Chapter 48

48

Knox

I watch her closely as I say the words and am rewarded by her eyes widening in surprise. But she also looks wary. I frown. Not the response I expected.

"I love you, my June. I think I knew I would the moment I saw you. I knew, subconsciously, that I loved you when I proposed to you. It's why I couldn't go through with the arrangement Arthur had proposed. I knew it when I placed my grandmothers' ring on your finger. I was sure about it when I consummated our wedding. And I was sure about it, when I saw you stumble at your birth mother's place earlier. When her dog lunged toward you, and you slipped? I swear, my heart almost punched out of my chest."

Understanding comes into her eyes. "How did you get behind me so quickly? You were at the car, and then?—"

"My feet didn't touch the ground." I half laugh. "I know you wanted to go in there on your own. And I know I agreed. But my instinct—that side of me I can't switch off from having been a Marine—couldn't relax." I firm my lips. "I didn't take my gaze off of you as you walked toward the house. And when I saw the dog barking and straining to break free—" I shake my head. "My instincts screamed at me to move closer to you. So, when Bruno jumped toward you, I was halfway up the path to the door. I raced forward. The next thing I knew, I was standing behind you. And not a second too late." I shudder.

"If anything had happened to you, baby, I never would've forgiven myself. I was already berating myself for having brought you there without preparing you more. And then, you wanted to meet her alone, and I agreed. And I just knew, while I respected your decision, I also wanted to be there with you. So, I followed my instinct, and thank god for that."

She stays silent and my heart begins to race. Why isn't she responding? Why isn't she saying something. Does she not believe me? "June?" I search her features. "Talk to me baby. What is it?"

"Despite my telling you I could handle it; you decided you were going to accompany me in there?" She frowns.

I blow out a breath. "I do trust you, June. I do. And I was ready to let you go in there and deal with your devils on your own, but"—I shake my head—"call it a Marine's instinct. As you walked up that garden path, something in me insisted I prepare to follow you. And when I saw the way that dog was acting, I knew I had to move closer, just in case you needed me. And you did. If you hadn't started to fall, I would have stayed back. I'm not going to apologize for being there."

"You won't?" The fold between her eyebrows deepens.

"I'll always do what's best for you, even if it means, sometimes, going against what you want." I peer into her face. "I'm sorry if that upsets you, but you need to trust my judgement too. I am your Master, and that means I'll do everything in my power to take care of you. I am duty-bound to keep you safe, and I'll do that, even at the cost of pissing you off."

She glances away. My heart sinks. I'm being honest with her. I'll never lie to her. "June, say something," I plead.

She hunches her shoulders. "I understand what you did, I suppose. And in the end, it worked out because you were there when I needed you most. You were right."

"I was?" Hope has a chokehold on my heart. Warmth floods my skin.

"As it turned out, I was so relieved to have you there. Your presence gave me the strength to face all of the images from my past that came flooding back. I couldn't have done it without you."

"I love you." I cup her cheek. "I do, July. I love you so much."

"You… You love me?" She swallows, as if hearing me for the first time.

I plant my hands on her hips and draw her closer. "I love you. I wish I'd had the balls to tell you so earlier, but I hope you' realize how much I mean it." I hold her gaze. "I want you with me, in my life, by my side, through thick and thin, for better or worse, through sickness and in health. Through all the ups and downs of life. I need you, July. Only you. It was always you. There's no one else but you."

"Oh, Knox. I have waited so long to hear those words from you."

I bend and kiss her forehead, then her eyelids, then her nose. I press my lips to hers and whisper, "I love you. I have loved you from the second I laid eyes on you. I had a sneaky feeling you were going to be my downfall. And when I realized how you had the gumption to challenge me, I knew you were going to be my undoing. I knew I was going to be powerless when it came to you. I knew I'd met my ruin, so I had to find a way to resist my emotions."

"Of course, you did," she says dryly.

"You're my kryptonite, baby. I knew you'd put a chink in my armor, and that would change my future forever." I half smile. "I also knew it was inevitable, but that didn't stop me from putting up a fight. And then what Ryott told me earlier?—"

"I knew there was a reason he was here," she says, almost triumphantly.

"There was. He came by to kick my arse into gear, and to tell me I needed to man up and tell you how I felt."

"He told you that?" she asks in wonder.

"Not that politely, but yeah, that was the gist of the conversation. But I have to say, even if he hadn't come by, I'd have told you my feelings. What he said simply confirmed to me that I was doing the right thing. I knew I couldn't wait any longer. I knew I had to do it right now."

I bend and push my forehead into hers.

"I love you, July. I'll never stop loving you. I promise to take care of you, and look after you, and protect you. I promise to always keep you happy. When I say I want to spend my life with you, I'm serious. I want to be with you, July. I want to wake up next to you and fall asleep with you in my arms. I want to wipe your tears and see you smile and do everything in my power to keep you happy. I love you. I love you. I love you." I swallow. "And I can't imagine anything better than breathing the same air as you." I take in her features and sweat pools in my armpits. Shit. Why isn't she saying anything? "July?" I narrow my gaze. "Say something."

She stays quiet a few seconds more, then a big smile curves her lips. "I feel the same way."