Chapter 11

After getting dressed, we settled onto the couch in my office.

"What does the black rose with the thorny stem mean?" Eva traced the tattoo on my right bicep.

Somehow her touch seemed to purge the darkness that had been embedded into that image like a massage removing the knots in a tight muscle.

At that moment I knew what could heal me on a physical level. Meeting Eva had slowly opened my heart to love, and that was the beginning of my internal path to recovery. I had wanted to move away from the dark past, but didn't know how until now. Love had propelled me forward.

"Hawthorne was an intelligent psycho. I don't know why he was obsessed with the black rose and thorns. All his captives had the same tattoo. It was his insignia. His way of making us his possession."

"What did he make you do?" Eva asked.

"Hawthorne ran an intricate business selling human organs. He made us clean them." My body shivered from the remembrance of the first time I had to clean a human heart. "He had his team deliver them. Two of his members worked at a funeral home. That's how they got rid of the bodies after the organs were taken. I heard them talking about burning them. Though we stayed in the underground bunker, there was an area with a small window. That's where I saw cars come and go and overheard their conversations." I looked at her, expecting her to shudder, but she looked angry.

"He's an evil man." She frowned. "I want to hurt him for hurting you and all the people he held captive. What a sick person. Did he die a horrible death?"

I smiled, warmth blooming in my chest. "He did."

"How?" She stared at me.

"A bomb exploded in his home."

She sighed. "Good. I hope he's suffering in hell right now, where he has to endure the pain of having someone extract his organs over and over again. Kind of like the myth of Prometheus who had to endure the suffering of having an eagle eat his liver every day for defying the Gods."

Amusement and pride stirred in me at this interesting woman. "I see you like Greek mythology."

"People were messed up back then too." She shrugged. "Did you . . ."

"Kill anyone?"

She nodded.

"Hawthorne didn't make us kill anyone. Not that I heard or saw. We were kids and he kept us confined. I'm sure he had his men help with the murders." Sharing this story with her had lifted an incredible weight from my shoulders. "He forced us to help him extract the organs from the dead bodies." I paused, unsure if I wanted to share more about myself with her. But she seemed strong and courageous, looking at me with so much trust. "But I killed someone after I escaped."

She sucked in a breath. "Who?"

"My father." I swallowed, releasing a sigh. "Though my mom had left him, he found out where she lived and battered her to the point where all her limbs were broken. The doctor couldn't save her. I ended his life that night. I saw the worst of humanity while being captive. I'd never held a human organ in my hands until then. It changes you. So killing my evil father wasn't as hard as it should have been. The rage from being imprisoned added to the grief of my mom's death poured out of me onto him."

I hadn't shared this much about that night with anyone. Not even my friends.

Eva placed a hand on my back, rubbing circles.

"He didn't deserve to live. And he only would have hurt someone else if I didn't stop him. If I'd been home, I would've been able to protect my mother. My mom was half his size. He was always an abusive man, but drugs and alcohol made him worse. My disappearance probably depressed her, and she died not knowing I was still alive."

Tears spilled from Eva's eyes. "I think your mother knows you love her and would've done everything you could to save her."

I hoped so. Eva was the second woman in my life to make me want to protect her with everything I had. I thumbed the tears away.

I didn't know why I asked, "Do you think I'm a bad person?"

"No." She cupped my face, and I leaned into it. "I think you protect those you love at all costs. That's admirable. I can only imagine the emotions you had to deal with. Sometimes we have to do what's right even if it seems wrong."

She had doubts that I was too old for her, but she had more wisdom than most people.

Offering me a warm smile, she asked, "So how did you end up with Hawthorne?"

"I was kidnapped with two other kids when I was thirteen, but he moved them elsewhere. I never saw them again."

"How many times did you try to escape?" She took my large hand in her small palm.

"Once." I paused, remembering what I'd seen from a kid who had been caught. Hawthorne dismembered him while I hid the supply closet with the door ajar. He had removed that kid's organ and placed it into a cooler. The fucker had been listening to classical music throughout the sick ordeal. But I didn't want to share this gruesome part with my perfect flower.

"Others had tried to escape, but ended up dying. If you escaped the bunker, you still had to deal with the traps he'd laid out around the property."

"How did you escape successfully?"

"Hawthorne trusted me because I complied with his demands. He sent me out of the bunker to his nearby house to retrieve supplies or drop off coolers for his men to pick up. Sometimes he made me do stupid chores at his home while his men worked in a room full of computers. He told me where the traps were hidden along the paths, so I avoided the bombs or an electrical wires that would've triggered my death." I gestured to my tattoos. "Before bed, I'd sketch down what I remembered on a napkin and hid it. It was an escape map. So these tattoos depict my survival—my freedom."

Eva stared at my tattoos, running her hands up and down my arm. "Etched in ink is your salvation. All of the designs and the colors are reflections of your life after the darkness. This is your soul etched into your arm." She met my eyes, and my heart skipped a beat.

How could she understand me like that? We hadn't known each other that long for her to see into my soul. No wonder I'd been attracted to her the moment I saw her.

"The art looks like a maze made from intricate vines. You made something dark and ugly into something hopeful and beautiful." She stopped at the dark rose. "Why didn't you remove this tattoo?"

I shrugged. "I thought about it, but I guess I wanted the reminder that I survived. So I created a story of my life around a dark chapter."

"You left some room between the rose and the maze." Eva's fingers heated my skin as she caressed the area without any tats.

I knew exactly what I wanted to go there now. A thrill rushed me through as I envisioned the art.

She kissed the black rose, and I gasped at the surprised gesture. It was like an angel kissing the face of the devil. It wasn't right—but somehow it was the perfect remedy. My body sighed as though the darkness from that tattoo escaped, as though it feared the angel's power.

My love had just chased the darkness away for me.

I banded my arms around her, hugging her tight. "Thank you."

She laughed. "For what?"

I drew back, studying her. "For being you. For caring. You have no idea the power you have over me."

She considered me. "It's what you do when you love someone."

My heart just exploded into confetti at the joy I felt. "Is that right?"

She nodded. "I had my doubts about us, but I can't help what I feel."

"Doubts?"

She told me about her concern regarding my wealth, what others would think, and how I might get bored of her.

"Baby, there's no one more important than you. Other than my friends, I don't have any family. You're it. The money isn't important. I've worked hard to establish myself as a successful man because I enjoy the luxury. Money allows me to do a lot of things. It gives me access to connections that could eliminate my enemies. This world is cruel, and money can help me fight it easily. It doesn't give me happiness the way you do, but it's required for a lot of things."

"But you're a billionaire and I'm just a boring regular person."

"I've waited for you all my life. How can a beautiful sunrise or sunset be boring? They're simple, but so powerful. Besides, I love you too." I ran a thumb over her bottom lip. I'm afraid you'll get bored of me."

"Impossible." Elation gleamed in her eyes followed by mischief. "Let me show you how fascinated I am with you."

She got on her knees, unzipped my jeans, and nudged me back onto the couch. Then she showed me exactly how much she loved me with her mouth and tongue.