Chapter 18 - Natalie

My body still aches when I wake up in my own bed the following day, but it's a delicious kind of ache. It"s the pain of a man who knows how to work a woman's body.

I shouldn't have wanted this last night.

If I were smarter, I wouldn't have slept with him, but I think I"ve already proven in the last few days that I"m probably one of the dumbest women in the world.

Even after Leon had picked me up at the police station, I allowed him to take me to his room. And when he pinned me against the wall, all I could think about was how much I wanted him, longed for him, and craved his touch.

Leon holds a power over me, it's suffocating. All consuming. Intoxicating.

Just the thought of him teasing me with a knife, my hands bound, and my body immobile, has heat pooling between my legs again.

No. Out of bed. Figure out what you're going to do now.

I don't know how I got back to my room last night. I don't think I walked, especially when I throw back the covers and try to get up, I almost fall over again.

Yesterday was too much. He toyed with my head and my body and gave me too many orgasms to count. Proving to me that he can take what he wants when he wants it, and I can't do anything about it. But he made me feel alive and desired as I never was before, even though he said he was punishing me.

I gladly accept his punishments any day. No, no, what am I thinking?

As I go to the bathroom to get cleaned up, I know he was right. He's ruined me for anyone else.

Mafia boss he may be, but this man can fuck better than anyone I've ever known. Leon has driven me to the brink of obliteration. The things he did to me, how deliberate he was with every touch, how he drove me to the edge of the abyss and brought me back with just the crook of a finger. And the things he did with his tongue.

I lean over the sink, letting the water run cold for a few seconds before splashing it on my face.

After cleaning up, I head to the closet, looking through the clothing Leon had delivered a few days ago. Most of it is nothing I ever thought about wearing: tight jeans with rips in the thighs, corseted tops designed to show off my breasts.

If this is what he wants to see me in, then maybe I can oblige. Just to keep him happy until I can come up with another plan.

However, a plan without him in my life seems rather pointless.

With every day that passes, it gets harder and harder to figure out where I belong. And there are still so many unanswered questions.

I pull out one of the black bustier tops and reach for a pair of light jeans. It might be a little overdressed for breakfast. To dress it down a little, I dig through the closet until I find a white linen button-up shirt. And luckily, there"s plenty of beautiful underwear to choose from, so I opt for a lovely white lace bralette and leave the shirt"s top buttons undone, just far enough to let a little lace peek through.

It takes me a few minutes to get dressed and dab some makeup on the dark circles under my eyes, but I can do nothing about the hickeys on my neck and the scratches on my wrists.

There's a knock at the door as I pull on the button-up hanging loosely over my jeans.

I stride to the door and yank it open, knowing he won't be on the other side because he would never stoop to knocking on the door. No, he would barge in and tell me that I have no privacy when it comes to him.

Not that it matters.

I have no choice but to listen to him now.

If I don't, he'll kill the only people in the world I care about.

Rosalie looks at me, her lips pursing together, highlighting the soft wrinkles forming on her forehead.

"Mr. Orlov is expecting you to join him for breakfast in the sunroom today."

"You are still here." I pause because I don"t know what to say to her. "I'm sorry. I just wanted to get out of here, and I figured you"d probably get in trouble for it, but I couldn't stay."

Rosalie looks at me for a moment. "It doesn't matter. What happened is over, and it's time to move on. That means you should get downstairs before he comes looking for you."

I nod and scurry past her, heading down the stairs and to the sunroom.

Leon sits at a small white bistro table in front of the windows, plates of waffles and fresh fruit in front of him.

I sit down opposite him, but something doesn't smell quite right.

He looks up at me as he cuts his waffle into pieces, spears a small sliver and a strawberry before popping it into his mouth,

The strange smell gets up my nose again, making me clamp a hand over my mouth and retch.

"Rosalie," I call out as she passes the door. I hold the plate out to her and try to breathe through my mouth, so I don't have to smell whatever bothers me. "Can you take that away, please?"

She nods, stepping into the room and grabbing the plate. "Is there anything else you would like instead?"

"Maybe some oatmeal, please, and strawberries."

"One moment." Rosalie leaves the room while Leon eyes me from the other side of the table.

He grins, and his gaze falls on one of the hickeys on my neck. "I would have thought you'd be ravenous after last night."

I shrug, the guilt overriding the nausea. "I'm hungry; there was just something on my plate that smelled funny."

"And that's why you gagged?" Leon puts down his fork and reaches for his coffee mug.

Biting the inside of my cheek, I look away from him and out the window.

This is one of the moments I've been trying to avoid.

Ever since I found out about the baby, I was sure I would never tell him. I thought I could return to school, and we"d never see each other again. Pearl is the only one who knows I slept with Leon and got pregnant, but I didn"t tell her his name.

School.

"What should I do about art school?" I ask with a pinched tone. "We're approaching the end of the year. I have to start my final project."

"I had my people pretend to be Marina and contact them. They were told that there was an emergency and that you would have to return home before the end of the year. Your professors were very understanding. They said your grades were good enough to pass this year; you just need to submit your final art project."

"So, that's it then?" My voice breaks as I look at him. "I just have to give up on my dreams?"

Leon shakes his head. "You have your personal art studio in the conservatory. The whole building is made of glass, even the ceiling. Some tropical plants grow in there. I"ve put some painting materials there for you."

For a moment, I don't know what to say to this unexpected stroke of kindness.

I didn't think that he would make it so comfortable for me to live here beyond providing a bedroom. Even the bedroom was more than I bargained for.

The man sitting in front of me now contradicts the one I have built up in my head. He doesn"t act like he wants to kill me, but he wavers back and forth between hot and cold. I don't know what to think when I look at him, but there is something profound in his dark blue eyes.

Leon eats a few more bites of his food while I poke around in the oatmeal before me. The tension between us is more sexual than uncomfortable, especially when his gaze rakes up and down my white shirt.

"You look good." Leon nods and stares at my chest. "I was wondering when you"d start wearing the clothes I bought you. Usually, women love it when I buy them new clothes?"

I pause, my spoon halfway to my mouth. "Do you buy many clothes for your women?"

"Would it bother you if I did?" he asks, the grin on his face widening.

"No."

Yes.

This shouldn't get under my skin, but it does.

Even though I know that there have been women before me and that this is not a relationship, the thought of having to share his cock with another woman makes me sick to my stomach.

Or it is the morning sickness and the aversion to food.

Leon folds his hands together and leans forward on the table. "You've avoided the question long enough. Why didn't you want the fruit and waffles? You almost looked green in the face. Are you feeling sick?"

I should have an excuse. I should tell him I'm allergic to something on the plate, but things will only get worse when the baby bump shows, and he finds out I've been lying to him the whole time.

After how rough he was with me last night, he must also know that he can't just flip me around and touch me as he pleases. What we did last night won't hurt the baby, but if he gets any other ideas, it could be dangerous.

"I'm pregnant. I've been pregnant for weeks. Since the first night, we slept together."

His jaw clenches, muscles pulsing as he pushes back from the table, and the chair squeaks on the floor. "Why the fuck didn't you tell me about the baby sooner?"

And there it is. The one question I hoped he wouldn't ask.

I look at the table and force myself to take a shuddering breath. "I didn't really want to tell you. I didn't think you"d care about the baby. And I was worried about the life your family is leading. It could harm our child."

His nostrils flare. "You should have told me instead of hiding it from me! What makes you think I wouldn't care for my flesh and blood?"

Tears well up in my eyes, the pregnancy hormones making me more emotional than ever. "You murdered my family. Why should I believe, you would take care of your own?"

He comes around the table, kneels beside me, and takes my hands tenderly despite the anger blazing in his eyes. "I would never let anything happen to our baby. Never."

"You can't promise that. I"ve read the stories about your family. I know what you're capable of. It would put the baby in danger."

Understanding dawns on his face. "So that's why you snuck out. You found out what I do for a living and figured running away was better than talking about it."

"What else was I supposed to do? The internet said you kill people for a living. I had no desire to spend the rest of the night with a man who is a suspected killer in the eyes of the law!"

"And now you know the truth."

"I don't know if anything you've ever told me is true."

His hands squeeze around mine tighter. "I've told you the truth. I own businesses."

"To fund illegal activities."

"Yes." He lets go of my hands and stands up. "What else would you have me say, Natalie? Do you want the truth, or don't you?"

"I want the truth."

"So, there you have it." He pulls a cigarette out of his pocket before looking down at my stomach and puts it away again. "I'm a bad person. You know that, but part of you craves the security that it brings. Part of you likes knowing that I would do anything to protect you. You love knowing that I would kill a man for you because you're carrying my child ... and because you are mine."

When he puts it like that, there"s something appealing about a man who would do anything for me, even if it"s just because I'm carrying his child.

"Will you only take care of me while I'm pregnant? Will you let me go afterward?"

"So, you can leave with the baby? What part of ‘you are mine' don't you understand?" He scoffs and shakes his head, tucking his hands in his pockets. "You ... and now this baby are mine!"

I stay quiet as I try to sort out the jumble in my brain and string my words together.

Leon may make my body sing, and my heart flutter, but there"s that little voice in the back of my head that always reminds me of who he is, what he"s done, and what he"s capable of.

He leans closer to me. "You've tried to get away from me a few times now, Natalie and I'm getting tired of it. This baby will bind us together for the rest of our lives."

"We could learn how to co-parent. Set up a custody plan." I say casually.

His wicked grin sends a shiver through my body and straight to my pussy.

"No, solnyshko. There will be no fucking custody plan." He pulls out his cell phone and runs his thumbs over the screen before tucking it away again. "No man in my family has had children without being married. I'm not going to be the one to break tradition."

I snort a laugh and push my breakfast aside as my stomach turns again. "You can't possibly think we should get married."

"I don't think we should." He takes my jaw in his hand and leans down to ghost a kiss over my lips. "I know we're going to get married. I like the idea of you spending the rest of your life with me. I like it even better that you bear my name. And I like the fact that you are the mother of my child."

"Leon, this is crazy. Your family, your brother–you said they would kill me?"

"They may not like it, or you, but they will respect me and my decision. That's what we stand for."

His expression is unreadable, but for a split second, I can sense his uneasiness.

As he strides out of the room, I don't think he's serious. He can't be. But when Rosalie enters the room with a solemn face, I know he is.

Leon intends to bind us together through marriage for the rest of our lives, and if I'm honest, I don't find the idea as bad as I thought.

Growing up as an orphan, I always dreamed of motherhood, of having my own little family one day and a loving husband by my side.

Leon is a man capable of many things, but … love?