Chapter Twenty Mabel

I want to pull back. I want to scream and shout and bang my fists against Reeve's stupid face. Yet, none of that happens. Instead, I step through the door, my feet leading me confidently towards the man now I loathe more than the king. I want to kick and fight and do everything I can to get rid of this horrible curse that has always plagued me.

Instead, my traitorous body responds to the curse, even reaching out and taking his hand when he stretches for mine. He leads me out of the doorway and down the long corridor, his steps slow as though he's just an off-duty guard taking a leisurely walk with his beau. I try to scream. I try to pull back, but the curse is strong with him this close to me, and his intent focused solely on binding me to him. Instead, we walk down the long hallway as though we are lovers or friends or anything but the enemies we truly are. His hand is cold in mine, dry to the touch, and it feels so foreign to me.

I reach out with my mind and try to make contact with Zeklan, but Reeve is too smart for that. He tugs on my hand and drags me forward so I almost stumble. I wish I was stronger and smarter, but Reeve has such complete control of my mind that all I do is wander alongside him as we go down flights of stairs and traverse the castle. I have no idea where we are. Glancing around, I quickly realize that I've never been in this part of the palace before. As we change direction at a junction of corridors, I see someone rushing down the hallway far ahead of me. I want to shout out to them, but they are turning a corner already and I sense Reeve is worried. Turning to look at him, I see the set of his jaw and the furrow of his brow. That person running has him worried, but I have no idea why.

Yet, what does it matter if I know why he's worried or concerned? There's nothing I can do anyway. He's got complete control of me. The panic starts to grind me up inside and I close my eyes as I feel tears running down my cheeks. I wish to all the gods that Zeklan tries to reach out to me first that he realizes something is wrong. Even as I think it, Reeve is looking at me and tugging me harder, pulling me closer to him. He flings an arm around my shoulders so, to anyone passing, we might appear to be lovers looking for a place to spend some time alone. Holding my head high is the only control I have over him and it's nowhere near enough.

There is a panic rising inside of me the further we move away from my quarters. I can feel it pulsing through my veins, an uneasiness and unsettling sensation as the bond seems to strengthen between Reeve and I and weaken towards the others. I bite down hard on my lower lip, tasting blood rather than show Reeve just how much this is breaking me right now.

To distract myself from the internal pain, I try to concentrate on exactly where we are and how many floors we've traveled down since Reeve presented at my doorway. The others are up with Queen Siorah in the war room and they are not even likely to notice my strife anyway since they will be solely involved in preparing for the king's likely attack on the castle. I wish now that I had followed them, that I hadn't stayed behind to quickly freshen up before joining them. Why had I wanted to do that anyway?

I look at the man beside me, the one who has controlled my life for so long now. His jaw is set in a grim line, his brow furrowed as he concentrates on wherever it is he's taking me. Every now and again he glances down at a crumpled piece of paper in his hand. Looking closer, I see it's a crude map of the castle and I wonder how on earth he managed to get a hold of it.

Another hurried person is seen as we reach the junction of the corridor we are following, and Reeve pulls us to the wall. I cringe beside him worried about what exactly is going on. I fear for the queen, even though she barely even wants me here anymore. Even more, I fear for my monsters. Is the king in here too? And if he is, is he on his way to kill the queen now? Oh, how I wish I could make contact with Zeklan, then at least they would know that trouble is brewing. And once again, as I think Zeklan's name, Reeve is there in my head, pushing all thoughts aside. Even as he does it, I wonder if they can feel it anyway and I try to reach out again before the warm allure of the curse covers me so thickly that I can barely breathe. He may be starting to panic over something I can't quite understand, he is still doing his very best to control me and that makes me sick to the stomach.

Reeve's cloying breath is hot against my skin, and I shrink back as far as the curse will allow. Even as I hear footfalls, he is on me, his lips pressed against mine, his breathing heavy as his tongue forces its way between my lips. He presses his body against mine and I feel his puny erection, hot against my stomach.

I want to fight him, and my stomach succeeds as it roils in knots but his bind on me has me returning the kiss. I try to clamp down on his tongue, to bite hard and draw blood but nothing happens. Instead, my tongue swirls around his as though this is the easiest thing in the world to do.

Gods, how my life sucks.

When the person passes, Reeve draws us back into the center of the wide corridor and sets back to our steady pace.

"How does it feel to have to control me in order to get me to kiss you?" I ask as I wipe my mouth. He senses what I am doing, and my hand instantly drops to my side so all I can taste is his foul breath on my tongue and the wetness on my lips.

"One day, you'll do it because you love me," he hisses in return as he drags me along behind him.

"I doubt that."

Reeve ignores my comment, checking his map again and continuing on our way. It feels like we've been walking for hours, for days even, and yet at the same time it feels like mere moments since I was inside my room and had no idea that trouble was about to walk straight up to me and change my life so completely.

Reeve picks up the pace when a third person comes running toward us. This time Reeve freezes and I still beside him as though I'm a mere extension of his own body. And, in a way, that's all I am. That's all I've ever been. I feel the heat of tears as they spring to my eyes. For so long, I've just been this creature wandering around doing the king's bidding and not really caring exactly what happened to me. But now that the monsters have entered my life and shown me exactly what I've been missing all these years, the bitter sadness that rolls over me is oh so much worse now. There's no way I want this to be over yet. There's no way I can imagine never seeing Brugo, Fenn, Zeklan, or Arthur ever again. My mind can't even wrap itself around that possibility. And yet, here I am, knowing full well now that he has me in his clutches. There's no way I can escape, and the happiness I knew just hours ago is never going to be again.

With that realization, I swallow back everything, the desire for my monsters, the happiness I feel with them, the hope I had for the future. All of it is forced down into the depths of my soul, bottled up and chained so that I no longer can feel my future. Instead, the world around me turns gray as we finally exit the castle. Even the crisp, cold air does nothing to alleviate the terror and despair inside of me as Reeve has his victory.

I drag my feet as he leads me away from everything I have ever loved.