26. Raven

TWENTY-SIX

RAVEN

Despite how much I thought I was prepared for this moment, I was truly mistaken. My hand claps over my mouth as my teeth sink into my tongue, reining back my gasp.

I’ve seen death, even before I came to Silvercrest Academy—it was everywhere in Shadowmoor—but this somehow feels different. Sure, he’s my brother, my blood, but he’s an asshole; yet he still matters.

Sure, I can’t forgive the shit he’s put me through, but the ability to stand back and watch him collapse to the floor in a heap of limbs proves far more difficult than I initially anticipated.

One of my guys squeezes my shoulder in an attempt to comfort me, but it does little to quell the nausea swarming in my gut and the panic rising in my chest. I can’t turn to see who it is, either. My gaze is locked on the three men, desperate for an opening to heal Sebastian like I promised.

I have to help him. I know I do. My magic thrums through my veins so strongly that even if I were unwilling, it would still force me to my knees to aid him. My magic and I are one, but sometimes it almost feels like it has its own mind and it’s different to mine. It’s like a compulsion to heal others, to activate to save lives. It sounds dumb, but at this moment, I know we are aligned.

Burton moves first, sweeping the fur cloak dramatically as he takes a step back from Sebastian’s lifeless body. “Come, Fitch. We have much to prepare. Everything has been approved from inside The Monarchy. We’re moving faster now. With or without the ruby, we can’t stop all that is in motion.”

“The body?” Fitch asks, casting an inconvenienced glance Sebastian’s way, and my blood boils.

“Send for one of the Institute boys to get rid of him,” Burton orders with a wave of his hand, effectively dismissing the mess he’s made as he heads to the stairway without a backward glance.

Fitch follows after him like the well-trained puppet he is, but I don’t immediately move when they’re out of sight. It takes everything inside of me to fight against my magic, which pleads for me to move now, but even if I did relent, the hand on my shoulder tightens as if sensing the battle inside of me.

“We have to think this through before we move from here,” Creed states, his voice barely more than a whisper. When I turn to glance at him, I find it’s his hand on my shoulder.

“I need to heal him,” I grind out, my chest tightening with every second I remain in place. My magic has a different plan altogether.

“I know, and you will, but are you doing it here, or are we going to move to a more secure location before someone from Shadowgrim Institute arrives to get rid of him?”

Fuck. He does have a point.

Swiping my free hand down my face, I sigh, trying to ground myself so I can think clearly, but the magic pulsing through my body makes it more difficult than usual.

“We should move him,” Eldon recommends, giving me a soft smile as Brax nods, and their willingness to help me aid him calms the storm brewing in my chest.

Maybe one of my worries was that one or more of the Bishops would intercept what I needed to do, and hearing them confirm the opposite allows my magic to settle. Not much, but enough to think a little clearer.

“Where?” Zane asks, straightening his shoulders as his brows crinkle.

“Are you okay? If you need to drop your magic, you⁠—”

“I’m good. For now. Once we’re outside, the fresh air might help me too,” he explains with a tight smile, and I know he’s pushing himself. For me. Again.

Maybe if I could use my mirror magic to conceal myself, that may help. Although, taking directly from him will only drain him the same.

My lips twist, indecision rippling through me, but the pointed stare he gives me confirms there’s no room for me to argue. I reach for the pendant around my neck, holding it tight and focusing on his magic concealed in there before releasing our connection. Taking a deep breath, I let my concern simmer down as I feel the magic drift over me. I don’t move away from the group, eager to stay close in case something goes wrong, and when it doesn’t immediately go to shit, I turn my attention back to the dead body that requires my assistance.

“You’re a goddamn menace, Dove,” he rasps, and I bite back the pleased smile on my face.

“Let’s head to the Gauntlet.” The second I say it, I’m certain it’s the right place to go.

The Bishops must agree with me because no one argues as we move as one toward Sebastian.

Coming to a stop before him, my knees buckle, the need to fall at his side and get to work overwhelming, but my men manage to keep me up without a word needed between us.

“I think I can use my telekinesis to hold him off the ground while projecting my invisibility through the connection,” Zane starts, and Brax grunts, cutting him off.

“Or I can just carry the fucker.”

My eyebrows rise at his offer, but before I can say a word, he swoops Sebastian over his shoulder with one hand while the other holds onto Zane to allow him to remain invisible.

“Can we trust you with him?” Eldon asks, quirking a brow at his friend. Under any other circumstance, I may have chuckled at the question and the entire scenario, but right now, the clock is ticking and we need to move as fast as possible.

“He’s almost irrelevant when he’s dead. It’s a shame Raven’s going to bring him back and piss me the fuck off, but I pledged an oath. Here’s me following through on that.”

I gulp, his words growing softer and more weighted as he speaks.

Nodding, I can’t find the words to show my appreciation, but Brax turns away anyway, not needing the recognition. He starts to move, each one of us remaining connected as we shuffle as quickly as we can toward the exit. The stairs take longer than usual with our measured steps, but we have to remain pressed against the wall and out of the way in case someone appears.

I don’t know whether we’re lucky or destined to make it out of here unscathed, but as we step out into the night air, we manage to miss any obstacles. Once we’re through the treeline, with a clear view of the Gauntlet, Brax releases his hold on the group, letting Zane’s magic wash off him as he marches toward the looming building ahead.

Glancing at Zane, I see the relief in his eyes, although the flash of worry at us being exposed is still prominent. It’s worth the risk, though. He needs to rest, and since we can’t head back to the house to recharge, this will have to suffice.

The rest of us follow suit, releasing Zane from the need to shield us all with his ability, and his footsteps instantly quicken as he directs his energy elsewhere.

As we reach the top of the Gauntlet, the cool air and stone steps come into view and I exhale slowly, eager to get to the center of the arena at the bottom so I can finally get to work.

“In here or through the gateway?” Brax asks, marching down the steps two at a time, and I race to be at his side.

“Through the gateway.”

The farther away from the academy we can get, the better. The compound isn’t nearly as far enough away as I would like, but for now, it will have to suffice.

Brax moves through the gateway without a backward glance, and if he hadn’t just reminded me of his pledged oath and promise to help me, I would be worried he was up to no good, but the moment I follow him, I find my gargoyle laying my brother down on the grass.

Gently? No.

Carefully? Definitely not.

Disregarding? Absolutely.

I don’t argue or complain as I finally get the relief of dropping to my knees beside Sebastian’s graying body. I sense Creed, Zane, and Eldon around me, making me feel whole, but I don’t turn to look at them as my magic takes over.

A chill runs down my spine, stiffening my bones as my hand presses against his chest. The need to touch someone while healing them has never crossed my mind before, but for some reason, with Sebastian, I can’t help it.

Darkness seeps into my veins, twisting and coiling with precision as I clench every muscle in my body, fighting against the pain that threatens to crush me in its grasp. My eyes flutter beneath my eyelids as my magic focuses on my brother.

The longing for warmth, brightness, and joy pounds through me, unrelenting as I feel my magic wash over him. Panic starts to kick in when I continue searching for him, leaving me certain that I waited too long.

A frustrated groan escapes from my lips at the same time and I feel the softest caress of warmth run up my arms. My head lolls forward, my mouth falling open as I let the feeling rush through me. It feels like I’m held in a warm embrace, the sun shining down on me on a late afternoon as butterflies dance in the sky around me.

It’s overwhelming, a complete contrast to where I was moments ago, and it’s all quickly taken away from me again as I blink my eyes open to look down at Sebastian.

My chest rises and falls rapidly as I stare at him, fingers tingling from where they rest against his academy-issued uniform. With my pulse ringing in my ears, doubt starts to take over when nothing instantly changes.

Don’t do this. Don’t do this to me. Don’t make me break my promise. My word is everything, even to assholes I don’t trust.

“You can get off me now.” The rasp of Sebastian’s voice startles me and I’m quick to retract my hands as Brax grunts from my side. I don’t need to look at my grumpy gargoyle to know he’s already regretting bringing my brother back.

“Are you okay, Dove?” Zane asks, crouching beside me as he soothes a hand down my back, and I nod.

“I’m okay. It felt harder than before but I don’t know why,” I admit, tucking a loose tendril of hair behind my ear.

“That would explain it,” Eldon mutters, making me frown.

“Explain what?”

He clears his throat, glancing at the others as the growing uncertainty inside of me makes itself known. “Your hair is completely black.”

Completely black? Fuck.

Bye-bye pink and girly, hello dark and dangerous.

“Where are we?” Sebastian asks, and I compartmentalize my hair to address it at a different time. He sits upright and my heart calms, seeing him in front of me once more. It’s a pity he pisses me off the second he opens his mouth, but that’s never going to change.

“We’re still on campus, but it’s not shielded by the wards here,” I explain, glancing around the tall, thick tree line and lush green shrubs.

It doesn’t seem to hold the same magic and wonder as it did the first time I came here to speak with Gia. So much more has happened since then, and their absence is truly noticeable now. Gone is the whimsical sense of adventure, and in its place remain plants and trees that are no longer filled with life.

The ground is scattered with brown, crunchy leaves, twigs, and branches falling around us. Even the lush green shrubs that first caught my attention seem darker and dimmer the more I look.

“Lyra,” Sebastian croaks, pulling my attention back to him, and my eyes widen. Before I can try to understand what he’s asking for, he continues, “He’s going to know it was her that aided me in being able to see through his magic.”

Fuck.

I don’t know what I’m supposed to say or do, but Lyra has helped me too. She can’t die at the hands of the enemy. I refuse.

Settling my gaze on my brother, I open my mouth to speak, but he cuts me off before I get a chance. “I can’t leave without her. I promised. You have to help me.”

“She doesn’t have to do shit,” Brax grunts, folding his arms over his chest as he looms over my brother. I can sense the desire to step between us if needed, but I shake my head gently as I look up at him. “Your deal was to bring him back from the dead. Nothing more,” he states, giving me a pointed look.

“Raven, please,” Sebastian rasps, ignoring Brax’s truthful statement.

“You realize it makes no sense for her to continue to help you after everything you’ve done,” Creed adds, and my eyes fall closed.

My magic battles inside me, reconfirming the worry from earlier. I have to follow my own heart and mind, not those of others. Even if they are my men, the missing pieces of my heart and soul—pieces I never would have imagined having the luxury of—I have to make this decision for myself.

“I’m not asking for forgiveness, Raven. I’m not even asking you to do this for me,” Sebastian pleads, emotion clogging his voice as his words thicken. “I’m asking you to help an innocent person who has clearly helped when you needed them to,” he pushes, stating the thoughts that were running in my mind.

I open my eyes. There’s no point in shielding myself from the world I already know I can’t hide from. I know my answer, whether I like it or not. Hiding from the moment is only delaying the inevitable.

“Where can I find her?”

Sebastian’s shoulders sag with relief as my men remain quiet around us. Slowly, he shakes his head, swiping a hand down his face. “You won’t be able to reach her until morning.”

“I could find her now,” I retort, not wanting to drag the situation out any longer than necessary. Waiting until morning only gives Burton more time to act.

“The professors’ quarters are impossible to access. You won’t be able to get there. If you’re willing to help, it will have to be in the morning, just like the other day when she helped you.”

I pinch the bridge of my nose, exhaustion threatening to claim me as the mess around us continues to grow. I haven’t forgotten the words Burton stated earlier, either. Whoever he’s working with in The Monarchy is allowing them access to push forward with their plans.

That’s another hurdle we’re going to have to face sooner rather than later, but maybe for tonight at least, it will keep him occupied.

“You’re going to have to hide out here for the night.” I look into my brother’s eyes and he nods, unfazed by a night in the forest. It feels like a stark contrast to the boy I met when I arrived here; one full of demands, selfishness, and a pompous attitude. “I’ll bring her to you, then you’re on your own,” I add, meaning every word, and that seems to be more than enough for him.

“I won’t go quietly,” he croaks, scrubbing the back of his neck as he exhales, eyes still locked on mine. Brax inches closer to him in a defensive manner, but I raise my hand, wanting my brother to explain further. He must sense the question without me saying it because he slowly rises to his feet, standing tall as he offers me his hand. Indecision flickers through my thoughts for a split second, but despite the uncertainty, I place my palm in his and he pulls me to my feet. “Whatever you need, whatever this battle requires, I’ll be there.”

“No,” I state with a shake of my head, and he completely ignores me as he glances at each of my men before boring his eyes into mine once more.

“I deserve to die, but not in that room. I deserve to die for a purpose greater than me. Raven Hendrix, I am Sebastian Hendrix, and I pledge to help with all that I am, all that I could be, and all I wish to be.”