11. Catriona

11

CATRIONA

F elix is so obtuse, so completely daft. I'm sure he has no idea how a woman—how I —could misunderstand what he was saying.

Foolish heart, stop racing.

He wasn't confessing his love. He wasn't confessing anything.

But what about last night, when he said he didn't plan to annul the marriage? That he signed his name with forever in mind?

"Do you need anything else, Mrs. Ward?" Johann folds my purchases into a tidy paper parcel and ties them with a string. "I'll carry this to your shop if you like."

"Thank you, but I can manage," I say absently. He's been very kind, helping me find all I need, but my mind is on Felix.

And it shouldn't be— it shouldn't be .

I sharpen my gaze on Johann, looking for signs he might be less human than he appears. But that's not how it works. Werewolves don't have tells. You can't spot them from their strange eyes or twitchy movements.

My eyes move to his fingers. His nails are short, clean, and trim.

"How are you settling in?" The handsome shopkeeper leans against his wooden counter, either polite or hoping to keep the conversation going. "I heard Frida already gifted you with one of her creatures."

I lift my brows. "News travels fast in Braunwin."

He chuckles. "You have no idea."

We're alone, and the shop is empty. Someone could walk in at any time, but for now, I might as well take advantage of Johann's eagerness to chat.

"All right." I lean against the counter. "Tell me everything I need to know about Braunwin."

The handsome shopkeeper presses a hand to his chest, mock offended. "You want me to gossip about my neighbors?"

"Absolutely."

The man smiles, and it's a nice smile. Not Felix's smile, of course, but…nice. "Who do you want to know about?"

"Cyril."

Johann laughs. "Met him already?"

"He followed us home last night and stood on the street, staring at me."

"I'm afraid I don't know him well. I'm not sure anyone around here does."

"Does he have a family?"

"He lives alone up near the bluff, in the forest."

"What does he do for a living?"

"He's a tanner. He hunts and sells the hides he cures."

"To whom?"

"Bernice buys some of them for her shop. He takes the rest to Hellenford, I've heard. Every month or so, he loads up his stock into a wagon and takes off."

"How long has he lived here?"

Johann gives me a knowing smile. "You have very specific questions."

"I'm nosy by nature—just ask Felix."

"I don't know how long he's lived here, as I haven't been here that long myself."

I nod, wondering if I dare push for more.

"Go ahead," he says with a laugh. "Who else do you want to know about?"

I should ask about Jane, the widowed schoolteacher, but…I don't. "Tell me about Millie and Belinda. Are they locals?"

Johann nods. "Their father's an old drunk who owns Mountain Apple Farm, just to the east of town. The land's been in their family for generations, but the last I heard, Hubert took out a loan with a bank in Hellenford, and they're near on to losing the place. The girls work in town to pay the bills—Belinda more than Millie. Millie takes on odd jobs here and there, but she's more of a free spirit—like their mother, or so I've heard. Mrs. Abendroth was out of the picture long before I came to Braunwin."

Before I can ask anything else, the bell above the door rings. Arnold steps inside, a broad smile stretching across his face when he sees me. "Good morning to you, Mrs. Ward. Johann."

"Good morning," I say to the woodsman. "How are you faring today?"

"Quite well," he says jovially. "My Annika just got engaged. I came straight to Johann, knowing he'd be sure to spread the word."

Johann laughs good-naturedly, crossing his arms. "It seems I'm developing a reputation."

"Congratulations," I say, feeling slightly sick, memories of Lina too close to the surface. "Have I met her fiancé yet?"

"Not yet, no. He just returned from Hellenford on the coach this morning. I'll be sure to introduce you soon. In fact, tomorrow—yes, tomorrow. Why don't you and Felix join us for dinner? Bernice was just saying she'd like to get to know you better."

"Mrs. Ward has shown great interest in our village," Johann says, looking at me with a twinkle in his eyes. "I'm sure she would be delighted."

The shopkeeper thinks I'm a busybody, which is better than the villagers suspecting I'm a hunter. I flash him a warning look and then smile for Arnold. "I would be delighted, and I know Felix will be as well."

"It's a plan then."

I leave the two men to take care of their business, carrying my parcel out the door.

" Felix says you're married ," Greg says in my head when I step onto the street, making me grin.

"You're here," I respond, my heart a little lighter.

" And you're avoiding the question. "

"It's a long story, and I can't discuss it while I'm out in the open. People will think I'm mad if they see me talking to myself like this."

" Come visit me tonight. Felix knows where I am. "

"All right."

" But not too early. I'm going to feast on an apple-fed deer at sundown. "

"That sounds lovely. I hope you find a fat one." I pause. "One, Greg. Just one."

" Yes, fine ." Greg's presence leaves my head, and I walk to our shop next door, dragging my feet because I'm a coward. I'd rather fight a werewolf than face Felix.

I walk into the shop and find my new husband staring intently at the shelf he just stocked. He glances over his shoulder. "Greg's here."

"I know. We're supposed to go see him tonight."

"No better time to wander than after dark."

"Scared?" I ask.

"No."

"You should be."

He flashes me a look. "You already said you'd keep me safe."

"We all say things." I walk past him, heading up the stairs to our apartment. "That doesn't mean we mean them."

I pass through the doorway, almost to the kitchen, when Felix catches my arm and turns me. "What does that mean?"

His hand is warm on my bare skin, his hold firm but not painful.

"Let go of me," I say, exasperated. "Of course I won't leave you for dead."

He releases me, but he doesn't give me space. "That's not what you were referring to."

"Felix, I don't want to do this."

"But I do." He takes the package from my hands and sets it on the workbench. Then his voice deepens as he says, "I very much do."

My chest grows warm. "You want to do what?"

His blue eyes slide to my lips. Then they move back up, his gaze intent on mine. It's uncomfortable, this scrutiny. Solemn Felix is infinitely more unnerving than Smiling Felix.

He tilts his head to the side. "What would you do if I kissed you, bluebird?"

My reaction to the unexpected question is sharp and foreign. It's a violent clenching in my stomach, a wild fluttering in my chest. "It's inappropriate for us to discuss such things while on a job."

But that only amuses him. He smiles for half a moment and then goes solemn again. "And yet…inappropriate sounds rather appealing, doesn't it?"

"We're not doing this," I whisper.

He steps in, his hand touching the small of my back, the tips of his fingers warm. "You have been kissed, haven't you?"

"Yes." I swallow before I admit, "But…it's been awhile."

"Why?"

My eyes dart over his face, catching on his lips. And then I rip them to the flowers on the kitchen workbench. "I haven't found anyone I like enough to kiss."

"So, it's not just that all the men in your life are so intimidated by you they haven't approached you—you've never liked anyone?"

"There is…someone." My heart picks up its pace, surprised by my own daring.

His hand flattens on my back, his eyes darkening. "Tell me about him."

I open my mouth only to realize I'm not as brave as I'd hoped.

"Is he handsome?" Felix presses, undaunted by my hesitation.

"Yes."

"Does he make your heart race when the two of you are close?" He steps in.

"Yes…"

He suddenly scowls. "It's not Atticus, is it? Because if it is, I really don't want to know."

I laugh, incredulous. "No."

"Ambrose?"

"No."

"Dirk?"

"You're just listing random hunters now."

He meets my gaze again, his eyes betraying something vulnerable in their depths. "I'm trying to let myself down gently, just in case it's not me."

"Felix," I snap.

"Yes?"

"Don't be an idiot. Of course it's you."

He inhales sharply, the sound of it like fire to dry kindling in my stomach. Then, entranced, he catches my face with his hands, cupping either side of my jaw and brushing his fingers over my neck. Closing my eyes, I wait for his lips to touch mine.

I clutch his arm as he draws close, twisting my fingers in the fabric of his sleeve—knowing I should push him back but pulling him closer instead.

Felix's breath feathers over my lips just before he groans and tilts his head back. "You almost had me, bluebird."

My eyes flutter open. " What? "

He releases me, rolling his shoulders . "I almost kissed you. I almost lost ."

It takes me several seconds to realize what he's referring to. "Come back."

He lifts his light brown brows playfully. "Are you waving the flag of surrender?"

"No, I'm going to smack you for being such a?—"

"Ask me to kiss you." He smiles, still teasing, his eyes warm.

"You lost your chance." I walk past him, brushing away his hand when he reaches for me, trying not to smile.

He follows me into the bedroom, chuckling. "Put us both out of our misery."

"No."

He catches me around the waist, resisting my struggling as he nuzzles the side of my neck. The sensation of his lips on my skin is so foreign, so welcome .

I draw in an unsteady breath, going perfectly still.

"I meant what I said earlier." His lips graze over me as he holds me close. "I agreed to training because of you. I agreed to the apprenticeship because of you. You are not just a welcome distraction, nor a pleasant perk of the job. You are the reason I get up in the morning."

All the air leaves my lungs.

"And one day, when you do finally ask me to kiss you, I will do it so well, so thoroughly, you will never doubt my sincerity again."

And then his arms and mouth are gone. I stand here, breathing hard, as Felix's footfalls echo in the shop as he walks down the stairs.