19. Mira

nineteen

Mira

That morning, I dream of Sunder, bubbling Chroma dances at the edge of my vision, just out of reach. It makes my head swim every time I turn my head. Yet this is not the typical cabin where we met in Dreamshares before. It's a dark room at the back of a vaguely familiar inn.

After our…

I hesitate to call it a lesson because Tairyn didn't teach me anything. After our… chat?

He placed the shield around me again, dampening my access to Chroma completely. Losing the feeling of Sunder and Bobble felt like a huge blow. But if I'm really in a Dreamshare with them…

Then I see him.

Flecks of rainbow Chroma fly around Sunder like he's stuck in a wind tunnel, and occasionally he reaches for one. He's wearing gloves that look like golden soccer goalie mitts. Every time he catches one of the flapping things, he looks at it. Emotions writhe across his face. Pain and discomfort are clear.

I move toward him, hand outstretched. Is this real? "Sunder?" I ask cautiously.

He watches the thing until it quiets, then once it does, he lets it go.

This is super weird.

"Mira?"

I know that voice.

I spin, throwing my arms out. Bobble lifts me up, holding me tight. I want to cry out as I hold on to him. I know it's him beyond any doubt. He smells like a comforting mixture of homey musk and clean linen, a scent that I would identify anywhere as belonging to my Bobble cat.

"Mira." He breathes my name like a prayer. I can hear the tears in his voice. "Are you okay? Where are you?"

Pulling back just enough to see his face, I nod. "I'm okay. I'm somewhere in the Western Slopes. It's like an entire palace built under a mountain. I don't remember getting here, though. I can't tell you how to get in exactly." I squeeze his arms lightly. "But I'm fine. The Fourth Shard is with me."

"What? Is he dangerous? Is he…"

"He's fine," I reassure Bobble. "He's a little odd if I'm being honest, but he's kind of… great."

I step back, dropping Bobble's hands. "You can't come here," I breathe. "I think he'd hurt you if you showed up."

"It's okay, Mira," Bobble soothes me. "We know the risks. Nothing is going to keep us from you."

"You need to leave me here. I have my own way out," I whisper.

"How?"

"We made a deal. I just have to bond him, but he's teaching me how to use my red Chroma. Trying to, at least." Bobble raises an eyebrow at me.

"And how is that going for you so far?"

"I'll get it done. You just be ready for me. Once he releases my shield again, I'll reach out to you."

"We're coming for you."

"Please be careful. You don't know Tairyn. The things he can do. He's very powerful, Bobs. He can channel white."

"We're coming for you," Bobble says again, his voice even more firm this time.

I give him a look of doubt but shift my focus to Sunder. "What's going on over there?"

"He hates it, but he's feeling his feelings," Bobble says with a proud purr. I smile at him, feeling the warmth in my chest blossom at that soothing sound I didn't realize I missed so deeply.

"Did you teach him to do that?"

"I did. We hope that he can use his ability to sense emotions to find you, or at least, to find the other Shards. Now I know you're really far west from here, but this might help us pinpoint the exact location."

He bounces on his toes with excitement, clearly relieved to have new information.

"I can't believe he listened to you."

"We've gotten closer recently."

Bobble's gaze flicks between me and Sunder. His eyes filled with unwavering adoration. I can see the longing in his face, the desire to be wanted, to be loved by us both. I've never seen him look at Sunder like that before though.

I give him a playful elbow in the side. "Oh yeah? How close?"

God, it feels good to smile. Bobble man rolls his eyes a little at my insinuation, but I don't miss the subtle blush blossom on his cheeks. My heart swells with excitement and butterflies. If they are growing feelings for each other…

An image flashes through my mind of the three of us, living happily together after all this. But it's short-lived. Where do the other shards fit into that picture? If not Tairyn, what of Callum? And what if they decide to merge into Dan'thiel? Then I'll have none of them.

"Are you mad?"

I shake my head emphatically, clearing the dark thoughts.

"Mad? Why would I be mad? I just want us all to be happy together. And if you two are happy together too, even better."

"Well, we're not together. I mean, nothing happened. I offered, but he…"

He shakes his head a little sadly. "I don't think he's interested in me that way, Mira. I'm sorry to get your hopes up."

I run a comforting hand down his arm. The sting of rejection is all too well known to me, but I have my doubts this will be the end of their story. I've seen the way Sunder looks at him, too. Maybe with less intensity, but it's a far cry from calling him a dirty rat bastard and kicking him away.

Taking a deep breath, I try to refocus.

"Okay. So. Sunder is feeling his feelings so that he can use his feelings to find Tairyn's feelings," I restate.

Bobble nods. "Even if the Second releases you," his tone makes it clear how likely he thinks that is. "We need to find you before they do."

As soon as he says it, Bobble's face gets pale.

I stare flatly at him. "Bobble."

"Mira." His eyes shift from side to side in discomfort.

"Who are they?"

He grimaces. "I guess that now would be a bad time to tell you the centaurs that attacked us when we first arrived in Illuemera… Well, they've got wanted posters everywhere."

I blink at him before responding numbly. "That's not the worst of it."

Quickly, I explain my conversation with Tairyn about Yurghen being alive. My mind swirls with images and questions.

"But how?" Bobble's voice is on the verge of panic. I simply shrug. I saw him die. One hundred percent. I saw him die. Didn't I?

Of course I did. Because I killed him. With my Chroma. In a Chroma-explosion that would have made the United States government envious. It had ripped into him, searing his flesh from his bones, and absolutely destroying him in every sense of the word.

I definitely killed Yurghen.

So how the hell is he alive?

He's going to come for me, I know it. For us.

"You have to get away from here, Bobble. You can't let him find you. Go back home. Take Sunder and go back home where it's safe. I'll find you."

Bobble wraps me in his comforting embrace, shushing me as his warmth seeps into my bones. Behind him, Sunder's face is glazed with determination as he reaches for another piece of colorful confetti.

I take a deep breath, calming myself a bit.

"Let's take it piece by piece."

"Okay," I say slowly. "We're fugitives with our pictures plastered everywhere. Yurghen is alive. Presumably he wants revenge for you know… killing him and thwarting his research efforts. And I'm stuck underground in some mountainside stone palace that's run by someone with a supervillain fetish."

"But you're okay, and that's something to be thankful for. And you've found the last Shard."

I try to lean into his embrace. Try to let his words resonate.

Because if I'm being honest with myself, I don't think everything is going to be okay.

In fact, I feel the exact opposite.

Behind us, Sunder's eyes pop open. "Here, this one seems wrong," he says, reaching for one confetto. I meet his eye, and I can see the warring impulses clear on his face. He wants to jump up and hug me, but he's determined to see this quest through.

His hand, wrapped in a golden glove of Bobble's Chroma, grabs one from midair and his face is instantly coated in a veneer of disgust. We race to his side, kneeling before him. I bite my lip, trying to hold back the flurry of questions bubbling on the tip of my tongue. Don't distract.

"It feels…. Wrong. Oily. It's him. I know-"

Sunder grunts with exertion, beads of sweat dripping down the side of his face. He releases a roar from his chest, the raw emotion sending me back with surprise. But while I'm repelled, Bobble is thrust forward, grabbing Sunder by the shoulders. "You can do it. Focus. Feel the feelings, First."

Sunder growls a slew of curses as I watch the tender concern on Bobble's face.

The piece of confetto slips through his fingers, flying up into the flurry, and my breath catches. Sunder pants. "So much guilt. Anger. Shame. I couldn't…hold on anymore. I'm sorry."

I grab him into my arms, and he slowly wraps around me. "It's ok. You did great."

"I could see through his eyes. That's never happened before. I knew it was him. It felt like him. Like us. And then I slipped in and out of his mind."

The dream wavers and darkness collapses around us. The last thing I hear is Sunder's growl. "We're coming for you, Mira."