SKYE

The first day on Soren's team was a strange experience. I tried really hard to do my job well because I also wanted to prove to Winter that I wasn't here just because of Soren (although, let's be honest, I was). I did what I had to do as best as I could, and before lunch, Soren made his rounds to each desk, reviewing the code the other employees had written. Finally, he came to me. This time, I didn't hide anything in the code. I just showed him the results of my work.

He analyzed it for a moment, while I watched his beautiful face—his soft lips, the delicate line of his jaw, and his straight, elegant nose. I stared at his black hair slicked back and his barbed wire tattoo. His hand rested on my mouse, which gave me a strange pleasure. His palm was small, pale, with a few silver rings that I studied closely. I also watched the line of his neck and shoulders, and the way his back bent as he leaned over my screen.

It goes without saying that the whole time I was watching him, I was hard.

"Everything looks good," Soren said, avoiding my gaze.

"Yes, everything looks good," I whispered, my eyes locked on him, and he had to know that it included him.

But he ignored it. "Tomorrow you'll get another piece; it'll be a continuation of this part."

About ten minutes later, we headed down for lunch. Soren went out first, and the rest of us followed. I saw him standing by the elevator doors next to Liam.

Liam fixed a frosty stare on me that, if looks could kill, would have killed me right then and there, shattering my body into a million pieces. I smirked at him—more of a mocking grin, really. I knew I needed to stay patient. Even though I let those sentences slip today and put them on the screen for Soren to see, I hadn't made any other moves that might suggest what I was up to.

I was curious if he'd tell Liam about what I'd done, but I had a strange feeling he didn't… I was almost sure of it. That is, if he wanted some peace.

During lunch, Liam and Soren took their seats separately from the team, while I sat with the other employees. Devon and Fay, two omegas, were next to me on either side. They asked me about where I'd worked before and my college days. I didn't say anything about my past with Soren, even though they already knew I'd known him from college. His name didn't come up. They complained a little about how the previous projects had been managed in the past under Manager Durden, and I heard some company gossip. For instance, they mentioned that the CEO's son was about to be hired in the graphics department, but nothing else interesting happened.

I spent the rest of the day in the room with them, but working for Nathaniel, as I had agreed with Winter. Soren, as it turned out, already knew about this arrangement and didn't approach me or assign me anything for the remaining hours.

When the day ended, I decided to leave the building at the same time as Soren. The situation got awkward. The three of us —Liam, Soren, and I—stood by the elevator doors, waiting for the car to arrive.

Liam looked at me, Soren looked at the elevator button, and I looked at Liam.

I gave him that same mischievous grin again. I didn't know why I was playing games with him like that. In a way, I felt sorry for him—his situation was nothing to envy. I wouldn't want to be in his shoes, that's for sure, especially knowing the chemistry that had existed between Soren and me back in college.

Unless… he didn't know about that? I had no idea what Soren had told him. Maybe he had downplayed our relationship and made it sound innocent?

The elevator dinged, and we all stepped inside. Unfortunately, we were alone again. I positioned myself so I could see Soren, who stubbornly stared at the floor.

Liam, meanwhile, was glaring at me.

Thump thump, thump thump, went his heart.

Thump thump, thump thump, went Soren's heart.

The betas couldn't hear the escalating sound spectacle filling the elevator now, loud and intense.

This time, I didn't return Liam's gaze; I kept my eyes fixed on Soren, admiring the lines of his back and waist, the contrast between his pale skin and jet-black silky hair, and his sensuous soft lips, deliciously full. It felt so pleasurable to let my eyes glide over his body, taking it all in.

Fuck, I wanted him. There was no denying it—I wanted him more than I had ever wanted anything or anyone in this world.

The elevator dinged again, and the doors opened. Soren stepped out first—no, he practically shot out of the doors like a missile—quickly heading toward the building exit and then to the parking lot. I followed him slowly, and Liam passed me to catch up with Soren. They both got into Liam's car, and Soren desperately avoided looking in my direction. It was almost funny.

But this was just the beginning. I was optimistic—if he truly hated me and didn't want anything to do with me, he could've kicked me off his team. But he hadn't.

***

The next week passed almost exactly like the first day. In the morning, Soren would assign me a piece of code to work on, and I tried my best, putting my heart into making sure my work was perfect. Soren never had to correct my code, not even once.

Everything settled into a routine. First, an assignment from Soren. Then work. Then the cafeteria, where Soren always sat with Liam while I sat with the other employees. After that, I worked for Nathaniel. The only difference was that now there were usually more people in the elevator. Soren consistently avoided looking at me, but I wasn't shy—I openly watched him, eyed him, ogled him.

During that first week, I also got the chance to see the company's new hire—the only other alpha besides me. I came across him once, standing in line in the cafeteria. His eyes lingered on my face for a moment; he was probably as surprised as I was to see another alpha.

His name was Sariel Lowen, and he looked really unusual. He had a typical alpha height, around 6'4", but his hair was an extraordinary color—mint green, the same as his intensely, almost unnaturally vibrant eyes.

Other than that, he was quite slim—didn't look like he spent much time at the gym. His face was striking, with high cheekbones dusted with mint-colored freckles and upturned eyes. Sariel was handsome in an almost exotic, alien way, but still very young-looking.

His features made me realize he might be part of the small ABO population with unusual hair colors—a trait inherited from our extraterrestrial ancestors. About 1% of the population had hair in shades like purple, green, or blue. I also noticed his eyebrows and eyelashes were a dark mint color, complementing his appearance.

We didn't speak, though—we just stared at each other for a few seconds. Just because we were both alphas, and the only ones at DevApp, didn't mean we'd automatically be best buddies.

***

It wasn't until the middle of the next week that the big breakthrough finally happened.

I was in the lunchroom, making tea, when Fay and Devon joined me. Soon, Jess and Randy showed up too. Devon and I sat at the table eating sandwiches, while Jess and Randy brewed coffee. Fay started sharing gossip about one of the employees, saying that apparently an omega had broken up with his beta boyfriend and started seeing another omega.

I listened quietly, in the meantime, Soren entered the room and headed straight to the coffee machine. He had his back to us, but of course, he could hear our conversation.

Fay kept talking about how strange some people's preferences could be.

"To be honest, I can't imagine what his heat will be like," he said.

Devon shrugged. "Lots of people spend their heat alone, just with a dildo. What's the big deal if they handle it together?"

"I'm not saying it's a problem, that's not what I mean. It's just… it's probably a challenge since they can't match the intensity, and it might be physically exhausting."

"If they're in love, they just have to deal with that," Devon mumbled, clearly unbothered by same-gender relationships.

"Sure, but you know what I mean—it's just a hassle, I guess," Fay replied, sounding slightly irritated.

When Devon stayed quiet, Fay turned to me and asked, "So, what's your subgender preference?" He probably expected me to say the obvious: omegas. But he was about to be surprised.

"I'm interested in betas."

Silence fell over the room.

Not only did Devon and Fay stare at me, but Jess and Randy, both betas, turned to look at me with surprise. The only person who didn't glance at me was Soren, who was still standing at the coffee machine. I could see his back and the tilt of his head, his long black ponytail hanging down. He was definitely listening, but he didn't react.

"Oh, well, that's interesting. How'd you figure that out?" Fay asked, eyes drilling into me with curiosity.

"I was in a relationship with an omega before, but it didn't work out. Certain aspects made the relationship unsustainable."

"Let me guess, he left you for a higher mate."

"Yeah. I don't want to take that risk again. And besides, I just like betas."

Jess and Randy were staring at me with wide eyes and open mouths, obviously shocked.

"What? Is there a problem?" I asked, slightly amused.

"No problem, it's just… not very common, you know?" Randy mumbled.

I shrugged. "It's my preference."

"So, what's your type?" Devon asked unexpectedly.

"What do you mean?"

"You know, your type. Looks."

I felt a bit awkward, like I was being interrogated, but since Soren was listening, maybe I could say something meant just for him.

"I like black hair, gray eyes, pale skin, tall, slim build."

I basically described Soren. I could see him standing completely still, listening intently.

"Wow, that's a pretty specific description. Got someone in mind?" Fay asked.

"Maybe I do."

Everyone leaned closer, looking like they were about to hear the gossip of the century. Only Soren remained at the coffee machine, turned away from us. It felt like everyone else hadn't even noticed him; he was so quiet.

"So, are you with someone right now?" Jess asked.

"No, unfortunately not."

"But you'd like to be?"

"Yes, I would. Very much."

Soren was still motionless; he could've filled ten cups of coffee by now.

"Oh, wow, so what happened?"

"He doesn't want me because I'm an alpha."

Silence fell over the room.

"Do you love him?" Devon asked.

"Yes."

As soon as I said it, Soren grabbed his cup and quickly walked out. No one else seemed to notice, not even the omegas, despite his heart beating quite loudly.

"I'm sorry. Maybe you can convince him somehow?" Fay offered.

"It's complicated. I don't have high hopes, but I'm not giving up."

There was another long silence before I stood up.

"Or perhaps I'm just destined for unrequited love," I said with a bitter smile.

"Don't give up," Devon murmured. "You never know how things will turn out in life."

"I'm not giving up. Nothing's certain yet; we'll see. I suspect everything will become clear in the next few weeks."

"Let us know how it goes," Jess muttered. "There are more than a few black-haired betas in the world," he added with a wink. After all, he himself had black hair and light green eyes.

Laughing, I shook my head slightly. "I'm pretty set in my feelings," I replied, smirking as I headed toward the exit.

I went back to the room where Soren was, staring at his laptop. When he saw me, he fixed his gaze on me, and for a moment, I saw anger and some sort of challenge in his eyes. At that moment, we were still alone; the other employees stayed in the break room.

Suddenly, Soren spoke, his voice full of bitterness, "I don't know why you're telling these people your sob story. If it were even true!"

I was stunned. "Everything I said was true, down to the last letter," I said slowly, choosing my words carefully.

"Really? Can you say that to my face?"

"Are you saying that because I said I love you? On what basis do you claim that's a lie? You're not inside my heart."

He squeezed his eyes shut and pursed his lips. When he opened them again, he seemed even angrier.

"You have the nerve to claim that I didn't want you? After I spent an entire month writing emails to you every fucking day, begging you to give me a chance? And you say that I rejected you, that I turned you down?!"

It felt like he had just thrown a bucket of ice-cold water from the Arctic right in my face.

"What the hell are you talking about? What emails? I never got anything from you! And believe me, I would've reacted! I would've flown to you on wings!"

A tense silence fell between us, but just then, we heard footsteps in the hallway as the other coworkers started returning, and we both had to go quiet, even though I was boiling with emotion inside.

What did he say? What fucking emails?

I opened my inbox and took a screenshot of all the emails I had received since graduation. Since there were a few from my brothers, I quickly labeled them in Paint with explanations like "brother, brother, cousin, dad, uncle," so he'd know they weren't from some new boyfriends of mine.

Then, I took a screenshot of my spam folder and sent both to Soren's work email.

I heard a faint sound from his phone. Soren picked it up and looked at the screen, studying the screenshots I had sent, covered in exclamation points, and I could see the tension on his face.

Then he turned back to his laptop and started typing something. Three minutes later, I received an email from him.

It showed a screenshot of his sent folder, and there were more than 30 emails—one for each day. Even though I could only see the subject lines, they were enough to tell me what kind of emails they were… I knew Soren had been asking me for a chance in them because many of those emails started with a pleading sentence.

Knowing that emotions would soon overwhelm me and feeling like my heart was about to leap out of my chest, I jumped up and ran out of the room. I couldn't control myself; a growl came out of my throat, and some beta who passed me in the hallway suddenly looked scared.

Deeply shaken, I didn't even know where to go. Eventually, I ended up in the restroom, but as soon as I stood in front of the mirror, staring at my flushed face, the door creaked open, and Soren walked in, his face just as red, just as shaken.

I got straight to the point. "How the hell is it possible that I didn't get any of those emails? Check if you got any bounce-backs, or maybe you sent them to the wrong email address!" I exploded, turning sharply to face him.

He reached out and handed me his phone. "Here, check for yourself."

I grabbed his phone and opened the sent folder. I checked the recipient, and it was my correct email address. I created a new message and emailed it to myself while Soren watched what I was doing.

I pulled out my phone and opened my inbox. But in doing so, I had to show him my screen saver, which was the photo of me and Soren that Josh had taken during our impromptu photo session on the hill. Soren's eyes widened when he saw it, but he probably forced himself not to comment on it, since we had much more pressing matters to attend to.

We both waited. I kept refreshing, but the message never appeared.

"Wait, but I got the email with the screenshot," I mumbled in surprise.

"I sent it from my work email as a 'reply-to'," Soren explained. "You sent your first email with the screenshot to my inbox at [email protected], not to my private email."

I let out a frustrated breath and refreshed the inbox again.

"You see? These emails aren't coming through. I just sent a test email, and nothing's there." My voice was shaky, my hands trembling, I could barely focus on the screen.

"How is this even possible? What day did you send the first email?" I wanted to know.

"In the morning, the day after our… last talk." Soren cleared his throat.

A thought formed in my mind. "Wait… What was the subject of that email? Was it something about penis enlargement?"

Soren bulged his eyes. "What? Why the hell would I send you an email about penis enlargement after what happened?!"

"Alvin was there. I was lying on the bed, and he told me I got an email about penis enlargement. My laptop was open, and he walked right over to it!"

"Alvin? What time was that?"

"I don't remember. It was almost three months ago! But… it must have been after I got back, so probably before noon, maybe 10:30 or 11:00."

"I sent my first email around that time. Look, here's the timestamp."

We checked the first email he sent, and sure enough, it was at 10:41.

"Could Alvin have deleted it? Damn it! Wait! He said he was going to set up a filter for me! Bastard!"

I quickly opened the filters tab, and there it was—one single custom filter named:

"Penis Enlargement."

Created on: 11:42.

"Damn it! The fucker! The scumbag!" I growled.

I turned to him, pressing my free hand against my forehead. "Soren, I never got those emails. I never read them!" I nearly shouted.

We both stood there, now silent, staring at each other. The air seemed to crackle with tension.

I felt like my heart was going to split in two. For more than 30 days, he had tried to reach out to me, pleading, begging me to come back, and he got… nothing in response?

In a trembling whisper, I asked, "Soren, did you really think I wouldn't reply to any of your emails? Did you really think I wouldn't come flying from the other side of the world if you just said, 'Let's try'? You can't be serious!"

Soren stayed silent. I could feel tears beginning to roll down my cheeks. Just like that time on campus, my legs buckled beneath me. I collapsed to my knees, pressing my hands to my face, feeling so overwhelmed, like a hundred-ton boulder had just been dropped on me.

"I'm gonna kill him. I swear I'll kill that bastard… This is all because of him!"

"I always wondered if he even told you that I was there twice, and he sent me away empty-handed… Did he?" Soren asked quietly.

"No! Not a single word!"

Soren stood still, staring at the wall. He seemed to be in some sort of stunned shock, completely frozen.

"I want to read these emails," I suddenly demanded in a firm, somber tone.

He let out a quiet scoff. "They don't matter anymore."

"What?! They do!" I nearly burst out, snatching his phone from his hand. He didn't even resist. Still on my knees, I began forwarding every single email to myself, one by one, just to be sure. I sent them to my backup email address.

He didn't stop me, standing motionless, staring toward the window, looking very pale.

"Those emails belong to me, and I'm going to read them all because you sent them to me," I stuttered, my voice shaky.

Soren remained silent, still as a statue, his eyes fixed on the window. When I finished forwarding the emails, I slowly stood up and handed his phone back to him.

Only then did he look at me, even paler than before.

"It… it doesn't matter anymore, Skye. That window that once existed—it's closed now. I made peace with you not wanting me, and I moved on. I'm with Liam now. It's too late. Too late…" His voice was faint, like he could barely breathe.

I felt so overwhelmed with emotions, I couldn't collect my thoughts. My throat constricted. I wanted to say something, to argue, to beg, but his face—looking like someone who'd just gone through a deep shock, unable to move—was reflected in my own silence. I couldn't find the words to respond.

Only when he turned to leave did I finally choke out, "I wasn't lying. I still love you, Soren."

He hesitated for a moment.

"As I said, that window is closed, Skye. I made a promise to Liam to try to build a relationship. He waited years for this chance. And I finally decided to give him that. It was three weeks ago. Don't you understand? I can't just break it, what kind of person would do that? It's too late, I'm sorry."

And… he walked out.

I stayed in the bathroom for another 15 minutes, feeling like I had gone from the slow-motion nightmare I had been living in to a nightmare on fast-forward, where everything was happening brutally fast, overwhelming my senses.

Almost swaying, feeling dizzy, I washed my face in the sink with cold water. Only after a few minutes was I able to return to the teamroom.

I sat down at my desk, feeling broken, defeated—maybe even more painfully than the first time. Were they all right? Should I never have taken this job?

My whole body trembled slightly. I stared at the screen, fighting the aching clench in my jaw.

I focused on the code, just to keep myself from thinking. Not now! The pain was too sharp.

Later, I'll think later…