3. Better Off With A Dog

Chapter 3

Better Off With A Dog

G race

I lost myself in the picture that I had created in my mind. I'd buy a bungalow and seclude myself in the peace. Listening to the waves crash along the beach, I'd let my dog play fetch in the water. It sounded so good that I wanted to reach out and grab it with both hands. The dream faded, and I noticed my hand was opening and closing, trying to grab that imaginary image.

"Easy, mama. I like to see you flustered like that. It's better than the ice queen. Makes you human."

I blushed at my stupidity, the heat rising from my cheeks as I tried to figure out what to say that would smooth this over. I'd been sitting in the middle of a biker bar, dreaming of a life I would never have. I should have been making my plans a reality instead of letting life pass me by.

I was mad at myself, but my first thought was to let him have it. He didn't know me well enough to make those assumptions, even though they were true. I didn't let people into my inner circle, as it was easier to ice them out so they'd leave me alone.

Before I could snap something nasty at him, the waitress came back to the table. She ignored me and looked directly at him, asking, "The regular, Sabre?"

"Sure, Dee, and whatever she's having," he said, nodding at me.

The waitress acknowledged me. "What can I bring you, girlie? Something fruity?" she asked.

"No, thank you. I am good with water," I told her, checking the dance floor again .

"Is our liquor not good enough for you? We have the premium spirits, girlie." Dee stood with her hand on her hip, and I swore she'd pop bubblegum if she'd been chewing any.

I was about done with people judging me today. "Perhaps you fried your brain cells in a mist of Aquanet, girlie . I am pregnant, so the water will be fine. No lemon."

A low whistle sounded from the man next to me. She had called him Sabre, and it fit him. He appeared to be laid back as he slouched in the chair, but I didn't think it would take much for him to spring into action. Appearances were deceiving, and I knew that better than most people.

"Just bring a pitcher, Dee. Thanks, sweetheart." He winked at her, smoothing over whatever damage I had caused. He waited until she was far from the table with a smile on her lips before he leaned forward and crossed his arms. "That wasn't nice at all."

"She assumed. That's what you get when you make an ass out of yourself." I checked the dance floor again, looking for the girls. They were having a good time, but the men had made a coordinated effort to pair off. Meredith was all smiles as she danced next to a brunette with a man bun. After the day we'd had, her happiness made me smile.

"There ya go. Now, that's real pretty."

I don't know what came over me, but I stuck my tongue out at him.

"Don't do that unless you're planning on using it."

My thoughts were all over the place. The first one instantly went into the gutter, as I imagined getting down and dirty with him. The second made me feel guilty as I thought about Matt, my cheating husband. I was pregnant, and I didn't know who he'd been with. I'd have to get the baby checked to make sure that we were both safe. Matt hadn't cared, and I wasn't sure he would have told me about the women if I hadn't found out on my own.

"What, mama? You got that look. "

No witty retort came to me, so I remained silent as I pulled my phone from my pocket. I felt like I had to tell someone, and he was perfect. I didn't believe he would judge me, and I would never see him again, so there was no harm in letting him into my newfound turmoil. Opening the video, I made sure the sound was off before I handed it to him.

I didn't think he had expected a live porno, because he nearly dropped the phone on the table when it played. It was at the same time that the waitress brought over our drinks. She set a beer in front of him and a pitcher of water in front of me.

"Anything else, darlin'?" she asked him, placing her hand on his shoulder with familiarity.

I wondered just how familiar they were and then scolded myself for caring too much.

"Nope, we're good. Thanks, Dee." He rushed her away from the table so that he could continue to watch. I would have too if it wasn't my life.

The video ended, and he hit the button to play it again. "Let me guess: your husband, the groom, and a bridesmaid?"

"You're good. The bridesmaid is my cousin."

"Does the bride know?" he asked me, looking out onto the dance floor.

"No, I got lucky. She called off the wedding before I had to tell her because she said it was a bad idea not to be happy."

His gaze shifted back towards me. "You dodged a bullet there."

"It was easier to let her think she'd come up with this choice on her own. If it hadn't played out like that, I would have told her. She had a right to know, but I wanted to spare her the pain."

"What are you going to do?" I should have answered flippantly, but I didn't dodge his question like I should have. I answered honestly that I didn't know what was going to happen to me .

I felt like I had summoned the devil with one simple thought of Matt. My phone vibrated in Sabre's hand, and a cold dose of reality settled in between my shoulder blades.

Sabre stared at the picture of Matt that had popped up on the home screen as the phone vibrated with the incoming call. I thought Sabre was going to answer, but he passed me the phone at the last minute.

"Hey Matt," I said, answering. I stared straight ahead, shoulders pulled back, and my spine straight. I couldn't say anything I'd regret later on. Matt would use any tiny piece of this conversation to blow something out of the proportion, even if it was innocent.

"Where are you?" His voice sounded cold through the line, and I imagined icicles hanging off an imaginary string.

"About four hours from home. The girls were hungry, so we stopped to eat at some bar."

I was going to keep this as vague as possible. It was late in the evening, but I didn't want Matt to suddenly show up with Brandon and cause a scene with the bikers. They would be out of their league, and it would just end badly.

"You left a mess here, Grace. It's unlike you to take off with no word. Brandon's family is very upset that they paid for a wedding that didn't happen. They've threatened to sue, and your father laughed at them and walked, taking your aunt with him. You could have smoothed this all over and made Meredith follow through, but you were nowhere to be found in that shit show." His voice was still cold but slimy.

Analyzing his statement, I had to face the truth that he was right. Under normal circumstances, I would have pushed Meredith, citing some bullshit about what was best for her when I didn't have a clue. The guilt rolled over me in the same manner that the waves crested the beach. I felt drenched in cold, clammy sweat, and I was having a hard time breathing through the pain that gripped my chest.

"No, you're right. It was a mess." I hoped agreeing with him would get him to calm down.

"Wrong move, Grace. You made me look like a fool, and I didn't appreciate it."

"I looked for you, but you were missing. There wasn't any time." It was a lie.

"Hmm," he said. His tone implied that he didn't believe my story. "When are you coming home?"

"We'll probably get a room somewhere and then head back in the morning."

"Be home by noon. Don't be late." Click. The line went silent.

My hand shook as I slid the phone away from my ear and placed the screen down on the table. I didn't want to touch it, but my eyes wouldn't look away from it either. Matt had just threatened me for the first time in our marriage, and I wasn't sure how to react. I wasn't scared, nor did I believe Matt would physically harm me. This felt like some sort of setup, where no matter what I did, I was going to lose. It was getting harder to breathe in the dense air that surrounded me.

"Why do you let him treat you like that?"

I had forgotten Sabre was sitting next to me. I didn't know what to say, so I went with the truth. "That was new."

I'd met Matt as a sophomore in college. The girls in my program had gone out to a dorm mixer, and Matt and his friends had been the first people we'd met. We had been inseparable from then on. He had treated me like a queen, and I had gushed about how perfect our relationship was. Like a good friend, I thought I was doing the right thing by wishing the girls as much happiness as I had.

After graduation, we were married and bought a house. Our lives had moved forward together, and having a baby was just the next step.

I hadn't been honest with myself. Things had changed, and I had chalked it up to the baby. We were going to be parents in six months, and I kept telling myself that it was natural to adjust. We'd see it through and settle into a new normal. Together, like we had always done everything else. I either hadn't seen the red flags, or I had ignored them. I had a reason now to be wary.

"We have a clubhouse a few miles up the road. The four of you can stay overnight." It seemed like an innocent offer, but the smirk that settled at the corner of his lips said otherwise .

"No, thanks. I appreciate the offer, but we'll just head back and grab a hotel somewhere." I wasn't letting the girls into the clubhouse. They were old enough to make poor decisions on their own. Looking at the pairs on the dance floor, I thought that was exactly what was about to happen. They didn't need any encouragement.

"Can't blame me for trying to lure you into my bed."

It was nice to be flirted with, but I didn't take him seriously. "It was generous of you to donate your bed for the night, but I won't put you out."

He leaned forward and his eyes narrowed as he stared at me. "I wasn't donating shit. When you're in my bed, mama, you'll be lucky if you get any sleep. I'd rather you put me in." He winked at me and pulled away.

I wouldn't make a poor decision either. It was time to go. I looked out onto the dancefloor and caught Meredith's eye. She must have had the same thought because she gathered the girls, and we were back on the road a few minutes later.

We ended up pulling into a hotel and stayed the night—far away from a group of bikers.