30. Logan

CHAPTER 30

LOGAN

My only day off this week is almost over and I lie in bed, anxious, because Sasha promised he’d speak to Vlad. But the glow of my phone illuminating the empty space beside me is my only unlikely companion tonight. It's been hours since Sasha swore to call, to finally let me know how it went with his brother. But silence greets me every time I check the phone.

With a frustrated sigh, I set it on the nightstand, the clunk echoing through my small apartment. Oddly, this place feels too big, too quiet without Sasha's laughter bouncing off the walls, without his silly British slang confusing me at every turn. He hasn't been here enough times, but already he’s embedded himself into every inch of this place, making it almost impossible to be here without him.

I close my eyes, willing sleep to come, but it evades me like a shadow. My mind drifts to Sasha, picturing him pacing nervously, his hands running through that soft blond hair as he works up the courage to confront Vlad. But deep down, I know the truth.

He chickened out again.

Just like last time. And the time before that. Always an excuse, always a reason to keep hiding, to keep pretending we don't mean something to each other. I offered to do this with him, but he refused, saying he needed to do this alone.

I roll over and I press my face into the pillow, the fabric cool against my skin.

Ma, am I doing the right thing?

Is this even going to work between us?

But again, silence is the only response.

Tomorrow, I'll have to talk to Sasha. Maybe persuade him to tell Vlad together. But for now, all I can do is lie here in the emptiness of the bed that’s a reminder of the young man who should be filling it.

As I drift into a restless slumber, Sasha's face haunts my dreams—those green eyes filled with fear, that gentle spirit. I reach for him, but he slips through my grasp, always just out of reach.

The shrill of my phone jolts me awake. My heart’s pounding against my rib cage as I fumble for the device, hoping to see Sasha's name on the screen, but instead, it’s Vlad. Immediately, all my senses come alive. I don’t know what time it is but I do know it’s dark out. Still, I feel like after my first shot of espresso in the morning when I hit the Answer button.

"Logan." Vlad’s voice is cold, devoid of emotion. "I’m looking for Alexander. Has he talked to you today, stopped by maybe?"

I sit up, my mind racing. Why would Vlad think Sasha would stop by here?

Did he find out about us?

"No, he hasn’t," I reply, keeping my tone steady despite the pounding pulse. "Is everything alright?"

Vlad's silence is deafening. "He has not come home," he finally supplies. "I thought perhaps he might have contacted you."

Fear grips my chest, icy tendrils wrapping around my heart. I check the time and it’s almost two. And Sasha's somewhere out there. Without me. At this hour.

"Look, no, he hasn’t contacted me today. Did something happen?" I venture.

"Never mind," Vlad dismisses my question. "Goodnight, Mr. McKenna."

"Hold on," I blurt out, desperation clawing at my throat. "I can help search for him. Let me—"

"That won't be necessary," Vlad cuts me off, his words laced with finality. "It is your day off, after all. Sasha is just having another one of his fits. I will see you tomorrow."

The line goes dead, the quiet that follows claustrophobic. I stare at the phone, my mind spinning.

Does Vlad not care about his own brother?

Why wouldn’t he accept my help?

I try to call Sasha, but it goes straight to voicemail. Again and again, I dial his number, each unanswered ring a twist of the knife in my chest. I pull up the tracker app, but all I see the mocking location unidentified .

Fuck.

Does he know Vlad monitors him through his phone?

Did he ditch it on purpose or did he figure out how to turn off the app?

As the night drags on, sleep eludes me, my thoughts consumed by Sasha's face, his smile, that beauty mark on his cheek, the way his body fits perfectly against mine. The decision crystallizes in my mind, a glimmer of clarity amidst the chaos.

I won't wait for Sasha anymore. I'll march into that office tomorrow and turn in my resignation, consequences be damned.

The next morning when I report for work, I’m tired and weak from the lack of sleep. The words I’ve been rehearsing for Vlad are on my tongue, convoluted and not ready to come out. The mansion is like a fortress of cold stone and secrets as I approach. Suddenly unfamiliar. The air crackles with tension, an electric current of unease that sets my nerves on edge.

The first thing that stands out are the obvious armed men patrolling the grounds, their faces grim and eyes watchful. The usual stillness is replaced by what feels like a bustle of the military.

On the way inside, I stop a security guard with a familiar face. "Hey, any news about Sa—Alexander?"

He shakes his head, expression impassive. "No news."

My stomach twists into knots.

Ivan intercepts me at the door, his usually stoic, stony face creased with what looks a lot like worry. I never thought I’d see the guy expressing any kind of emotion. I always thought he was made of rock.

"Mr. Solovey needs to speak to you," Ivan drones out.

I nod and follow him.

Each step toward Vlad's office feels like a march to my own death, my heart hammering against my ribs. I'm ready to resign no matter what happens next. If Vlad doesn’t want my assistance as Sasha’s security detail, he can’t stop me if I’m not his employee anymore.

Yes, things look very crystal clear in my mind…until I step inside Vlad’s office. Immediately, the scent of expensive cigars and whiskey washes over me. Vlad stands at his desk, the line of his shoulders rigid with barely contained rage. He’s dressed in navy slacks and crisp, white shirt with sleeves rolled up, as if he’s ready for war. There’s a stack of papers in his right hand.

"Logan." My name is a snarl on his lips. "Come in."

The door behind me shuts.

I move closer, my eyes meeting the man’s gaze. "Care to explain these?" He slaps the papers on the desk and they scatter like pieces of the puzzle across the polished wood.

My breath catches in my throat, a wave of nausea crashing over me. Intimate moments with the brush of skin against skin—all laid bare, all reduced to a tawdry expose, a damning proof of the forbidden relationship Sasha and I share. All captured in the glossy photos in front of me.

For a second, I forget to breathe. I just stare at the images, trying to keep it together, trying not to let myself get too emotional over this revelation.

Vlad’s eyes are blazing with fury when I look back up at him.

Shame and anger war within me, a vortex of conflicting feelings. How dare they invade our privacy? How dare they use this as a pawn in their twisted games? How dare they? Whoever they are.

"I asked you a question," Vlad grits out. "I. Want. An. Explanation."

"Vlad, I..." My words falter, the speech I've rehearsed a thousand times turning to jelly on my tongue. "It's not what you think." Why did I say that?

Vlad's lips curl into a mean sneer. "Really? Because it looks like you have been fucking my little brother behind my back." He rounds the table and stalks closer. Although he’s not much bigger, his presence is oppressive. "So tell me, McKenna, what exactly am I supposed to think?"

I swallow hard. "I never meant for this to happen," I begin, my voice sounding strained. "It just did. He is lonely—"

Vlad cuts me off with a harsh laugh. "So because he was lonely, it gave you the right to seduce him?" His words are a knife, twisting in my gut, making me bleed.

"It wasn't like that," I protest, but even to my own ears, the excuses ring hollow. What the fuck is wrong with me? Why can’t I just tell him how it is?

Vlad closes the distance between us entirely, his face mere inches from mine. His eyes bore into me, cold and unforgiving. "Then what was it like, Logan? Enlighten me."

I open my mouth to respond, but before I can utter a sound, Vlad's fist connects with my jaw. Pain explodes through my skull, stars dancing across my vision. I stumble back, barely catching myself on the edge of the chair.

Silence falls.

I blink to rehabilitate my vision. The blur begins to recede and when the image of Vlad is clear, he’s breathing heavily, his face filled with anger.

"Fair enough," I rasp out, tasting blood on my tongue as I rub my jaw.

"You lied to me," he says in a low, deceptively calm voice. "You betrayed my trust, and for what? A quick fuck with my baby brother?"

"It's not like that," I repeat, my voice stronger now, fueled by a growing anger of my own. "What Sasha and I have is real. I like him." Saying it out loud feels important.

"You what?"

"I like him. I’m ready to resign."

"Come again?"

"I want to be with him. I understand that I can’t do that while I’m in your employ. So, I resign."

Vlad’s face is a strange combination of harsh lines and surprise. I can’t read him. I can’t tell what’s a bigger shock to him—Sasha liking men or Sasha liking me.

"I am going to end you, Logan," Vlad hisses out.

"Do you even understand how invasive this is for him?" I gesture at the photos. "He’s been trying to talk to you for weeks now. Trying to tell you who he is, trying to get your damn blessing."

"Blessing to be with a washed-up former cop?"

It hurts. Hurts so bad, but I can't just give up. Can't give up Sasha. "It’s not your fucking place to judge whom he likes."

Vlad dares to take a step in my direction again and I’m ready to punch him back if I must. "I do not care who Sasha fucks," he spits, "but you should have known better than to shit where you eat, Logan. Did you really think you two could keep this a secret?"

I straighten, meeting Vlad's gaze head-on. "I have feelings for him," I say simply, the truth of it ringing in my bones. "And he has feelings for me. That's all that matters."

"No, you dumb piece of shit. What matters is the fact that you two did not even bother to hide it well. My enemies have been able to get a gazillion photos. How is that protecting Alexander? You had one job Logan and you fucked it up. And now I don’t know where my brother is."

I hear Vlad loud and clear all of a sudden. "I’m here. I’ll help to look for him."

"Do you not think I have enough men to scour the city?"

"They don’t know Sasha as well as I do."

Vlad opens his mouth to retort, but before he can speak, the shrill of his phone on the desk shatters the tension. He snatches it, his eyes never leaving mine as he answers.

"Vlad speaking," he barks.

I watch as his expression shifts again. This time a flicker of fear passes over his features before they harden once more. He listens for a moment, turning away from me, his knuckles white around the phone, jaw clenched tight. Then he ends the call with a curt, "I understand."

The silence that follows is deafening. Vlad spins around, his face becoming a mask of grim determination.

"They have Sasha," he says, his voice flat, emotionless.

The blood drains from my face as Vlad's words sink in. "What do you mean, they have Sasha?" My voice trembles. "Who?"

Vlad's eyes are cold. "The people who sent those photos... They asked if I enjoyed the show." He pauses.

My heart pounds in my chest, a sickening rhythm of fear and guilt. "What do they want?"

"They said they would let me know when they are done having fun with him."

No, no... This can't be happening.