14. Paige

14

PAIGE

A s soon as the council room clears, the weight of what just happened starts to settle in my chest. I can feel the tension radiating from Aries beside me, his thoughts clearly tangled in battle strategies and the heavy burden of leadership. I don't blame him—my mind is whirling too, grappling with everything we've just discussed. The orcs are coming, and if we're not ready, it won't just be our lives on the line—it'll be the future of this entire kingdom.

I glance at Aries, who's still staring at the door, his brow furrowed. I reach out and touch his arm, my fingers curling around his biceps, and he turns to me, the worry in his eyes making my heart ache.

"Hey," I say softly, waiting until his gaze meets mine. "We're going to get through this."

He gives me a tight smile, but it doesn't reach his eyes. "We have to," he replies, his voice low and full of tension. "There's too much riding on this."

I can hear the weight in his words, the responsibility that's crushing him, and I wish I could lift it, even just a little.

"I hope I didn't overstep," I say. "With Thorne, I mean."

"Are you kidding?" The ghost of a smile blooms on his face. "That was worth allowing him into the meeting in the first place."

I smile, but it's short-lived as I take in the haggard lines and dark circles that mark his lack of sleep. He's been gone long into the night these last few days—longer than me even.

I still haven't had a chance to tell him the full extent of my magic's capabilities—a discovery that's finally come after grueling hours of practice and stubborn determination.

"What was that between you and Leo?" he asks, breaking into my thoughts. "It looked as if you were having some silent conversation."

"He found me in the gardens a few days ago," I say. "Right after we returned from seeing that village destroyed. He helped me find strength and hope."

"Whatever he said to you, I'm glad for it, then." He brushes my cheek, his eyes intent on mine though I can sense his distraction. His restlessness.

The battle plan has been decided. And it's as if Aries is already gone, marching to war, though his body remains before me.

"You should get some rest," I tell him gently.

His expression hardens, and I can see the argument in his eyes already.

But then, an idea takes root in my mind, one that's been nagging at me since we first talked about the orcs and Constantine.

"Before you do, I've been thinking," I begin cautiously, "about another way I can help."

His brow furrows again, but there's curiosity there too. "What do you mean?"

I take a deep breath, knowing this is a gamble. But if it works, it could be the answer to all of this. "I think I need to go back. To the library."

The change in him is immediate. Aries stiffens, his eyes narrowing as he shakes his head, but I press on before he can shut me down completely.

"Just hear me out," I say quickly. "Constantine is too confident, Aries. He's got something up his sleeve, and I think it's another way into this world. Another book, another portal—something. If I can get back into the library and find it, I can take it from him. Cut off his access to Astronia, and then we'll be safe. The orcs will still be a problem, but at least we won't have to worry about him sneaking in and out whenever he wants."

"No." His voice is sharp, final. He pulls back slightly, putting space between us, and the coldness of it makes my chest tighten. "It's too dangerous, Paige. I won't let you risk it."

"Think about it," I argue, my frustration rising. "If Constantine has another way in, it doesn't matter how well we fight the orcs—he'll find a way to undermine us, to make everything we do meaningless. We have to stop him at the source."

"No," he repeats, more forcefully this time. "You don't understand. Going back to the library means walking straight into his trap. He's probably waiting for you, hoping you'll do exactly this. And if he catches you?—"

"He won't catch me," I insist, my voice rising. "I know that place better than anyone. I can get in and out before he even knows I'm there. Aries, this is our best shot."

He stares at me, his expression hardening into something that feels like stone. "I said no, Paige. I won't lose you to him, especially for something so reckless."

"You think I'm just going to waltz in there without a plan? I'm trying to save us, Aries. Save you ."

"You're not saving anyone if you get yourself killed," he snaps back. "Or worse, captured. I can't—" He stops himself, taking a breath as if he's trying to rein in his emotions. "I can't let you do this, Paige. It's not just your life on the line. It's mine too. The kingdom's. If you're gone, if Constantine gets his hands on you, we're finished."

The air between us feels heavy, charged with everything we're not saying. I take a step back, my chest tightening with the realization that this is a wall I'm not going to break through. Not now, at least.

"So that's it?" I say, my voice quieter now, but no less tense. "You're just going to shut me down? Not even consider it?"

He looks at me, and for a moment, I see the struggle in his eyes, the conflict between what he wants and what he thinks is right. But then he shakes his head, and his exhaustion deepens to something that goes beyond lack of sleep.

"I'm not trying to control you, Paige. And this isn't…I don't get to decide anything for you. Your choices are your own. I'm saying no because I want to do this together like we promised—but not because of that promise. Because we're better that way. As a team. And the fact is I can't get behind a mission like that right now. Not before the battle with the horde."

By the time he's done talking, I can see the fear and worry right there at the surface, and my frustration lessens just a little bit. I know how he feels. The idea of losing him is just… exactly why I want to do this.

"All right," I say, the word clipped.

Waiting might be the more cautious choice, but it doesn't ease the urgency and drive inside me to do something. I turn away from him, my heart pounding in my chest, and start toward the door.

"Paige, wait—" he begins, but I don't stop. I can't. Not when everything inside me feels like it's unraveling.

"It's fine," I say over my shoulder, my voice tight. He starts to respond, but I cut him off. "We have a battle to prepare for. Let's focus on that."

And then I'm out the door, a knot of frustration and fear tightening in my chest. I know he's trying to protect me, but all I can feel right now is the sting of inaction.

As I make my way down the corridor, I can't help but wonder if facing the horde will be enough or if Constantine has something much more terrible waiting for us on that battlefield than an army of orcs with guns.

What should be half a day's ride to Misthaven is a two-day march. Considering all the men and supplies in our convoy, Aries says we're making good time, but I can't help the impatience at our slow pace. Anything could happen in two days. The orcs could speed up. Fix their carts. Beat us there and destroy the place before the evacuations are complete. But there's nothing we can do to go any faster.

So we march.

Aries is distant.

Even at night, when we spread our bedrolls out under the stars, he and Leo wait until the camp is settled before leaving for a recon flight with a couple of raven shifters. Even though I know it's for good reason, his absence stings.

We've barely spoken since we left the castle. He's angry at me, I can tell. Maybe even scared. I don't blame him; there's so much at stake for us. But I'm not going to apologize when there's so much riding on this.

Eventually, I drift off alone beneath our blankets.

During the night, I stir when Aries returns and lies down beside me, but in the morning when I wake again, he's already gone. While Aries and Leo lead the march, I fall back and walk with Blossom and Mag instead.

"Hey," Blossom calls.

"Hey," I return, unable to stifle the sigh that follows.

They share a look, and Mag says something about checking in with Aries. Then he's gone, jogging toward the front with the princes and leaving us alone.

"Subtle," I say.

Blossom smirks. "Mag has never been accused of that in his life."

"Fair point," I say.

We walk in silence before Blossom speaks up. "So, do you want to talk about it?"

"Talk about what?"

She rolls her eyes. "Did you really come back here to hide from your man and pretend nothing is wrong?"

"I'm not hiding," I protest. But at her withering look, I groan. "Fine. I'm taking some space. Not hiding."

She shakes her head. "You know he's just stressed, right?"

I bite back the retort that bubbles up. Mostly because the soldiers marching around us are ignoring us pointedly—which means they're all listening in to this entire exchange.

My pace slows, and I steer Blossom out of line where we veer farther off from the rest of the men.

"I want to try to make a portal," I say quietly when we're out of earshot.

"A portal to where?" Blossom asks.

"The library."

She stops walking and pulls me around to face her. "Now?"

"Chill," I say, tugging on her until we're both marching forward again.

"Why in the hell would you want to do that—especially right now?" she hisses.

"Because Constantine is feeding off this world, which means he already has another way in. Even if we stop the orcs, Astronia is dying."

"How exactly do you plan to fight him and the orcs?"

"I don't want to fight him," I say. "He won't even know I'm there. I just need to sneak in long enough to find the source of his portal to this world and steal it."

"Paige, that place is crawling with creatures, remember? There is no sneaking in."

I huff. "Whose side are you on?"

"The side of you not getting killed."

"Says the girl currently marching with me into an orc battle."

"Look, I want to save the library just as much as you do. Hell, I get what's at stake if we don't. But we need to be smart. Constantine had years to plan his takeover. We've had days. Aries just wants you both to make it through this to the other side. I can't blame him for being cautious. I would say the same thing if it were Mag."

Her gaze travels the length of the line of men to where Mag walks along beside Aries and Leo. I don't miss the way her expression softens at the sight of him. Mostly because Blossom never used to soften for anyone.

"You really love him, huh?" I ask.

"Don't be ridiculous." She scoffs, but it's so fake I roll my eyes.

"Okay, now who's lying," I say, hip-bumping her.

She snickers, but when she doesn't answer me, I know better than to press it.

We march along in silence for several minutes. Around us, the men talk and laugh. It's hard to imagine we're marching to a bloody battle with the sun shining and spirits so high. Or it would be if I couldn't feel my mate's struggle through our bond. The weight of all he's carrying pressing down around him.

From here, I see Aries doing his best to appear unconcerned despite the swirling of fear inside him. Blossom is right. He's just looking out for me, and I can't fault him for it. I just hope we aren't making a mistake by ignoring the threat Constantine poses.

Beside me, Blossom clears her throat. When she speaks, her words are so quiet I almost miss them entirely. "You know…. dragons aren't the only shifters to have fated mates."

I stop short, gaping at her. "Wait. Do you mean…"

"Mag is my mate, yes."

Her words strike me speechless.

This time, she's the one to tug me along. I let her, still reeling at her confession. If Mag is her mate, that means… all these years, she's known it and done nothing about it.

"Why did you fight it for so long?" I ask.

"Because I didn't want him to be my mate," she says, frustration leaking into her voice. "You know Mag. You knew how he acted, how he would flirt with everyone. Every skirt that walked into the library, he would sidle right up to her."

"But did he know?"

Blossom laughs, but there's more pain than humor in the sound. "No."

My heart pangs at the way she's clearly kept herself so closed off for so long. "He's different when he talks about you, Blossom. He might joke around and flirt with others, but it was only ever to get your attention. To get under your skin. He loves you."

"I think it's taken me a while to believe that," she says. "A long while."

"I knew you were stubborn, but this is just ridiculous," I tease.

She shoves me lightly, laughing as her eyes light up. "I just realized something."

"What is it?"

"Out of all the criminals across all the worlds, the library chose Mag and me as its Keepers. Almost like it wanted us to find each other. And you… Out of all the books you could have accidentally opened, it was this one. It was Aries."

My eyes widen as I realize her point. "Holy shit. Athenaeum is a matchmaker."

Blossom and I share a look, and then we both start laughing.

"Wait until Mag and Aries hear this," I tell her.

"Whoa." She grips my arm, her smile vanishing. "I haven't told him."

"You haven't told him you two are mates?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"I was going to after he was injured in the cavern, but then Constantine showed up, and it was just chaos."

"But we've been here for days now," I say.

"Preparing for war." She shakes her head, all traces of humor gone. "If I don't make it… It would be better this way, for him not to know."

"You should tell him that you love him at the very least," I say. "Before the battle."

She shakes her head. "In case I die?—"

"You won't!"

"Paige, it's my choice.

I sigh. She's right. "Fine. But you're telling him after. Promise me. You deserve happiness, Blossom. You both do. Promise me you'll tell him the truth and live happily ever after together."

"I'm not one of your romance novels, you know," she says darkly.

"Oh, you're way more badass than those romance heroines." I lower my voice to a whisper before adding, "Besides, I've had mate sex, and it's honestly so much better than the books let on."