Chapter 52

Louisaslept badly that night, despite the solid safety of Ulfarr's body beneath her, and the warmth of the fur and the fire.

Killikhad gone. Killik thought Ulfarr didn't care. Killik had maybe — maybe — spent the night with someone else.

Itall wrenched and churned in Louisa's belly, dark and angry and hopelessly jealous. It had been so close, so good and right between them, and now Killik had to run off and ruin everything, again.

Butthe longer Louisa lay there, trying and failing to sleep, the stronger the suspicion grew. Twisting into a single sharp, devastating question, shouting again and again through her thoughts…

HadKillikplanned to do this? Had he planned… to leave?

Because— the way he'd looked. The way he'd spoken. It had all felt so… resigned. So… finished, as if it had all gone according to his plan. His plan to heal Ulfarr, to find him a woman, to help him regain his place, and build a home. To offer the ultimate gift, the ultimate sacrifice, to the orc he'd always loved so much, the orc he didn't believe loved him the same in return…

Andafterwards, once it was done, Killik would sink that dagger deep, and walk away. Knowing he'd done all he could, and given his best possible farewell.

The woman who will steal Wolf away from us.

Louisasqueezed her eyes shut, fought to steady her shaky breaths, but the questions just kept shouting louder, harder. Alongside all those memories of Killik's reluctance, Killik's anger, Killik's other bedmates, Killik saying no, Killik walking away again and again. As if he'd been fighting this, fighting his decision on this, losing his patience and his temper — but then always, always coming back. GuidingLouisa and Ulfarr. Directing them. Helping them. Making sure it worked, making sure they fell in love. Making sure Louisa… stayed.

Butnow — what was Killik planning next? Had he meant to move away? To leave the camp? To leave Sune, and make a life somewhere else, maybe at the mountain, or another camp? But no, no, he wouldn't… or would he?

Louisadesperately wanted to go find him, to hunt him down and demand answers, demand his truth — but no. No. Gods only knew where he'd gone, and she couldn't risk alerting the entire clan to some major conflict between them, not now. Not with Ulfarr's fate still in question, and the camp's fate still in question, with the Summit's public OpenHouse in the morning…

Butit made for an awful night's sleep, full of misery and fury and frustration. And when Ulfarr finally stirred awake beneath Louisa, what felt like an eternity later, he must have instantly caught it on her face, or maybe in her scent.

"Is aught amiss, Louisa?" he asked, his bleary eyes sharpening on hers. "Where is — where is Killik?"

Thealarm was already there, too close in his raspy voice, and at least Louisa didn't need to lie, not entirely. "I — I'm not sure," she replied. "Maybe just out for a walk. Or hunting?"

ButUlfarr was fully frowning now, his eyes darting between Louisa and the door, and he groped for her dress, and passed it toward her. "We shall find him," he said grimly. "Come."

Louisanodded, and once she'd cleaned up and dressed, she quietly followed Ulfarr toward the door, past the huddles of their sleeping, snoring guests. And though Ulfarr held his gaze straight ahead, she could feel the urgency radiating from him, twitching all through his big body. Because — because he couldn't bear Killik leaving, either. He loved Killik, he did. And if Killik had gone off and spent the night with someone else, Louisa truly was going to murder him.

Outside, it was very early morning, the sun just rising through the trees, the camp just beginning to stir. Several guests were climbing out of tents and shelters, and a yawning Thomas was already cooking by the fire, raising a hand in greeting toward them. And there was a bleary-eyed but pleased-looking Ragni, returning from his overnight shift on guard duty with several bulky orcs from the mountain, and Kori and Fasti were stretching together in one of the hanging hammocks, their limbs and hair askew.

Andblinking toward it, toward this cozy, lovely camp in the rising sunlight, there was suddenly only longing, so deep and heavy Louisa swayed on her feet. Gods, she wanted this. She wanted all of this. She wanted to stay here. She wanted to fix this, and make this work. She wanted Ulfarr, and she wanted…

"Killik!" she exclaimed, with shaky, staggering relief, as his lean, bare-chested body swung down from the trees above. He was still here, he hadn't left, thank the gods…

Butwait. He hadn't come from Ulfarr'skofi, so that meant he'd slept… somewhere else. And who had he slept with, had he still ruined everything —

BesideLouisa, Ulfarr had stiffened all over, his eyes narrow and surprisingly flinty on where Killik was striding toward them. ButKillik's face was carefully smooth, expressionless, what had he done, what had he decided…

"Where were you, Killik?" Ulfarr demanded, his voice harsh enough to make Louisa blink. "Why did you leave us?"

Killikblinked too, and flicked a brief, almost imperceptible glance toward Louisa's face. "I stayed the night with Sune," he said, too lightly. "Thought one of us ought to make sure he stayed out of trouble."

Oh. Louisa's relief shuddered through her breath, dropped her stiff shoulders — but damn it, Killik could still be lying, he could still have found another bedmate first… right? And perhaps Ulfarr thought the same, because he lurched toward Killik, and thrust his face down into his neck. So he could… smell him. So he could make sure he was telling the truth.

Butyes, yes, Ulfarr's breath exhaled with obvious relief, his hand clapping firm against Killik's shoulder. WhileKillik's eyes stayed carefully unreadable, even as he gave Ulfarr's back a brisk pat in return.

"Good morn to you also, Wolf," he said. "Now, we ought to make ourselves ready for this Summit, ach? Sune says Cecily has set out fancy clothes for us, and we have much left to prepare, do we not?"

Right. The official OpenHouse was set to begin at noon, with their full slate of games, classes, and activities. And while they'd set much of it up already, there were still multiple crucial items on their list for the morning. SoLouisa drew in breath, and made herself nod, even as her eyes kept searching Killik's face. While beside her, Ulfarr nodded too, and then turned toward — oh. Sune.

Louisahadn't even seen Sune standing there, but he'd clearly been watching, his narrow eyes flicking from Ulfarr, to Killik, to Louisa, and back again. What is amiss? he signed. Why do you all scent thus?

Therewas an instant's awkward silence, in which Ulfarr rubbed at his nose, and Louisa shot another searching glance toward Killik. Who sighed, and then squared his shoulders, and met Sune's eyes. "I only failed to tell them I was staying with you last eve," he replied, his voice carefully light. "But now they know, and we three shall speak more together later, ach? After this OpenHouse is done."

Sune'sexpression relaxed again, and Ulfarr's stiff body softened, too. And something leapt, bright and hopeful in Louisa's belly, because even if Killik had walked out like that last night, maybe — maybe he'd actually listened to her, after all. Maybe he'd just needed time and space to think about it. And if he really wanted to talk more about it later, maybe — maybe he was finally going to be honest with Ulfarr, too.

Whichmeant — they could still fix this. They could. Theywould.

"That sounds good," Louisa said firmly, with a wavering, hopeful smile toward Killik's face. "Thank you, Killik."

Henodded back, though his eyes didn't quite meet hers. And as Louisa blinked toward him, suddenly there was the awareness, the weight, of all those heavy, deeply betraying things she'd told him the night before. I love you. I need you. I will never, ever get over you.

Itflushed hot in her face, dropped her eyes to the mossy earth at her feet, while Killik cleared his throat. "We ought to eat, and set to work," he said. "This day carries great weight, and has the power to alter much for us."

Right. Yes. It was a critically important day, and it was vital that they carry it off. AndLouisa sank into the firm strength of Ulfarr's hand on her shoulder, guiding her closer, together with Killik and Sune. And once they were all clustered together in a ring, Ulfarr said a heartfelt prayer to Skai-kesh, asking for his blessing, and his guidance, and his safety.

Andthough he didn't speak it, Louisa could again feel Ulfarr's longing, his desperate hope. His need to earn this, to show this, to gain his clan's forgiveness. To gain this as his home.

Andwhen they drew apart again, there was only determination, low and powerful in Louisa's belly. They would do this. They would gain this, together. As a clan, and maybe even as… a family.

Andyes, it was there in Killik's eyes too, and in Sune's. They were Skai. They were family. They were home.

"Then let's go," Louisa said, making the sign for victory. "And put on a damn good show."