Chapter 19

CHAPTER NINETEEN

T he surge of anger she'd felt toward Merc earlier couldn't hold. When she reached the portal exit and saw him there, he sensed where her mind was. Rather than saying anything, he offered her a hand. When she took it, he pulled her to him and put his arms around her. And his wings.

She hadn't looked for tenderness from him, or compassion. He gave her both, plus a needed silence. When she finally drew back, she wiped at her face self-consciously. "Let's go."

She was braced for the usual alarming, organ-jarring portal experience, punctuated by another blood vomiting episode. She still didn't travel well on the longer jumps.

However, this time the transition was like stepping out of one room and into another. She looked at an open field around her. It was an unfamiliar place, but obviously far closer to the in-between space they'd just left.

"I can get us there without the longer portal trip," Merc told her. "If you will trust me to do so."

Mutely, she put her arms around his neck, and he hefted her up so she could wrap her legs over his hips. "It will be fast, but less jarring. Have you ever wanted to travel at the speed of a rocket ship?"

She tipped her head back up to look into his face. His close, intent face. Before she thought about what she was doing, she'd brushed her lips against his mouth. "Yes," she said simply.

He stared down at her.

"Oh. I—sorry. I didn't think. I know you don't kiss…women."

He didn't say anything. Instead, after a long moment, he cupped her head and brought her back to his mouth. His eyes stayed open, staring into hers.

Her heart pounded, her mind scrambled by the knowledge something momentous was about to happen. Or maybe it would just be a kiss. Nothing special. Because he had avoided the intimacy, any potency would simply be from the anticipation, the previous denial.

Yeah, right.

Slowly, her eyes dropped to half mast, then fully, a sound caught in her throat as he molded his mouth over hers, learning her shape. When he parted her lips, his arms tightened around her. His tongue came inside to explore the tender insides of her mouth, follow the length of her fangs, tease the tips. She shuddered, that sound becoming a moan.

She let him take the lead on the exploration, curbing her desire to do the same. For once, she surrendered without any resistance, telling him how much she fucking loved to be kissed by him.

Then she was in a tornado, spinning, shooting like a star—or a rocket. She was in his arms, held securely, her head tucked against his chest, the wind from his wings like ocean currents. Her mind couldn't hold onto anything but that kiss and the feel of his arms around her.

Just as she thought her internal organs were about to be squeezed to a pulp, and she'd need vampire healing ability to reinflate or reassemble them, he slowed down.

She didn't have the ability to turn her head to look below until they were gliding like a bird would, descending in lazy circles. "Oh," she said softly.

She was much higher than the altitude at which she flew the supply plane. Being in the thinner night air was a cool contrast to the heat of his arms around her.

But as they at last dropped below the clouds, she saw the island. Then the tiny silhouettes of lions prowling the savanna. A cougar in the mountain habitat, perched on a rock. From the angle of her head, Ruth imagined her glittering eyes were tracking their descent with curious interest. As they circled the island's perimeter, she saw the rehab area, the figures of the staff. With it being nighttime, her father was probably with them. Which reminded her she needed to announce their arrival.

Sgidoda, I'm arriving by air. With a guest. He's an angel. And an incubus.

The wordless mental acknowledgement included a rewarding deep pleasure that she was home. Two shots of it, her father's welcome reinforced by her mother's as he shared Ruth's arrival.

Her father's reaction to her announcement was in the mix as well. Though he didn't voice it, the emotion was easy enough to pick up, and made her smile.

An angel incubus. What the fuck?

By the time she directed Merc to touch down on a hill near the house, and they walked over that crest and down into the valley where her childhood home nested, her parents were on the porch.

She'd felt self-conscious about landing before them, wrapped around Merc. It didn't matter that they'd seen her in plenty of sexual situations with human servants. It wasn't about sex, but she wasn't going to dissect that right now.

Mal was sitting in his preferred chair, made of woven branches. Chumani had crafted plenty of them for the staff quarters and their home. Elisa was on the steps.

Ruth wasn't surprised that Mal had returned to the house to greet them personally. Hey, Da. Bringing a sex demon to the island. Is that cool?

She guessed every parent had to deal with who—and what—their offspring might bring home.

When Mal met them in the yard, Elisa was at his side, both of them studying Merc. His wings were folded along his back, the arches visible over his broad shoulders, the crossed tips brushing his calves. The moonlight made the white gleam and gave the black glimmers of silver, which touched his hair as well.

The incubus emanations were there, the sexual and more unsettling ones that alerted fight-or-flight instincts. She hadn't been able to have the talk with him yet, about toning that down.

When Mal angled himself so her mother was mostly behind him, she wished she'd thought to do that. Ruth put her hand on Merc's arm, a nonverbal reassurance to them. Her mother rallied quickly.

"A real angel," she murmured. "What a rare and fine thing that is."

"Part angel." Merc's attention covered her from head to toe, lingering on the canvas sneakers visible under the knee length hem of her skirt. Leopard faces were hand-painted on the shoes. Her dress was blue, with a satin ribbon edged scoop neckline. The color brought out the same hue in Elisa's eyes.

She and Mal were very hands-on with the never-ending sanctuary work, so she must have done a quick change before their arrival. Her thick hair was pulled up and clipped with a comb, curls falling to her shoulders.

Merc's scrutiny, coupled with the incubus vibes, started to cause a problem for Mal, but before Ruth could think how to defuse it, Merc spoke.

"Ruth has your physical features, but her mother's beauty comes from the inside and shines through. She also has her smile and voice." He extended a hand to Mal. "Thank you for allowing me to visit your island."

Ruth managed, barely, not to let her jaw hit the ground. Of course Merc knew the courtesies of the different races he encountered, but she'd yet to see him observe any of them.

Mal accepted the hand. The firm shake made it clear the two men were taking one another's measure. Ruth glanced at her mother, and saw a suppressed smile.

No way to deny it. She was witnessing the unpredictable power dynamics of a father-suitor encounter. Which made Ruth feel even more ridiculously self-conscious. She was glad Adan wasn't here to make fun of her.

"The invitation came from Ruth, but my children's guests are our guests," Mal said. "I need to finish the wellness evaluation of the rehabilitating cats. If you join me, you can see more of the sanctuary. We'll sit down to a meal afterward. Ruth, stay and help your mother."

Mal's gaze never left Merc. Merc held it long enough to make a point before he shifted his attention to Ruth. "Is that what you wish?" he asked her.

"Yes, that's fine." After a light touch of his arm, she moved to her father, and gave him a welcoming hug. "Please don't start a fight with him," she murmured. "He's still figuring us out."

Mal shot her one of his patented inscrutable looks that promised nothing, but his arms around her were strong. "It's good to have you home."

"You've barely had time to get used to me not being here."

Mal's gaze flickered, a mixed reaction which tightened her heart in her chest. He touched her face, caressing a strand of hair that had loosened from her braid, thanks to the wild flight with Merc. Then he moved away, jerking his head at Merc and leading the way to the Jeep.

Ruth managed what she hoped was an encouraging look at Merc. She'd never been so uncertain of what was going on or what she was supposed to do. Feeling this foolish could make her irritable, but that wouldn't help. Fortunately, it was balanced by another feeling, though one just as mystifying. She wanted him to meet her parents. She was glad to show him her home. Officially.

When they reached the Jeep, Merc spoke to her father, and Mal nodded. He got in and turned over the ignition. As he put it in gear and gassed it for the climb out of the valley, Merc waited a few seconds, then took to the air, following. Probably a good decision. If Merc stood in the back holding the bar so his wings weren't mashed against a car seat, Mal wouldn't appreciate having him so close behind him.

Merc flying was always something to see. "Hmm," her mother said. "Would that feeling be coming all from the incubus part of him?"

"You mean the continuous sex vibes? Part of it is. The other part is just him." Ruth gave her a nudge and a smile. "Just like Da. Part of it is the vampire, part of it is him."

Elisa grinned, looping her arm with Ruth's. "Don't worry about them. Your father hasn't murdered a guest yet."

"He did let the leopards chase that one vampire's servant up a tree."

"Because he wasn't listening to your father's direction. It solved the problem, and the vampire agreed the lesson was needed." Elisa's eyes twinkled. "The two of them will figure it out. Nothing is required from us."

Her mother's knack for reading her mind was still effective. "Why do I feel like it is?"

"Because you're not in control of the situation, and you dislike that feeling intensely. Most of the time." Elisa winked. "It's a bit of time until staff meal. I don't have to start the pastry rollout for the meat pies right away. Let me stage it, then we'll sit and you'll tell me how it's going."

As they went up the stairs, Elisa's questions prompted easy conversation about the Circus, allowing Ruth to stay away from the more intense elements for now. And yet, maybe because of the marking question, and all it meant, her mind landed on a topic her gut refused to let her leave alone. She needed to ask. There'd be no better time to broach it.

" Etsi …is Sgidoda disappointed…in how I am?"

It came out awkwardly, but she'd never thought about how she'd put the question out there.

Elisa had circled the kitchen island, an area big enough to allow her and the staff who rotated kitchen duty to work together. When the weather was rainy or there wasn't time for a meal at the picnic tables under the sprawling canopy of the oak tree in the yard, sometimes the staff grabbed a quick standing bite around it as well.

Ruth's question brought Elisa to a full stop. She pivoted, came back around the island and took Ruth's hands, pulling her onto a stool. Elisa faced her on the one next to it. Her blue eyes were somber, and she didn't immediately reply. No instant reassurances. It put an ache in Ruth's throat and dropped her stomach into her knees.

"He fears for you," Elisa said. "Deeply. Because he knows the vampire world. You should be asking him this yourself. His answer would bring ease to you both. But disappointed?"

Elisa's gaze brightened, bringing sunlight back to Ruth's heart, something her mother had always been able to do. She'd said that when she was nine. We don't need to see it. Mum gives us the sun, Adan.

"Never. You are him, Ruth, in so many ways. You carve your own path, no matter the obstacles."

Ruth gripped her mother's hands tighter. "I have to be sure. Are we talking about more than my…physical differences, with other vampires my age?"

Elisa's gaze softened. "We're talking about your desire to surrender to a Master worthy of the gift."

Ruth instinctively looked around her. "It's safe to say it here, just the two of us," Elisa assured her. "I wish you lived in a world where you didn't have to be that cautious. But maybe if it was handed to you, it wouldn't have the same value. Earning that gift, the ability to be who you are, openly, is important."

"So, even that, he's…okay with it?" The age-old desire for a parent's approval. Even when the "child" was over eighty years old.

"He fears what dangers that may bring to you. But when he looks at you and Adan, he knows you're exactly as God intended you to be. He's also glad he can't get gray hair, because his ‘would look like rain-pregnant clouds all the time.' Unquote."

Elisa sat back and patted her knee. "So tell me about your angel incubus. Or incubus angel."

"The proper order depends on the day," Ruth admitted wryly. "He's scary, Etsi . And wonderful. Wild like lashing rain and tornadoes and earthquakes that reshape the ground. He's fought his own darkness and won, even though he still deals with the distrust of those around him."

"Perhaps that's why he's met you. When you have someone who can reflect who you truly are by what they're willing to give you, it can change your world—and the world's view of you—in good ways."

Ruth paused. "Is Da…in your head right now? Hearing this conversation?"

Elisa's expression went soft. "Aye. I feel him when he's there, even if he doesn't say anything."

"Having a third mark, it helps a lot of things, doesn't it?"

"Yes, it does. If it's the right third mark."

"They think I should mark him."

Elisa's brows rose to her hairline. "Do they think that it will take? And why do they want you to do that?"

"They don't know. As to why…" Ruth explained the other side of her job, the more-than-a-security-detail things, with Clara, and the visit to Lady Kaela. When she was done, she was glad Mal was in Elisa's head, so she wouldn't have to explain that twice. She'd thought about skipping the attack by the two vampires, rationalizing that Adan might have already told them. Or would tell them. Then she realized it might help Merc's case with her father, so added it in.

Elisa immediately rose and put her arms around her. Ruth told herself she didn't need the reassurance, but the strength of her mother's embrace was a balm to the part of Ruth still a little raw over the experience.

When she drew back, Elisa dropped her voice to a humorous stage whisper, since they both knew Mal could hear her. "Well played, adding pieces to Merc's side of the board."

"I guess I wanted to offer definitive proof of what Marcellus and the others think. That Merc can protect me in the vampire world. But if I decide to do the marking, it won't be because of that. I'm not going to let fear make the decision for me."

"I'd expect nothing less of you. What is worrying your head about it?"

"I don't know what the shape of it will be. It won't be a traditional relationship like yours and Da's. He may not be with me all the time. He has other responsibilities. And we haven't known one another for long. Lady Yvette says that really doesn't matter, not when it comes to vampires and servants. When I look at you and Da, and other pairings, like Lady Lyssa and Jacob, or Cai and Rand, all the different ones we've met here who are…really close, most didn't know one another for long. It was circumstances that pointed them toward the binding."

"Yes." Memories crowded in behind Elisa's eyes, good and far more painful ones. Though mostly good.

"I guess if it turns out to be a mistake, he'd just go back to his life and me to mine. The vampire world has no hold on him. There aren't any repercussions, like a human servant a vampire wants to cut loose. Or who wants to be cut loose."

"Hmph."

Ruth snorted. "You're getting better at Da's cryptic grunt. The one that has all the ‘I am Groot' meanings."

Her mother understood the Guardians of the Galaxy reference, because Elisa liked movies and music. Though he would deny it, Ruth and Adan were sure that was why Mal had such a good generator for the house. He'd given Elisa her first record player in the 1950s. Over the years, he'd upgraded accordingly so she could enjoy each new decade of music—and then cinema.

Reliable wi-fi was a no-go on the island, thanks to all the magic in play, which suited Mal just fine. In his opinion, Cerberus had vomited cell phones straight up from the Underworld. Adan and Ruth had them; they just didn't work well on the island, if at all.

"He says Kohana taught him that grunt, and it's contagious." Elisa tapped Ruth's knee again. "The vampire-servant bond. Plenty of vampires think it can be defined, and every pairing will fit inside those boundaries. I admit, those boundaries, that definition, has worked reasonably well for the survival of the vampire world, and for many vampire-servant relationships. But there's no one set definition for it."

Elisa shrugged. "Lord Mason proposed a document on servants' rights, not only because of what his servant Jessica went through before she became his, but because of what he himself knows about it, how deep that relationship can go and what it affects."

"How do you feel about it, Etsi ? Do you think it should be passed?" It was the first time she'd ever asked her mother the question. With a spurt of shame, Ruth realized she'd never considered a human servant's input about it relevant. And most of the vampire world held the same opinion.

Elisa's expression became pensive. She pulled over a jar on the counter and lifted the lid. "Biscuit?"

Oatmeal raisin, one of her mother's specialties. Since it fell in the category of Kohana's cornbread, something she wanted far more of than she could have, Ruth shook her head. But that wasn't the only reason she refused it. She leaned forward, putting her hand over her mother's. "I've upset you, Mum. I'm sorry."

Elisa gave her a sad smile. "No, you haven't, love. You know, Adan calls me Elisa most of the time now. You remember to do it when we're around the vampire visitors who expect you to view me as a human servant more than as a mother. However, when we're alone, you always call me Mum or Etsi . You're protective in different ways. Adan is protecting my physical wellbeing; you're protecting my feelings."

" Etsi …"

Elisa shook her head, squeezed her hand. "Your father made sure you two always saw me as your mother first, his servant second. There are other human servant parents who aren't as fortunate. They're sent away soon after the babe is born, because it's the vampire parent's blood the newborn most needs. They aren't brought back until the child is fully bonded with the vampire parent, to ensure the human servant is always viewed the ‘proper' way."

"Oh, Mum. Da would never. Not in a million years."

"I know." Elisa's expression reflected the love and trust she had in her vampire Master. "When you're first together, learning one another, you have more fears and insecurities. It's a terrible thing, knowing your fate rests entirely in the hands of another, Ruth. Being a servant is an unimaginable act of faith in the vampire who binds you. Because only time will give you that knowledge of one another."

Ruth remembered when they'd learned the news about Lady Lyssa declaring her love for Jacob. They'd been visiting Lord Marshall. Elisa had risen from the floor where she'd been sitting, playing a game of chess with Matthew. She'd gone to Mal and done something peculiar. She'd knelt, kissed Mal's hand and rested her face against it. He'd bent over her and murmured something that had her fingers tightening around his calf. Words of reassurance…flavored with a sliver of hope.

"When I've thought about it, and I have, a great deal, I've realized I can't speak decisively on whether it should be passed or not. I made the decision I made, the leap of faith, for Mal. For my vampire, because that's the core of what makes the vampire-servant bond so strong."

Elisa shifted their grips, her hand tight on Ruth's. "I stood before him and said ‘I will belong to you' in every conceivable and inconceivable way, in a world many think makes it impossible for love to thrive between vampire and servant. But power inequities don't kill love. They might make them harder to understand for those who only focus on the inequity, but a flower can grow out of a crack in the sidewalk. Why wouldn't love exist in environments equally as challenging? Love doesn't fit in any box, or single way of thinking."

Her gaze had taken on an intensity Ruth had rarely seen, and she wondered if, wherever her father was, he'd stopped to give his servant's words his full attention. Elisa said them with such conviction, it was as if she was etching them on his heart, one letter at a time.

"Love has no boundaries, Ruth. None. No matter what laws are passed, for or against servants, no matter if no one ever says it out loud, the vampire world survives with the vital help of that vampire-servant bond, the strength, protection and connection it provides the vampire."

Nodding, the matter settled for herself, Elisa took a bite of her cookie. "When it's finally voted upon, it might well be a fine thing. I hope so. But for me, it will have no relevance. I have what I need. Now I just want you and Adan to find that kind of happiness. I think your brother has, with Catriona."

"I do, too. Though they're kind of sickening to watch together." Which wasn't at all true, but she had to be a sister first and foremost, rather than a female who adored seeing the tender bond between her brother and his delicate dryad. "Oh, and Etsi ? Whatever Adan calls you when he's around you, when he talks about you to me, or in his head, it's always Mum or Etsi ."

Elisa smiled and handed Ruth a piece of the cookie. "Eat a bit. Just because you can't have everything you wish of it, don't deny yourself something you want. Find a different way to appreciate it."

Ruth gave in, putting the piece of heaven in her mouth, flavored with brown sugar and cinnamon. As they chewed companionably together, she had another question for her mother. "What did it feel like? The third mark? I've asked Adan a lot of questions about his side of it. I could talk to Catriona, but Da is always saying you and I have a lot in common. So I thought, even though you're human…"

"My experience would be somewhat relevant." Elisa chuckled at Ruth's obvious discomfort. "Vampire superiority over humans is embedded in you, but I appreciate the efforts you and your brother have made to recognize it, even if you don't always resist it."

Before Ruth could object to that—or acknowledge it—Elisa's gaze turned thoughtful again. "Once it happened…I was never alone again. But it's terrifying, Ruth, because with the wrong Master, loneliness can take on a depth and pain even Hell cannot match. Be very sure before you take that step. But over the years, as I've watched vampires make right choices, wrong choices, I've decided it's like love itself. You take the leap and see where it takes you."

Elisa stroked Ruth's hair from her brow. "But no matter where that leap takes you, a chuisle mo chroí, remember we're here. You have a family. We're the net at the bottom. Always."

Merc noted that Mal seemed distracted as he went through the rehab wellness checks, though he answered whatever casual questions Merc posed about the fascinating process. Merc had cloaked his wings, deciding it was easier to present himself as a visitor of indeterminate origins. Even so, the other staff members maintained a wide berth. He wondered if Mal had requested that, or if it was the vibe he put off. He'd meant to tone it down around her parents, but something about meeting her father had made him…he was not going to use the word nervous, but the end result was he'd stuck with what he knew. Being intimidating.

He could have saved himself the effort, since the male was obviously Ruth's father. He didn't intimidate. And while Merc would have to be tortured to admit it, Mal could be pretty damn intimidating himself, with that steady stare and expressionless face.

It didn't stop Merc from asking the question he'd wanted to ask for a while. Having the staff members at a safe distance helped make that happen. "Why is she weaker than other vampires? She sleeps more often, and goes to bed earlier, gets up later, than the ones I know."

The male vampire turned to lock gazes with him. "You've done nothing to earn my trust, and yet you ask me questions like that."

Merc inclined his head. "My apologies. I intended no offense. I sought information because…I want to know more about her."

"Then you should ask her."

"It's a question that might hurt her, or make her uncomfortable. I prefer to avoid that."

That dark gaze could have shaved rock. Merc held fast against it, though not without unexpected effort. At length, the vampire male grunted and moved to the next enclosure. Pointedly without giving him an answer.

"It's not tall enough, Mal," one of his staff members said, pointing to the step ladder lying on the ground. "If we make a scaffold, we can get up there and repair it."

Merc noted this enclosure had netting over the top, twenty-plus feet above the ground. He expected the tear near the center was what the conversation was about.

The animals within, sleek golden cats with long ears and pointed faces, watched the gathering outside their enclosure with intense slanted eyes.

"I think we have this," Mal told his staff member. "Return the ladder to storage." As the man gave him a curious nod but headed off to perform the task, Merc noticed Mal was studying the space his wings inhabited, though the cloaking made them invisible. "Do you know how to mend a net?"

With the edge in his tone, he might as well have asked, "Can you walk and chew food at the same time?"

"You could direct me," Merc said evenly. "Why doesn't your injured tiger have a covering over his area?"

"Tigers aren't climbers or jumpers the way caracals are. Too heavy. They're the only cat species that likes to swim, though." Mal's eyes flickered. "Ruth learned many lessons here. Even the most powerful creature has an unexpected weakness. And the smallest can be more resourceful than expected."

"Her ability to keep her wits about her in the most terrifying of circumstances proves she learned those lessons well. But I think they worked with what was already there."

"Hmph." Mal picked up the coil of rope and snips next to the ladder and handed them to Merc. "Weave this through the torn opening," he pointed to it, "draw the hole closed, and knot it securely."

"You aren't concerned about your staff seeing my wings?"

"We've had Fae here."

Fine. if Mal wasn't worried about it, neither was Merc.

Merc let the cloaking vanish, aware of the staff's indrawn breaths, their sudden attention. Intrigued but not astonished. The unexpected was the expected thing around here. Well, except for one young male who had the air of a newer hire. He went stock still and watched Merc like he'd never seen such a sight before.

Merc took the rope and went aloft. With his dagger, he didn't need the snips. As he hovered above the torn spot, he was amused to see the caracals tracking him. "You will catch far more than you can handle with this bird," he informed them.

They didn't look convinced, but since he was outside the netting, they settled and watched as he followed Mal's direction to repair the opening. Mal handled other matters as Merc worked, but Merc was on his radar, because when he finished, Mal had returned. Merc waited until the male vampire gave him an approving nod. "That'll work."

When Merc landed, the newer staff member had drawn closer. He reached out toward Merc's wings, but Merc's warning hiss, the flash of sharp teeth, had him snapping to attention as if he'd been woken from a sound sleep.

"I wouldn't advise it," Merc said.

"My apologies, sir," the man said hastily. "I forgot myself."

"Don't let it happen again, Shane," Mal told him. "Many of our visitors are as dangerous as the cats."

"I know. I mean, I…thought I knew." Shane looked hard at Merc. "You just…it's a feeling…"

"I suggest suppressing it," Merc said.

The male offered another apologetic nod, almost a bow, and retreated, though his gaze kept stealing back to Merc.

Mal had watched the exchange with an impassive look. "I expect you have to deal with that at the Circus, too."

Merc chose to interpret the comment more narrowly. "I cloak the wings when I'm doing security work. But I allow the children to touch them during the Promenade, the aftershow."

"You like children."

Incubus energy had no effect on them until they passed puberty. So their reactions to him were honest. He liked that. "Yes. That male doesn't seem the same as your other staff members."

Mal led him toward the next enclosure. "He's a seasonal hire. Half Irish, half Cherokee. His mother is a second mark in Lord Marshall's household, our Florida overlord. He's studying to be a minister."

With Marcellus, even if they thought they'd never met an angel, some core part of a person's soul recognized him as such. As Ruth had when she first met the senior angel. They didn't have that issue with Merc. Or rather, they hadn't ever done so before.

The idea that they could, that the male might be picking that up from him… The thought was uncomfortable. Merc wasn't sure how to react to it. He put it aside, because he had more important things to pursue than whether or not Shane had actually detected the angel instead of the incubus blood.

Merc met Mal's gaze. "What would you ask of a man who wants to be with your daughter?"

The winged male was an unknown quantity, but Ruth had brought him here, and she had good judgment. Still, Mal wasn't going to abandon a father's automatic suspicion. Taking Merc with him to work the sanctuary was a way to gather evidence, for or against.

Throughout the tour, he'd been attentive, followed Mal's direction, and asked intelligent questions. Until he'd tried to pick Mal's brain about Ruth. But in fairness, Mal had poked him a couple times himself, to assess his temperament.

In Merc's question now, Mal heard an uncertainty he recognized. A male trying to figure out what a woman needed. Even if Ruth hadn't given him the heads up on it, Mal could tell that was still new territory for Merc.

While he wasn't going to make exploring that ground easier, he would be honest. Because the honest answer wasn't going to map things out any better for the male.

"That he cares about her wellbeing more than his own. That he sees her, sees who she is. And, if it is the best thing for her, even if it destroys him to do it, he will walk away from her."

Merc's jaw went tight, caught between annoyance and a deeper internal struggle. Mal had to hide an unexpected smile at the answer that reaction provided him. Even before Merc spoke and confirmed it.

"You think that's what would be best for her?"

"That's not for me to answer. That's for you and her. And truthfully, Merc? I have no concerns about Ruth choosing a male who's wrong for her. When it comes to her will and self-respect, she's as well armed as her mother and I could possibly wish."

After they finished up in the rehab area, Mal indicated they should head back to the house. This time Merc took the offer to ride in back, standing and holding onto the bar. He stretched his wings straight out behind him, as if he enjoyed the feel of the wind passing over them that way. Mal checked them out in the side mirror. They were impressive, no arguing that, but he wasn't going to be caught staring.

The discussion between Elisa and Ruth had astounded him. Broken his heart and restored it. He'd never thought his daughter worried about him being disappointed in her. He and Elisa had given her as much responsibility on the island as she could handle, and pushed her out of her comfort zone whenever it made sense to do so. He didn't have to push much. Most times, he had to stop himself from reining her back.

Disappointed? Her even having the thought had been a gut punch, making him wonder if he'd done or missed something over the years that had instilled that worry.

No. It comes from her own heart. Her great love for you, her desire to make sure she lives up to your expectations, even as she meets her own for herself.

It was second nature to share concerns about their children, mind-to-mind. Elisa's staunch reply eased his tension.

Mal didn't shield his children from challenges; there was certainly no room for it in the vampire world, but it was idiotic for any species to do it. A parent's job was to prepare their offspring to stand on their own two feet in the world, not shield them from it. A parent who did that was the actual child. A selfish child, protecting a favorite toy.

It didn't mean he grieved any less for the pain his children had to endure to get through those challenges. But because Elisa shared that burden with him, it kept them from interfering, taking choices and opportunities away that they shouldn't. Which had certainly been a danger, given the challenges they'd faced when the children were much younger.

She's falling in love, Elisa noted. What do you think of him?

He's feeling the same. Far less familiar territory for him, though. And he's damn scary.

That's not a bad thing for her. Not if his desire is to protect her.

Mal shot another glance at the spread wings, the male's braced legs, the way his attention moved around them, taking in everything.

Perhaps not. But I'm not sure how well he'll protect her heart.

When they reached the house, Merc had to fold his wings tight around his shoulders to get through the front door, but it was a practiced, almost unconscious move. Elisa and Ruth sat in the kitchen, comfortably chatting in the way of women.

Elisa's blue eyes brightened as she rose and came to Mal. She was brushing back a chestnut brown lock of hair that had escaped from her barrette. It tried and failed daily to hold the entirety of her mane, which Mal didn't mind at all.

He put his arms around her, held her close. I heard your words, atsilusgi . How is it you make me love you more every day?

I've been with you for eighty years. I've never made you do a single thing you didn't want to do.

He smiled at the tart reply, held her closer. What Kohana said about Ruth being irresistible? I think he said it about you first.

She pushed at him, giving him her soft smile, then his practical maid was back, leveling an intent gaze on Merc. Elisa had everything laid out for the staff meal. Normally, she'd have it cooking by now, but the delay was quickly explained.

"Merc," she said. "I'm glad you're back. I need help with the pastry dough for these Scotch pies. Your fingers are just the right size for pinching the sides. Mal," her gaze turned innocently toward him. "You and Ruth should go see the east field. Those purple wildflowers are in full bloom and you know Ruth loves those. She can show you later," Elisa told Merc.

Ruth had a droll expression on her face. Tell me again who's boss on this island, Da?

Mal shot her a look, but since Elisa was still in reach, he tucked the lock back into the barrette, his thumb passing over the cushion of her lips. While he gave her buttock a reproving squeeze, he knew her intent, and agreed with it.

A good servant anticipates her Master's needs and desires , he told his grinning daughter.

Merc's mystified expression made Mal want to chuckle. He expected the male wasn't used to being told to help in the kitchen. In a million years, he might never again meet someone brave enough to do so. But his servant was one in a million.

He brushed his mouth over Elisa's, savoring her sweet lips. Be careful with him, atsilusgi . He's not entirely house trained.

Her fingers rested on his chest, brushing the straight black hair that had fallen forward over his shoulder. I'm well used to that kind.

Now was not the time to follow up on his desire to put her beautiful mouth and hands where he wanted them. His daughter was giving him the ‘ Really, Da? We have a guest' look.

She was one to talk. Whenever her gaze turned to the male, the heat between them was obvious.

Mal gave her a don't disrespect your father look, but left Elisa with a heated thought that put a flush in her cheeks and planted the promise they'd return to the feeling later.

Yet when he gestured to Ruth to precede him to the door, Mal's mind shifted into a far different mode. He met Merc's gaze with a hard stare. And waited.

Earning points, Merc responded without the question being put out there. "She will come to no harm from me."

Mal inclined his head. "Don't ruin the meat pies," he said.

As he and Ruth left the house and walked toward the field Elisa had mentioned, Ruth leaned against him. Mal put his arm around her shoulders, pulling her close to kiss her forehead, her hair, wrapping both arms around her for a moment. Then she spun away and jumped on his back with a laugh that still held a touch of the child she'd once been. He piggy backed her to the field as she wrapped both arms around his chest.

"I need to take a picture," she said. "No one will believe that Merc helped out in the kitchen. What's got into Etsi? She's never drafted Lady Lyssa to help prepare dinner."

Mal chuckled. "She knows the protocols with vampires. Plus Merc is more than a guest. You've made that clear. Your mother has her own vetting process."

Ruth jumped down and walked beside him. When they reached the fence and she took a seat on the top rail, him resting his elbows on it next to her, he asked her some follow- up questions about her Circus experiences, things Elisa's own conversation hadn't already covered.

He could tell his daughter liked being there. Really liked it. Despite the more harrowing experiences she'd had, it reassured him anew that the decision had been a good one. She would guess, but he didn't need to detail, that Adan had made routine reports to Mal about how she was doing.

He hadn't told them about the two vampires attacking her, but his son hadn't hidden the information. Adan hadn't had a chance to touch base with Mal since then. Being a Light Guardian didn't always let him get within range of Mal's mind or, even better, have a face-to-face visit.

When the conversation reached a natural pause, Mal decided it was time to say what he knew needed to be said. "You know I love you, Ruth."

Her gaze flickered. "I know, Da. I've always known."

"Yes. But here's what you need to know, beyond the shadow of a doubt. I honor your strength, your will, your independence. And I admire it."

As she went still, he had to take a beat. What he was about to broach wasn't something he spoke of often. It had taken him years to accept the knowledge for himself.

"I was born Cherokee. I was made into a vampire. Being born of one race and evolving into another, one that integrates with and remolds your original self, isn't easy. It took me a while to learn to be proud of who I am. It took time for me to accept that being different doesn't make me any less of a vampire.

"You were born a vampire," he told her, "but you have traits that make the vampire world more challenging for you. If ever those traits become common knowledge, it will be even more difficult. But if anyone can do it, I expect you'll be the vampire who shows them natural submission in our kind is not weakness."

Her eyes widened. He'd never said it aloud, but he would do it now, showing her that she should carry no shame about it. Just caution, to protect herself.

"No more than it is in the people we claim as our servants, our greatest strength." He thought of Elisa, and the other servants he'd known. Kohana. Chumani. "That form of submission has honor to it. It's a choice, made from a position of strength that most who are Dominant may never truly understand. But I do. You're as much a warrior as your brother.

"There are always going to be people who want to put who you are, what you do, in a box, in a cage, and say you can't step outside that definition or expand it. You have to be the one to find the key and unlock the door, break down the walls and make them bigger. Turn it into a home you're comfortable in, and give that house light and space."

"I think Merc understands that struggle, Da," she said slowly, digesting his words. "Between being an incubus and an angel. I think it's part of what draws us to one another."

"Good. But whoever you choose, whether him or another, make sure he helps you strengthen that foundation in yourself. I hope we've helped with that, in all the right ways, which can also be some of the hardest ones. We often stood back when all we wanted to do was catch you, stand between you and pain, disappointment."

Her eyes went luminous, full of emotions. "A long time ago, Da, you boiled it down to three things that always seem to work for me."

"I did? Enlighten me on my own wisdom."

Her smile eased the ache of the emotions, for both of them. "Be respectful to all. Be kind where possible. Use whatever strengths I have to resist doing something I don't think is right, or being someone I'm not." Her face shadowed. "Even if I have to hide and protect that definition of myself deep inside my soul."

"Did I say that last part?" he asked.

"No. But it's a strength. Being able to do that, hold onto it, along with the hope that one day I won't have to hide it."

"I rarely repeat myself, but I'm going to do so again. I couldn't be prouder of you, Ruth. Don't ever doubt that."

Slipping off the fence rail, she came into his open arms. She put her face to his shoulder, a brief tender exchange, then straightened and stepped back. "So…do you like him?"

He lifted a brow, feigning ignorance. "Who?"

She made a face. " Sgidoda ."

"I'm not prepared to make a judgment yet."

"Good." Her eyes sparkled.

"How is that good?"

"You haven't passed judgment yet."

He made one of his neutral grunts and she laughed. "I like him, Da. I really do. He's dangerous and yet honorable. Confusing and mean and tender all at once. In the right ways. He's like us."

"He's like the cats you love."

"Maybe so." She gazed around her. "I love it here so much. Right now, I'm glad I'm seeing more of the world, but my heart knows this is my place." Her attention returned to him. "Thank you for creating it, Da. For telling the vampire world to piss off and doing the impossible."

That little smile came back to her lips. "And I'm glad you don't disapprove of him."

"I don't yet approve of him. I might. Once he proves himself."

"In a hundred years or so?"

"That's a little hasty. Perhaps two hundred."

She laughed and changed the subject to more mundane things, giving their deeper emotions time to even out. "You have a crazy couple days dead ahead. Lord Mason and Farida. I wish we could stay."

"If your business concludes early in California, swing back and catch the tail end. Your mother is excited. She's already baking their favorites."

Ruth chuckled. "For Mum, the visit is all about the kids. Lord Mason's just an afterthought. Is Kane still coming with Farida?"

"Yes. Though that information is as confidential as confidential gets," he reminded her. "Lady Lyssa is letting Lord Mason bring him while she handles other matters. His servant Jessica will join us, once she stops in Atlanta to have a shopping visit with Anwyn. Mason wanted to give her a few days' respite from servant duties, since being a Council member's servant can be," he paused, obviously recalling Mason's exact words, "‘Almost worse than the hell of being a Council member.'"

"I think only his friendship and regard for Lady Lyssa keeps him serving. He likes politics as much as you do, Da." Ruth nudged him. "And I haven't been gone long enough to forget the all-important rule about our visitor schedule. Top secret, need-to-know basis. Always."

Especially when it included the young progeny of Council members. Normally the importance of the guests had an inverse relationship with Mal's desire for them to visit. However, in the case of Farida, Mason's daughter, and Kane, Lyssa's son, the teenagers loved the island and the cats, and were such appealing, intelligent youngsters that he welcomed them as much as Elisa did.

For form's sake, though, he grimaced. "At least they've been here before. I shouldn't have to go over the rules again. Much."

" Etsi will remind them while she feeds them."

On that note, while they'd talked, Mal had kept his mind inside Elisa's. With a half smile, he shared what he was seeing with Ruth.

Elisa was instructing Merc on how to pinch the dough around the meat filling. She placed her hands on his to show him the right way of it, and when a timer went off, she ducked under one of his wings, brushing it away like a curtain as she grabbed her potholders.

He admittedly liked that Merc tried to help, moving to take the boiling stock pot off the burner for her. She stopped him with a quick admonition. Here now, you'll burn yourself, grabbing them bare handed. Use these potholders.

The unlikely picture of Merc using quilted potholders with bright flowers had Ruth smiling, but her eyes were soft. Yes, his daughter was falling in love. As a woman did, not a girl.

Elisa had felt his watchful presence. I do like him, Mal. Yes, he's scary and maybe cruel at times, but he's also vulnerable and wants to be kind. I think he's besotted with Ruth. And confused by her.

Almost an echo of what Ruth herself had said.

His daughter was looking up at him and shaking her head. "Only Mum."

Mal brushed a strand of hair from her cheek. "When it comes to your mother, I think the universe is like me. It just stands back, shakes its head and smiles."