Chapter 15

CHAPTER15

Adam had not meant to fall asleep, but after retreating to his study, he had not known what to do with himself. There had been no correspondence to write, all the ledgers and contracts and letters already dealt with from his townhouse in London, where he spent the majority of his time. Indeed, he had almost no personal effects at Stapleton Court at all, for he never stayed long.

Somehow, being caught napping by his wife was worse than if she had caught him doing something else. He felt as if he had regressed to childhood, waiting to be punished.

At least she likes what she sees.

He noted the blush on her cheeks as she tried to look anywhere but at his half-bare chest.

Clutching the blanket to his exposed skin, for the sake of her blushes, he turned his back and quickly buttoned up his shirt. Though if she thought he was going to put his waistcoat and tailcoat back on, she was woefully mistaken.

“What did you wish to discuss?” he asked, turning back around to face her.

She closed the study door but made no move to come nearer. Adam supposed it would take her a while to come to terms with the fact that they were allowed to be alone together.

“Would you like to sit?” he said, patting the empty spot beside him.

She shook her head. “No, thank you. I shall not be staying long.”

“At Stapleton Court or in this room?” He smiled, though his heart sunk, wondering if she might actually leave the manor if that was what she had come to say.

“That remains to be seen,” Nancy replied coolly. “I do not expect much from you, Adam, but I will have respect. Indeed, you once accused me of not being respectful, so I can only assume that you are either a hypocrite or you had a momentary lapse in integrity.”

Adam could not help smiling. “You are particularly beautiful when you are angry. Has anyone ever told you that?”

“Do not employ your games and trickeries, Adam! This is important, and you will not distract me!” she huffed, marching over to the study window and turning her back to him.

She could not have known that the fierce bronze light of sunset streaming in through the pane pierced through the delicate white muslin of her dress, revealing the secrets of the figure beneath. Adam tilted his head to one side, admiring the private view, his gaze truly respecting the hourglass curves of her waist and hips, and the shapeliness of her thighs and calves.

But it was the bare skin between the top of her dress and the bottom of her hairline that he could not look away from—the smooth, inviting flesh on the nape of her neck.

He licked his lips, wondering how hard she would punch him if he were to place a soft kiss on that spot. After all, he still wore the bruise from her last blow.

“Are you going to continue, or are you thoroughly distracted?” he teased, his throat tight as he fought to swallow his desire.

She glanced back over her shoulder, scowling. “You will not run off like a naughty schoolboy again,” she chided. “You will not leave me to find my own amusements in this huge place, nor will you leave it to the housekeeper to entertain me. I do not profess to know what your plan is for our future, but for the month of our honeymoon at least, we will eat our meals together, we will have honest and constant communication, and you will keep any mistresses an absolute secret from Society and the scandal sheets that your name has graced for a decade. Now that you are my husband, you will not embarrass me, not ever.”

The words poured out of her in a torrent, spoken in one breath. “Oh, and you will show me around the house, until such a time as I am comfortable here.”

“Is that all?” He smiled, lounging back as if her requests were as simple as breathing.

Her scowl became a glower. “Do not mock me, Adam, and do not pretend that you will find what I have asked easy.”

“Why should it not be easy?” he asked. “I confess, I came to my study because I did not know what to do with you.”

She turned around fully. “Excuse me? I am not an ornament that you must decide what to do with.”

“You are twisting my words, dear Nancy,” he said, softening his tone. “What I meant was, I did not know how to introduce Stapleton Court to you, nor you to it. You see, I have never brought anyone here before. Even in my younger years, no friend has ever crossed the threshold of this place, including Harry.”

Her expression shifted from annoyed to confused. “I find that impossible to believe.”

“Perhaps, but your disbelief does not make it untrue. You are the first ‘outsider’ who has set foot in this manor in decades,” he insisted, needing her to understand, to some degree, why he had abandoned her in the entrance hall. “I did not know where to begin, with regards to showing you around the house. Nor do I know how I shall tell my mother about you, though the irony is, she will be thrilled however I do it.”

Nancy edged toward the chair before his writing desk and perched upon it, half hidden by the high back. She stared down at the floor for a long while, as if searching the scuffs and chipped varnish for answers. All the while, Adam waited for her to speak again, but as the silence stretched between them, growing as unbearable as a stifling carriage on the hottest day of the year, he could not stay quiet a moment longer.

“As for your remark about mistresses,” he said, “you have no reason to concern yourself.”

She peered around the high back of the chair, one eyebrow raised. “I also find that impossible to believe, considering your reputation. Are you trying to tell me that you are a changed man overnight? You forget, I have heard that sort of thing before. Or rather my mother heard it from my father, time and time again, and it is only recently that he has meant it.”

“I did not say that,” Adam corrected, with an apologetic smile. “As you said yourself, I do not know what the plan is for our future, but as we are both here, we ought to discuss the terms of our union.”

Nancy blanched, looking away quickly. “We will not be sharing bedchambers if that is what you are referring to.”

“I was not, but I am pleased to hear that it has been weighing on your mind,” he half-teased, gaining a sharp glare for his efforts. Still, that would not stop him. “Was it the open shirt that made you think of it? I could remove it altogether if that might make you more comfortable with the arrangement. Or, you could remove it for me if you prefer.”

“That will not be part of the arrangement,” Nancy squeaked, withdrawing into her sheltered shell. A fieldmouse once more.

Adam chuckled. “Very well.”

“Very well?” She frowned. “It is as easy as that?”

He shrugged. “We are equal partners in this marriage business, my darling Nancy.” He paused for half a second, realizing that the terms of endearment had started to feel real, no longer jests for his amusement. “What I mean is, you have requests, and I have requests, and it would serve us both well if we were to respect one another’s wishes.”

“And what are your wishes?” she asked quietly, folding her hands in her lap.

“Let me give my answers to yours, first.” Adam tilted his head from side to side, loosening a knot in the back of his neck. “I agree, I shall not run from you again. If I do not know how to contend with something, I shall seek your opinion. I also agree not to leave you to find your own amusements, but I also cannot promise that I will be at your beck and call at all hours of the day. There will be some occasions where you willhave to find your own entertainment, but I doubt you shall have any trouble, for there are plenty of distractions here.”

“Like the gardens?”

He nodded, smiling. “Yes, if they are to your liking.”

“How could they be to anyone’s disliking?” She glanced out of the window, her skin catching the golden hue of the sinking sun, giving her fair hair a halo as the moon had done on the night they had met.

Adam’s breath caught in his throat, for he was certain he had never seen anyone lovelier. A true angel, right there in a devil’s study.

“As for your comments about the housekeeper, Mrs. Holloway has been with this family since I was a boy, and though she might seem severe at times, she will be your greatest friend, I am sure of it. My having a wife has been her fondest dream for years, and though she claims she does not read those ‘awful rags,’ I know that she has glimpsed a few and been crushed by the stories. So, you are already a heroine to her for achieving the improbable—making an honest man out of me.”

“Honest?” Nancy scoffed, looking back at him.

“Oh, dear Nancy, I am nothing if not honest. Too honest, at times. Indeed, I might have a reputation, but lying is not one of my shortcomings,” Adam told her. “For example, I was just thinking how beautiful you looked gazing out of the window just now with the sunset glow on your face. I have never seen anything or anyone more exquisite.”

Her mouth fell open, her eyes so wide he feared they might never blink again.

“I consent to us eating our meals together,” he went on, enjoying her bashfulness. “And I can promise that I will not embarrass you. I know the writers of the scandal sheets very well, and while I have not minded their wicked tales about me until now, they do owe me many, many favors. My name will not be seen among their tawdry gossip any longer, as far as I can help it. For though you might not believe me, I have the capacity to be discreet. If I did not… well, let us just say that there would be a thousand more stories about me.”

He watched her throat move as she swallowed.

“A… thousand?”

“Not all of the same ilk,” he assured her, feeling a strange spike of something unfamiliar in his chest—a cold blade of shame, twisting. He blinked at the sensation, putting a hand to his heart to try and rub away the uncomfortable feeling. “I drink too much, I enjoy too many parties, I gamble too much, and I have friends in all manner of circles. Circles that would be frowned upon by Society.”

She nodded slowly. “I see.”

“To conclude, I will not disrespect you or speak to you as if you are not my equal,” he said, his breath shallow. “I will show you around the house and ensure that you are comfortable here, though it is my hope that you might join me at the townhouse in London in the future. As friends, at the very least.”

She let out a long breath, her body relaxing. “I can accept all of that.”

“I am not done.” He paused. “I will not disrespect you or abandon you, but I cannot love you either. Do not hope for it. That is impossible.”

Nancy tilted up her chin in defiance, her beautiful face taking on a haughty expression. “As if I would hope for such a thing! Evidently, you are forgetting the circumstances of this marriage. I never desired you, never asked for this. Honestly, the gall of you. You must be so accustomed to ladies falling hopelessly in love with you, but you can take comfort in the fact that I shall never be one of them.”

“Excellent,” he replied stiffly, his chest clenching as though something—or someone—were tugging on his insides. “And that leads me rather nicely to my final point.”

“That was not it?”

“No.” He forced a smile. “Once our honeymoon has passed, you will be free to do as you please. Your life will be your own, to live as you see fit, as long as you remember to show the same discretion that I intend to show. I shall live my life in the same fashion, but, at least for now, please rest assured that there will be no one but you.”

She gripped the edge of the chair’s high back, almost shuffling right off the chair itself as she met his steady gaze. “What do you mean?”

“I will be a loyal husband for this month of our honeymoon,” he explained. “There will be no mistresses, no lovers, no paramours, no lady who could even catch my eye. I will see only you, be with only you, and care for only you.”

He did not know what he was saying or why he was saying it, but the words tumbled from his lips, and he was helpless to stop them. All he could do was hold Nancy’s gaze, watching a flurry of emotions shifting across her face—bewilderment, anxiety, something like pain, something devastatingly like hope, and everything in between.

Gradually, her expression slowed to a look of… nothingness. A blank look that he could not read.

“For a month,” she said, with a choking laugh. “Just do not forget my most pressing request.”

He arched an eyebrow. “Not to wander around half-clothed in your presence?”

“Well, that too,” she replied, fidgeting. “Indeed, it is related.”

He nodded, understanding. “You are safe from me, Nancy. I shall endeavor to behave myself.”

“I should hope so.” She stood up and walked to the door, allowing him an exemplary view of her shapely figure as her hips swayed from side to side. “Now, if you please, show me everything that Stapleton Court has to offer.”

Not everything. For you have forbidden it.

Indeed, he had a feeling that the next month would be the longest, most arduous, most frustrating month of his life.