5. Sam

Chapter 5

Sam

PRESENT DAY

“ Y ou had a helluva fucking game, Hartley.” Bryce Maxwell, the star quarterback for the Oakland Saints, claps me on the back as we run through the tunnel at Allegiant Stadium after we just clinched the number one seed in the National Football Conference, beating the Tennessee Raptors 42 to 22. “I think you might be the first tight end in the past fifty-seven years who’s on track to win the MVP.”

I stop short and pull off my helmet. “Are you fucking crazy, Maxwell? You can’t go around saying shit like that. The playoffs haven’t even started yet. How the hell can you even think about the Super Bowl right now?”

“Yeah, well, we won by twenty today. And the Super Bowl ain’t a pipe dream, that’s for sure.” Bryce chuckles. “I’ve got good reason to be cocky. Tennessee choked on us today, and they will be in very good company. Trust me. I’ve got three rings to prove I know what I’m talking about. We’re a shoo-in for the Super Bowl. My goal is five rings before I retire, and you’re gonna help me get the rest.”

Aaron Waller, one of the wide receivers, collides with my other side. “Is Maxwell talking smack again about Tennessee?” He reaches around me and pokes Bryce. “Did you take a big hit to the head? You’re gonna jinx us, man.”

“Today was our day, and I’m confident about the postseason. Sue me.”

Aaron shakes his head at me. “He’s kinda right about today. The Raptors couldn’t make a single pass without us intercepting. And you were in the end zone more today than you have been the whole season.”

I roll my eyes. “Only because I’m picking up the slack for you.”

“Ah ha,” Aaron gives me a punch in the arm. “Seems like someone else is a little cocky, too. Were you showing off for someone out there?”

Bringing a hand to the back of my neck, I look away and shrug. “Just doing my job. And half the time I’m covering your ass.”

“Don’t cover me too much, brah. The afterparty is gonna be my time to shine.” He waggles his eyebrows at me.

As the only other “out” player on the Saints, Aaron and I can joke in private like that. It’s hard to be one of so few gay players in the NFL, but over the past couple of years, we’ve built a small network of guys we can trust and confide in when things get dicey. It’s good to know there are others who have our backs because not everyone is tolerant of our sexuality. And players we know have had it pretty damn rough, like Bryce’s brother, Jase Maxwell, tight end on the Cincinnati Crusaders.

We trudge into the locker room and collapse on a bench. My body aches from head to toe and I want to stand under the steaming shower spray until every crick, knot, and pull is effectively soothed.

“You got any big plans tonight?” Aaron asks .

A weird tingly feeling erupts in my gut. “Yeah, my brother and I are going to see Sin City tonight at the Sun Arena with a few guys.”

“Fuck me,” Aaron breathes. “Brixton Scott is the hottest rock star on the planet. I’d bend over in a hot second for him.”

I force a laugh.

The night we met in that hospital chapel started out as the worst one of my life. But then God gave my family the miracle we’d been praying for. And Brixton’s brother came through, too, from what he’d said.

That has to mean something. Even in the depths of despair, I felt something in that chapel, a fierce spark that ignited in the darkness of my heart.

At that point, I thought he was sent there by some unknown power to comfort me, help me come to terms with what I was sure was about to happen. But thinking back, I believe it was a glimpse of what was to come when the timing was right.

He’s never publicly come out but there have been rumors floating around about his sexuality for years. I’ve never seen him photographed with another guy, either. But I know what I felt. And the look that flickered in his eyes is burned into my memory.

He felt it, too.

A tiny shudder ripples through me.

Tonight could be it.

So when Bryce told me his cousin Lane, the drummer for the band, had given him tickets for the VIP suite for the concert, I thought maybe we really were destined to meet again. It’s been two years and I’ve thought about him...and that night…a lot.

If I’m being honest, I’ve done a hell of a lot more than think. I’ve watched his interviews, flipped through his pictures, seen his YouTube videos, all the while fantasizing about what could have been.

Chase will be with us tonight at the show. Sin City is his favorite rock band and he’s been talking about it nonstop since Bryce invited us. Our worlds are going to collide again tonight and I’m hoping that this time, they won’t just part ways after the concert ends.

“My brother is a big fan. He’s been climbing the walls all week waiting for tonight.”

“Speaking of climbing, I’d happily spend a lifetime climbing Brixton Scott.” Aaron snickers and stretches his arms overhead before standing up.

He wanders over to a set of lockers, leaving me alone with the thoughts that have been looping through my mind over the past week. I never told anyone other than Chase that I met Brixton. It seemed too private, too intimate.

Not even Bryce knows.

I could have probably reached out to Brixton afterward since Bryce’s cousin is his bandmate. I’m sure he could have made some arrangement for me to get in touch. But then I’d have had to tell Bryce how I knew Brixton. It just made me feel weird to tell anyone else about the experience.

The other thing that gnaws at my gut is that he could have gotten in touch, too.

But he didn’t.

Then again, Sin City took off like a shot right about that time. I’m sure he’s been focused on plenty of more important things.

And since I definitely didn’t want to be seen as some desperate groupie clamoring for his attention, I left things alone. Kept the past in the past.

But tonight…who knows?

Maybe that feeling will come rushing back .

Or maybe it was just the overabundance of emotion of the night that amplified the spark between us two years ago.

Coach Hayes claps his hands to get our attention. “Nice work out there, guys. But we still have a long road ahead of us. Playoffs start next week and even though we got the bye, we need to keep our heads in the game. This isn’t the time to take a breather.”

He runs through some of the plays where we fell short, but because Tennessee wasn’t on their game, our missteps didn’t hurt us.

“This game is all about teamwork. We win together, we lose together. We do whatever needs to be done to succeed.” With a nod at me, he says, “Take Hartley here. You scored three touchdowns today. That’s not the typical job of his position, but he had the opportunities and he took them. We beat Tennessee today because they lost their focus. We ran circles around them because they didn’t work together and it cost them a chance to make the playoffs.”

Coach goes on for a few more minutes and with each one that ticks past, my body becomes more and more stiff. I can practically feel the scalding water sizzling my skin.

When he finally walks out of the locker room, Bryce walks over. “Let’s meet at the arena around seven tonight. I’ll text you the ticket codes.”

“Okay, sounds good.”

Bryce pushes back the hair spilling into his eyes. “I’m kinda surprised they’re playing tonight. Especially at that arena.”

My brows furrow. “What do you mean?”

Bryce’s lips pull together into a tight line and he steps closer to me. “Look, I know Chase is looking forward to meeting him tonight but I don’t think that’s going to happen. Two years ago, Brixton’s brother died in a bad car accident. It was right after a show the band did at the Sun Arena. ”

My throat tightens, swelling around the massive lump now lodged there. “He…died?” I manage to croak out after a few seconds.

“Yeah, he’s a pretty private person and didn’t want anyone outside of the band and his immediate family to know. There was nothing in the press or anything like that. Because Lane’s our cousin, we found out. But his family kept everything really small to keep the press away.”

Bryce shakes his head. “It was bad. And he’s been kind of a mess ever since then. Tonight is the anniversary of his brother’s death and supposedly, he’s not in great shape. My cousin said he's been MIA and they haven’t been able to find him. He does this sometimes, though, so they think he’ll show up at the arena. I just wouldn’t count on a meet and greet after the show.”

I watch Bryce walk toward the showers, my jaw still sore after hitting the floor when I heard the news.

Brixton’s brother died.

And Chase survived.

Never in a million years would I have expected that kind of a collision of fates.

What the heck are the odds?