Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Brooklyn

I 'm pretty sure I'm failing at everything. Somehow, I forgot how exhausting pregnancy was the first time around. Maybe it's worse this time because my kid gives zero fucks how tired I am.

I love Libby with my whole heart, but I'm pretty sure kids are all raging narcissists. She just has no idea how much energy she has, and the world is still wildly exciting for her.

It doesn't help that it feels like I've got the weight of the world sitting on my shoulders.

For being almost seven months pregnant, I'm genuinely shocked I've been able to hold on to the secret for this long.

It's because I've got a long torso.

Baggy, shapeless clothing has become my new best friend. But even that has limits of how long it can last.

Libby's dad is going to shit a golden brick when he figures it out. He'll immediately want to know if the baby is a boy.

And if it is, he'll take him from me.

Either way, it's going to get ugly.

I can feel it.

Thank God I didn't hook up with Maverick and Gunner all those months ago. If I had, I probably would have assumed the baby was theirs. That night, I had no idea I was already a month pregnant.

That would have been a mortifying situation.

Then there's the major crap happening with my ex's family.

I'm almost certain he has guys watching me all the time, but not one of them stepped in to save our freaking child.

Well, unless the motorcycle guy was one of Avan's men, but I doubt that.

God, it's really hard not to beat myself up over my poor life choices.

My head rests against the steering wheel as I mentally prepare myself to climb out of the car.

Libby fell asleep in her car seat with that damn orange tucked under her arm. It's late for a nap, and if history is a good indicator, she's going to wake up cranky.

My head aches as I rub my sore eyes.

I'm freaking exhausted, and no matter how hard I try to keep going, problems are piling up faster than I can tackle them.

I stare at my phone, willing it to vibrate with an incoming text or call. "Dammit, Lennox," I mutter, hating that my little sister is making me worry. Again.

Lennox moved in with me after she graduated from high school. Not that I can blame her for wanting out of our childhood home. Still, I was hesitant because of everything I've got going on in my own life.

She didn't have anywhere else to go, and the rest is history. Only, she hasn't called or shown her face in three days.

Though I haven't reached the it's time to freak out stage, it's quickly approaching.

She's young, with no responsibilities. On occasion, she sleeps over at a friend's house or stays with a coworker. But she could respond to my texts, at the very least.

It's a difficult balancing act.

I'm her sister, not her mom.

And on top of all of that, I've made my own mistakes in life. It would be hypocritical to say anything about the way she chooses to live hers.

That doesn't stop me from worrying about her, especially since I know Lennox has a crush on one of my ex's security guys. I've practically turned blue in the face warning her away from him.

I get it.

I was young and stupid too.

It's so hard to believe I was just like her four short years ago.

That's how I ended up involved with Avan in the first place.

I had a full-ride scholarship, which I worked my ass off to achieve.

All that went to shit when I got pregnant with Libby my freshman year.

It was a learning experience.

I thought I took that lesson to heart, but here I am all over again. Except, this time, I'm not only terrified to tell Avan; I know, from experience, exactly how ruthless he can be.

I'm not the same naive girl I was when I told him about my pregnancy with Libby.

Back then, I thought he'd be excited… At the very least, I delusionally hoped he would be.

I know better now.

It's ridiculous that I'm even pregnant. Liberty was conceived during a heat, but not this time. I didn't even know omegas could get pregnant outside of a heat until it was too late.

I spent a lot of time trying to decide whether to have the baby, but already having Libby made it harder, in a sense.

I knew that cluster of cells would grow into a baby.

My baby.

Omegas are known for loving kids and wanting big families. I'd say my instincts were in complete control, because no matter how much I tried to talk myself into having an abortion, I couldn't go through with it.

It's all fun and games until the stick has two lines.

Libby managed to sleep through me carrying her in, which is rare, but she's conked out on the couch when someone knocks on the front door. I grimace, shoving myself out of the recliner while trying to keep from waking her.

After the horrible trip to the grocery store, I decided tonight was not the night to cook.

I already know I'm not winning any mother-of-the-year awards, so I ordered chicken fingers and fries from the diner down the street. They have free delivery from seven to nine on weeknights, and it's one of our favorite places.

My hand wraps around the handle, and I tug the door open without even checking the peephole.

My jaw falls when I spot Dustin, Avan's younger brother. He's even creepier than his sibling, and my stomach drops as he tugs me out the door.

I changed into a pajama dress as soon as I got home, and it's nothing like the bulky, loose clothing I've been wearing in public. My hands fly to my stomach in an attempt to cover it, but in this tight-fitting dress, the baby bump is noticeable.

Why is my ex's brother here?

"Where the hell is Lennox?" Dustin growls, wrapping his hands around my shoulders and shoving my back against the wall.

"What?" I sputter.

I had no idea the two of them knew each other.

"Jesus Christ," Dustin growls. "Where is your sister?"

"I don't know," I snap, slapping at his hands. I'm his niece's mother. There's no reason he should be here at all. He and I don't interact, and I like it that way. "She hasn't been home in a few days, which isn't unusual for her. Why?"

Panic slams through my chest as I start to consider that, maybe, something bad happened to her. She works at a club close by, and she's made a ton of friends. She comes and goes as she pleases, but now I'm starting to imagine terrible possibilities.

"If you see her, tell her I'm looking for her," Dustin growls, slamming me against the wall again . "She'll know why."

"Is everything okay?" Noble's voice startles not only me but also Dustin.

Dustin drops his hold on my shoulders, glaring to get his point across.

"I asked if everything is good here?" Noble's deep, growly voice echoes around the hallway as he gets closer. He moved in four or five months ago, and he's an awesome neighbor.

If he sees me struggling to carry in Libby and my groceries, he always stops what he's doing to help.

He's one fine hunk of alpha, but he also has a lot of female visitors. Like, a shit load—sometimes two or three different women pop over to his apartment in a week, which is clearly none of my business.

We're neighbors who are friendly.

Nothing more.

"Are you okay, Brooklyn?" Noble repeats.

I nod, forcing my face into a smile. "Oh, yeah, we're good. This is Dustin. He's my ex's brother."

Dustin gives me a look that screams that was the wrong thing to say.

"He just wanted to check in on Libby, but she's asleep." I laugh awkwardly. "She'll definitely be up at the crack of dawn if she sleeps through dinner."

"Tell her Uncle Dustin says hello," the slimy asshole says, like she would know who I was talking about if I did tell her. He gets close to my ear, pretending to give me a kiss on the cheek. "Keep your mouth shut about me stopping by, and I'll do the same." He gives my pregnant belly a soft pat that feels a lot like a threat.

I exhale heavily and do my best to force my face to stay placid as Dustin swaggers toward the stairs.

Noble's dark waves fall over his forehead, and his eyes narrow, but he doesn't say anything for a few long seconds. "Ready to level with me now?"

My head shakes, and my stomach rolls uncomfortably.

The urge to run and hide is strong, but I don't have a lot of options. Avan would send his henchmen to search my parents' house. I honestly don't get why he would even care if I left. He has a new girlfriend that he's been with for two months, and since getting with Bianca, he's only seen Liberty once.

I get the picture, though.

I'm supposed to stick around, never getting a chance to move on.

It's like being stuck in limbo.

Or possibly hell.

"I'm just so tired," I whisper as Noble studies my face.

"Yeah, I've been wondering how much longer you planned to keep the baby bump a secret." He chuckles. "I'm a little impressed you managed to keep it on the down low for this long."

"What?" I gasp.

"You smell sweeter than any omega I've ever scented. I've only experienced that level of indescribable sweetness once, and that was my sister while she was pregnant. Only, she smelled cloying to my senses, while you are delectable."

"So, anyone who scents me would know?" I ask, my mind racing through the repercussions, if that's true.

"Not necessarily," he says earnestly. "It took me a while to figure out that's what it was."

"Are you in 301B? I've got your delivery," a guy says, striding down the hallway.

Noble nods, moving to greet the guy.

"Let me grab some cash for the tip." I spin around and head into my apartment.

Snatching the money off the counter, I make it back to the door at the same time Noble gently pushes it open.

"I covered it." He bumps the door closed with his backside and aims for the counter.

"Here, take this then," I say, holding out the cash.

"No." He chuckles.

I drop the money on the counter and lean my forearms on top. My hips are killing me, and I need to call my sister.

My head tilts to look over my shoulder as Noble moves behind me and starts massaging my lower back.

Objectively speaking, I've always been able to tell he's a handsome guy. He has wavy dark hair, that's longer on top but shorter on the sides and dark eyes. He's also got more than a foot in height on me, but that's pretty standard for any alpha.

The short beard that frames his strong jaw flexes as he works some magic on my lumbar region and slides to the side, rubbing my throbbing hips.

Noble is the most affectionate alpha I've ever met. Even though he's very touchy-feely, we've never been this close before. But I can't seem to force myself to brush his hands away.

"You still want to play it off like that guy was just a family member popping in for a visit?" Noble asks.

"He was asking about Lennox. I didn't even know the two of them had met, which is a bad sign. Anything to do with my ex and his family generally is." I push up on my tiptoes when his huge fingers nudge against a tendon or knot that has been giving me a lot of trouble.

"And you're keeping the new baby a secret from your ex for some reason?" Noble asks.

"I don't think he'll be pleased," I say without considering my words. "It's safer this way?—"

"Mommy, I waked up," Libby says, making me jolt. "I want my orange."

"Ohmigod." I snort, pulling a hand up to run over my face. "She's never going to let that piece of fruit go."

Noble releases me and spins around. "Shortstack, you look like you really enjoyed that nap."

Libby loves Noble, and she squeals.

"Noble!" It sounds a lot like bo-bull , but she's actually advanced for being three years old. "I gots an orange!"

Okay, maybe she doesn't have perfect grammar, but she's my kid.

I'm biased.

I think she's a genius in the making.

"You do?" He heads into the living room as she flings herself at his shins. He scoops her up, walking back toward the kitchen. "Why don't you show me your orange? Then I'll get you some of this yummy dinner your mom ordered. That way, Mommy can take a shower. How does that sound?"

"Okay." Her tangled mess of dark curls bounces around her face. "You stinky, Mom?"

My head hangs.

Toddlers are excellent at one thing.

Repeating everything they hear.

Even when she doesn't want a bath, I push the issue, telling her we get sweaty and stinky when we play outside, like she does at daycare.

"She smells nice to me." Noble grins a little predatorily. "But moms deserve a few minutes to rest every once in a while, and I get the feeling your mama hasn't had that in a long time."

"Nope," Libby says, like she has any idea what all that meant. Heck, maybe she does. She's a smart kid; even the pediatrician was impressed with how clearly she speaks and the extent of her vocabulary. "Have a good shower, Mommy!"

What I really need to do is try to get a hold of Lennox.

"Are you sure you don't mind watching her while I make a phone call and grab a quick shower?" I ask, studying Noble's face for any sign he might be upset.

"Not a bit." He smiles, showing off that perfect set of straight, white teeth. "Tell Mommy to relax and take her time."

Libby tries to repeat his sentence, but she butchers it.

I give him a soft smile. "Thank you."

"I've got you, Mama." He winks, and my silly heart races as I trip over my own feet in an attempt to escape before my face turns beet red.

Lennox doesn't answer, but she does text me back to let me know that she just got to work, and she'll be home tonight after her shift.

I'll be long asleep by then, but I ask her to wake me when she gets in.

I need to know what the hell is going on with her and Dustin.

I stress about it as I scrub my stomach, trying to avoid checking if I'm getting more stretch marks.

Since becoming a mom, I've learned how to take three-minute showers, but I allow myself to lounge for an extra minute or two of pure relaxation as the water cascades around my shoulders.

Washing my hair tonight isn't happening. It's a long process that I only tackle two or three times a week.

I rush through drying off and getting dressed. Whether any of my clothing will fit these days is questionable.

I pull on a spaghetti strap maternity dress without bothering with a bra. It's one of the few pieces I wore even after Libby was born. If I had known I'd be repeating this whole pregnancy thing again so soon, I would have saved more of my maternity clothes.

The dress is way too short to wear without something under it. Grabbing a pair of cotton pajama shorts out of my drawer, I tug them on and frown when they feel a little snug.

Damn.

I didn't even try to pull the elastic band over the baby belly.

Life is hard.

Sighing, I wrap my hair up in a messy bun. The mirror isn't especially kind as I walk past, but I do my best to shake off my insecurities.

Noble is a nice guy.

He's not trying to court me.

I'm being ridiculous, so I pull my shoulders back and go check on my kid.