Chapter 17

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Turmoil

I flop down on the worn couch, staring blankly at the faded posters adorning the dingy walls of my mobile home.

Through the thin metal frame, bass thrums like a heartbeat—the club's having another damn rager tonight.

The door bursts open and Spark saunters in, shades on even though the sun set hours ago. "Yo, you coming out or what? Place is lit, bro."

"Nah man, I'm good here," I mutter, waving him off.

Spark pushes his sunglasses up on his dark brown hair and fixes me with a stern look—or at least tries to.

Spark's not exactly an authoritative dude. "C'mon Turmoil, you've been holed up in here for days. It'll be good for you to get out, have some fun for a change."

I heave out a sigh.

He's not wrong.

Lately, I just haven't felt like...myself.

Like a puzzle piece that doesn't quite fit anymore.

But wallowing alone sure as shit ain't helping either.

"All right, all right," I relent, pushing to my feet. "I'll make an appearance. But I ain't staying long."

"That's my boy!" Spark claps me on the shoulder with a grin. "C'mon, let's get outta here."

As we step outside, the party roars to life around us.

Raucous laughter, clinking bottles, women's high-pitched giggles.

Spark beelines for the bar while I hang back, shoving my hands in my pockets.

Across the lot, beyond the mass of bikes gleaming under twinkling Christmas lights, I can just make out Zoe's little blue modular.

I know that's where Spark will end up tonight.

He always does lately.

Must be nice, having someone you wanna go home to at the end of the day.

I push down the sharp ache in my chest, that hollow longing for something I can't even name, and follow Spark to the bar.

Maybe he's right.

Maybe a cold drink and some halfway decent company is exactly what I need to shake off this funk.

Lord knows I could use a distraction from the restless thoughts churning in my head.

I grab the bottle Spark slides my way and take a swig.

Here goes nothing.

"Well look what the cat dragged in," Doc smirks as he walks up beside me, "Was starting to think you'd gone full hermit on us, brother."

I snort, taking another pull from my bottle. "Nah, just been busy. You know how it is."

"Oh I know. Heard that last run was a real shitshow." He arches a brow. "Spark finally drag your surly ass outta that tin can?"

"Somethin' like that." I tip my chin toward him. "Congrats, by the way. On the kid."

Doc's face splits in a proud grin. "Thanks, man. Still can't hardly believe it myself."

"You sure it's yours?" The question slips out before I can think better of it. "I mean, no offense, but Sassy ain't exactly known for keeping her legs crossed, if you know what I mean..."

Spark chokes on his beer, shooting me an incredulous look.

But Doc just chuckles, completely unfazed. "She may be a lot of things, but she ain't no liar. Besides, ain't no one else been sniffing around her in weeks. Morning sickness is a hell of a cock block."

I hum noncommittally.

Makes sense, I guess.

Sassy's mouth has gotten her on the wrong side of more than a few ol' ladies lately.

Probably smart to lay low.

"If she knew what was good for her, she'd learn to keep that trap shut and stay in her own damn lane," Spark grumbles. "Girl's always startin' shit."

"Ain't that the truth," Doc agrees, taking a swig. "But you know Sassy. Broad's got more balls than brains. Guess that mouth is gonna have to start getting her out of trouble, instead of into it."

We all share a laugh at that, the tension breaking.

Doc shakes his head, still grinning.

"Ah, she'll be all right. Hopefully this baby knocks some sense into her." He drains the rest of his bottle and pushes off the bar. "Imma see if she's got her ass out of bed yet. Catch you boys later."

"Later, man." I raise my bottle in salute as he weaves back into the crowd.

Alone again, Spark and I settle into companionable silence, surveying the party as we nurse our drinks.

Despite the good-natured ribbing and cold beer, I still can't quite shake the dark cloud dogging my heels.

I hate this listless in-between feeling, stuck in my own head with nowhere to aim this restless energy.

I need something to do, something to sink my teeth into, some way to get my edge back.

Anything to stop my mind from circling back to piercing gray eyes and pink parted lips.

Fuck.

I scrub a hand down my face.

Don't go there, asshole.

Suddenly the party feels too crowded, to overwhelming.

Draining my bottle, I push to my feet, slapping Spark on the shoulder. "I'm out, man. Catch you later."

"Wait, what? C'mon, you just got here!"

But I'm already cutting through the crowd, desperate for air untainted by exhaust and stale beer and too many bodies.

Cool night wind slaps my face as I walk into the parking lot, gasping lungfuls that do nothing to ease the pressure on my chest.

Jesus, get it together.

Gravel crunches under my boots as I stalk past rows of bikes, no particular destination in mind.

I just need to move, to outrun my own damn thoughts before they catch up and drag me under again.

A flash of movement at the gate catches my eye.

Shiver, in the guard shack.

He's leaning forward, squinting into the darkness beyond the chain link, shoulders tense.

"Yo, Shiver!" I call out as I draw closer. "What's up, man? We got trouble?"

But as I reach the gate, the words shrivel and die in my throat.

Because there, haloed in the glow of a solitary streetlamp, is the absolute last person I expected to see tonight.

Or ever again.

"Hello, Abe."

Seraphina.

My heart stutters, then kicks into overdrive.

I blink hard, half-convinced she's nothing more than a figment conjured by too many nights with too little sleep.

But no, she's still there, those storm-cloud eyes locked on mine, full lips curved in a smile that's equal parts wicked and uncertain.

"Seraphina," I rasp, tasting her name on my tongue like a long-forgotten prayer. "What the hell are you doing here?"

She cocks her head, honey-blonde hair spilling over one shoulder. "Can't a girl just drop by to say hello?"

Shiver's gaze darts between us, brow furrowed.

He clears his throat. "Uh, Turmoil? You know this chick?"

I barely spare him a glance. "Yeah. I know her."

Too well.

"Well, she's requesting to see you," Shiver says slowly, as if explaining something to a child.

"I see." I can't tear my eyes away from her, drinking in every detail like a man dying of thirst.

The way her leather jacket hugs her curves, the glint of silver at her ears, her throat.

The mask of red painted across her lips.

Seraphina arches one perfect brow. "You don't look particularly happy to see me, Abe. Should I be worried?"

A strangled laugh escapes me. "Worried? Why would you be worried, Sera? ‘Cause last time I checked, you're the one who wanted me gone."

I choke on the words.

She takes a step closer, pale fingers curling around the chain link. "I had my reasons for pushing you away. You of all people should understand that."

Should I?

The retort burns on my tongue, but I swallow it back.

We've got a bigger audience than I'd like for this little reunion.

"Shiver," I say, fighting to keep my voice level. "Open the gate."

He hesitates, doubt etched into the lines of his face. "I don't know, man. If she's gonna cause problems."

"She won't." I level him with a look that brooks no argument. "I'll handle it. Now open the damn gate."

With a muttered curse, he reaches for the button.

The gate rattles open and Seraphina glides through, lithe as a jungle cat.

This close, her scent wraps around me, jasmine and nightshade, and it takes every ounce of willpower not to reach for her.

She stops a hairsbreadth away, tipping her head back to meet my gaze.

A slow smile curves her lips. "Hello, lover. Miss me?"

I open my mouth—to say what, I haven't got a fucking clue—but she beats me to the punch.

"Careful," she purrs, eyes dancing with mirth. "Keep grinning at me like that, and I might start to think you're actually happy I'm here."

My own lips twitch. "Maybe I'm just smiling ‘cause you haven't hit me yet."

Off to the side, Shiver makes a strangled noise.

Seraphina's smile widens. "Mmm, never know, I might be getting ready to. Or I could have a gun tucked away," Her gaze drags deliberately down my body and back up again. "Care to frisk me and find out?"

I have to blink at that, slow and measured, heat curling low in my gut.

Christ, woman.

Playing with fire, as usual.

Aloud, I say, "Nah. If you were gonna shoot me, you'd have done it already. Subtlety never was your strong suit."

She laughs at that, bright and carefree, and the sound wraps around my heart and squeezes . "True enough. I always did prefer the direct approach."

I stuff my hands in my pockets, curling them into fists to keep from reaching for her. "So. You gonna tell me why you're here? The last time we saw each other things didn't exactly go well."

The playful glint fades from her eyes, replaced by something more solemn. "I didn't know about him," she says softly. "About my father. Who he really was. What he did."

I go still. "What do you mean?"

"He wasn't a good man, Abe. Far from it. A monster in his own right." She looks away, blinking rapidly. "My mum kept me in the dark. Fed me pretty lies my whole life. But I finally learned the truth."

Shit.

I want to pull her into my arms, offer comfort, but I force myself to stay put. "I'm sorry."

Seraphina shakes her head. "Don't be. It's not your fault. It's just... this desperate quest for revenge, it doesn't make sense anymore. How can I avenge a man like that? A man I never truly knew?"

My heart clenches painfully in my chest.

I hate seeing her like this, lost and hurting.

I want to fix it, make it all better, but I know I can't.

This is something she has to come to terms with on her own.

"Hey," I say gruffly, ducking my head to catch her gaze. "For what it's worth... I'm glad you're here."

A ghost of a smile touches her lips. "Are you?"

"Yeah." I risk settling a hand on her hip, feeling the warmth of her through the thin fabric of her dress. "I am."

Seraphina goes still, barely seeming to breathe. "Abe."

There's a warning in her tone, a question.

I answer it by tugging her closer, until her body is flush against mine, until I can feel every dip and curve through our clothes.

My other hand comes up to frame her face, thumb brushing over the apple of her cheek.

"I'm not expecting anything," I murmur, holding her gaze steadily. "I just...I'm here, all right? Whatever you need. I'm right here."

Something shifts in her expression, gratitude and affection and a hint of something deeper, something that makes my pulse kick.

She lifts onto her toes, hands braced on my chest, and brushes a soft kiss to the corner of my mouth.

"Thank you," she whispers against my skin. "For being you."

"I'm not even gonna lie, Sera. I'm fuckin' confused as shit right now. Why… I mean, are we good?" I prompt, trying to keep my voice steady even as my heart pounds wildly in my chest.

Seraphina looks up at me, slate gray eyes luminous in the glow of the lights.

She takes a step closer, until barely a breath separates us. "You told me it was real for you, and I hope it was, because I love you. I don't know when it happened, but there's no denying it."

The words hang in the air between us.

For a moment, I can't breathe, can't think.

All I can do is stare at her, drinking in the sight of this incredible woman who's somehow seen past all my bullshit to the man underneath.

The man I want to be, for her.

I reach out, curling my hands around her waist and hauling her against me.

She comes easily, melting into my chest like she was made to fit there.

Like this is where she belongs.

"I'm so damn happy you're here," I rasp, ducking my head to rest my forehead against hers. "Because I fucking love you too, Sera. So much."

Her lips curve into a slow, sweet smile that makes my heart trip in my chest. "Yeah?"

"Yeah," I confirm, and then I'm kissing her, pouring everything I feel into the press of my mouth on hers.

She kisses me back just as fiercely, arms twining around my neck to hold me close.

I lose myself in the taste of her, the feel of her soft curves against my body.

Nothing else exists in this moment.

Not the club, not whatever shit might be waiting for us on the other side of these gates.

Just her and me, and this thing between us that's so much bigger than either of us could have ever expected.

When we finally break apart, we're both breathing hard.

Seraphina looks up at me, eyes hazy with desire and so much love it steals my breath.

I know it's reflected in my own gaze.

I brush my knuckles along the delicate line of her jaw, marveling at the fact that I get to touch her like this.

That she's mine, in all the ways that matter.

"So what now?" I ask quietly, half-afraid of the answer.

But Seraphina just smiles, pressing another soft kiss to my lips. "Now, we figure it out together. One day at a time."

Together.

I like the sound of that.

I nod, threading our fingers together and turning toward the clubhouse.

Toward our future, whatever it might bring.

Seraphina smiles, eyes twinkling under the stars. "Lead the way, baby."