19. Winter

I went homeafter the game and sat biting my nails for a good half an hour. I bounced between elation at Asher calling himself my boyfriend, and worry that he'd gotten in a terrible fight with Trent.

I took a long shower, still cold from the rink. Even worse, I felt dirty somehow, like that small interaction with Trent had tainted me. Just his eyes moving over me felt like they left filth behind. I washed my hair a few times and made the shower super-hot, standing under the spray until every last trace of revulsion was chased away.

Back in my room, I closed the window and curtains tightly and dried my hair. Selena had disappeared after the game and hadn't been answering her phone.

I locked the door to my room, paranoid about sleeping alone, and got into bed. I was channeling my inner granny, passing on the after-party, putting on my blue-light glasses, and getting ready for bed all before midnight. No one could accuse me of not living it up in college.

I scrolled on my phone. Eve had posted about the Hellions game. I went through her photos. There were plenty of Beckett, of course, and one of Asher, sitting in the penalty box. My heartbeat thudded loudly in my ears.

My finger hovered over the Hellions' official page for a second, then I clicked on it. Professional images of the game popped up. Asher was all over it. I mean, I got it. If I were responsible for the PR of a hockey team and they had a player who looked like Asher, I'd plaster his beautiful face all over the team socials, too. It was brilliant marketing.

He'd scored twice tonight, and the Hellions had won. He was probably out partying with the team now. Marcus always seemed to drag his friends into temptation. Unless he'd been arrested for fighting with Trent, that was.

Who was he with? What were they doing?

I swallowed those uncomfortable questions, stuffing them down deep inside where I couldn't think about them anymore.

Instead, I browsed the photos of Asher. Crap, he was hot. If he was at an after-party, he was probably swarmed with interested girls. Of course he was. It was human nature. He was hot, talented, strong, and smooth as silk when he wanted to be. He was cheeky and dangerous, somehow both at the same time. He was also protective as hell and could be a gentleman when you least expected it.

Just thinking about him and staring at the pictures got me all squirmy. My nipples had hardened at just the thought of him. I couldn't get a crush on my fake boyfriend. That couldn't happen. If that happened, I'd be finished. I'd die of humiliation if he knew I was lying here in bed thinking about him.

But…Asher wasn't here. He didn't know.

I set down my phone and reached into my nightstand. My new bed had been delivered a few days ago, so I was comfortable again in my room. Replacing my bed had been a top priority, but there was one other thing I'd had to replace that Asher had messed with.

My vibrator.

While surfing the site, something fun and new had caught my eye: clit-eating panties. (Seriously, what would they think of next?) Selena wasn't here, and I was turned on from looking at photos of a sweaty and bloodstained Asher in action. It was the perfect time to try them out.

Five minutes later, I had them on and a remote clutched in my hand. I put it on the lowest setting, and and a powerful vibration shot through me. Oh my. That was strong. I'd only put the vibration to level three, and the level went all the way up to ten.

It didn't take me long to come. I lay back, letting the clever massage and suction function of the mesh panties do their job, and picked up my phone again. I didn't read any of my usual spicy book scenes to get myself off. I looked at Asher's game photos. This was bad. This was embarrassing, but, I rationalized, no one needed to know.

I came hard. Not hard like I had when he'd had his hand buried between my legs, but harder than I usually would alone. It was the photos and the thought of him. I shouldn't let myself feel anything for my hockey bully turned fake boyfriend, but I couldn't deny that it might already be too late.

I fell asleep somewhere between coming and fumbling to turn off the panties, losing the remote in the covers in the process.

I woke with a start, having no idea what had roused me from sleep until I heard it. The soft, persistent rhythm of someone walking over squeaking floorboards, right beside my bed. Fear shot through me, visceral and crippling. I kept my eyes closed, scared to open them and see anyone other than Selena. Had she come back? No, I didn't think so. She wasn't capable of being so stealthy.

Leather creaked, and the footsteps moved away from the bed. A huge dark shape became visible, outlined against the window. The person was tall and broad, and there was something immediately familiar about his powerful grace as he sank into the chair beside my bed.

Asher.

A knot formed in my throat, and I found it hard to breathe. He sat completely still, and I couldn't make out anything but the line of his shoulders, his head tilted toward me. It was dark, too dark for him to see me, I thought, but maybe I was wrong.

After a moment, he shifted forward, and I slammed my eyes closed. My heart was pounding so hard he could probably hear it. My breath was difficult to hold on to; it kept running away. I felt excited, like I'd been running or in a chase.

Asher reached out a long arm and carefully pushed my hair back from my face. His fingertips brushed my cheek, setting my skin on fire.

What was he staring at? He shifted forward again and stood. Every nerve in my body felt like it was focused on him and his movements. It was quiet. I didn't dare open my eyes to see where he was.

Then his fingers touched my leg. They trailed up my shin and over my knee, leaving shivers behind.

He reached my thigh and paused. "Red light or green light, Ice Queen?"

I nearly jumped at his voice. Did he know I was awake?

He chuckled. "I hate to break it to you, but you're not a great actress."

Crap. He knew. His hand drifted back down my leg. No. Don't go! But he wasn't finished. Instead, he gripped my ankle and tickled my damn foot. I shot up and yelped. I had crazy ticklish feet.

He laughed as I tried to kick him.

"Hey! Get off," I pleaded, writhing around on the bed, trying desperately to get the maddening touch to stop.

"Say please."

"Please, please stop. I'm begging you," I laughed.

Asher sank onto the bed beside my feet. "Who knew that all I needed to do was tickle you to make you more pliable."

"I hate you." I shuddered and turned on my front, sinking my hot face into my pillow. Tickling was the worst.

"No, you don't." Asher patted my ass. I stiffened up.

"How did you get in here? I locked the door."

"I made a copy of your key, of course. You're in bed early for a game night," he said.

"Well, so are you," I countered, unsure how to reply to the key comment. What could I say?

"I'm not in bed," he pointed out.

"You're in my bed," I snapped back.

He just nodded. "That's right, I am. What's this?" He held something up.

I just shrugged, but then I heard a clicking noise. A second later, a strong vibration thrummed through my panties. They weren't nearly as silent as advertised.

"What the fuck is that?" Asher wondered and leaned toward the sound.

"Nothing, I mean — I don't know. I think it's coming from outside," I babbled, sitting up and arranging the covers over my lower half. Maybe if I was noisy enough, he wouldn't be able to tell it was coming from my panties.

My hopes were immediately dashed when he fiddled with the remote, turning the vibration all the way up, and I screamed and fell sideways onto the mattress.

He ripped the covers back and stared. "Are those vibrating panties?"

"Yes, okay, yes! Turn it off, now!"

"Oh, I don't think I'm going to be doing that."

The intensity fell and became bearable again. I panted, turning over to lie on my back.

"So, let me get this straight…You come home after the hockey game, get into bed, and touch yourself? Had anyone in mind while you got off?"

Yes. You. God, I was so fucked in the head.

I ignored his words and folded my arms over my chest. "You've had your fun. Turn them off now or I'll take them off."

I touched the waistband of the panties, ready to try and wrestle them off.

Asher tutted. "Try it, and I'll tie you to this bed for days and leave this on every time I go. You can shout for help…see how many times you can come while Selena or the den mother cuts you free.

I opened my mouth to unleash vitriol on him, but a moan slipped out instead. After fantasizing about him earlier, the fact that he was sitting there watching me get off was going to make me come extra fast. The humiliation had no bounds.

"So, this is one of those expensive vibrators that's worth more than me? I really can't wait to see how it works." He moved back to the armchair by the bed and sat back. All he needed was popcorn now, and he'd be at the movies, for all his lazy lounging.

I sat up as well as I could, crossed my arms, and raised my chin at him. I could do this. I wasn't a slave to his whims. I could hide my reaction. "Not in a million years am I going to get off in front of you." My voice sounded a lot more confident than I felt.

"I think that ship has sailed. Stop being a fucking brat and do what you're told for once."

"Never!" The word had barely left me when he dialed up the vibration again. I fell back, my mouth dropping open. It was too much. He'd taken me right to the edge, where it didn't hurt, not quite yet, but I couldn't think about anything else. It was impossible.

My hips undulated of their own accord.

"There's no shame in letting your boyfriend see you come, baby…it's not even the first time."

His voice was really doing it for me. I managed a smirk.

"So, you admit that I won…" I broke off in a gasp as he turned up the intensity again.

"Who was that guy to you? Don't lie," he said in a tight tone.

Trent entered my head and immediately the pleasure filling my body soured. "No one."

"He's under the impression that you're a thing. The word marriage was used," Asher said.

I snorted in disbelief. "He's delusional. If you want to talk about him, turn it off. I don't want to think about him right now," I panted.

Asher nodded approvingly. "You're right. You should only be thinking about me, watching you come."

Heat crept back over me at his tone. He sounded more intense than ever. Possessive. Hungry. I gasped, rocking against the mattress.

"Now, that's a good girl. Let it happen, Your Majesty…and let me see how it feels." He leaned forward, bracing his elbows on his knees, grasping the fucking remote in one hand.

I gripped the covers by the fistful, my fight to ignore the feeling impossible now that he'd turned up the intensity. I flopped back, my body moving without my control. I was writhing like a possessed woman, and he was staring.

The light snapped on, and I caught sight of Asher's infuriating smirk. "That's better. Let me see the show."

My gaze stuck to his face, my eyes bound to his. I couldn't look away. I'd lost control of my body.

"So, a remote? Are rich people too lazy to use their own hands to get off, or is this designed for couples?" he teased, his eyes glued to my every movement.

I flushed, biting my lip to keep in a groan. "If you must know, I like to keep my hands free for reading."

"Reading," he repeated skeptically.

I somehow managed an eye roll, despite the pleasure charging through my body. "Yes, reading. Not that you'd know anything about it, but titillating women is a little more intellectually demanding than it is for men…"

"Are you telling me you read porn and wear these panties? Where the fuck is this library? Your taste in books sounds right up my alley."

"It's not porn, it's romance…that's what turns women on," I gasped out. "Not that you'd know much about either of those things."

"I don't know, I think I've done a decent job of the latter the last few times we've tussled." He stood up and shed his jacket, quickly followed by his T-shirt. His bare chest gleamed golden in the lamp light. His tattoos crawled up his muscular arms to his huge shoulders. Now I was the one who couldn't look away. His hands went to his belt.

"What are you doing?" I whispered, climbing higher and higher with every second.

"Getting ready to fuck my girlfriend, why?" He bent at the waist and pushed his jeans down, taking his boxers with them.

"Fuck me?" I echoed, dazed and so close to coming, a stiff breeze across my nipples could have set me off.

He smirked and nodded. "I'm going to baby, no need to beg."

I rolled my eyes, or started to, but the pleasure was climbing to a peak I couldn't avoid. The bed dipped and Asher was there, reaching across me to my nightstand.

"You got protection in here?"

I swallowed hard and shook my head, panting now with the effort of holding back a devastating orgasm. The knowledge that I was about to have sex for the very first time had distracted me. Did I even want to? Yes. Fucking yes, I did. I didn't even have to search for the answer. It was right there.

"I'm on the pill," I murmured, crying out as the relentless vibration threatened to push me over the edge.

Asher stilled, studying me with an unreadable look in his eyes. "You're asking me to be bare inside you, Ice Queen?" he murmured, reaching out and tracing my lips with a finger. "I don't do that."

"Well, don't you carry protection? I'm sure you've got enough action going on to justify it," I muttered, my entire body clenching and unclenching, so close I could taste it.

"I don't, actually. I don't have time to fuck around with girls who barely interest me, and since Parents' Day last year, there's only been one I've wanted to make scream." He leaned down, framing my face with both hands, pinning me to the bed. The panties were still working their magic, and now, his face was right in front of me. His hips were pressing the damn vibration even harder against me as I struggled to take in what he was saying. He pushed his fingers into my hair.

"That's you, Winter. I've not fucked a girl since you sauntered into my life and buried yourself in my head." His fingers gripped my skull, pressing in like he could push me out of his thoughts by sheer will alone. Then he kissed me, and I lost the battle.

I came so hard I cried out, a strangled mewl, right into his mouth. I felt his lips curve as he smiled mid-kiss. Then his tongue was raking against mine, thrusting into my mouth as I came and came, waves of pleasure coasting through me, wrecking me on rocks and leaving me scattered.

I'd barely finished when his hands were tugging the panties down. I was so wet, I was dripping down my legs. My clit was twitching like mad when he slid his fingers over it. I seized up, unable to stand the sensation. His fingers trailed down and found my entrance, pressing inside.

"Yes, oh god, yes," I panted. The orgasm was still so close, and suddenly being filled where it had been so empty before felt beyond amazing.

"I know what you need, Your Majesty," he murmured, pulling his fingers free and replacing them with his rounded tip, pressing just inside. "Let me give you what you need."

Then he was pressing in, stretching me like nothing ever had before. He was long and thick, and my muscles fought him. But it felt so good and I was so ready, that before I knew it, he was seated deep inside.

"Fuck, you feel amazing bare," he grunted, pausing for a moment to let me adjust.

"That's because you've never done it before," I mused, shocked at that fact. Asher always fucked with condoms? According to Selena, most guys didn't like them. Even more shocking, he hadn't fucked anyone since that Parents' Day? That was over a year ago. I didn't know what to feel about that.

"From now on, this is the way we fuck. I can't go back, now that I've felt all of you," he muttered and started to move. A million women's magazines, TV shows, and movies had prepared me to think that this was really going to hurt. Honestly, there was pain, the new and unfamiliar feeling of untested muscles. But there was also pleasure, and that overwhelmed me with every second that he thrust steadily into me. Before I knew it, my earlier orgasm was rushing back, but this time it promised to be something else entirely.

Asher was hot, his neck beaded with sweat, his strong, lithe body never still, driving me insane. I clung onto him as he rocked inside me, resting his forehead against mine.

"Fucking hell," he swore. "You were made for this, Your Majesty," he growled.

"Having sex?" I squeaked. I didn't know whether it was a compliment or an insult.

"Being fucked — by me," he said in a tight voice.