CHAPTER 37

Kalli was so tiredof crying because of Dariux. The last twenty-four hours had been nothing but that. She had gone to her mother’s home yesterday, desperate for sanctuary after being unable to face her own parbot and her life decisions. She thought she was putting up a brave front, but of course, her mother had seen right through her thin facade. The hot cocoa and warm embraces she had provided had helped a little, but not enough.

After crying half the night away, she had woken up bleary-eyed and irritable. Only to find an urgent summons from ChronoSynthetics to appear at their headquarters within the hour. The temptation to ignore it was strong. She did not work for ChronoSynthetics, and therefore, they had no authority to summon her on such short notice.

But she knew they were behind the development of the time machine. They may need her presence for something important. Dariux was associated with them. The way her heart leapt at the prospect of seeing him again annoyed and depressed her, but she couldn’t suppress her traitorous organ’s reaction.

So she had washed away all evidence of tears, pulled her hair into a tight knot, and fixed her appearance to look as normal as possible. They had subjected her to scans and tests as soon as she had arrived. That was something she could have done without. She knew what they were measuring, and what the tests would show. She was an emotional mess at the moment and would have preferred to keep that to herself. Instead, a bloody report would expose all her feelings for anyone to read. But she had signed up for this mission, and that included tests upon return. So she endured them, and at last, she was escorted into the president’s office.

Only to find Dariux already ensconced there. Drink in hand, he was all cozy and chummy with the awful CEO of this soulless corporation, discussing her and her research. And in not very flattering terms.

What had she expected, anyway? His feelings on the subject were no secret to her. And yet, to be ambushed with his disdain had hurt. It took all she had in her to remain composed. Despite her heart bleeding inside her chest, she refused to give up this last shred of dignity.

“Good morning, gentlemen.” Her voice sounded almost alien to her own ears, so clear and calm, when she felt nothing like that.

Mr. Greer, the CEO, greeted her with artificial cordiality, offering his hand. The snake. She had no concrete reason to dislike the man, and yet he had always made her skin crawl. Only after acknowledging his greeting did she allow herself to turn her gaze towards Dariux. He was looking at her in a queer, intense way. Maybe he was ashamed of being caught talking about her behind her back. He should be.

He didn’t offer to shake her hand, and she was glad for the small mercy. She didn’t think she could withstand his touch just now. She would crumble.

The rest of the senseless meeting passed in a blur, with Mr. Greer carrying most of the conversation, and she just replying to the inanities when necessary. Dariux said little, preferring to sip his cognac and watch her. He looked... angry. About what? If anyone had the right to be angry, it was her.

It was time to end this. She had to get out of here before her emotions got the better of her.

“Well, if there’s nothing else, Mr. Greer, I need to take my leave now. I have another appointment. Thank you for inviting me to this meeting. It’s been... educational,” she said, standing up.

Both men stood as well.

“Of course, Dr. Brooks. It is I who thanks you for coming on such short notice. And for all your efforts regarding this mission.”

She inclined her head and turned to Dariux, experiencing a moment of anxiety. What should she call him? They were using last names and being formal but calling him ‘Mr. Kinkaid’ sounded unnatural. She had spent over a month living in close quarters with this man. They had relied on each other when hurt or sick. She had pretended to be Mrs. Kinkaid during the mission, and they had shared their bodies in exquisite intimacy... She couldn’t call him Mr. Kincaid and shake his hand as if he were a casual acquaintance.

In the end, he saved the moment by offering her a nod.

“Kalli.”

She could do a nod. “Goodbye, Dariux.”

“I’ll see you later,” he said in a low voice.

Not if she could help it.She had to get away from him as far and as fast as possible. It was a matter of self-preservation at this point. She smiled and took her leave, closing the door softly behind her. The walk to her vehicle took only a minute or two. But it could have been two hours for how long it felt.

At long last, she settled in the privacy of her car. Windows shut tight against the outside world.

“Take me to my mother’s house,” she instructed, and the car took off.

The tears overflowed her eyes swiftly. She didn’t even have time to sob. It was a strange way of crying. Without stuttering breaths and hiccups. Misery just poured out of her like an overflowing dam. She swiped at her cheeks, anger lending her much needed strength. Enough of this.

If Dariux didn’t want her, she didn’t want him either. He could stay with his damned parbot and frig himself on her artificial pussy until his cock fell off. Oh, damn. Don’t think about his cock. Or about him fucking that fake bitch.

The ride to her mother’s house was over before she had time to compose herself as much as she would have wanted. All too soon, her car stopped under the porticoed entrance of her childhood home.

Did Dariux know she had grown up on the grounds of the Avondale estate? Probably not. She had never mentioned it, and it was unlikely he had done any background research on her.

Her mother’s house was the original dower house of Crestview Hall. The charming residence was a seamless blend of old-world elegance with modern day comfort. In London, she had mourned that the classical facades were all that remained of the old buildings, the interiors ravaged by modern architecture until nothing remained of the original place.

But in this home, her mother had got the balance right. She had preserved the classic architecture, with its ivy-covered stone walls and the timeless slate roof. However, integrated into the facade and roof were energy-efficient solar panels, subtly capturing the sun’s rays to power the house’s advanced systems.

“Oh, hello, honeybee,” her mum greeted her from the doorway as she descended from the car and the vehicle took off to park itself in the garage. “You are back sooner than I had expected.”

“Hi, Mum. Yes, I concluded my business in the city fairly quickly.”

And thank God for that. She needed a holiday. A long, secluded holiday where she could disconnect from everyone. Where she couldn’t receive a summons, and work couldn’t find her.

“You look rather peaked, love. Come, let me make you a cuppa and you can tell me all about it.” In her usual fashion, Mum did not ask what ailed her. Her mother would simply envelop her in her warmth and correctly assume she would pour her heart out when she was ready.

Which she always did.

She sat in her favorite armchair by the fireplace and stretched her chilly hands towards the holographic fire. It looked so real. Even the warmth it emitted was in perfect proportion to the size of the fire. She had seen original fireplaces with actual fires recently. And this one looked and felt exactly the same. If she didn’t know it was fake, she wouldn’t be able to tell the difference. Kind of like parbots. She twisted her mouth. Even she had been fooled by the lifelike feel of parbots. How could she blame Dariux for preferring to ignore the admittedly minor drawbacks in favor of a comfortable and rewarding relationship?

At that moment, her mother returned with a tray laden with the tea service. She jumped to help her mum make space to set it up on the coffee table between the two chairs by the fire. It was their favorite spot.

As they prepared the tea in silence, the question that escaped her mouth surprised even her.

“Mum, do you still miss Dad?”

Her mother looked up from pouring the tea. She looked as surprised by the question as Kalli was about having asked it, but at least Mum didn’t look upset.

“Every day, my child. Why do you ask?”

“It’s just, sometimes I wonder... That is, I know we have already discussed this, and you have explained your reasons for not wanting a parbot. But in the years since... have you ever considered...”

“Getting one who resembles your father?” Her mum finished with uncanny accuracy when she kept mumbling, unable to complete the question.

“Well, yes. I know it’s not the same. But wouldn’t it ease your loneliness a bit? Make you feel like he is still here?”

Her mother sighed and leaned back in her chair. Her head cocked to one side in thought. “On the contrary, dear. I think it would make me miss him all the more.”

“How?” Kalli leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees, holding the cup in her hands.

“You think the differences would be small, and the similarities would overshadow them. But that is not the case. Even with all the technological advances, there’s no parbot capable of mimicking a human being to perfection.”

“You think so? I was just looking into the fire and noticing how similar it was to an actual fire. Did you know that, before this mission, I had never seen a fireplace with a real fire? But now, after a month of seeing nothing but real fires, and gazing upon this one, I realize they look the same. I can’t tell them apart.”

“Ah! But a fire is a simple thing to recreate. Same as the paintings.” Her mom pointed out the classic oil paintings adorning the walls. As she looked, two of them changed to a different image. One stayed the same.

“Yes, and that is my point. If I didn’t know these two frames were digital, and that one was an original oil painting, I wouldn’t be able to tell. Do you think the same can happen with human beings?”

“No. Human beings are a million times more complex than a fire, or an oil painting, or even the most advanced machine. We have idiosyncrasies and a certain type of originality. And yes, I know all of those can be programmed into parbots, but they never seem real.”

“Why do you think that is?”

Her mother gazed into the fire and took some time to answer. “I guess it is because we are unpredictable. We have unique thoughts and unexpected reactions. We have defects. And yes, sometimes that is irritating, and we clash. But we are also capable of forgiveness, compassion, and love. And that is the beauty of it.”

Kalli nodded her agreement. “Why do you think so many people prefer parbots then?”

Her mother shrugged. “Part of human imperfection, I think. They are the shiny new object.”

“Hardly new. They have been around for twenty years now. And every day they seem to become more sophisticated and gain more popularity.”

“In the grand scheme of things, twenty years is nothing. I think humans will eventually tire of parbots.”

“You think? I see no evidence of that. On the contrary. People seem to prefer them more and more with each passing day. I think they are here to stay.”

Her mother shrugged. “It’s just a hunch. Maybe they will coexist with humans. But I hope they never completely replace human relationships.”

“But that is what they are doing it. And they could bring humanity to the brink of extinction. Our interaction with them is effecting changes in us that makes us... less human.”

“Aw, child. I doubt it will come to that. But why this talk about parbots and humans now? Are you having second thoughts about Martin? Have you fallen in love with a human?”

Leave it to her mum to cut right to the core. She took a deep breath before replying. “Yes, and... I think so.”

“Oh, darling.” Her mum’s eyes were full of empathy and compassion as they gazed upon her. “And I surmise all is not going smoothly in the human love department?”

At that, a sarcastic scoff escaped her throat. “You could say that. Or maybe, it would be more accurate to say, the human love is entirely one-sided.”

“How do you know that?”

“He has a parbot. And he doesn’t believe in human relationships or love.”

“Forgive me for prying, but have you two been... intimately involved?”

Heat climbed to her face at her mum’s incisive question, but her mother had never been one to mince words, so she responded with equal frankness.

“Yes.”

“In that case, there must be some feelings on his part. It is not entirely one-sided.”

“Perhaps. But lust is not the same as love.”

“No. But love can grow from lust. What is the first thing that attracted you to him?”

Kalli’s smile was rueful. “Touche. Yes, the attraction was physical at first. But it isn’t only that. He is brilliant, and so self-assured. Be it dancing, fighting or engineering and operating complex technology, he does everything well. He appears to be tough and unfeeling, but he is capable of great kindness. Once, he rescued a puppy from a freezing river. And he took care of me when I got sick. He is so complex. I don’t understand him sometimes, and he infuriates me, but I lo—”

She cut herself off, unwilling or unable to articulate out loud what she had not even admitted to herself.

Of course, she didn’t need to say it for her mum to perceive it. Kalli had already said too much, but the need to talk about him was overpowering. She missed him so much already. She missed his presence, his voice, even his scolding. But most of all, she missed his lovemaking. Oh, how she missed that! It wasn’t even his prowess, although that was impressive. It was the intensity with which he looked at her, touched her, gave himself completely to the moment. As if what they were sharing was everything. She closed her eyes, remembering.

“Tell me, is he the chap who accompanied you on this mission?” Her mum’s voice snagged at her fantasy.

Kalli’s eyes snapped open at that. “How did you know?”

Her mum smiled. “Oh, darling. Just three days ago, before you left on this mission, you were content with your life. Now you are moping and can’t even go home to your parbot. The reason is not hard to surmise.”

“It was six weeks for me,” she muttered.

“You are right. It is difficult to wrap my head around the concept of time traveling. So you spent six weeks in this man’s company. Doing everything together. Relying on each other. Being each other’s only partners in a strange world. It is no wonder feelings have sprouted.”

“Not in him.”

“Again, how do you know? Maybe he just needs a bit more time to come to terms with his feelings. Men are usually slower when it comes to emotions.”

“Today, when I walked into the ChronoSynthetics president’s office, he was already there, talking to the man. And I overheard him saying how he didn’t agree with my research and denying our relationship in the coldest of tones.”

“I’m sorry, honeybee. That must have been tough to hear. But you mustn’t despair. Maybe he didn’t mean it like that. Or he was saying it for the president’s benefit.”

“No, he has said the same thing on multiple occasions.”

“Give him time,” her mum repeated, reaching out to hold her hand. “Maybe he just needs to come to terms with his feelings. And give yourself time as well. You might get some clarity and perspective by stepping away from it all. You know you are welcome to stay here with me for as long as you want.”

“Yes, I know, Mum. I might do just that. I think I will take a leave from work and do a retreat.”

Her mother’s smile was brilliant. “Sounds like a capital idea to me!”

She didn’t know if her feelings would change, or if she would gain any clarity. But one thing was certain.

She needed to stay away from Dariux.