Chapter 59

Ulfarrwould have their truth. Now.

Louisafroze, blinked at him, and then at Killik, who looked just as startled as she felt. And for an instant, as their eyes held, it was almost as though that old familiar crackle of understanding passed between them, speaking their confusion aloud. Is this Wolf? Is he actually angry with us? What does he want?

Butnow Ulfarr loudly cleared his throat, raising his hand. Instantly calling the attention of all the Skai around them, all of them pausing their work to look, even Sune. "I thank you for your good work, brothers," Ulfarr said, his voice clear and carrying. "I now need a spell alone with my — with Killik and Louisa. Igull and Elgr, I shall be grateful if you yet stand guard for us. AndSune" — his eyes flicked over toward where Sune was intently studying them — "if you and your friends should go ready a bath and fresh clothes for Louisa at her house, we should all be most thankful."

Louisaexchanged another brief, uncertain glance with Killik, but through the trees, Sune nodded, as a small smile spread across his mouth. Ach, Pa, he signed back. You can depend upon me.

Itwas the first time Louisa had seen him use the sign Pa — his fist briefly touching his forehead — and Ulfarr smiled back too, slow and almost painfully fond. Thank you, son, he signed back. We love you.

Suneducked his head, and then spun around and left, his back very straight. And when Louisa met Killik's eyes again, they looked oddly bright, his mouth pressed thin. As if Sune calling UlfarrPa had meant something to him, too.

"Now," Ulfarr said, as his eyes shifted back to Louisa, and then Killik. "My scenting is not what it once was, but I can yet scent the truth of this. Thus" — he waved Killik closer — "you shall now help me tend Louisa's wounds, pup. You shall show her your fealty and your care. And whilst you do this, you shall speak. You shall tell Louisa your truth."

Acurious little shiver swept up Louisa's spine, and Killik twitched too, his gaze darting between Ulfarr and Louisa. Looking uncertain, resistant, maybe even afraid…

"Do this, Killik," came Ulfarr's voice, heavy with decision, with command. "Speak your truth to her. Now."

Killiktwitched again, shot Ulfarr a glance that was almost pleading — but Ulfarr just frowned back at him, waiting. UntilKillik finally jerked a nod, and then dropped to his knees beside Louisa on the ground. The movement unusually stilted, awkward, and he didn't meet her eyes as he snatched for her still-bloody hand, and brought it to his mouth.

"A-ach," he said, hoarse, followed by a brief, furtive lick against Louisa's palm. "I — I wished — for this, woman. With — you."

Heshot another brief, helpless glance toward Ulfarr, but Ulfarr kept frowning back, even as he lifted Louisa's other hand, and began kissing it, too. "From the start?" he demanded. "Or only after you came to know her better? Tell us the tale, Killik."

Killik'shot breath shuddered out against Louisa's skin, and that was another brief, shaky touch of his tongue. "I had no — no wish for this, at the start," he replied, hoarse. "Humans are so oft fickle, and foolish, and selfish. They spew their falsehoods, they make vows they do not keep, they condemn our ways, they call down shame and judgement and death upon us. Why would I wish for any of this?"

Ulfarrnodded, his eyes still held to Killik's face. Waiting as Killik drew in a shaky inhale, his tongue again trailing against Louisa's skin. "ButI yet knew how much you wished for a woman, Wolf," he croaked. "So ach, I let you believe I wished for it someday also, so I might better learn what you longed for. And then" — he shuddered out an exhale — "I went hunting."

Ulfarrkept waiting, watching, while Killik drew in another slow, ragged breath, and pressed another kiss to Louisa's skin. "I watched dozens of women, over many moons," he continued. "ButI could not bear any of them, and most of all, I could not bear the thought of them with you, Wolf. I was sure I had failed, until" — his eyes darted to Louisa's face — "I heard Rosa and Jule speaking of this Louisa who had helped them. And they said Simon had met her, also — so I went to him, and asked his counsel. And he did not know I was asking for you, and he said — he said she would make me a good, worthy Skai mate, and he would be glad to uphold this."

Louisa'shand trembled against Killik's mouth, but he kept kissing, kept speaking. "SoI watched her for many, many days," he said, faster now. "I watched her hunt, and work, and care for her kin. She was brave, and true, and did not whine or falter, or blame her hardships on others. ButI yet wished to test her, and be sure she was worthy of you — so I carved the rassja, and told her to use this, and prove this to me. I was sure she would fight this, or flee from this, but instead, she… welcomed this. She welcomed my pleasure, and my command."

Louisa'smemories flicked backwards to that first night, to that stain across the front of Killik's trousers. And perhaps he recalled it too, betraying another hard little quiver, his kiss now skating up her wrist, to the torn skin of her forearm. "This… surprised me," he whispered. "And… pleased me. ButI wished her for you, Wolf, so I sought to forget this, and grant her to you, and drive her away from me — but I could not stay away. I could not stop longing for this, could not keep to my own aims, and —"

Hewas breathing hard, now, as if every word was a struggle, and he raised his head to glare at Ulfarr, his teeth bared. "Andyou kept pushing this," he rasped. "You kept drawing me into this, binding me into this. Telling me to speak to her, to comfort her, to walk her home, to take her hunting. Sending me off to plough her, alone, and then come tell you the tale!"

Louisablinked — had sweet, guileless Ulfarr really done all that? — but his smile toward Killik was slow, deliberate, and surprisingly wicked. "I only granted you what you wished for, pup," he murmured. "I did not see you fighting me, ach?"

Killikgave an exaggerated roll of his eyes, and jabbed his claw at Ulfarr's face. "I was seeking to help you, you great brute," he snapped. "I wished to please you, and bring you joy, and peace!"

Butat that, Ulfarr's expression sobered, and his hand reached to spread against Killik's back. "And you did, pup," he said, quiet. "Both of you. You have brought me such peace, and such hope, and such healing. And ach, I loved how you scented together, I loved how you played and laughed and worked together, and found such joy together. And the longer we did this, the more I hoped — I prayed — that you would both forget these ten nights, and come to welcome this, also. For you are so much alike, ach? So fierce and lusty and kind and true."

Killik'seyes darted toward Louisa, and then away again. But an unmistakable flush was creeping up his neck, and he abruptly bent down again, pressing his mouth to the scrapes on her forearm. As if still hiding from this, perhaps, resisting this, not wanting to speak this…

WhenUlfarr's big hand grasped the back of Killik's neck, and yanked him up. Making him look at him, and at Louisa, and even giving him a gentle little shake. "DidI say you were done, pup?" he hissed, his eyes glittering. "I need you to keep speaking. I need you to show Louisa what I can scent upon you. I need you to stand beside me, and show her how much we care for her. I need you to prove this to me, Killik. Now."

Prove this. Now. It rang all through Louisa's body, resonating hard and deep — while Killik shuddered, spasmed, his eyes blown wide on Ulfarr's face. And when Ulfarr released him, Killik jerked a nod, and then — then scrabbled for Louisa's skirts. Shoving them up, spreading her legs apart, his body skittering down in between, so he could…

Sohe could kneel before her, and bury his face between her thighs.

Louisagasped, stared, trembled all over — but oh, oh, Killik was doing this. His mouth latched between her legs, his tongue plunging deep. Kissing her, lavishing her, licking her from the inside out. And he'd never, never done this before, not once, and Louisa couldn't stop shaking, staring, shivering at the sight of it, the feel of it, the truth of it. Killik's hard mouth, his demanding tongue, his sharp teeth, all working with such desperate determination upon her, feasting upon her, firing her full of heat and hunger and raw, breathless need.

Hewas… proving this.

Andhis frantic, fluttering eyes even held on hers as he did it, as if begging her to see, to understand. To see the truth in this, even if he couldn't yet speak it. He wanted this, he wanted her, even though he'd lied to her, he'd made those awful plans, he'd tried to walk away…

"Better, pup," came Ulfarr's low voice, his hand again curving around the back of Killik's neck. "But she yet cannot scent you, ach? I told you to speak."

Ahard shudder wrenched through Killik's entire body, even into his tongue still thrusting inside Louisa, sparking out bliss all around it — but he didn't pull away, and his eyes glimmering on hers looked almost pleading. Almost… in pain, somehow, because he couldn't speak it, he couldn't, because…

You only wish for a helpmeet. A vassal. A sharp sword by your side, and a hard prick in your bed…

"Wolf," Louisa began, before she'd even caught it. SnappingUlfarr's gaze to hers, his head tilting, his brow furrowing. Listening. And she had to think, damn it, think through the rampaging pleasure of Killik's feasting mouth, his seeking gorging tongue, please…

I am… useful. Always at hand. ButI am not… wanted. When has he ever spoken this? Or shown me this?

"Look, I think," she told Ulfarr, between heavy breaths. "I think — Killik needs to know your truth first. He needs you to tell him. To show him."

Ulfarr'seyes caught, flickered, and then dropped to Killik's kneeling form. And then held there, glimmering with something like grief, like worry, like… fear.

Andmaybe it was the pleasure, reeling Louisa's certainty close. Or maybe it was the memory of that epiphany she and Killik had stumbled upon, that night with the chain in the kofi. The night they'd finally seen Ulfarr's fear, and taken that chain off, and told him they'd trusted him.

"You won't hurt him, sweetheart," Louisa said, quiet but steady. "He's not your small, weak, innocent pup anymore. You don't need to protect him, or keep him safe from you."

Ulfarr'seyes darted back to hers, looking for an instant almost as pleading as Killik's — and Louisa took a ragged breath, held his gaze. "You don't, Wolf," she insisted. "If anything, Killik has protected you. He's stood beside you for twenty damned years. He's dragged you from the darkness again and again. He's given you hope, and purpose, and peace. He's given you a home, and a family."

Killik'smouth between her legs faltered, his eyes now strange and still on her face, and she drew up his strength, his truth. "Killik is a strong, capable, brilliantSkai," she said. "And whatever your truth is, he can handle it. He deserves it."

Ulfarrblinked down at Killik's still-kneeling form, and his broad shoulders rose and fell, heaving with his breaths. His hand rubbing at his mouth, as that fear kept glimmering, shimmering in his eyes. WhileLouisa kept waiting, her heart skipping, her shaky fingers finding Killik's silken hair, feeling the way he was faintly trembling beneath her touch…

"Show us, sweetheart," she whispered, searching Ulfarr's face. "We want to know. Please."

Ulfarr'seyes squeezed shut, his breath filling his chest… and then — a nod. A shudder. A jerk of his hand to the chain of his belt. Drawing it out, off, away from his trousers, so he could…

Sohe could lunge forward, and swing it around Killik'sneck.