31. Raul

31

RAUL

I hated the way I had had to leave Monica, but there was more I had to do before I could go to her. What do I do with her? The vampires were coming, and she couldn't be here. I didn't want her anywhere near them. Anywhere where they could possibly even get a hint of her scent. I turned the problem over and over while trying to focus on the next thing that I had to do.

In my haste, I had forgotten Sam's truck at Monica's house. On our way back home, I apologized to him and told him that I would take him up there to retrieve it in the morning. He shrugged and nodded, taking it all in stride. I was glad he didn't insist on getting it tonight.

I was worn down by the events of the day and I knew that leaving her like I did wouldn't have done me any favors. Right now, I knew that I was too distracted and heart-torn about the pack's losses to handle her.

I entered my neighborhood alongside Sam and instantly caught her scent. That was odd. She hadn't been to my cabin in forty- eight hours and her scent of sweet caramel had been much fainter, it shouldn't have been this strong.

As my house came into view, I saw that the front door was wide open, and Nora was sitting on the top landing of the steps. She had a white envelope in her grasp and was exchanging words with Ray who stood behind her.

I didn't have to hear their words to know something is wrong. I could sense it and smell it on both of them, on top of the fact that there is no doubt that Monica had been there. After I told her to stay put. Stay inside.

Damn it, woman. You're going to have to learn to listen to me. To fucking trust me.

I broke into a jog, running right up to my brother and sister, letting Sam trail behind.

"What?" I growled as soon as I was close. "And why didn't you come to the meeting? You're members of this pack too."

"We were about to leave, when I found this under your door," Nora said, staring at the white envelope in her hands. I saw that it had my name written in Monica's flowing script. "We've been debating. Ray thinks we should read it. I don't. It's clearly personal."

"Give me that thing," I urged, snatching the letter from her grasp. As I pried the envelope open I was surprised by how thick it was. This is no simple one page note. Monica and I had seen each other only three hours ago, so what was so urgent that she had had to write such a lengthy letter?

The moment I opened its contents my heart froze in my chest.

"My dear Raul,

I wish I didn't have to write this. I wish our situation weren't so complicated…

I was broken when you found me. Still picking up the pieces of my broken heart, which is why I moved to the mountain in the first place, where you and I met.

I thought I was moving to a peaceful place. My God, I couldn't have been more wrong. There are so many things I had never conceived of, never even dreamed possible.

Please, bear with me. Five weeks ago, I didn't believe there were creatures like you. Most humans would classify you as a monster, though, according to them, there's no such thing. Monsters are a product of somebody's wild imagination, meant to scare children into eating their lunch or behaving properly.

I know better now. There is such a thing as monsters. Only you're not one of them. You're the kindest person I've met in my whole life. Noble. Caring. Willing to give, even when you know that you won't get anything back. Which makes my decision unbelievably harder.

You're an Alpha now. I know why you faced your old Alpha. I admire it, but it's a great responsibility. You have to lead your people through everything, including battles against real monsters.

Raul, I can't imagine how I'd feel if, one day, someone knocked on my door and said, "Raul is gone." What would I do? How would I live without the man who showed me the meaning of care? How would I move on, knowing that the man who laughed in the face of death for me, had fallen prey to some ancient hate?

I wish that was all of it but there are other things I can't wrap my head around. That prophecy. I can't believe it. It's much too difficult for me to accept that somewhere, somehow, hundreds of years ago a witch was able to foresee my future. Maybe it's easier for you. I don't know. At any rate, I'm not going to pretend to be okay with it.

I left the part of your ‘weakness' for last, because maybe that's what baffles me the most. Death by a broken heart? I'm sorry, but that's impossible. You're human, Raul. Maybe not entirely, but you've got a human heart. The only case where a human can actually die of a broken heart is when they're in their eighties and suffer a traumatic loss. You're far too young for that.

I'm so sorry, Raul. It breaks my heart to leave you like this. You deserved a proper ‘goodbye.' I just can't muster the courage to offer it to you. I'm going back to the city to see if I can get my old job back. I don't want to stay in the Catskills anymore. I know I'm not strong enough and that running into you would throw me right back into your arms.

Take good care of yourself.

Love,

Monica"

The paper slipped through my shaking fingers. I watched it float towards the ground while my mind drifted back to a time that was etched into my memory. I dropped to my knees as I recalled the gut-wrenching sights of both my father and my grandfather on their death beds.

Skin and bone. Weak. Their voices hardly loud enough to be heard. Those once proud warriors of the Dawson pack had been reduced to pathetic creatures, with only one thing left to do, perish. Both had died of broken hearts and now the same fate had come for me. The same, slow, agonizing end. The wolf howled its loss.