EPISODE ONE HUNDRED AND FOUR IT COULD HAVE BEEN WORSE

EPISODE ONE HUNDRED AND FOUR

IT COULD HAVE BEEN WORSE

P inpricks needled down her body as Daisy forced herself to turn and meet Miles s eyes. She felt swamped by guilt and horror. I m so sorry! she all but wailed. I had no idea that Regina would follow me to your house.

Miles s cheekbones were drawn tight, his eyes dark as pitch. That woman is a harpy.

Daisy felt a tear slide down her cheek. I ve ruined you, she whispered. Forced you to marry me in order to protect me, when Belle isn t yours. I ve ruined you.

I do not consider myself ruined, Miles said, though I ll admit that my future just took a sharp right turn. Damn it, Daisy, what in the hell are you doing, bringing your child here? No, forget that, he muttered. Too late.

I wasn t thinking clearly! Daisy cried. It was It was an impulse. A foolish impulse.

I have one question: Who is the father? I m going to give myself the pleasure of slaying him on the way to Doctors Commons to acquire a special license.

Daisy took one look at his murderous expression and knew that her father s life was in her hands.

I can t tell you that, she gulped.

You must tell me, Miles snarled. I m raising this man s bastard, and I m giving the lass a handsome dowry. I deserve that information.

No! Daisy cried. She dashed away another tear.

He took a step closer, his expression forbidding. Do you know what makes a marriage successful?

Daisy shook her head. Clearly, her parents had not provided a role model.

Honesty between husband and wife. Honesty and loyalty. Not loyalty to previous lovers.

I am not loyal to him, Daisy promised with a fervency in her voice that she hoped sounded convincing. Please, could we start over?

Start over from the moment when you strolled into my house, basket in hand? I wish that was possible. Where is your father in all this, by the way? I presume Lord Wharton knows of that child?

He doesn t, Daisy said, pretty sure that was true. He has no idea. He doesn t live with us.

I ve heard as much.

My father lives in a bachelor apartment in the Albany. Another tear slid down her cheek. In a lifetime of impulsive misdeeds, walking to Miles s house had to be her worst-and that included sneaking into Rothingale s masquerade. She had practically invited Lady Regina to conclude that Miles was a dastardly rake who would seduce a young lady.

Given the knowledge I ve gained in the House of Lords, I might as well accept that every young lady on the marriage market has entertained several lovers before she appears at her debut ball, swathed in virginal white, some months later trotting up the altar trailing a veil, Miles said grimly.

I m sure that s not the case, Daisy said uncertainly.

Miles shook his head. Misery and exhaustion were etched on his future wife s face, yet her cheeks held a rosy flush, and her gaze was pure and clear beneath welling tears. How could she look so innocent?

Yes, she was impulsive in visiting him. But she came to ask him for help.

He had to admit that he liked that.

The idea of Daisy wandering the city with a baby in a basket was abhorrent. In fact, when he next saw Lady Wharton-presumably at the wedding-he would say as much. What was she thinking, throwing her daughter into the street?

He d never liked the woman, but he had respected her moral sense. When she attacked his reputation, he had accepted the judgment as deserving. But now, he decided broodingly, Lady Wharton was very, very lucky that he was marrying her daughter, because otherwise he would have told all of London just what a hypocrite she was.

I m so sorry, Daisy rasped. I know you don t want to marry me.

It could be worse, he replied. I could have been forced to marry Lady Regina. She would likely cause a fuss at being immured in the country.

What?

You and Belle will have to stay in the country for a few months until we can announce the demise of family. I don t think that either of us are good enough actors to carry off true love on close examination, do you?

Daisy s eyes filled with tears again.

Miles felt a bolt of guilt. Damn it, he felt as if he were bullying her. He had an irrational urge to take his fianc e into his arms and comfort her.

He d never been fool enough to imagine his marriage as a great love affair. At least he knew that his future wife was fertile. Was that too cynical?

I should return home and speak to my mother, Daisy said. Her silvery hair had fallen from its pins and was spilling down over her shoulders. Her snub nose was red.

The urge to comfort her turned to an ache, so he drew Daisy across the room and sat down, pulling her onto his lap. It felt absurdly right when she curled against his shoulder.

Don t worry, Miles said, aware that Daisy was having the precise effect on him offered by so-called aphrodisiacs. Her hair smelled like apple blossoms and sunshine. He d always scoffed at the idea that a medical drug could invigorate a man s desire but if you bottled that perfume?

He wound his arms around her, aware that his tool was thickening under her arse. No need to worry about whether he would shock her. No wonder she had leaned back against him at the ball; she knew how a woman pleasures a man. Remembering that moment sent more sensual hunger surging through his body.

Sorry, he muttered.

What are you apologizing for? I m the one Daisy s chin quivered as she looked up at him. I m the one who came to you as if I were a homing pigeon. Except I was a pigeon bringing the plague because now you have to marry me, and you don t want to, and you ll have to dowry Belle, and-

You did not bring the plague, Miles interrupted, registering that his voice had dropped into a husky tone that he only used in the bedroom.

You re angry. Justly angry, she gulped. More tears slide down her cheeks.

He tightened his embrace. I was angry, but now I m getting used to the idea. After all, I had already decided to take a wife. Why not you? You get along with Clementine. I m sure my other sisters will love you.

She huddled a little closer, only one wet cheek visible.

You ll do.

It occurred to him that You ll do wasn t exactly romantic.

You re beautiful. And experienced, he added with sudden energy. Why would a man want to bed a lady who knows nothing in bed? It must be tedious. Boring. Painful for her, I understand. Was it painful for you?

Was what painful for me? Daisy asked, wiping away more tears.

She probably thought he was talking about giving birth. His mind instinctively veered away from the fact that she had given birth to another man s child.

Miles handed her his handkerchief. Nothing important. My point was that I do well to marry you. Satisfaction spread through him, the kind of feeling a man has after he endows an orphanage. He was doing the right thing, the kindly thing. It will save your reputation and allow Belle to be introduced to society.

He kissed the top of her silky head. We will have an excellent marriage. The words rumbled in his chest like a promise.

Perhaps, Daisy said, shaking out his handkerchief. She didn t sound as convinced as he was. Didn t you hope to fall in love before you agreed to marry?

No, Miles said without hesitation. I ve never been in love. It looks like a very uncomfortable state, not to mention temporary.

Daisy sighed. I think you know this already, but I might as well admit that I m in love with you.

At first Miles thought he hadn t heard her correctly. But as the words sunk in, he realized that if she was in love with him , she couldn t be in love with the baby s father.

That was excellent.

He cleared his throat, trying to think how to respond. I m honored by your affection, he said, knowing he sounded like an awkward ass.

Daisy pushed a cloud of hair away from her eyes. Don t worry. I understand that you don t feel the same. It s been terribly uncomfortable, so hopefully it is temporary. Ever since the evening when my gown fell to the floor, I can t stop looking for you everywhere. She blew her nose and then added, It s been so humiliating. At least when we re married, I ll know where you are.

She gave him a watery smile. I m sure I ll quickly grow tired of having you around.

Miles generally looked for her as well, but only because Daisy was so much more interesting than the other young women he was courting. Not that he had been courting her. But he had kept an eye on her, just in case she experienced another problem with her clothing.

In fact, once we re married, I expect the feeling will quickly wane, she continued, sounding slightly more cheerful. I don t know any married couples who voluntarily spend time together, other than my cousin Livie and her husband.

My best friend Jonah and his wife Bea, Miles put in. He scarcely comes to London now that they have a son, William.

Will you mind living in the country?

I ll return to the city after a week. I have a number of cases coming up to trial in the House of Lords.

You can t, Daisy said, straightening. We are supposed to be desperately in love, remember? Major FitzRoy took Livie with him to war . A besotted man wouldn t leave his bride after a mere week.

Her bottom was maddeningly lush, so Miles was having trouble keeping his mind on the conversation. Besotted, he repeated.

That means people have to believe that you are in love with me, just as I am with you.

A week isn t good enough? Miles shifted his legs, thinking of how much he wanted to carry her upstairs to his bedchamber. In fact, now he thought of it, seven days may not be long enough to sate himself. I could stay longer on the estate, he offered. I could

He could tell Lord Paget that he didn t want to investigate any more crimes. The idea felt like a glass of cold water on a blisteringly hot day.

I could stay at least a month, he decided.

Excellent, Daisy said, huddling back against his chest.

He was starting to feel quite content. Really, this was an excellent solution. Marrying Daisy meant having her in his bed, night after night.

Every night.

What s more, he liked Belle. She was a cheerful scrap of humanity, and he would be happy to father her.

He brushed the hair back from Daisy s cheek. Feeling better?

More or less.

We share something far more important than temporary infatuation, he said, making no attempt to hide the heat in his gaze.

She glanced up at him. Oh? Her eyelids flickered, and the corner of her lush mouth curled up.

Taking that as an invitation, Miles bent his head and licked into her mouth, her taste instantly igniting his body. He arrowed his fingers into her silky, messy curls so he could kiss her more deeply.

Daisy curled an arm around his neck, kissing him back. He could feel her nipples through her light gown, through his linen shirt, as her breasts pressed against his chest. A deep groan caught in his throat.

Do I feel dazed because I m in love with you, or because you kiss so much better than my other suitors? she whispered after he pulled away just enough to breathe.

He registered the fact that Belle s father was apparently as unskilled in bed as he was worthless, but pushed the thought away. We should stop, he managed sometime later, fighting the fact that his blood was on fire.

Daisy s eyes were still swollen, but she looked far happier. I have one requirement for our marriage. I didn t think of it until now, but it s important.

Miles had the sudden realization that he didn t want her to fall out of love with him. He wanted her to be happy. Yes?

No more Rothingale. No mistresses. No affairs with Russian dancers.

He traced her generous lower lip with one finger. Are you saying that you and I will cleave unto each other-to use the Biblical phrase-til death do us part?

Daisy took a deep breath. Yes.

No more kissing other men. The words jumped from his mouth without conscious volition. Your very last impulsive act, as far as the male sex is concerned, was walking to my house.

Her lips curved. I promise. No kissing anyone except my husband. The same for you.

Fidelity was obviously a worthy goal.

More to the point, Miles hadn t desired anyone since He realized with a shock that he hadn t looked at a woman lustfully since the Rothingale masquerade. Not that it had anything to do with Daisy.

I haven t had a mistress or a lover in some years, he told her. I have a feeling that you, Lady Devin, will keep me busy.

Her laugh was not bawdy , precisely. It was joyful. The fact that his blood raced with pure lust at the sound?

Inexplicable.