "I took it off."

" Why? "

My eyes shoot to hers. "Because I'm fucking tired , Zo. I'm tired of being the only one keeping promises. I'm tired of all his fucking secrets. I-" I stutter, choking back a sob. "Most of all, I'm tired of pretending my heart doesn't shatter every time I so much as hear his fucking name. "

Zo takes my hands, gently this time, her eyes settling on me with compassion. "There's more to the story of why you broke up with him, isn't there?"

My silence is my confirmation.

"Rhi," she leans in, "are you in danger?"

I sniff. "No."

"Is Nick?"

Gods, how can I tell her the truth? Yet, the more I don't say, the more I can see those intelligent eyes of hers alive with discernment.

"How can we help him?" she asks.

I chuckle darkly at that and withdraw my hands.

"Rhi, I'm serious. If there's anyway we can help-"

"You have to kill me." I meet her bewildered stare. Her mouth parts, releasing the softest gasp.

"What are you talking about?"

"You want to help him?" My gaze hardens. "Then that's what you have to do: kill me. " I'm the danger, Zo. I kill him."

She shakes her head in disbelief, her many bracelets jangling with the movement. "No, that's not- "

I grip Zo by the shoulders. "It's true. Kassi told me before she died. It's part of Nick's prophecy. The Moirai confirmed it: Nick is going to die, and I'm going to kill him."

Zo breaks from my hold and paces the length of our small room, her head moving back and forth every now and then. I know she's running scenarios through her brain, the same way I do, only this time, she's not going to come up with a solution.

She pauses and catches my stare, her face wrought with worry. My stomach flips and drops as I wonder if telling her was the right choice. After all, Nick is like a brother to her. Perhaps she'll tell Scar and Astrid, and they'll all decide the best thing to do is -

"Oh, Rhi." Zo's body crashes into mine as she wraps me in a tight embrace, launching me from my seated position. She pulls back, but still keeps her hands on my arms. "We're going to figure this out."

I release a relieved breath, expelling months of weighted guilt and sorrow with it. "How?"

She shrugs as though the answer is simple. "By doing what we always do and sticking together."

I bite my lower lip. "Are you going to tell Astrid and Scar?"

Her dark eyes roam my face for a moment before she says, "No. Though Scar absolutely will not hold it against you, the last thing we need is for her to worry, too. And Astrid doesn't keep secrets from Scar, so…"

I nod, understanding. "Ok."

Zo squeezes my arms tenderly. "I'm serious, Rhi. I'm going to help you. We're going to find out what the Harbinger wants, and we're going to find a way to keep Nick safe."

Though her voice is hopeful, her eyes convey an entirely different truth, one that, despite how many times I've tried, I cannot escape. It doesn't matter what we do. How hard we fight. Or how much I love him.

Nick is going to die.

"Welcome back," Wilde paces the front of the class the next morning, her hands clasped behind her. As usual, she scrutinizes the front row, glossing over Astrid and me in her perusal.

"I trust everyone has completed the required summer reading."

Luckily, I had no compulsion to leave my room, save for when the girls showed up, so I got the reading done in record time. The rest of the class mumbles unenthusiastically, and Professor Wilde's signature sharp smile graces her face. Astrid glances at me warily, aware that seeing that particular smile means Wilde is about to unleash her brutal Socratic method.

"Last year, you all worked with simple, albeit effective, poisons. This year, we will take it a step further. In order to do that, you must understand the nature of what constitutes something as poisonous." She pauses, surveying the class once more. "Name a poisonous creature."

The entire class is silent, and then someone shouts from the back of the class: "Rhi Owens."

I stiffen as muffled laughter dances across my ears. Astrid whirls towards the voice, her sapphire eyes heated. Wilde stalks toward the back of the room, and I turn once she passes me. She stops at the last row, standing before a boy with copper hair I vaguely recognize.

"Silas," Wilde scolds. "Color me unsurprised that you are repeating my class. Again. It must run in the family."

A few sharp breaths echo about the room at Wilde's comment. My eyes widen as I take in his copper hair, more brown in tone than I remember his cousin having, whose eyes were a poison green, brighter than the deep sage ones that glare at me now .

"My advice," Professor Wilde continues, "is to focus on understanding your enemy, rather than poke fun at it, and you can start by reading the required text if you want to pass this class."

"I was right though, wasn't I?" Silas never breaks his glower, jutting his chin in my direction. "The bitch is poisonous."

"I'm going to fucking kill him," Astrid says under her breath.

"You're wrong, actually," Wilde says, startling Silas. He turns his attention to the Poisons Professor, cowering beneath whatever look she bestows upon him. "Rhiannon isn't poisonous." The classroom erupts into hushed whispers because, of course, they are probably just as surprised as Silas.

"Then what the fuck is she?" Silas asks in bewilderment.

Wilde straightens, her back still to me. Waiting.

"Venomous," I answer.

Wilde turns from Silas and makes her way toward the front of the classroom. "And what is the difference?"

"Yeah, what the fuck is the difference?" The animosity in Silas's eyes is a beast all its own.

I stand abruptly, knocking my chair to the side. Various gasps fill the space, and Astrid stares at me cautiously. "Venom is injected directly into the bloodstream by a bite or wound. Poison must be ingested or absorbed through the skin." I take a step towards him. "You know, like how your cousin, Kieran ," I sneer at his name, "created that half-ass poison in an attempt to kill Nick?"

Silas is up and out of his chair, meeting me with the same level of contempt. "Venomous. Poisonous. Who the fuck cares? The fact is that anyone that gets close to you dies. You are an infection. You. Are. Poison. "

My teeth sharpen, fangs dropping from my gums. My fingernails become black and curved points. "The only infection was massacred in his own cell, and you know what?" I bring my face to his, my saliva saturated with the flavor of almonds. "I wish I had fucking done it."

Silas lunges for my throat as Wilde yells, "Enough!" but her command isn't needed. Silas backs away quickly as well as half the class. I don't dare take my focus from Silas, who breathes heavily, eyes gleaming and vitriolic.

"Astrid," Wilde says, "put your gloves back on."

That pulls my attention to Astrid, who doesn't budge, holding her bare palms aloft. Her entire stance is rigid but predatory, ready to strike if needed.

I cut Silas with a searing glare. "My advice is you should learn from your cousin's mistakes. Fuck with us again, and I'll grant you the opportunity to find out just how venomous I am."

Lifting my chair upright, I nod once to Astrid, who puts her gloves back on with cool indifference, and takes her seat beside me. I glance at Wilde. Her lips are pressed tightly, as though she's fighting a smile.

"Everyone, please take your seats, and let's resume our discussion." She patiently waits as the class slowly takes their respective places at their desks. I don't miss the abundance of side-eye glimpses thrown my way, nor can I shake Silas' sharp glower cutting into my back.

"So, there you have it," Wilde continues in a matter-of-fact tone, any evidence of an almost brawl in her classroom dismissed. "The difference between venom and poison. We will continue our studies in identifying various poisons, but you should also be aware of venomous creatures."

Movement to my left draws my gaze. A girl with cropped, dark hair and a shimmering nose ring raises her hand.

"Yes?"

"Are there any other venomous monsters?" she asks, voice meek.

Wilde takes a deep inhale through her nose. "No. As far as we know, Scylla continues to be the only venomous monster in our myth."

Silence descends upon the class. Instead of feeling the singular, cutting glare of Silas, I suffocate under the weight of fifteen additional stares. I don't need to stare back to anticipate the look of unease on their faces. I'd already memorized it from the day I bit the same amount of students in Wilde's lab after she'd purposely poisoned them. It didn't matter that I had saved their lives. Despite that we're all monsters, one fact will always remain: I'm something never before seen. Something unpredictable. No one likes what they can't control, and that dislike eventually transforms into fear.

The notion of being ostracized by my peers for simply being what I am due to circumstances beyond my control churns my stomach acid to an uncomfortable state. I swallow roughly, wondering what I can do to prove to everyone that I'm not dangerous, and my desire has always been to help people. Still, what if I can't alleviate their trepidation? What if, despite all I do, being a Scylla only fosters further uncertainty and leads my peers to do the one thing I fought so hard against?

They fear me.

Let them. The intrusion in my mind is both foreign and familiar, yet its delivery is delicate. I jerk my head abruptly, causing Astrid to draw her brows together in concern. I shrug, waving her off, and bring my attention to Wilde as she continues her lesson. The usual commanding grace of her tone doesn't capture me, as I instead focus on that arcane voice.

Let them what?

My mind stills, awaiting an answer. I'm aware of the rigorous beating of my heart as I strain to hear that voice again. A few more moments pass, the only sound I hear is that of my own breath.

Then, in a voice like gentle poison, it answers: Let them fear you.