Chapter Forty-Three

Where is she? Jak's heart thumped nervously as he looked out the window for the hundredth time, hoping to see her truck pulling through the gate, but the gate was still closed.

He walked down the stairs and into the foyer where Nigel appeared as Jak had hoped he would, though he still couldn't figure out how he did that. Jak would say he was like a wolf and could smell people as they got near, but the man didn't have the feel of a wolf. He definitely had the feel of something slinkier. "Did I miss any calls?"

He cleared his throat. "No, sir. Not in the last twenty minutes."

He narrowed his eyes, sensing the man was using…sarcasm. He'd learned that word today from one of his books, learned the meaning. But his books hadn't said that some people used sarcasm to make people feel bad about themselves. Slinky.

He leaned closer, wrinkling his nose. He smelled slinky too. Oily. "How do you see people before they come into a room?"

Nigel lifted his nose like he was smelling something but didn't inhale. "The cameras, sir."

Cameras. Jak's heart dropped to his feet. "Cameras?"

"Yes, sir. There are cameras in the rooms, so the staff knows where the family may need service."

A buzzing had started in Jak's ears, like the cicadas—he'd learned the name of those insects that buzzed and sang in the trees, filling the forest with their noise, but only every seventeen years. They'd only come out once, but Jak remembered them—the whole forest had vibrated from their mating.

Jak turned from Nigel, walking toward the library, glancing up now and again, trying to spot the cameras.

He was being watched. Again.

He closed the large door behind him, standing against it for a minute as he fought to catch his breath. He felt…he didn't know the word. There were still so many words he didn't know. He walked to the table, picking up the dictionary and leafing through it like he might stumble upon the right word to tell him how he was feeling.

The door clicked. He smelled her before he saw her. The bird woman. She smiled at him and closed the door behind her.

"Jak," she purred. She was always purring, like a cat. But cats hated birds. Maybe that's why she liked to hear them cry. She came toward him, and he wanted to back away but held his ground, that slight cicada buzzing growing louder in his ears again.

She ran her bird talons down his chest, licking her lips and looking up at him. "Oh, the things I could teach you, Jak." She unbuttoned the top button of her shirt, then the second.

He understood what she wanted. She was going to get naked like the redheaded woman and offer her body to Jak, though he'd done nothing to try to earn it. He stepped away, and her hand dropped from his chest. "I have a woman."

She laughed, but it wasn't like a laugh. More like the sound a coyote made right before it attacked something. Her tongue clicked, and she moved closer again. "Big man like you?" She looked down, her eyes stopping between his legs and then raising to his face. "One woman can't be enough."

"You're wrong."

"So sweet," she purred. "But I wouldn't stop you like she did. I'd let you do whatever you wanted. Would you like that? Hmm?" She reached down, rubbing her hand over his manhood, grasping him. He hissed with surprise.

I wouldn't stop you like she did.

She'd watched them? Him and Harper. Right there. He looked up, searching for the camera and spotting it in the far corner of the ceiling. His blood boiled, and a groan came up his throat. He'd felt safe there.

"Oh yess," she purred, rubbing him harder.

He took her by her arms and pushed her away. She stumbled backward, catching herself. "Don't ever touch me again," he growled.

Her eyes filled with anger, her cheeks getting red. She stepped toward him, her mouth opening to speak when a knock came at the door.

"Come in," Jak called, trying to cool the hot anger in his blood, the feeling of… betrayal. He took a deep breath, letting it flow through his body.

The door opened, and Nigel entered. "Agent Gallagher is here to see you, sir."

Jak didn't look at the cat-pretend-bird lady as he said, "Tell him I'm in here."

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her lift her shoulders, and then her back was to him as she walked out. The room still held her smell. It made him feel…disgust.

Agent Gallagher entered and Jak sunk onto the edge of the table, letting it hold his weight for a moment. "Jak," he said, a strange look on his face. A mixture of sadness and…something else.

He straightened up, offering the agent his hand. They shook.

"Can we sit down?" the agent asked. Jak nodded, his heart beating faster.

"Is Harper okay?"

"Harper's fine. She was with me this morning. I just dropped her at home. This isn't about her."

Jak frowned. Why had she gone with the agent instead of picking him up like she said she would? Something was wrong.

They sat in two chairs near the stone fireplace, and Agent Gallagher leaned forward, his elbows on his knees. "We did another search of Isaac Driscoll's land, Jak."

"Okay," he said slowly.

"We found two bodies, both children, though of different ages."

Jak's blood turned icy. He didn't move.

The agent sat back, letting out a deep sigh. "We also found an old mine shaft that Isaac Driscoll used to store his…work."

The buzzing again. Louder. In his head. Under his skin. Everywhere.

"We found the pictures, Jak. And video recordings…of you. They begin when you're very young and continue until Driscoll was killed."

Jak's stomach knotted. He couldn't speak.

"We also found the bow that we believe was used to kill your mother. We found pictures of her from town and her purse too with her ID. It looks like he was following her."

Driscoll . Driscoll had killed his mother. It should make him angry, full of…rage. But he couldn't feel anything. Why?

"We believe Driscoll found out somehow that she'd interfered with what he was doing, that she planned to tell you the truth, or maybe she told him of her plans herself, confronted him, and he went to her room at the bed-and-breakfast and killed her."

Silence. Jak took in the words. He'd go over them later, try to feel something about them.

"I need you to tell me about the other kids, Jak," Agent Gallagher said, and there was only sadness in his face. And…disappointment. Deep shame rolled through Jak. Cold sickness.

"Did Harper see?" he finally choked out. Does Harper know what I did? What I am?

Agent Gallagher studied him for a second, his expression still sad. "Yes. Harper saw the pictures. She found the mine shaft."

Jak let out a sound that was like a dying animal.

"Jak," Agent Gallagher sat forward. "I need to know what happened. What really happened."

Numbness swept through Jak, and he sagged back in the chair, squeezing his eyes shut for a second. When he opened them, he said, "It happened the way I said, only there were three boys with me. One died in the fall. I pushed another one to a ledge, but he probably died too. I killed the third one. But that was later. We fought over food. I tried—"

"I saw the video, Jak."

Jak's eyes moved slowly to the agent's face. He couldn't tell what was there, but he could imagine what the man was thinking. Beast. Animal. Killer.

Video. Video was moving pictures. There was video of Jak stabbing that boy and leaving his body in the snow. Sickness moved up his throat, and with effort, he swallowed it down.

"Do you have any idea who those boys were?"

Jak shook his head but slowly. "No. I don't know anything about them."

Silence for a minute and then Agent Gallagher said, "We think the boy you…fought…lived under Isaac Driscoll's porch for a while. There were notes about a rat living under his porch and stealing his food, his knife. He talked about setting up a test. We think he set up that fight between you both to see what you'd do."

Numbness. Buzzing. Sickness. Swallow it down, swallow it down.

"Jak—"

"Why did he do it? Take me. Watch me…" It was the same question he'd battled with since he saw the photos from Driscoll's cabin. Why? Why me? Jak was filled with anger, and he didn't know what words to use.

Agent Gallagher's jaw tightened. "We think he was doing observational experiments. At first, they were mostly about survival, strength, fortitude. We believe he meant the house you lived in to house all of you, but you were the only one who survived. His notes indicate he was planning on more specific studies on you using contrived situations, actors…"

"I don't understand all those words," he admitted, his head swimming. He didn't like to say that, but he needed to understand.

"I'm sorry, Jak. I think Driscoll was going to use people to pretend they were someone they were not and watch how you reacted."

"The redheaded woman," Jak said. His voice sounded as dead as he felt.

Agent Gallagher nodded. "Yes," he said and his voice broke just a little. Was he sad? Disgusted? Both, Jak thought. "We saw the notes on that, the video…"

Jak hung his head. He wanted to cry. To howl until his voice broke and his lungs stopped working. He wanted to find a den and burrow there alone so no one would ever find him.

"Jak…did you kill Isaac Driscoll?"

He met Agent Gallagher's eyes. "No. When I got to his cabin, he was already dying."

There was silence for several minutes. "Jak, we need you to come down to the station and make a statement, but I wanted…I wanted to let you know all of this first. I can pick you up in the morning. How's that?"

Agent Gallagher was being nice to him, giving him time, he knew that. He didn't know why. Was it because he felt sorry for Jak and wanted to give him one last night of a soft bed and hot water before they locked him up? "Okay. Thank you."

"I'm sure once you process all of this, you'll have questions for me too. I'll answer anything I can."

Jak thought he might have nodded, but he was having trouble feeling his body. "Okay."

"Okay." Pause. "Jak, just one final question and then we'll talk tomorrow. Is there anything about Harper's parents that you didn't tell me?"

Jak met his eyes. "No. I told you everything I know about that."

The agent studied his face for a second and then nodded. "Okay. If you need me tonight, you call, all right?" He reached into his pocket and took out a small white card, handing it to Jak. "My number is on here. If you want to call me and your grandfather hasn't gotten you a phone yet, just ask someone around here to show you how to dial the number on the landline, all right?"

Landline. He had no idea what that was. He was lost. He'd always be lost. "Okay."

The agent stood, and so did Jak. The agent had a worried look on his face. Did he think Jak might hurt him too? Jak looked up at the corner of the ceiling. "There are cameras in here," Jak said. If he hurt anyone, that would be on video too. Just another thing to lock him up for. Also, he realized, what the agent had just told him had been recorded as well. But who cared? To know things and to see things was very different. Very different.

Harper.

His stomach knotted again.

The agent gave him a confused look but nodded. "All right. I'll show myself out. Then I'll be back in the morning. Nine o'clock, okay?"

"Okay." Jak watched as Agent Gallagher left the room, heard him say something to slinky Nigel in the hallway, and then the sound of his footsteps was gone.

Jak left the library, the place where he'd felt safe and…happy. For a time. Now, now there was nowhere he felt safe.

Brett stepped out of a doorway, opening his stupid big-toothed mouth to say something, and Jak growled, pushing him out of his way. He stopped, hoping Brett would want to fight him, but he stumbled back, letting out a high-pitched sound like a girl chipmunk. It would be no fun to fight a female squirrel. He'd crush him. "Jesus, you're an animal," Brett said to his back as Jak walked on. Brett was right. Jak couldn't hide it. He'd thought he could, but he was wrong.

The sound of the crying birds drew him. He entered the aviary, stopping and looking around at the beautiful sad creatures. The cat-pretend-bird lady was there, and she moved toward him. "I knew you'd come around."

Jak stepped by her, moving toward the cages. He flung one of the doors open and then moved to the other two, the birds quieting, hesitating. He reached in and took one of the bright-yellow creatures in his hand and threw it into the air, the bird whooping and fluttering her wings, flying free. "What are you doing ?" Loni screeched.

He flung the third birdcage door open, and a few birds flew out. He began tossing more of them into the air, their wings flapping with happiness, and after a moment more followed.

Jak ran to the wall of windows, unlocking them and flinging them outward as Loni screeched some more, trying to get the doors of the cages closed. But she was taken over in a massive fluttering of wings, the bird cries turning to laughter that rang through the room, growing louder, more joyous. They rushed toward the window, following one another to freedom.

"You beast ! You uncivilized savage !" she screeched. "You'll kill them! They'll all die out there!"

He walked past her, heading for the door. Yes, he knew that. Creatures couldn't live where they didn't belong. But at least they'd die laughing.