SKYE.2

A few days later, an important date came around. It had been a full month since Soren's heat. That day, I decided to bring up something that had been bothering me more and more. So, I sat down at the kitchen table after serving him dinner and said,

"Would you be willing to go see a doctor with me?"

Soren jerked his head up from his plate, his gray eyes locking onto mine like a hawk's.

"For what purpose?! I've been to the doctors so many times, and it's never changed anything."

"But would you do it for me? I've never been to that kind of appointment," I said quietly, moving my plate away.

He sighed, irritated. "What's the point? So you can listen to its heartbeat? Or so you can get attached to it?" Oh, how bitter he sounded, even though his reaction wasn't surprising, still it somewhat hit me, so I closed my eyes, feeling strange.

"I just want to know it existed, even if it disappears quickly. I want that memory because it means something, right? Like a candle that burns out fast, but I'll keep the memory alive. It'll make it… more special, more real. It'll bring it out of nothingness."

Soren cursed under his breath and stood up abruptly from the table.

"No! I won't be tormented! I won't be dragged into this again, these false hopes, these attempts to find meaning where there isn't any. I just want to stop thinking about it. That's all I want, Skye… for it to be already over!"

I watched him for a moment, almost physically sensing that he was trembling inside. But I also felt something else, something strange, very unexpected. Deep down, Soren wanted to bring that small life out of nothingness just as much as I did. Our odd quasi-telepathic connection told me that without a doubt. A part of him was aching for it to mean more than just… fleeting pain.

"You've been through this before, this loss, and you don't want to go through it again. I respect that. But would you agree to go to the appointment with me? After the exam, you could leave and wait in the hallway while I talk to the doctor. You wouldn't have to be involved. It would be just for me—"

"But why?!" he burst out. "Why do you want to stir this up? Why do you want to torture yourself? It doesn't make sense. In another month, it'll all be gone, vanished into the void…" His lips trembled.

I stared down at my plate, feeling a sharp pain in my heart. At that moment, I knew he felt it too. Whatever this bond between us was, it seemed to be growing stronger, working both ways—connecting us tightly. Now every intense emotion could be felt vividly and clearly.

Soren stared at me for a long time, struggling with it. Then he walked over to the window and looked out. The city was already glittering with evening lights, a soft glow painted across the gray sky, distant and elusive.

"Ugh, here I am, being a selfish bitch again. I guess you have a right to experience your share of the loss, too." He sighed, resigned. "Fine, I agree. We can go to the appointment. I'll let the doctor examine me, then I'll leave and wait in the hallway. "

"Thank you," I whispered, lowering my head.

"Well, out of all the things you've asked of me, this is definitely one of those you should thank me for. It's a big sacrifice on my part," he said coldly.

"That's why I'm thanking you. I really appreciate it. I know how much it costs you."

He looked out the window for a moment, then said quietly, "Now, take me to bed. I want to forget. I don't want to think."

So, I did what he asked.