5. Luke

5

LUKE

H is mother’s dinner was perfect, as always. He marveled at all she did for their family. Even with three extra at the table, she didn’t blink or falter. Talk around the table had been lively, with everyone but Luke and Nolan competing for attention. Abby had remained quiet as well, unless someone directly asked her a question. She’d seemed flummoxed when Jack asked her to cut up his piece of turkey but had done as he asked. He could only imagine how hard it must be to navigate motherhood when they weren’t hers. She hadn’t raised them from the moment they were born, watching carefully to see all their traits and idiosyncrasies as he had with Lily. Being thrust into it all in the middle must be terrifying. He vowed to be a better neighbor. Tomorrow, he’d repair the fence.

After dinner, his brothers pitched in to clean and put everything away while their mother rested in the living room watching the movie Elf with Lily and Jack snuggled next to her on the couch. Sophie had curled up in an easy chair, her cheek resting on the arm.

Meanwhile, Luke and his father had gone out to feed the horses and chickens. When they’d completed their chores, Luke and Walter headed back toward the house. At the porch, Walter hesitated.

“Sit out here with me for a minute?” Walter asked. “I’ll grab us some beers. I want to talk to you about something.”

“Sure thing.”

His dad hurried off to fetch the beverages. Luke sat in one of the rocking chairs, content in the quiet after the busy day they’d had. Walter returned with two bottles of beer, popped them open, and handed one to his son. Walter settled into the rocking chair next to him.

“What’s up?” Luke took a long draw from his beer.

“I’m supposed to be retired. Right?”

“Supposed to be? I thought you were.”

“You know what I mean.”

Luke waited for his father to continue, knowing it was best to be patient. Walter Hayes didn’t do anything fast.

“Yeah, well, I thought I might find myself a new project,” Walter said. “More of a good deed type of thing.”

“Okay? What did you have in mind? Volunteering at church or the food bank?”

“Nah. Something bigger than that. It’s been weighing on my mind, actually. As a man who considers himself to be a good Christian man, I haven’t really been acting that way.”

“How so?” His father was the best man Luke knew, except for maybe Nolan, who was practically a saint.

“We let Ramona worry herself, possibly to death, about how to keep a roof over those kids’ heads. A roof that’s not in the greatest shape, I might add. I sat over here, retiring.” He made air quotes around the word retiring . “While that poor girl needed help. I’m telling you, that house is falling apart.”

“Where are you going with this?”

“You remember how much fun we had remodeling your mother’s kitchen?”

“Sure.” It had been fun. He and his father, with occasional help from the other boys, had had a blast. They’d done pretty much everything themselves except for plumbing and electricity and bringing in the granite slabs to the countertops. He and his father didn’t talk much, but they didn’t have to. They understood each other in a way that only two people so alike could. Both of them loved this land and their farm and their family in a quiet, steady way.

“I’ve been thinking we should do some repairs and remodeling over there for Abby. That kitchen’s a mess. The roof needs patching. And there’s termites in the porch. Won’t be long before they make their way into the house. They’ve got leaks in multiple places, not to mention the state of the bathrooms.”

He stared at his father, shocked at the suggestion. “Huh. Okay. Interesting.”

“What do you think?”

“It’s not a terrible idea,” Luke said. “But how do we pay for it? Even doing most of the work ourselves, the costs are significant.”

“I spoke with Logan earlier. Ramona had a small life insurance policy. Part of it went into college accounts for the kids, per Ramona’s request. But there’s enough left to fix up the house. That is, if Abby wants that. She may be planning on selling and getting out of Dodge.”

The idea of her taking children away from their home physically pained Luke. “She said she won’t do that.”

“That right?”

“Yeah, I asked her. She said it would be unconscionable to take the children away from their home.”

“See there? That Abby Parker’s good people. More reason to help her out. She’s given up all her plans to come here and take on two kids and a ramshackle farmhouse.”

“It’s a lot of work,” Luke said. “It could take months and months.”

“Not if we can get your brothers on board, as well as some of my buddies down at the store.”

By the store, he referred to Max’s shop. It was a long tradition that his father and three of his cronies hung out there, playing checkers or gossiping. Or both.

“Me and the boys—we’re all getting fat and lazy,” Walter said. “What’s that they say? If you don’t use it, you lose it. I’m losing it by the minute.”

Luke chuckled. The men to whom his father referred were hardly fat. They’d all worked hard all their lives, on farms or construction, and deserved to rest or enjoy themselves.

“Listen to me, kid. I sat over here fat and happy while Ramona had the whole world on her shoulders. Like I said, maybe it’s what weakened her heart. We don’t know.”

“It was hereditary.”

“Maybe so. Maybe not. All I know is that I wasted an opportunity to give back to our community—to someone who needed it. Someone we considered a friend and a neighbor. And now Abby’s come here to take care of these kids instead of getting on with her own life. Her sacrifice is inspirational, don’t you think?”

He supposed it was. But what choice did she have? She couldn’t walk away from the children when she was all they had.

“I figure if we all pitch in, we can have that place fixed up by spring.”

“Okay, sure. As long as it doesn’t interfere with my work here.”

“We’ll have to come up with a plan for the kitchen—have her pick out what cabinets and granite she wants and that kind of thing. It’ll take months for stuff to come in, but we can fix the porch and roof as soon as the weather allows.”

“Let’s do it. If Abby wants us to, obviously,” Luke said. “Maybe she wants to use the money some other way.”

“It’s worth asking her, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, I’m in.”

Luke had a feeling it might be a hard sell. Abby was proud. Hopefully not too proud to accept help when offered.

“You want to do what?” Abby’s gaze darted back and forth between Grace, Walter, and Luke. They’d asked her to join them in Walter’s study and had presented the idea to her.

“You’re offering to renovate the house?” Abby asked when no one answered.

“That’s right,” Grace said.

“But why?” Abby asked.

“Because people always say they wished there was something they could do to help when tragedy strikes,” Walter said. “And this is something we can do.”

“That old place needs attention,” Luke said. “And we’re the ones to give it to it.”

“How do I pay for it?” Abby asked.

“We thought you could use the funds from the life insurance policy.”

“It’s not a lot,” Abby said.

“With us doing the labor, we can make it happen,” Luke said.

“Except for the roof, electrical, and plumbing,” Walter said. “Those we have to hire out.”

“I’ll put a spreadsheet together,” Luke said. “Outlining everything that needs to be done and a timeline.”

“How do you know how to do any of this?” Abby asked.

“We just do,” Walter said. “Mostly because my dad taught me, and I taught my boys.”

“Well, I don’t know what to say.” Abby’s voice cracked. “I’ve never been presented with a kinder offer. I’m flabbergasted.”

“To be honest, it’s kind of selfish of me,” Walter said. “I should have been a better neighbor.”

Abby’s eyebrows raised. “You’ve been wonderful to her and the kids. And now to me.”

Grace moved her gaze to Abby. “We know you’re up against a lot, and we want you to understand you’re not alone. Ramona and her kids are family to us. Which means you are too.”

“Don’t you all have enough work of your own without taking this on?” Abby asked.

“We have time enough,” Walter said.

“How will I ever repay you?” Abby asked.

“By raising Ramona’s kids,” Grace said. “They need you. And as part of your village, we’re here to help make sure you have what you need to do so.”

Abby brought both hands to her mouth, pressing into her bottom lip. Tears flooded her eyes as she shook her head. “I’ve never heard of anything so outrageous. Or wonderful. To be honest, I’ve been worried about how to make ends meet. I need a job.”

“I have an idea about that,” Grace said. “I’ll put a call into Doc Ford first thing tomorrow and ask if he needs any help. He’s a good friend of ours.”

“He’s been jealous about all the fishing I’ve been doing,” Walter said. “So, I’m pretty sure he’ll jump at the chance.”

“All I can say is, thank you.” Abby swiped under her damp eyes. “Just this morning, I was thinking I didn’t know if I could do this but now, I feel a lot better. I mean, I still question that I’m the person for this job—those precious children deserve the best and I’m not that—but your kindness has made me feel less alone.”

“Welcome to being a parent,” Luke said. “We all just do the best we can and ask God for a little help.”

“Sometimes he shows up through other people,” Abby said. “And he sure has tonight.”

Luke offered to walk Abby and the kids home, and she accepted, saying she was afraid of the dark, and how many types of wild animals were out there this time of night, and did any of them like to eat women from the city.

He’d laughed at that and assured her that the animals were as scared of her as she was of them. “Regardless, let me walk you back. I have a good flashlight and can get you guys settled before I head back home.”

Abby hugged Grace and Walter good night before calling to the children that it was time to go. They’d had their dessert already, and Jack was yawning so wide Abby was afraid his face might break in two.

Sophie and Jack joined them in the mudroom, obediently putting on their jackets, hats, and mittens. Lily looked up at Sophie with pure adoration. “Bye, Sophie.”

“Bye, Lily. See you soon, okay?” Sophie held out her arms, and the two girls hugged.

Jack, who seemed oblivious to being left out, called for Rufus, who had been fast asleep by the fire during the movie. He came trotting in now, wagging his tail.

Luke told Lily that Mimi was going to put her to bed tonight, and she didn’t make a fuss. She was a flexible little girl, thank God. “Will you come and see me when you get home?” Lily asked him.

“Yes, but you’ll be asleep by then.”

“It’s okay, as long as I know you’re coming back,” Lily said.

Something about the way she said it kind of broke his heart. Between her own mother and now Ramona’s passing, she must be worried that he, too, would disappear. “I always come back.” He kissed the top of her head. “Be good for Mimi.”

“Okay, Daddy.” She turned to Jack, who had clipped Rufus’s leash to the dog’s collar. “Bye, Jack.”

“See ya, Lily.” Jack grinned as Rufus’s tail smacked his leg.

Soon, the four of them, plus Rufus, were making their way through the snow, following the path they’d made earlier as a guide. Walter had sent them out with two flashlights, making it easy enough to see where they were going. No more snow had fallen during the day, and the sky was clear and full of stars tonight. Temperatures had dropped considerably.

“It’s so cold,” Abby said. “My California blood doesn’t know what’s happening.”

“Yeah, all the more reason to make sure your house is repaired as it should be.”

They reached the fence dividing the two properties. Luke unlatched the gate and waited for everyone to pass through before closing it again. No one spoke as they trudged across the yard to the back door of the house. When they reached the back patio, Sophie ran ahead, opening the door to the kitchen and turning on the light. Jack followed behind, still holding tight to Rufus’s leash.

“You guys go upstairs and get your jammies on,” Abby said. “And brush your teeth. I’ll be up to tuck you in shortly.”

“What are jammies?” Jack’s forehead wrinkled as he looked up at Abby.

“Jammies? Pajamas,” Abby said quickly. “Or pj’s. What do you call them?”

“Pj’s,” Jack said. “My mom calls them that.”

Sophie’s expression turned stoic. “C’mon Jack. Let’s go.”

“Can Rufus come?” Jack unhooked the leash from Rufus’s collar.

“Yes, but leave that here by the door.” Abby held out her hand. “So, it’s handy when we take him out in the morning.”

Jack did as she asked and then followed his sister up the creaky stairs with Rufus on his heels.

“Seems like Jack has a new best friend,” Luke said.

“Seems so. I’m glad they’ve taken to each other like that.” Abby hung her jacket on one of the hooks in the mudroom. “You want to stay and get warmed up for a few minutes?”

Her wistful tone touched him. She didn’t want him to go just yet. To his surprise, he didn’t want to leave either. “Sure. For a few minutes.”

Luke took off his jacket and left it in the mudroom before joining her in the kitchen.

“You want a drink?” Abby asked. “There’s some hard stuff in the liquor cabinet. Don’t ask me how I know.”

He laughed. “Nah. But I’ll have a beer if you have one.”

She nodded and went to the refrigerator, yanking it open and pulling out two bottles of beer. He peeked around her shoulder. The fridge was bare but for a few items. Why hadn’t his mother sent her home with leftovers? With all the excitement, she must have forgotten. He made a mental note to bring some by in the morning.

“I’m glad Rufus is helping Jack,” Abby said. “There’s nothing like the love of a pet to help heal a heart.”

“He was always asking Ramona for a dog, but she didn’t think she could handle a puppy with everything else she had to deal with.”

“I didn’t know that,” Abby mumbled under her breath. “So many things I don’t know.”

He leaned against the back of the sink, thinking of what to say that would help her. “You’ll catch on quick. It’s human nature to step up when our kids need us to. Or, most, anyway.” Lily’s mother had been the opposite, running away and abandoning her child.

Abby plopped down on one of the stools that had been tucked under the island. “Does Lily’s mother ever come around?

“God, no. Haven’t heard from her since the divorce papers were signed. She gave up all parental rights to Lily. It’s in the agreements, thanks to Logan. I didn’t want to take a chance she’d change her mind.”

“Smart. May I ask how long you were married?”

“Just shy of a year when she left,” Luke said. “She was a party girl—always wanted to be out. I’m a homebody, so it wasn’t a good match. She’d told me she didn’t want to get pregnant, but I thought she’d change her mind. She didn’t. When she found out she was pregnant, I had to beg her not to—” He couldn’t even say the word.

“That’s awful. I’m sorry.”

“When I think about not having Lily—I can’t imagine life without her. But I wanted her to have a mom. It’s not right.”

“I know the feeling. That’s what I want for these two upstairs. Sadly, they have only me.” She covered her mouth with her hand, clearly trying not to cry.

“Hey now, you’re doing well.” Instinctively, he crossed the kitchen to stand beside her. “You’re brave, and that’s what’s going to make all the difference for Ramona’s kids.”

She turned to him, her long legs dangling over the stool and her disheveled hair falling around her shoulders. Cheeks that had been kissed by the cold air flushed a pretty shade of pink. “Brave. I don’t feel brave at all. I’m terrified.” Tears leaked from the corners of her eyes. She brushed them away with the palm of her hand.

“Please, don’t cry.” Not realizing he was even doing it, he reached out to tuck a wayward bit of her hair behind her ears.

Abby didn’t move, gazing up at him with big eyes. Her mascara and eyeliner had smudged from crying, and yet she looked beautiful. He was close enough to feel her tremble. His gaze traveled to her full mouth. Her lips parted slightly. Intoxicating perfume. Vanilla mixed with gardenias, maybe? A heady smell. One that made him dizzy with longing.

It hit him hard. The truth of it as obvious as the irresistible woman in front of him.

He wanted to kiss her.

He hadn’t felt this in a long time. This overwhelming desire to pull a woman into his arms and kiss her until all her tears dried up. In truth, he hadn’t been certain he would ever want a woman again. Not after Sarah left. She made him feel like a wormy, bruised apple that had fallen to the ground before fully ripe—a piece of fruit no one wanted. Max would throw it away if had somehow made it to his store, never daring to place it on display at the top of the heap to entice a buyer. Luke was no longer shiny or without scars or holes. And he no longer tasted sweet.

Yet the way she was looking at him made him wonder. Did she see more than his bruises and scars? Could she see past the holes in his heart and glimpse the man he’d been once, before his heart had been broken? A man of dreams and desires and hope for the future. Once, before he’d given everything to Lily, he’d believed that for the right woman, he could be the answer to her prayers.

“What is it?” Abby asked in a whisper. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“I was wondering if I look like a rotten apple.” He blurted it out before he could censor himself.

She laughed. “What?”

Flushing with heat and embarrassment, he dropped his forehead into his hand. “Forget I said that.”

He felt cold fingers on his forearm, tugging. “Luke, look at me.”

His arms dropped to his side, and he stared helplessly at her, knowing it was too late to act tough. He’d let her see him. Too soon. It had to be.

“You’re not a rotten apple,” Abby said. “Not something to be discarded or left to rot. I’ve only known you for a day, and I know already the kind of man you are.”

“What kind of man is that?” Luke asked in a croak.

“The kind of man who would be the answer to someone’s prayer.”

His mouth fell open. Had he said that aloud? No, he couldn’t have. Yet she’d known. “How did you know I was thinking that?”

She lifted one shoulder in a half-shrug. “I don’t know. I just did.”

Before he could think of anything to say, Jack came running into the kitchen with Rufus right behind him. “Abby, we’re out of toothpaste.”

The two of them jumped apart like two schoolyard children caught kissing behind the bleachers.

“Oh, okay.” Abby stood, straightening her sweater. “I’ll be right up to help.”

“I could just skip brushing my teeth tonight,” Jack said diplomatically.

“I don’t think so.” Abby smiled, reaching out to ruffle his hair. “Go on upstairs. Give me two minutes, and I’ll join you.”

“Okay. Night, Luke.” Jack and Rufus headed out of the kitchen, but at the last moment, the little boy halted and turned back to look at them. “Why were you so close together? Does Abby have something in her eye?”

Luke and Abby exchanged an amused glance.

“Yes, she had something in her eye,” Luke said, trying not to laugh. “I was helping her get rid of it.”

“Oh, okay. Well, I hope you can. I hate it when I have something in my eye.” With that, Jack and Rufus bounded into the hallway and rushed up the stairs, their footsteps pattering on the wood floors.

Abby stood from where she’d been seated on the stool. As she did so, her thighs brushed up against his. Instead of moving away, she remained, tilting her chin slightly as she looked up at him. “Have we lost the moment, or are you still going to kiss me?”

A shot of yearning coursed through him. He swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry. Could he do this? Did he have enough courage to let her see him? The real him, with his giant, bruised heart that wanted so badly to love and be loved and yet was afraid? So afraid. But no. He must push past the fear or risk losing his opportunity. “Can I? Would you like me to, that is?”

Abby tossed her hair behind her shoulders, her expression somewhere between fear and abandon. “I would like a kiss. Very much.”

“From anyone or just me?”

“I don’t see anyone else here.”

Standing so near her, he realized she was taller than he’d thought when he first saw her charging across the snowy field. The perfect height for him. Her hair smelled of gardenias.

“Do you see anyone but me?” Abby asked, eyes sparkling.

“No, just you.”

“Then you have your answer.”

Luke drew closer, millimeter by millimeter. Heat radiated between them, reminding him of a sizzling summer day when the air shimmered above the concrete in a wavy mirage. She didn’t take her gaze from him, her eyes soft and lips slightly parted.

“You are beautiful.” He brushed the backs of his knuckles against her jawline. Her breath hitched. From his touch? Yes , he told himself. Yes. I did that.

A slight tremble rattled his chest, but he leaned in, his lips grazing hers. A tentative kiss, more a question than anything else. But she responded. She answered whatever doubts remained by wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him without anything close to hesitation. There was no question in her touch, only need. Abby was a woman who knew what she wanted from him and perhaps every other aspect of her life.

He returned the kiss, marveling at the sweet taste of her mouth. Parts of him that had felt dead, or at least in a very deep sleep, awakened. Something astounding came to him, nearly knocking him over from the sheer shock of it. This moment right here was one of the reasons he was alive. To kiss this woman. It was clear as could be.

When they finally pulled apart, he simply stared at her. Stunned. Helpless. At her mercy. His heart thumped so hard he felt sure she could see his chest moving despite his thick sweater.

“This is not how I thought the night would end.” Abby looked up at him with such vulnerability that a lump formed in the back of his throat. Her beauty stunned him. Made him forget his own name.

“Not in my wildest dreams.” Luke ran his thumb over her bottom lip. “Abby Parker, you are a surprise.”

“As are you, Luke Hayes.” She grinned. “If only I could tell teenage Abby that someday, smoking-hot Luke Hayes would blow her mind with the best kiss she’d ever had. She would not believe me.”

“The best one?” Luke flushed with heat, pleased beyond reason. “Are you sure?”

“I haven’t been kissed that much.”

He laughed. “I see. So, not a high bar?”

“Whatever bar there was in the past has been far surpassed.”

“Good to know. Although, I’ve never been one for complacency. I shall continue to up my game.”

“If you insist.” Abby ran a finger inside the collar of his sweater. “My expectations are now unreasonably high.”

Luke played with a lock of her hair and kissed a spot on her neck just below her dangling earring before reluctantly lifting his head and looking into her eyes. “I should go. You have to get the kids to bed. Even though I could stay like this forever.”

She blinked three times as if a spell had been broken, and her hands flew to her mouth. “Oh my God, I’m an awful person. They’re up there waiting for toothpaste.”

They laughed again. The kind of uncontrollable giggle that bubbles out of one during school or church and is impossible to subdue despite all efforts to do so. Finally, when they’d sobered slightly, he brushed his mouth to hers. “Good night, Abby Parker. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Before he could change his mind, he hurried out of the kitchen and into the mudroom, calling out to her before he went into the cold night. “Don’t forget to lock the doors.”