5. Tad

As I poured another gallon of milk down the drain, I shook my head in annoyance. Okay, maybe it wasn't a full gallon. It was probably closer to a pint, but it felt like a gallon. Actually, it felt like ten gallons the way it had been dripping from me all day.

Maybe I should cancel my appointment with Oliver? Or postpone it until I had a better handle on my situation. Then again, if Collin was to be trusted, Oliver was a great person to help me with this.

The information Collin shared about how he resells his milk was like discovering a new language. It totally blew my mind. I had no idea there was an entire industry built around chest milk and that it was so lucrative.

Reselling wasn't something I was interested in because I hated the damn pump almost as much as it hated me. But it was nice to know that something good could come out of this shit show that had quickly become my life.

If I couldn't leave the house for more than two hours at a time without becoming a sticky mess, at least I knew I'd always be able to make a few bucks if I ever needed to.

Collin gave me a link to a company that makes clothing to absorb leaks. But since their shipping time was two weeks out, I had to shove maxi pads inside my shirt and double-layer it just to get through the day.

How did people survive this?

I glanced at my watch and had to make a decision. It was just after nine. If I was going to flake on Oliver, I needed to do it now before he got ready or left his place.

After staring at the horrific pump for a solid minute, I grabbed it and strapped on the cups. It hurt and didn't seem to fully empty me, but at least I'd be able to get through the day without pouring down my shirt.

Hopefully.

And I was going to meet with Oliver. I couldn't bail on him after he was so sweet in his text, and I really needed a friend who understood what I was going through. Or, at least someone who understood my situation and I could speak freely with.

According to Collin, Oliver was a perfect customer who truly appreciated the milk he provided. I wasn't entirely sure what that meant for me, but I needed to find out. If I had any hope of surviving this situation, I needed to know exactly what my options were.

All my options.

I walked into the coffee shop a few minutes before ten and ordered one of each muffin and two cups of coffee with room for milk. An errant thought of me squirting directly into the cup made me grin as I picked a table by the door.

Oliver would be arriving any?—

The door swung open and a guy with a light yellow t-shirt and jeans walked in, and his eyes instantly locked with mine.

"Oliver?" I stood up and took a step away from the table.

He nodded and smiled widely. "Tad?" His thumb went to his mouth, and he bit the tip of it as he gave me a quick once-over. "You're even older than Collin."

My jaw dropped, and I wasn't sure how to respond to that. Did he expect me to be young? Did Collin mislead him into believing I was…different? "Oh, sorry…"

"No, don't be." He lowered his head, and his tongue slipped between the seam of his lips as he stepped closer. "That's a good thing. I love a silver-fox Daddy."

A what now? Granted, I had a few grays coming in around the sides, but…silver fox? Although, the fact that he recognized me as a Daddy was pretty awesome.

"Sorry. That was supposed to stay in my head." His cheeks pinked up at the same time that his arm shot out, stopping at exactly the right height to shake mine. "It's nice to meet you."

"Um, it's nice to meet you too, Oliver." I shook his hand and then pulled out the chair across from mine. "Please, have a seat."

"Thanks, Tad." His eyes seemed to bounce from my face to my chest, and I wondered if I was leaking through.

Fortunately, I was saved from that humiliation when the barista called my name, and I had to excuse myself to get our order. "I'll be right back." As I left him sitting at the table, I snuck a peek down at my chest and everything seemed to be dry.

For now, at least.

With a tray of muffins and two black coffees, I returned to the table. "I promised you self-defense muffins and coffee."

He grinned and reached for a double chocolate chip muffin. "This one is for eating. I'll save the carrot cake for throwing, just in case."

"Fair enough." I lifted a hot mug from the tray and placed it in front of him. "I didn't know what kind of extras you like, so you might need to doctor it up."

"I love the way black coffee smells, so I'll just breathe it in for a minute." He wrapped both hands around the wide mug and pulled it closer for a whiff. "But yeah, I'll need a bunch of milk and sugar to make it drinkable."

There were a few jokes on the tip of my tongue, but I let them stay there. I wasn't sure how to break the ice on this topic I was still uncomfortable with, but it was probably better to just rip off the band-aid. "So, thanks for coming. Collin said you're an expert on…the situation."

"Well, expert is a bit generous but…" He coughed out an embarrassed groan. "I guess I am a bit of a connoisseur."

I wasn't sure how to respond to that. "I'll be honest, I'm still in shock that any of this even exists. I didn't know it was possible for me to make milk, for guys like Collin to sell it, or for boys like you to want it."

"I really do." Oliver nodded vigorously and picked a piece of muffin off the top before he popped it into his mouth, no longer making eye contact with me. "I love it. And when Collin said you needed some…um, training, I guess, I was really happy to help."

"Yeah, I'm kinda winging it." Instinctively, I rubbed across my chest, soothing the pain and confirming that it was all still dry. "The pump hurts like hell and doesn't fully work. I'm just not sure what I'm doing wrong."

"Probably nothing." He finally met my gaze again. "But the pump will only go so far. It's not as good as…" He shrugged, and his eyes dropped to my chest. "Well, the real thing."

The real thing? "So, you mean…human to human?"

He was quiet for a moment before he seemed to muster up his courage and just laid his cards on the table. "Yeah, exactly. Collin suggested that some personal sessions might help you feel better but also become more comfortable with, well…your milk."

I swallowed hard, knowing he was right. "If you're willing to help, then yeah, I'd appreciate that. I'm not sure how to do…anything, basically. So I'll take all the help I can get."