Chapter Thirty-One

Flashes of memories began to come often. Not of my time before I arrived at the fortress but before Ara and I had become a couple. I remembered how we had planned together, how we had fooled Death. How we were going to escape. But those memories were distant, almost as if someone else had lived them. Fight Death? Why would we do that? He gave us everything, including each other. And Ara was all I wanted. I craved him. He gave me what no one had ever given me before. He opened me to possibilities, not the least of which were sexual.

I wanted Ara all the time. Inside me. Me inside him. Both of us inside each other's mouths at the same time. It was a hedonistic paradise. I never wanted it to end. So, I pushed aside the latest memory and focused on Aranren.

"I love your hair," I said as I brushed Ara's hair while he sat at his dressing table.

He watched me through our reflection. "I love it when you brush it. Thank you."

"I enjoy it. I used to do it for . . ." I blinked, my hands going still.

"Ember?"

"I was about to say someone's name." I frowned. "Whose hair did I used to brush?"

Aranren frowned. He had been getting forgetful lately too. "I don't know, my love. There has only ever been you and I."

I nodded, my expression clearing. "You're right. I'm being silly again."

"What should we do today?" he asked.

"I should probably train."

"You should have breakfast, then each other," Death said. "Or maybe you should have each other first."

"Why are you so interested in our sex life?" I growled. "Go away! We're trying to have a private moment."

"Good. Have more of those."

"What is wrong with you?" Ara asked Death. "You've been behaving oddly lately."

"It's not me. It's the two of you. You should be bonded by now. Aren't you in love?" Death grumbled.

"Yes," Ara and I said together.

But then I paused, trying to remember what bonding was and why I wanted to do it with Ara. "How are we supposed to bond?"

"Magically!" Death roared.

Ara shot to his feet. "Do not speak to him like that!"

The echoes of Ara's shout rang off the walls, silencing Death.

I took Ara's hand. "Thank you, but it's all right. He's only trying to look after us."

"I am," Death said. "You will both gain power once you're bonded."

"I don't know how to do that," I said.

"Ugh! Fine."

A little tingle touched my brain, and I remembered. Just a little, but it was enough that a name popped into being. Xaedren. He was the one whose hair I used to brush. It would get so tangled if I didn't. And then he'd threaten to cut it off. Xae. Who was he? Then it came to me. I was bonded to him through magic. Xaedren, Ratharin, Keltyr, and Taroc. Four lovers. I used to have four lovers.

"Ember?" Ara squeezed my hand.

I took a sudden breath, as if remembering so much had made me forget simple things, like how to breathe. I focused on Aranren. The Corrupter. Except he wasn't who I'd thought he was. He was my lover now. My only lover. All I needed. So why hadn't I bonded with him as I had with the others?

"Spirit," I whispered.

"What's that?" Death demanded.

In a stronger voice, I said, "Spirit. It's how I bond with someone I love." I stretched up on my toes to kiss Ara's cheek. "And you have been repressing my Spirit Magic, Death." I frowned, looking away from Ara. "Why? What's wrong with Spirit? Isn't my control of all magic what makes me unique?"

"Yes," Death said, his voice low and the tone pensive. "I see. In trying to draw you two closer, I've cut you off from the very thing you need to seal your relationship."

"Seal it?" Ara asked. "This bond lasts forever?"

A pause, then, "Yes."

"So I will still be bonded to those other men," I concluded.

"What other men?!" Ara snapped.

"Oh, for fuck's sake," Death grumbled.

Ara's expression went slack, then he blinked. Then he roared, "You have suppressed my memories?! Mine?"

"You betrayed me!" Death roared back, his voice even stronger than Aranren's.

Both of us cringed and covered our ears.

"I'm sorry," Death said in his usual tone. "I don't mean to be so harsh with you."

"I have been your partner for centuries," Ara said. "I don't deserve this."

"You conspired to escape me," Death said.

The words rang through me, summoning the memories of Ara and me again. The ones of us laughing and planning. Hoping. What did hope feel like? I couldn't remember.

"I would never do that," Ara said, then frowned. "Oh."

"Yes, oh," Death drawled. "You love Ember. And that love made you foolish."

"You still shouldn't have taken everything."

"I didn't. I left you with much more than I did him."

"Hold on," I said. "How many memories have you taken from me?"

"I didn't take anything. I merely covered them," Death said. "Forget about that. You must make love to Aranren and bond with him."

"We can't just perform on command!" I snarled.

Death sighed. "Very well. I will leave you as you are. Do not disappoint me. I expect you to be bonded by tomorrow morning."

And then he was gone.

I looked at Ara.

He yanked me into his arms, and murmured into my hair, "Ember."

"What's going on, Ara?" I clutched at his robes. "I'm so confused."

"I know, and I'm sorry. Death has done a terrible thing to both of us. But that doesn't change what we feel for each other. We must hold onto that. Love will guide us."

Your heart will never lead you wrong, a woman's voice whispered through my mind.

I lifted my head. That voice did something to me, sent a shiver down my spine. It was a memory, but of who? Damn Death for taking pieces of my mind. Why had he done it? Right. Because Ara and I tried to escape. But escape implies captivity. Were we captives? I thought we could leave whenever we wished. It didn't feel as if we were prisoners.

Burn bright, little spark, the voice came again.

"Ember!" Ara's hand went to my face. "Why are you crying, my love?"

"I don't know. I just have a terrible feeling that Death is hiding more than our memories. Ara, we need to get out of here."

"We can go wherever you wish, Ember. Where do you want to go?"

"I see somewhere in my head, but I don't know where it is."

"Take me there."

I took Ara's hands and faded us to the place I saw in my mind. Yes, faded. I had Spirit back, and I didn't want to use Death Magic to travel as Ara did. Death had taught me how, but I didn't want him to sense us and know where we had gone. I wasn't sure yet, but this could be an escape.

We arrived in a room equipped with strange devices—big contraptions that looked as if they were meant to torture people. But the room also had a bed in it. Who would torture someone, then go to sleep in the same room?

"Ember, where have you taken us?" Ara asked as he strolled around the room, idly running his hands over the odd things.

"I don't know." I went to the window, pulled aside the curtains, and stared down into a busy street. "I think this is a Tytra city."

"Tytra?" Ara joined me at the window. "You're right. Those are definitely Tytras." His gaze lifted to the ring of mountains visible over the rooftops. "I believe this is Myar."

"I was here recently," I said. "I'm sure of it. Someone brought me here."

"For what purpose?" Ara turned to stare at the contraptions again. Then he blinked. "Oh."

"What?" I spun about.

"This is a room for pleasure, my love."

"It is?" I looked closer at the equipment, then at the table with its rows of odd items. My stare caught on something phallic and a memory bashed into my brain. I gasped and gripped the window sill.

"Ember!" Ara steadied me.

"Holy shit," I whispered. "We need to leave."

Aranren's expression went grim. "Yes, I believe we do. Why don't we go into the city and find somewhere to have our breakfast?"

"Did you bring any crystals with you?"

"Crystals?" He blinked. "Oh, elemental crystals. No. We won't have to pay."

"We won't?"

"No. Something tells me that they'll be happy to provide us with whatever we wish for free."

"All right." I took his hand, trusting him implicitly, and we left the place where I had been intimate with another man.

I tried to push his image out of my mind, but it kept returning. Those eyes, so blue. Darker than Ara's. They shone against the curve of scales at his temples. Tytra scales. One of my lovers had been a Tytra. Would he return to that place soon? Would he smell me there? I shivered, thinking of how he might search for me. Wait. Did I love him? Love was needed to form a bond, so I must. Then why was I with Ara?

I looked at Ara as we stepped out onto the street. Oh, yes. Because Aranren was glorious. More lovely than anyone else on the planet. He—

"The Corrupter!" a woman's scream rent the air. "He's here! The Corrupter is here!"

Ara flinched. I gaped at the woman. Then we both stared in shock as people ran, desperate to get away. We looked around, searching for the source of their fear, but there was nothing.

"I think they're running from us," Ara whispered. He blinked rapidly, then said, "Oh, fuck."

"What is it?"

"Come here, my love." His whole demeanor changed, becoming more confident, stronger. He tucked my head in against his chest and summoned Death Magic.

I felt it swirl around us, spinning us away from Myar and the screaming, running Tytra. We reformed just before our dining table in the hall. When Ara released me, I lifted my head, prepared for Death's displeasure. But he wasn't there. Even Ara's use of his magic hadn't summoned him.

I relaxed.

"Breakfast!" Ara called.

Faint sounds immediately came from the kitchen door. Ara took my hand and led me around the table, then pulled out my chair. I sank into it, still confused. Seconds after we were seated, someone was pouring coffee into my mug. I stared at it. My head still rang with those screams.

"We forgot who we are, my love," Ara said. "Death wanted us to concentrate on each other so he removed our memories of his plan."

"His plan," I murmured.

"To conquer Varr and make us emperors."

With Ara's words, it returned. Our mission. Our purpose. Death had swept it away. Was our bonding that important to him? But of course, it was. Once bonded, we would have the power to complete his plan. I mean our plan. Ara and I would rule Varr. There would be peace. No more screaming.

"People are afraid of us because they don't understand," I said.

"Precisely." Ara lifted my hand and kissed it.

He stroked my hair and said soothing things to me until our meal came. Then Ara filled my plate and even fed me bites until I shook my head and picked up my fork. Things were coming back to me. Small things, but I was sure they were memories that Death didn't want me to see. Like that Tytra.

By the end of the meal, I knew that I couldn't bond with Ara. But with my Spirit Magic free, maybe I could free us as well. All of us.

"Will is the greatest power of all," I whispered.

"What's that, my love?" Ara asked.

"Nothing." I smiled at him. Ara was still under Death's spell. But I could free him. Because I had the will, and I finally remembered how to use it.