10. Brixton

Chapter 10

Brixton

S am grabs Rex’s phone. “They think we’re…” His eyes practically bulge out of his sockets. “Together?”

A snide laugh escapes my lips.

As fucking if .

Saint Sam could never handle the devil inside of me.

“You think this is funny?” he says, shooting a glare in my direction.

“It’s just stupid speculation,” I say. “People idiotically assume because you’re pulling me away from Mr. Clean that we’re a thing.”

And that’s when my stomach does a dip.

A thing.

Oh, shit. That must mean…

“Looks like the rumors are confirmed. Brixton Scott is gay,” Ben reads out loud, stroking his goatee.

I lift an eyebrow at Sam. “Did you just out me?”

A surprised look shadows his expression and then passes just as fast. He narrows his eyes. “Oh, so I’m getting blamed for that, too? ”

“You should’ve left well enough alone,” I seethe, leaning toward him. “I didn’t ask for your help.”

“If I didn’t get you away from there, Christ only knows what those cameras would have picked up. I saved you. You should be thanking me, you ungrateful asswipe.”

I hold his strained gaze for a long minute. “I wouldn’t hold my breath for that one.”

Sam’s fists clench tight on the seat next to him. “I should have let you tear the guy’s head off. Then you’d be sitting in a jail cell right now for murder.”

“The angel and his demon.” Ben shakes his head and lets out a deep sigh. “Jesus, there are already memes. We’re already too damn late.”

Sam scrubs a hand down the front of his face then slams his hand against the seat.

“What do you look so frustrated about?” I ask. “I’m the one who beat the hell out of the guy. I’m the one who’ll take all the heat.”

“You don’t get it, do you?” The vein in Sam’s forehead pulses. “If people think we’re together, I’m part of your whole…bad boy rocker rampage. People will think I accept your shitty behavior and attitude, that I’m okay with you being a total douchebag.”

I hold a hand to my heart and let out a gasp of mock horror. “Oh no. So you’d be a bad boy too, then? What will all of your fans think? Will they cancel you because you’re associated with me?” With a roll of my eyes, I continue tapping my fingers against the seat, the pace in time with the throbbing of my pulse. “There are bigger problems here than your precious reputation, Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes.”

“Unlike you,” Sam says, his eyes flashing with anger. “I try to be a good role model for my fans and the kids I volunteer for. I’m smart enough to realize that without them, I’d be nothing. And I actually care about keeping their respect.” He moves closer so that our heads practically touch. “You don’t give a damn about holding onto anyone’s respect because you clearly have none for yourself.”

“So now you’re trying to psychoanalyze me?” I snarl. “I thought we put that shit to bed once and for all.”

“Guys, enough. None of this is going to help fix this.” Ben rubs his temples. “We need to do some serious damage control. This will impact both of you, like it or not. And we need to spin it fast before it gets out of our control and it’s veering that way now. It’s not just the label and the band on the hook. Sam is involved, even if he didn’t throw a single punch. Perception always becomes reality. And if people think you really are together, it’ll cast a shadow over him, too.”

“I’m sure the league will have something to say about it, too. There’s a strict code of conduct and I’d be guilty by association. It’ll bring heat onto the team, too.” Sam rakes a hand through his hair. “I should’ve gone home after the damn show,” he mutters. The he raises his dark eyes to mine. “Except I didn’t want to disappoint my brother. Your biggest fan. All he wanted to do was get a chance to meet you. I didn’t realize everything I’d be sacrificing to do something good for him. And for you, ingrate.”

That was like a donkey kick to the nuts. I wrap my fingers into tight fists. “Well, I don’t want to meet him anyway,” I say, the stress knot at the base of my skull sending a sharp pain straight down my spine.

“I don’t think that’ll be a problem once he finds out what a jerkoff you really are.” Sam lets out a disbelieving laugh. “How are you the same guy?” he mumbles to himself. “And how the hell did I let myself get taken by him?”

I blink fast. Rex and Ben don’t show any signs of hearing what Sam just said but I heard every word, whether he wanted me to or not.

“The guy is being taken to the hospital,” Rex suddenly says, his forehead pinched. “He’s not in great shape.”

I tap my fingers on the seat, blowing out a breath. “So now what?”

Ben’s lips pull tight. “You’re going to make a formal apology to the guy, once he’s cleared at the hospital.”

“It’s bullshit. He started the whole thing.”

“You sound like an obstinate child.” Sam grimaces. “I can’t believe I tried to help you. You’re so far beyond anyone’s help.”

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Ben’s eyebrows furrow. My gut knots in response.

He’s one of the very few who knows just how true those words are.

Ben slowly turns his head toward me. “I think I may have an idea.”

“Am I gonna like this idea?”

“Probably not, but it’s a great way to clear you both. Tonight.”

My gaze slowly slides back to Sam. It doesn’t look like he was paying the slightest bit of attention to Ben right then. He stares out the tinted window, his chiseled jaw tensing harder with each second that ticks past. It’s obvious he’s regretting his choice to save me. I squelch any shreds of remorse. He put himself in the middle of my disaster. I didn’t ask him to jump in.

Shifting in the seat, I grit my teeth as the guilt tugs at my brain.

I didn’t ask for Sam’s help but he gave it because that’s the kind of guy he is. And I liked that guy. A lot. I wanted to get to know that guy, even though our timing was grossly off .

He wanted to get to know me, too. He admitted it a few seconds ago.

And that knowledge generates a sudden and inexplicable urge to run my hand down the side of his taut face, to drag the tips over his beard, to run my fingers through his thick, dark waves.

I grab the sides of my head like I have the power to block out the X-rated thoughts now looping through my mind. What the hell is wrong with me? Today was a total shit show — from my visit with Allie and Jules to my dumbass idea of going suicide surfing at Half-Moon Bay. Ever since I read that letter, throughout the entire concert, all I could think about was the fact that my brother’s heart is still beating inside of someone else, that a part of him is still alive and not with me, but with fucking Sam Hartley, the guy who got to keep his brother.

A fierce and completely unwarranted hatred ignited when I read his brother’s name at the bottom of that letter. Jealousy surged deep inside of me, seeping into all the deep cracks in my heart left by Davis’s death.

When Sam cornered me by the restroom after the show, making my mind and my body fly into battle over him, shit just snapped. With my vision flooded with red, anyone could have been a target. Unfortunately for him, Mr. Clean was the first unlucky son of a bitch to get on my war path.

But at this minute, the hatred simmers, and pure animal lust is gaining power over my mind. It doesn’t care about why I’m so focused on despising him. It only cares about the sensations coursing through it, what it would very much like to do to the guy who pulled me out of my dark rabbit hole before I really went completely postal. What happened back at that bar was nothing compared to what might have been if it hadn’t been for Sam.

Not that I’d ever admit that to him .

“Okay, we’re heading to Mercy Hospital. And we’re going to hope and pray that the guy is conscious when we get there.”

An icy hand grabs my heart and squeezes as my mind trips back to the night of the accident.

That’s the same hospital where Davis died. Where his beating heart was taken out of his body and put in another.

My throat tightens, a sharp pain shooting down my left arm. Electricity flows into my fingertips, heart hammering hard against my ribcage.

I gulp down air, gripping the seat until my knuckles turn white.

I can’t go back there. I can’t go through that horrific night again, can’t?—

Ben turns to me and Sam. “The press will be camped out there waiting for a status on the guy.”

He and Rex exchange a quick knowing glance. Rex gives his head a slight nod, choking my next thought.

“And so will you…as a newly public couple. Get ready to put on the act of your lives.”