Chapter 19

I left Lily in bed, warm and sated, and somehow managed to drag myself out of the hotel and away from her.

As I had promised, I stopped first by the floral shop and made up a sign to hang on the front door, letting everyone know that Lily would be working at Briarleigh today. It was a small town, and I was certain they would find her if they needed her.

That was one nice thing about villages; the residents were far more forgiving when a business had to close. The owners were friends and family members, and customers understood when things came up.

Once I had checked to make sure that everything was okay around the shop, I let myself out the back door, the same way I'd entered. Though I scouted the parking lot and surrounding areas on the way in, I'd seen no sign of the man from yesterday. I continued to keep an eye out as I made my way around the building on foot, then began to walk along Main Street.

Rosie's Diner was situated across the street, and I made a split-second decision to stop in for breakfast. I wanted to be as visible as possible, and my plan was to hit every hotspot in the small town. I wanted Ara?a's men to know exactly where I was.

The small diner was packed, but I spotted an empty stool at the counter and slid onto it. Less than a minute later, a waitress materialized next to me, coffee carafe in hand. "Coffee?"

"Sure."

She grabbed a nearby cup and filled it, then slid it my way. "What can I get for you?"

"Whatever you recommend." I didn't bother to look at the menu; I wasn't picky.

The waitress gave a perfunctory nod. "You got it. Food will be up soon."

I sipped at the coffee, watching the patrons in my peripheral vision. My shoulder blades itched, and sitting here at the counter made me feel like I had a huge Bullseye painted on my back.

Strangely enough, I didn't get the feeling I was being watched. Over the years, I had developed a pretty keen sense of self preservation, and I knew when I was in danger. Although several of the locals threw curious glances my way, they weren't malicious.

Chatter filled the air, and though I kept one eye on my surroundings, I allowed my thoughts to drift back to Lily. I'd never met a woman quite like her. She was innocent yet seductive, beautiful but didn't know it. While she was reserved in her daily life, she was completely unrestrained in the bedroom. She came alive under my hands and mouth, pushing me to the edge of sanity.

I rubbed at my chest, which felt a little too tight. I'd first noticed the sensation during my drive into Pine Ridge. At the time, I had chalked it up to a heightened sense of awareness, but that didn't feel quite right. This was different. My body seemed more relaxed, my muscles less tense despite the slight ache in my lungs. I felt almost lighter somehow, and…

I realized with a start what was different. For the first time in longer than I could remember, I was smiling.

I immediately smoothed my expression, hoping no one had noticed. Although, really, why shouldn't I be smiling? I'd had a beautiful woman in my bed all night long, had spent hours pleasuring her and receiving pleasure in return.

I barely repressed a snort. While the sex certainly influenced my opinion, I could acknowledge that this feeling went far deeper than our skin-to-skin connection.

A plate slid across the counter in front of me, and my eyes widened at the heaping mountain of scrambled eggs, veggies, and sausage. "Anything else?"

The waitress looked at me expectantly, and I shook my head. "Looks great, thanks."

I dug in, the savory flavors exploding over my tongue. No wonder everyone seemed to rave about this place. It was the best food I'd had in a long time. I finished the meal, then paid with the cash I had borrowed from Lily.

A pang of guilt sliced through my heart as I threw the bills down on the counter. I hated that I didn't have access to my own funds at the moment—maybe not ever. Accessing my bank account was a sure way to throw up a red flag telling Fox exactly where I was.

Still, I would have to pay Lily back eventually. I owed her so much; she'd done so much for me that I would never be able to repay. Once I settled somewhere far away and got a job working under the table, I could send the funds back to her. It would be a pale comparison to being with her, but I wanted to know she would be taken care of.

The sensation in my chest shifted, morphing into something far more painful. I rubbed the space over my heart, forcing it to dissipate as I strolled out of the diner and onto the sidewalk.

I ambled down Main Street, checking out the shops, taking my time about it. I felt completely exposed, but that was my goal. I wanted to draw the men's attention to me while I was alone and Lily was safe back at the lodge.

After nearly an hour of window shopping, I headed back to the floral shop, then climbed in the car and headed to Lily's house. Everything seemed quiet as I pulled into the driveway and parked the car, leaving it in plain view of anyone who might drive by.

Palming the keys, I cautiously climbed the steps and unlocked the door. I eased it open, cocking my ears toward the interior of the house. For several moments I remained frozen in place, just waiting, but all was silent and still.

Knife in hand, I cleared each room, checked each window and door, then made my way out to the backyard. It was another sunny, beautiful day, and the birds chirped happily in the trees, the bees flitting from flower to flower.

I did a quick scan of the tree line, but nothing seemed out of place. I wandered toward Lily's greenhouse, drawing in a deep breath of the sweet scent from the succulent blooms. I walked the rows, studying the flowers.

I paused next to the brightly colored lilies and fingered a soft petal. They were beautiful and delicate, yet they demonstrated a strength that lay deep beneath the surface, just like Lily herself,.

Something had been different all afternoon, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. Until now.

Here, surrounded by her things, felt right. Like I fit here in Pine Ridge, in this house… in Lily's arms.

Each day with her was better than the last. It was as if my DNA had been altered somehow, like she was part of me. It was a terrifying notion, because it made me wish for more. It made me want to put down roots.

But for every reason I wanted to stay, there was a reason I couldn't. Besides my past, there was the issue of work. I didn't have a true identity, and putting my name on anything meant I could be traced. Lily deserved more than a lover who was little more than a ghost.

Regret tugged at my heart, and my feet felt heavy as I trudged back toward the house. Temporary consolation was all I could offer her.

In that moment, I hated what I'd become.