Chapter Twenty-Two

The wedding had gone off without a hitch. Listening to Deck and Tori exchange their vows, seeing the looks on their faces, left Evan wondering if he would ever know that kind of love. The feeling he'd had right after they'd said "I do" was envy. He'd never thought much about it before, but now he did. He wanted what they had. Someday . As quickly as that realization struck him upside the head, it vanished with the knowledge that day would never come.

The reception hall inside The View, a primo event location nestled on a Lakewood hillside facing Denver, was packed with over two hundred guests. Large crystal chandeliers hung from the ceiling. White linens covered the round tables, with flowers and candles for centerpieces. Knowing Tori's efficiency and attention to detail, the pink napkins matching the color of her bridesmaids' dresses was no accident.

A live band did an admirable version of Ed Sheeran's "Perfect," the second slow dance he'd made it through with the bridesmaid he'd been paired with for the wedding—Amy. She was nice enough, but he couldn't take his eyes off Marlie.

The guy she was dancing with was, in his opinion, too goddamn good-looking and had his hand way too fucking far down her bare back. He gnashed his teeth. He didn't know whether to thank Tori for loaning Marlie that dress or burn it in the fireplace the second they got home. Light from the chandeliers reflected off the purple gemstone pendant around her neck, shimmering like a beacon.

The sleeves, if one could call them that, slung low on her upper arms, leaving her shoulders completely bare. The neckline was nonexistent, swooping down and barely covering her breasts. And the back, for shit's sake, exposed acres of smooth skin all the way to her waist. Exactly where that big gorilla had his beefy hand.

Ape-man twirled Marlie close enough for him to breathe in her rose scent. "Will you excuse me?" he said to Amy. "I promised a dance to my friend before we sit down for the rest of the speeches."

"Of course." She patted his chest, dipping her head and doing her best to look up at him with a seriously come-hither look. "But as soon as the speeches are over, you're mine again."

Ookay , as Noah would have said. He disengaged himself from her lingering hand and serpentined through the other dancing couples, confirming Noah was still huddled at a corner table with three other boys about his age. When he caught up to Marlie, he clamped a hand on ape-man's shoulder. "Mind if I cut in?"

"Well, actually—"

Evan insinuated himself between them, cutting the guy off as he twirled Marlie away. Over his shoulder, he caught the look of annoyance on the other man's face and chuckled.

"That wasn't very nice." The corners of Marlie's lips lifted.

He grinned. "I know." And he didn't give a shit. He tucked her against him, nuzzling her ear and inhaling more of her scent deeper into his lungs.

Her tiny hand felt so delicate in his, the bare skin at her lower back warm and smooth. He couldn't resist a quick glance at where her breasts mounded against his chest. Purple gemstones also dangled from her kissable earlobes. He shouldn't be thinking of her in these terms, but it was impossible not to. Didn't matter if she'd been wearing green scrubs. She had a light burning deep inside her that had once been extinguished yet now flared brightly again. No matter what she wore or how she looked on the outside, he would always be drawn to her inner beauty.

"You're incorrigible." She gave him a cute little smile that made him want to suck her lower lip into his mouth and taste every inch of her. "And you look very handsome."

He puffed up his chest. "Didn't think you noticed."

"Oh, please." She swatted his shoulder. " Every woman in here noticed, especially that woman you were dancing with."

"Jealous?" He didn't have the right, but he wanted her to be.

"Of course not. It was merely an observation."

Her thigh brushed against his, sending curly tendrils of awareness straight to his dick.

She looked at the corner table where Noah and the other boys had their heads in Noah's tablet and laughed. "He was so proud to wear a suit and tie."

"You've done wonders with him." He twirled them to the edge of the dance floor, where he could keep a closer eye on Noah. "Any word from his teachers on how he's doing?"

Two days ago, Noah's first day at school, Evan had explained the situation and discussed security issues with the principal and the school's security director. They assured him security was tight, with all exterior doors locked from the inside. The chances of someone getting to Noah were slim, but Evan had requested extra vigilance until Manello and the dirtbag lowlifes he worked for were arrested. Since then, he'd gone to the office during the day, and Marlie had returned to her custodian job, taking day shifts at the hospital.

"They tell me he's doing marvelously." She smiled, the way any proud parent did when they spoke of their children. When she looked up at him, her eyes sparkled with life.

Part of him wished he was responsible for at least some of that spark, but he knew better. That was all Noah's doing. Marlie had needed to be a mother again.

"They say he's super smart," she continued, "and he's managing a B in most of his classes. Anything involving a computer…he's an A+ student."

He arched a brow. "No surprise there."

Brett caught his eye, hitching his head to the wedding table, where the meals were being served. Sorry , Brett mouthed.

"Duty calls," he whispered in Marlie's ear, seriously disappointed at having to cut their dance short. He wasn't much of a dancer but with her in his arms, he could dance all night.

He escorted her to her seat, happy to see Noah had returned to sit next to her. Evan had been about to push in her chair, when ape-man materialized out of nowhere and did the honors.

Ape-man smirked. "Don't you have a speech to give?"

Smirking back, Evan leaned down to drop a lingering kiss smack-dab on Marlie's lips. He could swear the other man growled.

While the meal was served, the fathers of the bride and groom gave their speeches. After the meal was finished, more champagne flowed. Evan stood and tapped a knife on the side of his glass. When the room quieted, he picked up the microphone. "Deck, you're one of my very best friends. To say you and Tori met and fell in love under stressful circumstances is a major understatement. Having been there, watching it all unfold, I know for a fact it was downright…explosive."

Deck, Tori, Brett, and some of the audience burst into laughter. In reality, though, nothing about that part of their relationship had been funny. There'd been actual explosives involved, and Deck and Tori had nearly died.

Tori and Deck linked hands, gazing into each other's eyes. Their love was so screamingly obvious there might as well have been a beam of light shining down, surrounding them in a golden halo.

"Despite all the obstacles," he continued, "you found what the rest of us can only wish for. A friend. A partner. A love to last through time." Without intending to, he looked directly at Marlie.

The rest of the words he'd rehearsed choked in his throat and not just out of happiness for his friends. For an instant, he'd seen a future—with Marlie in it. Then it was gone, replaced by rotating images of his sister, his grieving parents, and all the other missing children on the board in the war room.

While guests clinked their own glasses, encouraging Deck and Tori to kiss, he forced himself to acknowledge the truth. His heart was not only fractured in different directions, he could actually feel it splitting down the center.

Like that gerbil on the wheel, going around and around for the rest of its life, the anxious beast inside him could never stop moving. Even after taking down the camp, and take it down he would, there would always be another case and more missing kids to find. If Gracie wasn't there, he'd keep searching for her.

He'd never stop wanting to be with Marlie again, but he couldn't lead her on, either. He cleared his throat, raising his glass high. "To Deck and Tori."

Shouts of "hear, hear" went around the room, followed by thunderous applause.

Deck bear-hugged Evan, then topped off Tori's glass from a bottle someone had left on the table by her plate. Oddly, Deck refilled his own glass from a different bottle. "Dad," he said, addressing Tori's father, "as you know, Tori and I have been engaged for over ten months, so you shouldn't have any lingering concerns about my intentions toward your daughter. Suffice to say, this is not a shotgun wedding, but…"

The other bottle. Tori wasn't drinking champagne. It's sparkling cider .

"We're pregnant!" Deck held his glass higher, grinning from ear to ear.

As the room erupted in even louder clapping, Marlie's face went ashen, and she rolled her lips inward. Noah grabbed her arm, giving her a gentle shake. Even he knew something was wrong. She leaned over and whispered something to Noah, then rushed for the door.

"Congratulations," he said to Tori, clapping Deck on the back. Then he raced to catch up with Marlie.

He never should have taken her to the wedding. He'd needed to keep Noah safe, and with him, Brett, and Deck all here, it had seemed like a good idea at the time. Now he knew it had been a bad idea, a selfish one that had hit the fan in spectacular fashion.

…

The wonderful meal she'd just eaten soured in Marlie's stomach. Her high heels clip-clopped on the gleaming marble floor as she searched for the nearest ladies room, in case she lost her lunch.

So much for progress.

Knowing Brett and Gemma were engaged had chipped away at some of her resolution. When they'd first arrived at the church, she'd again faltered, ready to run back to Evan's house with her tail between her legs. Until he'd taken her hand and led her and Noah to seats at the front of the church normally reserved for family. That small touch had given her the courage to make it through the ceremony. Until the moment Deck had announced Tori was pregnant. All her hard-fought courage fled before her neurons could fire twice, and she'd nearly lost it right there in front of over two hundred people.

Through watery eyes, she'd caught the look of shock on Evan's face. He hadn't known about Deck's announcement. She truly was happy for Tori and Deck, for all of Evan's friends, but that didn't stop her from wishing she were somewhere else. Anywhere else but here.

"Marlie!" A strong hand stopped her. Evan pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly. He stroked her hair, kissed the top of her head. "I'm sorry. I didn't know. I only just found out the same way you and everyone else did. I know this is hard on you."

A sob rose in the back of her throat, but she swallowed it down. "I feel so stupid, and so selfish," she choked out. "I'm happy for them, I truly am. It's just that…"

"Shh, I know." He stroked the back of her head. "It hurts to be reminded of those we've lost. But you've got this. I promise. You've got this, and I've got you." He pulled back enough to tip up her chin with his forefinger. "You've come a long way. Your journey isn't over. Don't let this stop you."

With a sigh, she nodded. Deep down, somewhere between the pain and anguish of what she'd lost and could never get back, she now knew she'd survive. Maybe even rise a step or two above the survival rung.

Noah ran down the hallway. "Are you okay?" Unexpectedly, he took her hand.

"I'm fine." Or I will be .

Evan threaded his fingers with hers. She looked at their joined hands—Noah's and Evan's, and in a bright flash of clarity, saw what she wanted. Noah might go for it. Evan was a big fat question mark.

All her training and experience told her they were approaching a crossroad. The direction she'd take was becoming more apparent every day. Which way Evan would go was anyone's guess. Just because she was living under his roof and they'd made love didn't mean he was now or would ever be ready for the kind of life she wanted.

For the first time in years, she knew what that was. What she needed from herself, and from Noah and Evan. When the time was right, she'd tell them both.