Chapter Thirty-One

ROW

oBITCHuary: Hello.

McMonster: Hi.

oBITCHuary: So…

oBITCHuary: I went back and read through our chats. I totally admitted to you that I'm attracted to my shitty boss, didn't I?

McMonster: Yup.

oBITCHuary: Enjoying the ego stroke?

McMonster: I'd enjoy it more if you aim south. And, you know, use your tongue.

oBITCHuary: I'm never going to be able to look you in the eye.

McMonster: May I suggest other organs that will welcome your attention, then?

oBITCHuary: I'm so terrified I'm going to yield to temptation.

McMonster: Don't worry, I'm sure I'll fuck it up before we get to it.

oBITCHuary: WHY are you even interested? You could have any woman in the world.

McMonster: And you're that woman. Where's the mystery?

oBITCHuary: I'm completely normal.

McMonster: Respectfully, Cal, you're not.

oBITCHuary: LOL. I meant average.

McMonster: You're not that either.

oBITCHuary: What am I, then?

McMonster: If I have a say about it? Mine.