Chapter 61

WhenLouisa finally stood to her feet again, she found herself covered in mud and twigs and blood, and sore and sticky all over.

Killikand Ulfarr didn't look much better — gods, Killik looked like he'd just crawled through a battlefield — but neither of them seemed concerned. If anything, Killik looked decidedly pleased with himself, and even shot a satisfied grin toward — Rurik?

Louisahad fully forgotten about Rurik, but yes, he was still here, leaning impatiently against a tree, with his arms crossed over his chest. "Finally," he snapped, as he strode toward them, and then knelt to touch a hand at Louisa's bloody ankle. "Is this wound yet pain, woman?"

Louisablinked downwards — gods, she'd nearly forgotten about her wounds, too. "It does seem much better," she replied, with genuine relief. "It just stings a bit, maybe."

Ruriknodded, and his hand carefully shifted against it, as something prickled beneath Louisa's skin. Dragging up another question, one that had been vaguely nagging at the back of her thoughts. "So your healing really is… magic?" she asked him, careful. "LikeEfterar's, at the mountain? Is that — something Skai can usually do?"

Rurikshrugged, and shifted his hand again on her ankle. "No," he said, without looking up. "But one of my fathers was Ash-Kai, and his seed granted me some of his skill, before I was birthed. I am not near as gifted as Efterar, but" — he rose to his feet, gave a smug smile — "I have my eye on an Ash-Kai in the north who may rival him, with time."

Itseemed like such a Skai thing to say, suddenly, and Louisa couldn't help smiling back at him, even as she gave an experimental roll of her ankle. "Well, I wish you luck," she replied. "And thank you."

Ruriknodded, and then glanced toward Rikard's unconscious, still-sprawled body. Which now showed no signs of actual wounds, beyond his torn, bloody clothes — but Louisa could still make out his breath, faintly rising and falling in his chest. "I have also healed this man's wounds, as best I could," Rurik said. "Even the eye, as long as no one looks too closely at this. AndI have thickened the veins around his heart, to match those of a long-held illness. He ought to live yet three or four more days, but no more than a week."

Itseemed like such a cold, calculated death, suddenly, and Louisa winced as she glanced at Rikard's pale, familiar face. "And he won't wake up again?" she asked, tentative. "Or be in pain?"

Besideher, Killik scoffed, and muttered something about Rikard planning to mutilate her with her own knife — but Rurik shook his head. "His brain shall not again awaken," he said firmly. "ButI shall help carry him off to his bed, to make sure of this. I shall need four of your packmates as bearers, I ken."

Ulfarrreadily nodded, and signed toward Igull, Elgr, Halthorr, and Ragni, all of whom had re-emerged through the trees. And after a brief discussion of how they would cover the deception — cleaning off Rikard's blood, dressing him in nightclothes, placing him in bed — they quickly built a makeshift stretcher from nearby deadwood, and heaved Rikard's unconscious bulk onto it.

"We again thank you, brother," Ulfarr said toward Rurik, once the four orcs had lifted the stretcher between them. "Your help has been a great gift from Skai-kesh toward us."

ButRurik only waved it away, and give Killik and Ulfarr a cool, assessing look. "You can thank me by sending help to build my own camp, when I am ready," he replied. "And by inviting me to join your rut upon your woman, also."

What? Louisa's mouth dropped open, but Rurik only spun around, and waved for the orcs to carry Rikard away. LeavingLouisa to dart a disbelieving look between Killik and Ulfarr, who were both looking… thoughtful. As though they were actually considering this bizarre demand of Rurik's?

"Ach, you could do worse, woman," Killik said, with a sly grin toward her. "I hear healers make for clever bedmates, ach?"

Louisaspluttered at him, her face flooding with heat, her eyes helplessly darting toward where Rurik and the orcs had already disappeared through the trees. "You really would both be fine with that?" she demanded, too sharp. "I thought — I thought you said you didn't want to do the sharing anymore!"

Ulfarr'sbrow had been slowly furrowing, but at that last bit, it abruptly cleared again. "No, I should not wish to share either of you, as I have borne with Killik," he replied. "But it would not be… the same, in a rut thus, together."

Louisablinked blankly toward Ulfarr — what did he mean, it wasn't the same? And she should be offended by that, right? Appalled that he would want to share her, with orcs like Rurik?!

Butwait, now Killik stepped between them, his hand stroking up and down Louisa's back. "Wolf means," he said, with a sharp look toward Ulfarr, "the scents are not the same, when it is done thus. In a rut, if Wolf leads this, all else shall yet scent of him and serve him, ach? Not only you, but any other orcs he grants you, also. It would speak of Wolf's standing amongst his kin, that he can wield such power, and share such a gift."

Louisashot an uncertain glance toward Ulfarr, who was nodding gratefully at Killik, and then sliding his hand around her waist, too. "But there is yet no need for this, Louisa," he said, with a gentle kiss to her hair. "None at all."

Butwhen Louisa drew away to study him, he did look… flushed. Interested. His breaths drawing in deep, his eyes warm and bright on hers. And wait, were his trousers bulging? Again?

"Really?" she demanded, staring at him, and then darting a helpless look at Killik, too. "Andyou actually would want this rut, too?!"

Killikshrugged, though his eyes on hers were thoughtful, considering. "Ach, if you both wished for this, I would," he said, with a shrug. "Ruts have long been a deep Skai rite, and we do not oft fuss over scents, as some other clans do. AndI ken" — his eyes glinted with distinct satisfaction — "it should not be a hardship to flaunt and command our lusty Skai woman before all our clan. To bring them all to their knees for her, and then watch her spurt and squeal upon the biggest, most perfect prick of them all, ach?"

Heshot a saucy glance toward Ulfarr, who betrayed a low gasp, his hand adjusting his tented trousers. While something heated low and strange in Louisa's belly, too — and she belatedly shook her head, drew up breath, and strength. Truth. Skai.

"But," she managed, though her voice was hoarse. "I wouldn't want to share — you. Either of you."

Shebraced for their answer, for maybe their mockery, for even the end of this, after all — but Ulfarr's hand just kept stroking her back, while Killik laughed, and rolled his eyes. "No, you ken?" he drawled. "We would have never guessed this, woman."

Louisaglared at him, even as a skittering relief fluttered through her belly. "I mean it, Killik," she insisted. "It wouldn't be — fair. I wouldn't be able to handle it. I would just be — too jealous. And if that's what you both really want, then maybe you should still find someone else, someone who —"

Buther voice broke there, because Ulfarr's strong arms dragged her close, wrapping her tight against his solid chest. "Ach, no, Louisa," he breathed. "None of this. I yet have no wish to bed any others, beyond Killik, and you."

Oh. Louisa sagged against him, her breath heaving out, and that was again the feel of Killik's arm too, circling around her and Ulfarr both. "You shall not now leave us, woman," Killik said, clipped. "And again, this is not the same, for I can scent you. I can scent every orc you touch. I can scent whether you bear true longing for him, or not. Youcannot hide this from me. But when you cannot scent this…"

Hisvoice faded, and when Louisa twitched to look at him, he was studying Ulfarr, with a strange new stillness on his face. "When you cannot fully scent this," he repeated, slower, "you cannot… know. You can only see me ploughing and touching and kissing another. You can only seek to trust the words I speak to you, and hope them to be truth. But if I speak no words, then…"

Hegrimaced, his eyes briefly closing, his hand sliding up to spread against Ulfarr's face. "I am sorry, Wolf," he murmured. "This was not… fair, to you."

Ulfarrswallowed, his eyes shifting, but Louisa could feel his hand spasming against her, his former hardness rapidly softening in his trousers. Suggesting that not being able to smell Killik's truth truly had made this more difficult for him — or perhaps even made him believe that Killik didn't care about him at all.

"But wouldn't it feel the same… with me?" Louisa finally asked, into the silence. "Wouldn't that also upset you, sweetheart?"

Ulfarrgrimaced, and his glance toward Killik was almost pleading — to which Killik huffed a laugh, and leaned over to nip at Louisa's neck. "You cannot think Wolf would ever allow you to run off and find pleasure without him, as I did?" he said flatly. "No. He should only grant this whilst you are gasping in his arms, and leaking his fresh seed. And whilst I am there to scent you, and make sure you behave for us."

Louisa'sbreath exhaled in a rush, her gaze again finding Ulfarr — and yes, he was nodding, the relief flickering in his eyes. "Ach, just thus," he said, soft. "But again, there is no need for this, should you not wish. You have already granted us such great joy, Louisa. More than I could ever have dreamt."

Louisasmiled back at him, slow and wavering, while Killik scoffed, and gently slapped her arse. "Well, dream more, Wolf," he said lightly. "She shall come around, I ken."

Louisashot a glare at him, but he only grinned back, and patted her cheek. "Think upon it," he said. "Now, are we done here? I should be most glad to wash off this man's stench."

Hewaved toward the blood still spattered across his face and chest, and Louisa choked a laugh as she glanced down at her tattered dress, too. She was a filthy mess, yes, but she was safe. She was whole. She was Skai.

Andeven if it wasn't fully official yet, it still felt… right. True. In the way Killik and Ulfarr fell into step on either side of her as they turned toward the road, Ulfarr's hand spreading on her back. Walking together, breathing together, as more contented warmth shimmered up Louisa's spine. She still had Killik and Ulfarr. She still had her sisters and the children. She still had her home, her property, the camp. And she still had — herself. Her health. Her life.

Butgods, it had still been so close. Only a few more moments, and she would have been lying there dead, and everything she'd built would have been lost forever. And gods only knew what fool lord would inherit Rikard's lands after his death, and she still had all those debts, and…

Wait. The debts. And there was still something to that, something they hadn't yet addressed…

"You mentioned, back there," Louisa abruptly said, with a sideways glance at Ulfarr, "that you were… gathering that payment we agreed on. Didn't you?"

Hervoice came out steady, not judging or angry, but just… asking. Just wanting to hear the truth, to finally set it all out between them. Because that payment was something else she hadn't wanted to face, wasn't it? Something she'd wanted to escape, and forget.

Butperhaps Ulfarr had wanted to escape it too, his mouth twisting, while on her other side, Killik gave a gentle slap to her arse. "Ach, we are yet gathering it," he replied. "And you shall yet have it, woman. It has only taken longer than we meant."

Louisastudied him for a long moment, searching for the truth in that, seeking to find the right question. Because perhaps she'd realized, over these past weeks, that Killik and Ulfarr weren't wealthy. They didn't have that much extra coin lying around. And neither did their campmates, or even their clan, and…

"You're borrowing it, then?" she asked, her voice careful. "From where?"

Killikshrugged, and gave a vague wave ahead toward the camp, toward their mountain. "From many places," he replied. "But naught that shall bring us harm, or lead to your land being lost. So there is no need to fret over it, ach?"

Louisawatched him for another long, hitching breath, as her stomach flipped in her gut. They were — taking her debts upon themselves. And they weren't even trying to take that part of their agreement back, even now that they'd settled the rest of it between them. They'd made a vow to pay her debts, and they were keeping it.

"Well," Louisa said, through her choked throat. "I've decided I want to break that vow. We didn't keep to the ten nights, and I don't want the rest of your coin, either."

Therewas more silence, from Killik and Ulfarr both, and they exchanged a meaningful glance, as Ulfarr's hand caressed against her back. "But — we yet wish to help you, Louisa," Ulfarr said, low. "We wish to uphold your wishes. And you wish to keep your home, and guard your kin, ach? You wish to have control over your property, your freedom, and your life."

Right. It was a direct quote of what Louisa had told him earlier, and she drew in breath, searched for truth. "I do still want all that," she replied slowly. "But maybe — maybe we can face it together, and find another way. Like we did with the Summit. Your last payment was enough to keep the property safe for at least a while longer, and in terms of the inheritance issue…"

Herfeet suddenly tripped, faltered, her gaze blank and unseeing on the darkening horizon. While both Killik and Ulfarr snapped to stillness too, Ulfarr's hand tense on her back, Killik's circling tight around her wrist.

"What?" Killik demanded. "What is amiss?"

Louisahuffed a half-laugh, and shook her head. "I just…" she began, and her heart was pattering faster, her breaths heaving short and shallow. "I was just thinking" — she darted a look between them — "marriage isn't the only option, right? Maybe we could consider — another family connection, instead?"

BothUlfarr and Killik were just watching her now, waiting, and Louisa found the earth beneath her feet, drew it in deep. Drew in strength, truth, Skai…

"What if," she said, as the hope caught, held, shimmered. "What if I adopted Sune?"