24. Darcy

CHAPTER 24

DARCY

Hayden blinks like I've grown another head. "What?"

He looks so serious and stricken that I start laughing. "Hayden, don't be so uptight. I know you have one."

His eyes flash with heat, his gaze drops to my mouth, and he swallows. "I don't know. Depends on the situation and how I'm feeling." A frisson of electricity runs up my spine at the dark look in his eyes. "Probably whatever position makes her come the hardest."

My stomach dips at the image of Hayden in bed, giving his partner his full attention as he works to make her come. My pulse begins to pound between my legs, and I sip the rest of my drink down to the ice.

"You?" he asks lightly.

My mind has gone blank, and I can't remember a single position. I'm just thinking about Hayden in bed and what it would be like. His body is ridiculous, and paired with his thoughtful, fun-loving nature, sleeping with Hayden Owens might be a life-changing experience.

No wonder he's a rumored sex god.

I get a mental image of him on top of me, pressing me into the bed with his size and weight. I'm on my stomach, and when he pushes inside me, my eyes roll back at the intense fullness of him, the sensation of his lips on the back of my neck, and the low rumble of his groan.

My skin burns hot. "The one where I'm on my stomach, lying down?" My voice sounds thin and high. "And he's on top of me?" I clear my throat.

"That's a good one." His voice is hoarse, and he's gripping his glass so hard his knuckles go white. "Easier to give you a G-spot orgasm." He blinks. "Her. Give her a G-spot orgasm."

My curiosity piques. "Do most guys know how to give a girl a G-spot orgasm? It's the spot on the front wall of the?—"

"I know what the G-spot is, Darcy." His eyes close briefly.

Of course he does. "I know you do." My face goes red as I try not to picture Hayden in my bed, fingers buried deep inside me, coaxing me closer to an orgasm. Heat coils low in my belly and I cross my legs, squeezing tight.

"What about other guys?" I peek over at him. "Is that something guys talk about in the locker room?"

"Not really."

His expression is unusually flat, totally devoid of humor or teasing, and embarrassment floods through me. Oh god . I just asked my wingman a horrifying question.

"You know what?" My voice is high, and I laugh to lighten the tension. "Pretend I never asked. This is mortifying. I think I'm drunk."

That makes Hayden huff with amusement, and the grin splitting across his face eases some of my humiliation. "You're not drunk."

"I'm not drunk," I confirm. "I just say dumb things sometimes. Sorry. I was going for fun, flirty conversation, and I took us straight to weird and inappropriate."

"No." He shakes his head, smiling a little. "It's fine. You can ask me anything." His gaze slides to me, curious. "Why are you asking about this?"

My face burns again. The answer is embarrassing.

"Darce," he coaxes, starting to grin.

"Because I don't think I've ever had one?" I wince. "I don't mean to put you in an awkward position. You won't tell anyone, right? I don't want people thinking Kit is, like, bad in bed or something."

He was just vanilla. A little passive and tentative. Rushed.

Boring , a voice whispers in my head. Selfish .

Hayden shakes his head, mouth flattening. "I won't say a word."

"Did Kit ever mention anything about that stuff to you?"

Alarm flashes in his eyes. "Sex stuff?"

I nod.

"No. Well—" He runs a hand over his hair, adopting an uneasy expression. "In December, he said something that implied you two weren't really…" His eyes meet mine. "Yeah."

"Sleeping together."

"Yep."

I'm sure Hayden has a thousand questions, but he's too polite to ask. In the last six months of our relationship, Kit and I had sex twice. I knew things weren't right, and I was talking myself in and out of breaking up with him, and sleeping together felt disingenuous. Like I was lying or giving him false hope.

He gives me a sidelong look. "You want to talk about it?"

"No." I sigh. "Yes. I don't know. Nothing was wrong. Was the sex mind-blowing and life-altering? No. It was just sex. It was comfortable and predictable and nice."

"Nice," Hayden repeats in a weird tone, looking straight ahead.

"Yes. Nice. Simple. That's how sex in a relationship is." Another reason why I'm not eager to jump back into something long term. I want my fun hookup years.

"We were each other's first." I swallow past a knot, stirring the ice in my glass. "We didn't know what we were doing. I still don't, obviously. So I'm curious about what's out there." The idea of fooling around with some strange guy makes my muscles tense in a bad way, though. "When I'm ready."

"When you're ready," he echoes.

We're quiet for a long time, and with every second, I regret opening my big mouth.

"Have you tried a toy?" Hayden finally asks, glancing at me.

"Once," I admit. Thank god it's dark in here. My face is probably the color of a tomato. "I didn't like it. It was…" I search for the words. "Aggressive? Scary? Felt like a power sander on my lady parts?"

"Jesus," Hayden mutters.

I don't mention that Kit bought it. He was disappointed that it didn't work the way he wanted, and we never spoke of it again.

"It was loud and distracting, and I kept worrying the neighbors could hear?" A laugh slips out of me, and the corners of Hayden's mouth turn up, but his eyes are still watchful and concerned. "I didn't like it," I say again.

Another beat of silence, and my face heats even more.

"There are other toys out there." He stares at his drink. I watch his Adam's apple bob as he swallows. "Quieter ones."

"I'm sure there are, but I'm not brave enough to go into a store and ask questions." I shudder in preemptive embarrassment. "And every time I browse online, I get overwhelmed with the choices. There are literally thousands of toys online. How do I know which one is the best? Do I just order ten and try them all out?" I make a face. "And what do I do with the ones I don't like? Throw them in the garbage? What if someone sees?"

Hayden's shoulders are shaking with laughter, and I clamp my mouth shut.

"See?" I give him a look. "This is my problem. I overthink everything."

"Yeah." He smiles back at me, affection warming his eyes. "You're too in your head."

He makes a low humming noise, and I'd do anything to know what's in his head.

"I can see you thinking," I say. "Spit it out."

He hesitates. "I can help." His voice is low and a little rough, a gentle scrape that makes the back of my neck prickle, and his eyes flash with heat.

Fire races through me, and again, my mind goes to the danger zone, imagining his mouth on my neck and his hand trailing down my body, sneaking beneath my clothes, slipping into my panties, stroking over me. I picture his eyes glazed with heat and his flirty, amused smile as I writhe under him.

We shouldn't be doing this , I'd say. I know , he'd whisper back with a wicked smile. Desire tightens between my thighs.

"I'll ask around and find some suggestions," he continues. "For toys." His throat works. "I can ask the women I know."

Embarrassment replaces the horny thoughts, and I want to sink into the floor. He wasn't referring to helping me like that .

"That's okay." I wince. "I don't want everyone knowing about this."

"I'm not going to tell them it's for you." He frowns. "This stays between us. I'd never talk about your personal stuff with anyone." His jaw shifts and he folds his arms over his chest. "It's important that you get comfortable with what you like." He swallows again, meeting my eyes. "In bed. "

The horny thoughts creep back into my head, but I force them out again. "You make a good point. How am I supposed to ask a guy to do something if I can't do it myself?"

His jaw flexes, and he looks like he wants to say more, but the bartender swings by, and the conversation is over.