Chapter 14

CHAPTER 14

"H ow did your meeting go with the solicitor?" Lovie asked Remington. She had been waiting for his return in the library because she knew they would have the most privacy there since the room was still in disarray.

Remington looked at the floor, passing a gaze over one shoulder and then the other, as if he could not believe the mess. "What are you trying to do here?"

"I'm organizing Rochester's books because he doesn't seem to have the time or care. Besides, we should be alone here, and I wanted to see you."

"You could see me in the drawing room." He gave her a wry smile—a bit of a challenge.

"But I can kiss you here." She stood and went to him. With her arms around his waist, she reached up on her tiptoes and molded her lips to his.

"I recall, two days ago, you did more than kiss me in the drawing room."

"Hush, someone might hear you."

"If they didn't hear us then, they can't hear us now," he whispered.

"Oh Lord, don't remind me. I do hope no one heard us together. You didn't warn me about the noise. Who would have thought that coupling came with so much gusto."

He chuckled, brushing her hair back behind her ear. "Oh, only everyone, my dear."

"You must think me an uneducated idiot."

"I neither think you uneducated nor an idiot. I think you're beautiful and funny. Have I told you I love you today?"

She laid her cheek against his chest, squeezing him tight and hoping he wouldn't be disturbed by her news. "I love you too, Remi."

He pulled back, holding her face between his hands. "What's wrong? Did something happen?"

"Sort of." She stepped away, waving him in, checking the hallway before she shut the door. "Don't kill yourself over the stacks, but do sit." He looked concerned but did as she asked.

"I'm sitting. Now, what is it?"

She bit her lip and wished she had cleared a path for pacing because she was caught between two stacks of books and a tea table. She folded one hand over the other repeatedly. With her gaze on the ceiling, she took a breath. "I've missed two months. One would not be cause for alarm, but two…"

"Two, what?" Then he grew silent, and she looked at him with trepidation, but what she saw took her breath away. He was smiling. Joyfully smiling. "Are you certain?"

"Well, I'm certain how late I am, and I do feel different. Not quite sick, but queasy at times. I thought perhaps it was my nerves." She stopped fidgeting, her brow tightly drawn.

He stood, tripped over a book, bent to pick it up, then tossed it on the table—all in stride—to get to her. He enfolded her in his arms. "You thought I'd be upset, didn't you?"

"I couldn't be sure. But to tell you the truth, I'm not sure how I feel. We're not married. What will people think?"

"They'll think we're in love." He pressed a bruising kiss on her mouth and then released her. He searched the room, rubbing his chin as if gathering his thoughts. "This changes things."

"No argument there."

"I had thought to marry you when I returned from the States after I closed up my business there."

Her heart sang. "Then you're not going back?"

He turned abruptly. "No, I am going back, but I can't wait for spring weather. I'll need to find travel soon."

"It's not even March yet. You can't go." The more she thought on it, the angrier the whole idea made her. "How can you leave me here with child?"

"Lovie, I'll be back before the babe is born. I never meant to stay in England until you happened to me. Does that not soften your annoyance at the inconvenience?"

"Inconvenience?"

"Not this." He stepped forward, placing a hand on her flat belly.

"I won't wait for you. I'll marry someone else." She said defiantly, in the same way an irrational person says silly things they don't mean.

He smiled at her tenderly. "And you think I'd let this imaginary man live? I wouldn't just kill him. I'd torture him," he said, teasing her, rubbing a work-worn thumb over her cheek.

"Then I won't marry you until you return."

"You will. You must, for the baby's sake."

"It will be legitimate if you return before the birth. You can't argue that, except you will because you also cannot promise you'll make it by then, can you?"

"Nothing in life is certain. You and I both know that. But this"—he pointed between them—"this is certain. Our love is certain."

Pain and fear warred inside her. She could not accept that he'd leave her. "Give me time to think. I'm swimming in heartache."

He hugged her to him, cradling her head against his chest. The steady rhythm of his heart brought her rapid pulse under control. After she turned twenty-five, she discovered something rich. It wasn't that she had waited to marry. She thought she would never marry. No one had ever come close to tempting her with the offer of marriage. But deep inside, she knew the first time she laid eyes on this man, her life was changed forever.

* * *

Remington remained with them for the time being, and for three days after her announcement to him, he said nothing about marriage.

She took it to mean that perhaps he had decided to stay after all. Thanks to Hudson's suspicious glances, she imagined he had been the one to ensure she and Remington had no further private contact. He couldn't know that it didn't matter because the damage, as it were, was already done.

She rubbed her belly, smiling secretly, wondering how on earth this lovely thing as falling in love had happened to her. She would forever thank God for the rain.

She was still wearing her secret smile after breakfast when she walked into her bed chamber and witnessed Margaret fussing over a dress lying across the freshly made bed. Margaret lifted the hem of a green velvet gown to show her the delicate gold applique gracing the edge like tatted lace.

"What is the lovely gown for?" she asked the maid.

"I believe it's a special gown for a special day. We've little time. Would you care for me to help you dress?"

Just then, the doorknob rattled, and a knock sounded. "May I?" Rochester said loud enough to be heard through the door.

"Come," Lovie called over her shoulder.

Rochester poked his head in, wearing a silly grin. "Would you like me to give you away or Hudson? I thought I'd ask since allowing Hud close to Hawke might put your wedding night in danger."

"My… wedding night?"

"You are getting married, I hear."

"Today?" She'd spoken of none of this to Rochester or Hudson.

"It's all arranged. I suggest you make quick work of the frippery." He smiled like the Cheshire cat.

"It's not arranged. Where is Remi… I mean Hawke?"

"Remi?" Rochester chuckled, opening the door all the way. "Oh, Lovie, you are in deep." He looked at the maid. "Miss Margaret, do you mind?"

The poor girl was constantly being asked to leave a room. The fact that Rochester had asked her to go left Lovie with a nervous roll in the pit of her stomach.

"Today is best, but if you insist on postponing things, I'm afraid it won't go well."

"Rochester? The man is leaving me. Did he tell you differently?"

"He's coming back, and as much as I'm certain your argument is valid, I'd think you'd want to marry before he leaves."

"My what?" she asked a bit too loud, her hands settled on her hips. "What argument? Who have you been speaking with?"

"You mostly. Do you think I'm dimwitted? Your brother is playing the fool for your sake, but Lovie, no one in this house is blind. Or deaf, I might add."

She felt heat rise up her neck, and her cheeks blazed.

"There's no need. Do you think I blame you? No. But I don't want to see you hurt. Am I speaking out of line?"

"Perhaps," she accused harshly and then relented. "Did he tell you?"

"No, I believe you just did."

She rolled her head and let out a hissing sigh.

"And I heard a few words of the argument you had. Before you get angry with me for eavesdropping, think about where you had the discussion."

The library where she and Rochester had discussed Hawke before. Rochester must have walked by when she raised her voice, and Hawke tried to shush her.

"All right. Why today?" she asked.

"He's leaving, Lovie."

Tears stung her sinuses and burned her eyes. "He can't. He just can't." She sat dejected on the bed next to the jade-green gown. She ran a hand over the velvet wishing it could be different.

"He must. He has to settle his affairs unless you'd like him to wait and then miss out on the first year of your child's life."

"I don't want that." She gave in to the embarrassment and decided that a candid discussion would be resolved faster. "I want him to take me with him. That's why I refused, in case you missed that part while you were drifting past the library." She flared her eyes at him.

"Not in your condition."

"It doesn't matter. He denied me the trip before he knew. He said it was too dangerous. Have you considered it's not quite spring yet, and the sea may be rough?"

"As I said, he can go now and hope to return before the babe is born or wait and leave before your confinement ends and miss out on even more."

He was right. "Can I speak with him?"

"He's downstairs. I'll get him."

"Where's Hudson?"

"Watching him like a hawk, for lack of a better word."

Her lungs deflated. "Hud knows."

Rochester didn't comment, just left the room to find Remington. But in the end, it didn't matter because they were right. She needed to marry before Remington left, and the fact that he had planned and managed to accomplish a small church gathering at none other than St. George's Hanover Square was a feat for a wizard. Margaret had helped with the shop-made dress, placing her own touches on the gown and adjusting the seams to fit correctly.

There had been little time for revelry because the odious man had acquired a ticket on a merchant ship heading out the very next day.