Chapter 19

CHAPTER 19

L ouise lay in the bed, staring at the ceiling and trying to catch her breath. Her body was pliant and soft, the curve of her back smooth against the cool sheets.

She looked down her still naked body to Christian, who was leaning against the bed, his head turned away from her.

Slowly, she pulled her robe around herself again and sat up. Christian rose also and turned to her with a soft smile, holding out his hand. She took it, and he pulled her out of bed, before tenderly wrapping her robe around her.

“Are you well?” he asked.

Louise watched him carefully, sensing a change in him that she wasn’t certain what it meant. “Quite well. Are you?”

He kissed her cheek. It was strangely formal, and she felt a shiver that had nothing to do with pleasure run down her spine.

“I am very well, I assure you,” he said casually and went to the chair beside the bed to fetch her nightgown.

Louise watched his lazy movements. Without his coat on, he looked disheveled and informal, but his expression made her uneasy.

He seems dismissive suddenly, as though he already got what he wanted and now he will move on.

He returned to her, holding her nightgown, and she felt an odd desire to cover herself. As if he heard her thoughts, he slowly peeled her robe off her shoulders and pulled her nightgown over her head.

As the fabric slid over her head and his face was revealed to her again, the distance in his eyes had waned, and she was flooded with relief.

“That was wonderful,” he said, his tone genuine. “I told you we could still give each other pleasure without breaking your rule.”

Louise smiled faintly. “Will you sleep here?” she asked. But as soon as the words left her lips, she knew the question had been a mistake.

Christian’s easy manner evaporated, and he stepped back, glancing at the window.

It was almost four o’clock in the morning, but it was still dark outside. The street below, usually rumbling with movement, was utterly silent. Louise shivered as a chilly draft seeped through the window.

“No, I shall return to my room.” The words sounded forced, and the smile he gave her was not the easy, genuine one he had given her only moments ago. “I hope you enjoyed yourself.”

Does he know how dismissive that sounds?

Christian straightened, leveling her with a thoughtful stare. “This marriage is what we intended it to be,” he added. “It will be nothing more than a respectful agreement. Pleasure can still be involved, but we don’t have to act as if we are in love. It is not as though that will exist in our future, is it?”

Louise felt cold to her core. It was true—they did not love one another, but she felt as though he had used her and cast her aside when he was finished. Anger flared in her gut.

“And sleeping in my bed means you are in love with me, doesn’t it?” she snapped.

He laughed it off as he picked up his coat and draped it over his arm, smoothing it until it was perfectly straight.

“It would set a precedent neither of us is interested in.” She opened her mouth to say more, but he raised his hand to silence her. “No buts, Duchess. I expect you to obey me in this.”

And with that, he walked out the door, leaving her uncomfortably flustered in the quiet room.

As sadness bubbled to the surface, she began to regret everything they had done together. But as the embarrassment threatened to overwhelm her, she heard a faint meow coming from the floor and looked down to find the kitten circling her feet. She bent down to pick it up and held it close to her chest, feeling the softness of its fur.

She climbed into bed, and the kitten made a little nest for itself on the pillow beside her. She stroked its fur until it was settled and then pulled the sheets over them both.

Not entirely alone, after all.

The next morning, Louise woke up with a headache.

Her maid came to dress her, but there were many delays due to excessive fussing over the cat. Despite her melancholy, her maid’s excitement at having a pet in the house did bring a smile to her face.

It was early, and she had not slept very well. As the first light of dawn had crested the horizon, its faint rays had woken her from a fitful sleep, and she’d lain awake, watching the sunrise.

I knew Christian was detached, but I never expected such clinical precision when we lay together for the first time.

She sighed as the buttons on her gown were fastened, and she picked up the kitten and took it downstairs. Christian was not up yet, and she breakfasted alone, pleased to have a respite from his company.

She was frustrated with herself, unable to stop thinking about the night before and how much she had enjoyed it. As she cut some sausage for the kitten and put it in the small bowl beside her, she felt a familiar pulse in her groin at the memory of Christian’s tongue on the most intimate part of her body.

I did not know that men could do that or that it could feel so wonderful.

Pushing away the thought, she forced down some toast and listened to the bustle of the servants around the house. It sounded as though a bell rang, and she quickly rose from the table to leave before Christian could come down and disturb her.

As she left the breakfast room, she checked the corridor for any sign of him, finding that she had an intense desire to avoid him today. With the kitten cradled against her chest, she made her way to the library. She opened the door to the silent solitude of books and closed it behind her with a sigh of relief.

There was a large armchair before the fire, and she made for it, sitting with her feet up and the kitten in her lap, watching the tiny creature navigate the undulating terrain of her skirts.

She lifted the kitten and looked into its large green eyes. “We must find a name for you, I think,” she said thoughtfully.

The kitten mewed, the black tufts of fur on the tips of its ears quivering with the sound.

“Perhaps I should name you Christine,” Louise mused. “Christian would be most displeased.”

She chuckled to herself, rising from the chair to pick out a book that might distract her until she could come up with another excuse to avoid Christian at lunch. A part of her hoped he would seek her out, but she knew it was folly to even think of it.

“It will be nothing more than a respectful agreement.”

“Respectful,” she scoffed as she sat back in her chair, frowning at the fire. “What is respectful about barging into my room in the middle of the night and then leaving without so much as a backward glance?”

She opened her book and began to read, but the words blurred together, and she could not get her mind to concentrate on the story. She tried again for ten minutes before sighing with exasperation.

Pulling one of the ribbons from her hair, she placed the kitten on the floor and had her chase the ribbon around the armchair for some time. Its tiny legs struggled to keep up, but it was a feisty creature and clearly had a strong will to survive.

A knock sounded at the door, and a maid entered, a happy laugh escaping her lips as she saw the kitten play.

“Good morning, Your Grace,” she greeted in a pleasantly lilting voice. “A great number of parcels have arrived for you today.”

Louise frowned, bending to retrieve the kitten before she followed the maid into the corridor. They made for the main entrance hall, where, sure enough, there were ten or so large parcels wrapped in soft cloth and tied with slim ribbons.

Louise gently handed the kitten to the maid and looked them over, confused as to where they had come from. They were all addressed to her.

With rising excitement, she pulled the cloth off one of the larger parcels and found a box inside. When she opened the lid, she was met with an exquisite gown of dark red, embroidered all over with gold thread. It was the finest dress she had ever seen—her father would only ever buy her new clothes when he needed her to look presentable for an event.

There were so many boxes that she was quite overwhelmed. The next one she opened contained a far plainer dress, with a simple design and loose stays for ease of movement.

“It is for gardening.”

She spun around, almost tripping over her feet upon hearing the deep voice behind her. Christian was standing there, watching her with an expectant expression, his eyes just as dark as they had been the night before.

A shiver of awareness ran through her as he looked her up and down briefly, but the heat in his eyes was unmistakable.

Then, she remembered she was furious with him and put her hands on her hips.

“You have bought all of these for me?” she asked.

Christian straightened his coat. “There may be one or two items for myself.” His ears turned a little pink, and her eyes widened in surprise.

I have never seen him in anything but the latest fashions. Is he embarrassed that enjoys perfecting his appearance?

“Are you not going to thank me?” he asked archly, and she scowled at him. A slow smile spread across his lips, and she rolled her eyes at his audacity.

“I am very grateful. This gown is beautiful, but what is this all about?”

Christian stepped forward. His hair was styled casually this morning, his cravat slightly askew.

“I am a man of my word,” he said, inclining his head. “I told you I would purchase some dresses for you so that you did not have to wear anything too fine in the gardens. These are the said dresses.”

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a folded letter, which he handed to her. She looked it over—it was an invitation.

“You can wear one of them to the Barringtons’ ball tonight. Do not be late,” he instructed firmly.

Clearly, being late for one breakfast means I cannot be trusted to manage my time.

Christian’s frown deepened as the maid almost lost her hold on the kitten, who was squirming and straining to reach him.

Louise took the kitten in her arms, the note crumpling between her fingers as she tried to juggle them both.

“What is that thing still doing here?” Christian asked heatedly.

“Where did you expect me to put her? Out on the streets?” Louise shot back.

“Oh, it is a male, Your Grace,” the maid blurted out, then snapped her mouth shut, looking at Christian warily.

Louise turned to her in amazement. “A male?”

“Yes, Your Grace. I grew up on a farm. We had several cats that were used to keep the rats away. It’s a male, for certain.”

Louise looked down at the little bundle in her arms and laughed. “Well, that is wonderful. I finally have a name for him.”

Christian rubbed an exasperated hand over his forehead. “Have you, indeed? And what are you going to call it?”

“Jack,” Louise said with a grin. “His name is Jack Frost, seeing as he is owned by the Ice Queen.”