38. What Kind of a Psycho Wears a Hat?

She beamed, her glittering radiance making my heart sing. "Oh, yes." She pulled a tiny gold band from her finger. "Take this in exchange for the ring you have offered me. With it, you will be able to find your way back into Faerie so that we may speak again."

It was a thin gold band, etched with symbols that sparkled in the sunlight. Her hands were far more delicate than my own, so I slid the ring onto my pinky.

"And I expect an invitation to the wedding."

Sound returned. I hadn't noticed its absence, but when the queen moved away from me, it was like a cone of silence had been lifted. Had the crowd seen us talking, the ring? I thought not, as Maggie, Grim, and Liam's guards were just now dropping their hands from the hilts of their swords. She'd given us a moment out of time to talk.

"You may go now," she said as she walked up the steps into her palace. "I give you safe passage. You will take care of this threat before I decide to do it myself."

I stood and bowed with her people. "Thank you. We will."

The journey back to the tree was delightfully uneventful. The queen had promised safe passage and none of the fae chanced her displeasure. Even that evil sentinel we'd encountered on the way in was absent on our walk back.

"Whyarewegoingbacktothetree?" Pippin chirped.

"Because Sam said she knew a way through. Now shut up about it. The question's been asked and answered twice." Maggie's patience was running thin.

We were all a little shaky. Clearly, I wasn't the only one who'd thought they weren't getting out of Faerie alive.

When we returned to the tree, we circled the massive trunk to the back, where Pippin thought there was a veil between the realms. "I have no idea if this will work, but just to be on the safe side, everyone hold hands." At their confused looks, I added, "In a chain. Pippin, hold my ear." I held out my left hand to Maggie. The queen's ring was on my right and I wanted to lead with that hand.

Once Liam and Grim had joined the chain, I touched the trunk where Pippin had indicated. The bark shimmered a moment and then the mirror appeared. Stepping back through the looking glass, I held tight to Maggie. Everyone had to make it back with me.

A moment later, the five of us were standing in The Wicche Glass Tavern. Pippin whooped and jumped off my shoulder, racing out of the dark tavern.

"Thank you so much for coming with me."

"Eh, I told you. We got paid." Maggie picked up her phone. She'd left it sitting on the bar. Tapping the screen, she said, "Two days." She glanced at Liam and Grim. "Far better than we were expecting."

"I'd thought a month, at least," Grim grumbled.

"Aye." Maggie grinned. "At the very least. So," she said, tapping on the screen again, "it's almost dead but there should be enough to call for a pickup."

While Maggie called Dave, I went behind the bar to see if there was anything left after Abigail and her demon had trashed the place. The bottles had been smashed, but the tap lines seemed to still be working. I found a mug in a cabinet and poured Grim a mead, sliding it down to the end of the bar that had no stools. He reached up, snatched the mug, and downed it in one. He drank the refill a little more slowly.

I went through the bar refrigerator and found a bottle of champagne. Our continued existence seemed reason for celebrating. I popped the cork and filled a chipped coffee cup, a dented tumbler, and a shot glass for Liam, Maggie, and myself. The three of us clinked containers—Grim couldn't be bothered—and we downed ours, as well.

On our second cup, Grim's third, heavy footsteps crossed the courtyard outside. Dave's muscular frame filled the doorway. When he stalked across the bar, eyes intent on Maggie, I had to look away. A moment later, she was in his arms as he continued to walk her back into the hall, out of sight. I poured Liam and me another cup, assuming we had some time.

Later, when Dave dropped me off in front of the nocturne, it was well past midnight. This was prime vamp time, but the place felt empty. There was only one guard at the gate, who reluctantly opened it after glaring at me for five full seconds. Asshole.

Walking through the front door, I reached out for Clive but didn't find him. I did, however, find Godfrey. He was sitting in Clive's study, his feet on the desk, playing on his phone.

"And Amélie really thought you wanted your own city." I shook my head as I walked in, remembering the ploy used in New Orleans to get Godfrey to betray Clive.

Godfrey grinned and popped up. "Thank God. It's been a yawn around here since you've been gone, and his highness has been in a right foul mood." He surprised me by pulling me into a hug. "How are you back so soon? Clive thought you likely gone for weeks."

"The queen took pity on me and gave us access to a shortcut." I dropped my pack and then remembered the delicate carving I was supposed to give Gloriana. Dropping to my knees, I unzipped the backpack, burrowing into soft tees, looking for the jade gift. I pulled out the cloth I'd wrapped it in, but it was empty. Something fluttered to the carpet. It was a folded note on white linen parchment. It read, It's lovely. Thank you.

Shaking my head, I pocketed the note. It's not every day Faerie herself gives you a thank you card. "So where are Clive and Russell?"

"Your engagement party."

"That's tonight?" I grabbed my bag and ran toward the door.

"Oh, sunshine," Godfrey called.

Skidding to a stop in the hall, I ducked my head back in.

"You're already there, remember?" Eyebrows raised, he leaned back on the desk and waited for me to find a solution.

"It's a masquerade party, right?" At his nod, I continued, "So I get all gussied up, wear a mask, slip in, and take over. We can pretend I'm a dick and needed to do a costume change."

"Pretend?" He tilted his head, considering.

"Ha ha. So who's playing me?" I hadn't thought to ask before.

"As you're the only werewolf-wicche around, we had to improvise. Medusa thought it would be a kick, so…" He shrugged. "She's wearing your clothes and is sticking close to Clive to muddle scents. Let's face it: Most have no idea what a gorgon smells like, so we thought it might work. Of course, there's a better than good chance the entire supernatural community thinks you're an unmitigated lush by this point."

Great. "But she's shorter and more built than me." We weren't the same body type at all.

"Eh. High heels, the right kind of dress, hat, mask."

"Hat?"

"Her hair's black."

"I'm walking around the party in a hat drinking straight from the bottle, aren't I? Jeez," I muttered. "Clive's marrying a real asshole." I started to leave again and then stopped. "You can drive me, right?"

He shook his head. "Sorry, love. I'm guarding the nocturne tonight."

"So I'm jogging in heels and an evening gown?" The euphoria of a minute ago was well and truly gone.

"I can have someone drive you."

"Hard pass. Your guys will wrap the car around a tree in the hopes of killing me. No thanks." I guessed I could hold the heels and jog over in running shoes. I'd still look stupid, but what choice did I have? I'd promised Dave I wouldn't drive alone. I couldn't wait to get my license and go anywhere I wanted.

"Audrey would never let anything happen to you."

Audrey? I hadn't thought of her. "Yes, please."

"Good." He nodded, tapping the screen of his phone. "You go get ready and Audrey will be waiting out front for you."

"Thank you!" I shouted, running down the hall. I raced up the steps, dumped my stuff in my bedroom, and then dove into the shower.

Wrapped in a towel, I went to the closet. Medusa had made a mess of the place. Discarded gowns were lying on the floor. What the hell? Who does that? I hung them back up and then looked for anything that wasn't horribly wrinkled.

There was one in the corner, still in a garment bag. I unzipped it and almost gasped. It was a deep indigo that turned to eggplant as it moved in the light. Long, slinky, it slid along my fingers like liquid. I was hesitant to touch it, let alone put it on. I pulled it out of the bag and hung it up beside the mirror. Stunning.

I found a box with heels the same hue. Knowing I'd need to do a lot of work to do this dress justice, I got to it. Buffing, polishing, moisturizing, blowing dry, brushing out, I used the good hair stuff Owen had recommended. Consequently, my brown hair now showed highlights of gold and red. It was glossy, with a bit of a wave. I wore it long, having no idea how to do a complicated updo.

Wait! I knew someone who could. I called Godfrey and asked if he could send Audrey up. While I waited, I did my best with makeup. My expertise tapped out at mascara and lipstick, though. When there was a knock at the door, I was in the dress. Closing my eyes, I checked first. No need to let in a bad guy. It was Audrey.

She did gasp. "Oh, miss. You're pretty as a picture."

Grinning, I spun. The form-fitting column flared at the bottom. "Isn't it beautiful?"

"Aye. That fabric." She reached out to touch and then stopped herself, no doubt remembering I was the Master's fiancé. "Sorry, miss."

I held out my arm for her to feel the soft, shimmering fabric. "I have no idea what it is, but I'm having a hard time not staring at it, myself." Moving out of the doorway, I waved her in. "I hoped you'd be willing to do me a favor."

"Anything, miss." Audrey almost stopped herself from bobbing in a quick curtsy. Almost.

"Could you make my hair look as good as this dress?"

Smiling shyly, she said, "I've been itching to get my hands in your hair for quite some time. Now," she said, ushering me to my own vanity, "we need a style that matches this gown. Sit." She ran her hands through my hair, thinking. "The streak is natural?"

"Yeah. Long story." Grimacing, I added, "Sorry. I only have rubber hair ties." I opened the drawer to show her a pile of colorful bands.

She waved that idea away, closing the drawer and pulling a thin case from her pocket. "I always have my hair things with me, miss."

Not wanting to bug her, I sat straight and kept my mouth shut.

After a few minutes of Audrey playing with my hair, she said, "I've an idea."

"Great. You do whatever you want back there." How odd it must have been to have had a ladies' maid, hovering and fussing all the time. Of course, it was darn handy right now.

Sooner than I would have thought possible, she had loosely braided my hair like a headband and then pulled up the weighty mass into a curly, messy bun. I assumed she was going to do one of those sleek chignon styles that Benvair preferred, but she went the other way.

"Your hair should complement the dress, miss, but all of it needs to complement you. You're not a cold, sophisticated person. The loose, sexy bun is you. This isn't a costume. This is fun, sexy Sam, all dressed up." She patted my shoulder. "Trust me, miss."

"I do. Completely." She was right. About all of it. I looked like me, just gussied up.

"What jewelry are you going to wear?"

I pointed to the box on the shelf to my left. She pulled it down and opened the top. It was embarrassing. Every time I turned around, there were new pieces. In fact, that wasn't even the same box. This one was bigger.

Audrey closed the box as quickly as she'd opened it and continued to look on the shelves.

"So, no?" I was confused.

"That was everyday jewelry. We're looking for the good pieces."

I thought those were all really good pieces.

She opened a drawer and nodded. "Here we are." Opening and closing thin cases, she finally said, "These, miss." She handed me square opal earrings, surrounded by triangular diamonds. They matched the dress and the ring I'd given the Faerie Queen.

The dragon pendant was thin and rested against my chest under the neckline. The wicche glass hung between my breasts, so neither was visible. "Do I need a necklace, or are the earrings good?"

Audrey started to roll her eyes and then caught herself. "The questions you ask, miss." She drew out a diamond choker. My stomach dropped at the thought of wearing something so expensive. Exquisite, the necklace looked like an Art Deco masterpiece. Audrey slipped it around my neck, and it sat right over the neckline of the dress. Perfect.

"The clasp is strong, right? It's not going to fall off and get lost?"

"No, miss." She touched up my makeup. A few strokes and my face was as dressed up as the rest of me. Glancing around the dressing room portion of the closet, she said, "You need an evening bag." Opening another drawer, she found an array. She chose two and offered them to me. One was a beautiful, brushed silver and the other a fan of blues, greens, and purples like a peacock feather. I went with the peacock.

"I'll wait for you downstairs, miss." Audrey left and I studied myself in the mirror. It was a far cry from my baggy jeans, zombie tees, and braids, but I guessed this was me too. When I began to feel adrift, I remembered that Clive liked me best in running shoes and my racing heart settled. No one was trying to change me. Marriage to Clive didn't mean losing myself. I was still me, just more formally attired this evening.

Of course, if I'd realized then how the night would turn out, I'd have ditched the jewels for running shoes.