Chapter 10

You're not a love guru

I was named after my father.

I remember my mom telling me one night as she tucked me into bed. I was about seven years old, and even then, I knew it wasn't a good thing. She spoke softly, probably trying to make it sound okay, but it just made me feel worse. From that moment, I hated my name. I didn't want any connection to him, even if it was just our shared name.

I always wondered if she ever looked at me and thought about him. If she ever saw a part of him in me. If she thought we were the same.

My phone rings in my hand, and I stare at the contact name, a shiver crawling up my spine. I can't escape him. Even after moving to the other side of the world, I still can't escape him. Hearing my own name is a constant reminder, because it's his name too.

I hit decline and fling my phone onto the couch. Leaning forward, I bury my head in my hands, thoughts racing. I hope that he doesn't find out I'm back in America.

"Hey, you there?" The voice breaks through my thoughts.

Peeling my hands away, I glance down at my headset resting on the couch, and I slide it back onto my head. "Yeah. I'm here."

"Where did you go?" Liam asks.

"I just...had a call," I reply, my voice trailing off.

The game kicks off when we hit play, and I get lost in it. It's been a while since I've played with the guys, and I kinda miss it. But I've missed Gabi even more. We've been catching up for the past week, and it feels like time has flown by in a blur.

"So, how's life back in America?" Liam asks.

I chuckle, feeling a weight lift off my shoulders. "Better than London."

"Fuck off," he scoffs. "London will always be better."

I shake my head, grinning. London is cool, but wherever Gabi is, is where I'd rather be.

"Seriously though," he says. "How's it been?"

"It's been good," I reply with a smile, thinking of Gabi. "Nice to catch up with everyone again."

"You went to see her, didn't you?" Liam's voice is teasing.

"Dude," I reply, rolling my eyes.

"What?" he says with a laugh. "Can't blame me for asking about the girl you can't stop talking about."

Yeah, okay, maybe I've rambled on a bit too much about Gabi. It was really hard being away from her, especially for as long as I was. But...the longer I stayed away, the easier it was to keep my distance, even though every fiber of my being missed her like crazy. "Actually, we're, uh… living together."

"Fucking hell, you move fast."

"It's not like that," I confirm, with a shake of my head. "Just shut up and play the damn game."

He laughs. "Fine, I won't pry. But you're happy, yeah?"

The door swings open, and I glance over to see Gabi entering the apartment, her headphones in place as usual, and her gym bag slung over her shoulder.

"Yeah," I reply to Liam, a smile spreading across my face at the sight of her. Living with my best friend again means I get to see her every day, and we can have gaming marathons until two in the morning, falling asleep together. Sure, I'm still hopelessly in love with her and can't do anything about it, but other than that... "I couldn't be happier."

"Oh, hey," she says, catching me staring at her. "You're up."

I chuckle. "Dance class went well?" I ask, sliding my headset around my neck.

"Yeah," she replies, pulling her bag off her body with a sigh. "It was tiring, but I feel all bendy now." Her smirk widens, and she wiggles her eyebrows.

Fuck, I love her. There's no one else in the world that gets me like she does. No one else that can make me laugh, or smile like she does. No one else that has every inch of my heart and soul like she does. There's only her, and I think it's only ever going to be her.

Even if I can't have her.

"We can play a game together if you want," I offer with a shrug. "I was just finishing up with the guys."

"Sure," she says, leaning down to pull off her sneakers. "I'll just get changed, and I'll be right out."

"I'll wait," I reply, watching as she disappears into her bedroom and closes the door behind her.

"Who was that?" Liam's voice breaks through the headset, and I freeze, realizing I had forgotten the guys were listening in. Whenever Gabi walks into the room, the whole world stops for me. It's been like that for as long as I can remember. Sliding the headset back on, I quickly adjust my mic and resume the game. "No one."

"Oh shit," Liam says with a laugh. "That was her, wasn't it?"

"Who?" Tom asks. "Someone fill me in here."

"The girl Chris never stops talking about. I swear the dickhead has her name tattooed somewhere on his body."

"I definitely don't."

"Wait a minute," Tom says, sounding surprised. "Why the hell didn't I know you had a girlfriend? Is it new?"

Tom and I aren't as close, so he doesn't know about Gabi, or how I feel about her. And while I wasn't planning on sharing the details of my non-existent love life, it turns out these guys are even bigger gossips than Gabi.

"She's not my girlfriend," I reply with a sigh. "She's…" Everything. My whole world. The reason my heart beats. "She's just… my girl."

"Your girl?" Liam snorts. "Bro, you're in deep."

"I'm gonna hop off."

"Avoiding the question, I see," Liam replies, amusement lacing his words.

"Bye," I say, exiting the game.

"You didn't have to leave just for me," Gabi's voice breaks through, and I tear off my headset, freezing in place. How long has she been standing there? Did she hear me call her my girl? I hope to hell she didn't.

"No, it's fine," I reply. "They were being annoying. I'd much rather play with you."

She smiles, and as always, my eyes drink her in, savoring every detail of her beautiful face, her stunning blue eyes, and her dark hair that always smells like the sweetest coconut.

Gabi drops down onto the couch beside me, her legs folding into a criss-cross position as she reaches for the other controller.

"Were you working on Real Unleashed?" I can't help but smirk, hearing the project I've poured countless hours into being mentioned by her. "I'm dying to see it."

"No, not today," I answer, firing up our favorite racing game. "It still needs a lot of work before it ever reaches your eyes," I admit with a smile. Balancing creating my own videogame with my role at Horizon Creations is a challenge. I hardly get the chance to explore all the features I want to add.

"I could always help you," she says, tearing her gaze from the screen to flash me a smile that makes my heart race. How does she still have this effect on me after all these years? "You know I'm great inspiration."

I chuckle before admitting, "Actually, I, uh..." I clear my throat, feeling a flush creep up my cheeks. "I designed a character inspired by you."

She freezes, turning her head to face me with wide eyes. "You did?"

"Yeah," I admit with a shrug, feeling my heart pound in my chest. "You helped me come up with the idea in the first place," I tell her. "Of course I would."

Gabi was crazy about Jumanji when she was younger. I swear, she must've seen that movie a million times. She was obsessed with the idea of getting sucked into a real-life game. So, when I was brainstorming my own little game a while back, I came up with the concept of four characters waking up on a beach, and then suddenly the whole island turns into this giant game, and they have to find a secret passage to get back home.

Gabi was the very first character I crafted.

Georgina is a badass dark haired and piercing-blue eyed character who takes on the role of the group's leader.

And the second character I designed was Connor . He's Georgina's best friend, and completely obsessed with her.

I might have made their inspirations a little too obvious, but considering Gabi won't lay eyes on the final game for a while, I won't sweat about it just yet.

But thoughts swirl in my mind about when she'll realize that the character based on me is head over heels for the character based on her, and how soon she'll connect the dots to real life.

"Fuck yeah." I snap out of my thoughts, redirecting my attention to the TV where Gabi effortlessly crosses the checkpoint, leaving me miles behind.

"How the hell?" I mutter, narrowing my eyes at the screen, determined to catch up with her.

"Not my fault you were distracted," she says with a smirk, her focus unwavering on the screen as she races toward the finish line. "You shouldn't have been daydreaming."

What would she say if she knew she was the one I was thinking about?

Who I'm always thinking about.

"Looks like I'm about to lap you," she says with a grin.

"No way am I letting that happen," I mutter, crossing all of the shortcuts as I close in on her.

"What?" she huffs, stealing a quick glance at me. "You're such a cheater."

"Are you kidding?" I retort with a laugh. "You took advantage of the fact that I wasn't even playing."

She tuts, trying to move away from me in the game. "That's being a genius, not cheating."

I laugh, maneuvering closer toward her car until I'm right beside it. She nudges my elbow, making my car drift off course, and I narrow my eyes at her. "Look who's cheating now."

"Shut up. You win all the time."

"And I'm about to win, again," I tell her, hitting the back of her car, causing it to spin out of control.

"You little—" She turns her attention toward me, her hand reaching for my controller. "Gimme."

"No fucking way," I reply with a laugh, a grin spreading across my face as she tries to grab the controller from my hands. "Stop trying to tackle me. It's not going to work."

Somehow she maneuvers herself to straddle me, determined to grab the controller which makes us both to topple to the ground. "Jesus," I grunt when I roll to the floor. "You really hate losing, huh?" I tease with a smirk, lifting the controller out of her reach.

"I wasn't losing," she pants, trying to reach for my controller. "You were cheating."

"You're literally tackling me to the floor," I point out, arching a brow.

"Then do something about it," she says, a mischievous grin creeping on her face. "Unless you're too weak."

I grin, dropping the controller to the floor above my head as I grip her waist in my hands. With a swift movement, I flip us over so now I'm on top of her, pinning her arms above her head with one hand.

"How the hell?" she mutters, eyebrows furrowed in surprise.

"You underestimate me, pretty girl. Just because I let you take control, doesn't mean I'm weak," I say with a smirk.

Her eyes widen at the nickname I haven't used in forever, and the smile slips off my face when I realize I'm lying on top of her, pinning her hands underneath mine. My gaze drifts down to Gabi's chest, rising and falling with each deep breath. My eyes squint when I notice two small metal bars under the white tank top she's wearing, and the air gets sucked out of my lungs.

Holy fuck.

I look into her eyes, the bright blue staring right back at me, widening as her breaths grow deeper and faster. My hand around her waist tightens, and my eyes drift down to her lips. What the hell am I doing? I can't think straight right now. I've wanted her for so damn long. I can't even remember a time when I didn't want this girl.

"Chris," Gabi whispers, her tongue darting out to lick her lips.

"Surprise!" Our eyes widen when the front door opens, and voices fills the room. "We're all… Wait. Where the hell are they?" a deep voice says.

Gabi and I exchange wide-eyed glances as we hear them enter the apartment. Quickly, I lift myself off her and try to compose myself, the moment between us completely shattered.

Gabi jumps up, letting out a breath as she narrows her eyes at them. "You guys could have knocked."

"You told us it was supposed to be a surprise," Madi says, holding up a wine bottle in her hand, her brows furrowed as she looks between us.

"Yeah, well, I changed my mind," Gabi says with a sigh. "Knock next time."

Their eyes turn to me, and I run a hand through my disheveled hair, feeling my heart start to race. I really hate being the center of attention.

Aiden smirks, glancing between us. "Did we interrupt something?"

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

"You interrupted me beating Chris's ass at a game," Gabi replies with a smirk I don't know what to make of.

What just happened back there has never happened before, and I'm freaking out about it while she's laughing it off.

"Really?" Aiden asks with a laugh, arching a brow. "I thought you were a pro or something."

I huff out a laugh, shaking my head. "She cheated."

Grayson makes a noise of agreement, sitting down on the arm of the couch, his arm wrapped around Rosie's waist. "Don't I know it. It's the only way she wins."

"He was distracted," Gabi replies with a shrug. "I just took that as my advantage."

And it was all fun and games until we ended up on the floor, my body pinned to hers, mere inches away from her lips, and I nearly did something we'd both regret.

Jesus.

"What are you guys doing here anyway?" I ask, shooting a glance at Gabi. "Did I forget they were coming by?"

Gabi glances at me. First time she's looked at me since whatever the hell happened between us. "I know you hate crowds, and parties so I thought it would be nice if we all hung out together in a more quiet place."

My heart picks up pace, pumping with all the love I have for her. Meeting her friends was fun as hell, but being surrounded by that many people was a lot for me. I tried to act like I was okay, focusing on breathing and concentrating on Gabi, but she could sense it. Of course she could. That girl knows me better than anyone else.

"I should have probably asked you first," she says with a laugh as she takes a step closer. "I just thought it would be fun for us all to hang out again."

I smile down at her. "It was a great idea."

"You sure?" she says, taking another step closer to me. I can't breathe when I'm around her. Or think at all, clearly, because I pull her into me and wrap my arms around her.

"Yeah, Gabi," I say. "Thank you."

"Uh… I hate to interrupt whatever's going on," Madi says, breaking up the moment between Gabi and I as she pulls away from me. Fuck. I forgot they were in the room. "But I can't find my wine glasses anywhere."

" Your wine glasses?" Gabi asks, lifting her brow. "If I remember correctly, you moved out. They're not yours anymore."

Madi rolls her eyes. "I bought them."

"And left them here," Gabi says with a grin. "They're mine now."

Madi narrows her eyes at Gabi. "Did you move them?"

Gabi shrugs. "Might have."

"Why the hell did you move them?"

Gabi sighs, dramatically. "I wanted to get back at you."

Madi shoots her a dry look. "By moving my wine glasses?"

Gabi just grins back. "It's annoying you though, isn't it?"

Madeline lets out a groan. "Just… show me where they are so we can drink some wine."

With a chuckle, Gabi walks toward the kitchen, motioning for Madi to follow as she shows her where she hid the glasses.

"You okay?" Aiden's voice pulls me from my thoughts, and I turn to find him standing beside me, concern etched on his face.

"Of course," I reply, running a hand through my hair.

"Yeah?" He gestures toward Gabi with a nod of his head, a knowing look in his eyes. "When we walked in, it looked like you guys were—"

"We weren't," I finish for him. "She just tackled me to the ground to try and rip the controller out of my hands." My lips twitch, a chuckle escaping me. "I assume that was something you taught her?"

He shakes his head, holding up his hands. "That's all her. I don't need to play dirty." He grins. "I know we don't really know each other, but I feel like I do with how much Gabi talks about you."

I'm reminded of the fact that Gabi confided in Aiden with something she felt like she couldn't tell me. But the fact that she also talked about me, to the point where Aiden feels like he knows me, makes me smile.

"She does?" I ask him.

He smirks, nodding. "Yeah, man. She doesn't really talk about much else."

Grayson groans, sitting on the couch. "I find that hard to believe," he says with a dry look. "Gabi loves to talk."

I let out a laugh, knowing that's true. Nights of us talking until the sun rose come to mind. Gabi somehow always had something to say, something to tell me, to talk about. And I just loved hearing her voice until we both drifted to sleep.

"How's it been?" Aiden asks. "Living with her?"

"Great," I tell him, glancing back at Gabi who's now fighting Madi for the corkscrew. Madeline's boyfriend, Lucas watches with an amused look on her face. "She's my best friend, I missed the hell out of her."

He hums, nodding thoughtfully. "Is that all?"

I turn my attention to Aiden, furrowing my brows at his question. "What do you mean?"

"Is she only your best friend?" Aiden clarifies.

My pulse quickens as I lick my dry lips. "I don't—"

"You don't have to tell me," he interrupts, raising his shoulder. "You can if you want, but I think I already know."

"You…" I furrow my brows. "You know?"

"Yeah," he replies with a smirk. "I can tell."

I frown. "How?"

He grins, and I don't even mind that I've basically confessed my feelings for Gabi to a guy I hardly know. "I'm good at this stuff. I could tell with him," he says, gesturing toward Grayson. "It was as clear as day how he felt for Rosie, even if he was an idiot about it."

"Fuck off," Grayson replies with a scowl.

"And I could tell with Lucas and Madi," Aiden continues. "Those two were about as subtle as fire." He chuckles. "And I can tell with you."

I swallow, feeling a knot form in my stomach. "She's my best friend," I tell him. "That's all there is between us." It's not a lie, not technically. But it's definitely not how I feel about her.

"If you say so," he grins, clearly not buying my attempt to hide all the feelings I've kept buried all these years. "But if you want some help, I'm your guy."

"Stop trying to meddle in their relationship," Grayson interjects. "You're not a love guru."

"I could be," Aiden counters. "I got my girl like that," he says, snapping his fingers.

Grayson scoffs. "Such bullshit. She didn't even like you at first."

Aiden sighs. "Okay, fine. That's true. But after a few months and a lot of convincing, it was as easy as that." He snaps his fingers again, and I let out a laugh. "Trust me. I can help you get her."

"Oh great." I snap my head at Gabi's voice. "Aiden's found a twin."

Leila snorts. "He's about five inches taller than Chris. Wouldn't exactly call him a twin." She lowers herself down on his lap and Aiden grins, snaking an arm around her waist to pull her back into him. It's a little shocking to believe she didn't like him when they're attached at the hip.

Gabi finds her place beside me, holding a glass of wine. "I thought they'd bring food, or beer, not this," she says, taking a sip.

I let out a laugh. "Not much of a wine drinker?"

She shrugs. "As long as it can get me drunk, it'll do." I catch the uncertainty flickering in her eyes as she lifts her wine glass, holding it up to me. It's a moment just between us, a reminder of the memories we share. Without a second thought, I reach down, taking her glass, and bring it to my lips, taking a sip, reassuring her that nothing has changed between us.

"Are you telling me I'm going to have to deal with drunk Gabi?" I tease, letting out a soft chuckle.

She grins back. "Get drunk with me, and you won't have to worry about that," she suggests. "Besides, I tend to come up with my best ideas when I'm drunk."

Another laugh escapes me. Some things never change with her. "I'm scared," I joke.

"I'm serious," she insists with an eye roll.

"Me too," I say, arching a brow "Did you forget the night we almost ended up in jail?" I remind her, the memory still vivid in my mind.

She tuts, shaking her head. "That, Hudson, is what I like to call… inspiration ."