63. Darcy

CHAPTER 63

DARCY

"This is where I wanted to take you back in university," Hayden admits that evening from across the tiny table at the cozy family-run Italian restaurant. A candle sits between us, flicking warm light all over the handsome lines of his face, and his gaze on me is steady and kind. I'm wearing a light pink dress that reminds me of the cherry blossoms we saw today.

"What do you mean?"

He smiles, but it's tight and nervous, and I tilt my head, intrigued.

"The first week of school, I wanted to ask you out. I planned to ask you out at the party that first weekend," he amends, rubbing the back of his neck.

My lips part in surprise. That first week of school, I looked forward to class and seeing Hayden, my new friend who loved The Northern Sword , had muscles carved from stone, and had an open, affectionate smile. Despite how handsome and popular he was—everyone already seemed to know him, probably from hockey—and knowing he was hilariously out of my league, I felt so at ease and comfortable with him from the start.

"The hockey party."

He nods .

I had hoped he would ask me out that week. I thought Kit was inviting me to the party as friends, but when I got there, he made it seem like we were more, and I went along with it. Hayden didn't seem to care; he was chatting with other girls all night, and although I was disappointed, I didn't give it too much attention.

I've thought back to that week so many times over the years, but I've always told myself I wasn't Hayden's type.

"I thought you were going to ask me out, too." I look down at the white tablecloth, remembering. "I hoped you would. I guess I could have asked you out, but you were so out of my league that it seemed like a great opportunity for rejection." My mouth twists. "And it would have made things awkward, with us being in the same class all semester."

He leans forward and takes my hand. "I was never out of your league. Just the opposite."

"I was the dorky math girl and you were the hot hockey player who could have anyone."

"That's not how I see it."

My heart lodges in my throat, and I'm swept away in the happy, floaty feelings. I love the way he looks at me, like I'm everything to him.

I want to say something like it all worked out in the end , but I don't know if it will. He's trying his hand at this relationship thing.

What if I'm the girl who always got away, but once he has me, he realizes the idea of me was better than the reality?

He smiles, holding my eyes, and the server swings by with my dessert. A single candle sits in the middle of the chocolate torte, dancing and flickering.

"Happy birthday, Darcy," Hayden says, watching me with a smile, brushing his thumb over the back of my hand. "Make a wish. "

I close my eyes, think about the past few months with Hayden, and wish that it will work out in the end.

"Have I told you how beautiful you are?" Hayden asks as we walk home hand in hand.

I laugh. "A few times."

"Only a few?" His mouth curves but his expression turns watchful and serious. "How are you feeling about your birthday?"

Right. My goal of figuring everything out by my birthday.

"Great, surprisingly." I take a big breath and gather my thoughts. "I think I always dreaded my birthday because deep down, I knew I was on the wrong path. The wrong job, the wrong guy."

I don't have everything figured out, especially not with Hayden, but my life feels a lot better than it did this time last year.

"I wish I could go back to myself a few months ago, give her a big hug, and tell her everything would be okay." With a little smile, I nudge him. "I guess you did that."

"You didn't believe me?" His eyes glint.

"I wasn't sure. I needed to prove it to myself."

"And you did."

I hum a happy acknowledgment, taking in the man beside me, heart squeezing with something warm and intense. "Yeah. I did. I'm so lucky to have you."

He stops walking, holds my gaze, and swallows. It looks like he wants to say something, but instead, he glances behind me.

Oh. We're at the entrance to the small side street where the Filthy Flamingo is.

"Let's get a drink, birthday girl. "

I nod, smiling. "Sure. Let's go say hi to Jordan."

Hayden pulls his phone out and sends a quick text, then he takes my hand again and leads me down the alley. When we reach the bar with the unmarked door, he holds it open, but it's dark inside. I hesitate in the doorway.

"I think it's closed." On a Friday night? That's weird. There are no windows in the bar, so I can't see a thing. "Did Jordan forget to lock the front door? We should call her."

"Turn the goddamned light on," someone grumbles in the dark, and I jump out of my skin. It sounds like Alexei…

The lights flick on and my jaw drops at the bar full of people and balloons.