Chapter 8

There are countless religions throughout the Sundered Realms. Whether pre-Sundering religions addressed the existence of demons –- even metaphorically –- varied, but the ability to summon or destroy a demon, let alone what a demon actually is, has never been the province of any particular one.

Maybe the Sundering is divine punishment for the decadence of humanity, or a challenge to prove our worth to the gods, or nothing to do with them at all. All I know is that if gods do exist, they're either not benevolent or not as powerful as many religious leaders would have their followers believe.

I won't worship any god that demands my sacrifice. I've had enough of that from humans to no longer believe it has anything but extrinsic value.

It still came as a blow when on their return, Vhannor informed her he couldn't be in charge of her martial training anymore and that Shry would take over that part of her education.

Liris knew their relationship had taken a turn, but for all his talk of trust, Liris hadn't really thought Vhannor would consider that one failure so complete he'd write her off entirely. But since that was how he wanted it, she treated him with chilly professionalism to match his own habitual demeanor as they worked out her new curriculum.

She'd mentally conflated needing to be his partner with the only way she could matter, and that was her one actual mistake. She respected him and wanted him to respect her, but she respected him less if one failure was enough to make him give up on her.

Vhannor might no longer consider her worthy of standing at his side, but she could still stay at the university and find other ways to matter. Just because the first way she'd found was the one she was certain she wanted didn't mean there couldn't be others. Maybe she couldn't choose to stop failing, but she could choose to keep trying.

Liris hadn't run away to be his partner. She'd run away to be herself. So she would, and if that wasn't good enough for him, then he wasn't good enough to equal her anyway.

She didn't want that to be true. Maybe someday she'd get used to being disappointed and it would stop bothering her so badly every time.

A knock at her door startled her from studying: it was Shry, in her customary all-black, absently twirling a knife.

Shry jerked her head at the enormous book and Liris' empty notepad. "Learning anything useful?"

"Magic likes circles," Liris said tonelessly. "Spells don't activate without an outline, so some form is needed to invoke magic. People have experimented with different shapes within and enclosing spells. Circles are always the most reliable, but other shapes can be more powerful in the right spell. Why? Who knows."

"So that's a no, then," Shry drawled. "Want to go punch things instead?"

"Gods yes."

Liris had been navigating the university for days now, and there was a clear difference walking with Shry. A few people glared or blatantly turned away, but no one said anything.

It was the way people carefully didn't look at her and edged away, a tension that crept in. Like they knew on some level there was a predator in their midst.

So it was just as noticeable when they reached the university sparring center and that tension evaporated. Shry casually reserved a mat for them and commented on other practitioners they passed. They must be at ease with her because she clearly spent a lot of time here.

As they started sparring, Liris revised that: the people who watched her here also understood that Shry was in complete control.

Shry ran her through the moves Liris had been trained on and tested her with new ones. Shry reacted perfectly to every blow, and her hits used precise amounts of force.

When they'd first met on the road, if Liris had surprised Shry by fighting at all she might have managed a single strike.

It was fast becoming clear that despite her training, that was it.

"Not bad," Shry said.

Given how this session had gone so far, Liris frowned. "In what way?"

"Your defense basics are solid, you're in good shape, and you don't hesitate," Shry said. "Your training emphasized resourcefulness—repurposing parts of your environment or momentum—so you're at a disadvantage in this situation. Also in a sustained fight where your goal isn't to get away."

Liris stretched, keeping her muscles loose. "Yes, I think they have a special unit for ambassadors they expect to need training as assassins, but the foundation of our training was to escape."

"Admittedly also useful for an assassin," Shry acknowledged, without any apparent concern over the idea of Serenthuar employing ambassadors that way. "We're going to take what you know and gear it more offensively. And, well. Usefully."

"You know this style?" Liris asked, surprised. "Wait. Do you know all styles?"

"I'm not a master of every martial art, but I can fight any of them, if that's what you mean." Shry shrugged. "I had to study how humans move to learn how to blend in."

And how they'd fight.

Liris paused. "So how does a demon move? What do I need to know?"

Shry looked at her consideringly and then moved so fast it was like she vanished.

But she didn't, because Liris barely managed to see her striking at each of the places she was most sore.

"That's the first thing," Shry said in a cold voice.

"That demons are impossibly fast?" Liris managed. "I knew that."

This time Liris didn't see her. Her knees buckled.

"That they hate you," Shry said. "They will take any petty opportunity to make you suffer."

"Okay, all demons are terrible, especially you who volunteered to let me live in your house," Liris gasped.

"Right. I just wanted to be clear on that, since we haven't talked much. You know, shared a meal in the kitchen. Even though we live in the same house."

Liris blinked. "Do you eat in the kitchen?"

"I could. People do." Shry paused. "You didn't know that. I should've guessed. My bad."

Oh good, just what Liris didn't want to think about. "Can we spar again now?"

"Absolutely," Shry said, promptly launching into another attack with her unreal speed. This time at least Liris was ready enough to literally see it.

"I thought demons just wanted to devour," she said.

"That's correct. But as I'm evidence of, they have secondary goals in service to the first."

"A means to an end," Liris murmured. Then tensed, worried she'd offended Shry, but the half-demon just nodded while launching a kick at an impossible angle.

Right: demons weren't constrained by human physiology.

"They hate you because you can wield magic against them, when otherwise nothing a human can do makes them feel pain," Shry said. "Demons can eat ambient magic because it's not concentrated, but a node is too powerful for them to approach. To devour the world, they need to completely sunder it. So they take any opportunity to sow chaos here."

Every part of the world that was lost during the Sundering had been eaten by demons. Liris remembered the shadowy darkness and imagined it enveloping a whole realm, snuffing it out.

But she also imagined something more troubling. "Can demons shapeshift?"

"Obviously," Shry said, gesturing to encompass her body. "You uh. Do know where babies come from, right?"

Liris winced at having missed that, an opportunity Shry took to land a light punch.

Just because she couldn't see an opponent didn't mean they couldn't hit her.

"But not for long at a time, unless they're really powerful," Shry added, "and in that case they can't hide their devouring of magic. There's a balance. Also they have difficulty mimicking humanity, but the longer demons are exposed to humans, the smarter they get. Some people believe that could ultimately change demons' nature fundamentally."

Liris frowned, not surprised Shry took that moment to execute a series of flips and come back at her from above—demonstrating another expectation Liris needed to break:

Demons, like magic, weren't limited to three dimensions, let alone gravity. An attack could come from any direction.

"You disagree, I take it," Liris said.

"Completely."

Her expression wasn't angry—just utterly serious.

Liris nodded. "Okay."

Shry relaxed fractionally when Liris didn't doubt her or argue with her as she'd clearly expected, but Liris still didn't manage to land a hit. "You'll meet people who want to work with demons."

"That I know," Liris said, dodging a flurry only partially successfully—but better than she had earlier. Shry was mostly using moves she'd already demonstrated in at least a basic way, iterating and speeding up as Liris improved. "Some people think demons are gods, since they're provable supremely powerful beings. Some are a death cult that believe people need to be wiped out before the world can be reborn with a clean slate."

Shry changed the pace, dancing around Liris so she had to try to be aware of everywhere at once. "There are more than that. Some people believe allowing demons in won't actually destroy the world. They're stupid, but not generally motivated. Then there are the people who believe the paths between the realms aren't what's holding them together, but what's keeping them apart."

Liris froze, and Shry swept both her feet out from under her. She landed on her back with a thud.

"They believe the realms can be recombined?" she wheezed.

Shry nodded. "Those are the most dangerous, because they're the ones who can convince other reasonable people to join them."

Once upon a time, he thought he was going to save the world, Vhannor had said.

"Jadrhun?" Liris asked.

"Vhann wants him to be too smart for that," Shry said. "The thing he forgets is that sometimes smart people are the absolute stupidest. Don't you be one of them."

She reached down and offered a hand, and Liris took it without hesitation.

"‘Working together' goes against demons' nature," Shry said seriously. "It's the only reason we're all still here."

Terrifying thought.

"Did you know that?" Liris asked. "Growing up?"

"Oh, yeah," Shry said. "I knew a lot more about demons than about humans."

"Including eating traditions?"

"Especially those," Shry said dryly. "Only reason I know more than you now, to whatever extent I do, is because Vhann rescued me when I was younger."

Liris latched onto that. "But he works with you now?"

Shry snorted. "This I can't help you with. Keep stretching to wind down and we'll take a break."

Oh good. ‘Break' wasn't ‘done for the day', but Liris would take it.

"I was a teen and he wasn't much older," Shry said. "I needed to escape, and he needed my help, and let's just say we dealt a lot of death that day. When he brought me to Embhullor, he promised I'd never be bored and that I could do whatever I wanted, which, let me tell you: big change."

"I can relate to that much," Liris said.

"The trouble for Vhannor is that what I want to do still involves demons and killing, and he secretly worries that he messed up and made me feel like I had to stay with him and be a demon killer."

Liris stared at her incredulously. "What else does he think you'd be doing?"

"Thank you, that's what I say! Hunting demons: extremely my thing. Unfortunately he just thinks I'm loyal to him because I don't believe I have other options, and he is desperate to not do the same thing to anyone else. So I can't help you figure out how to convince him he should treat you like an equal and not someone he has to protect from his decisions, because I've never managed it."

So much for that. But that... did put things in context.

Well, maybe Vhannor wouldn't ever let himself look at her as more than a dependent, but maybe she and Shry could be on more even footing?

"I think Vhannor mentioned there was an artificial hot spring in town," Liris said. "I know we're not done yet, but maybe afterward we could... go together? Since I'm sure I'll be sore?"

Shry blinked, taken aback. And then her expression closed down, and she took a step back. "Yes, go if you think it'll help you be ready for tomorrow."

So, that was a no then.

Fine. Forget relationships. Liris was happy to focus on punching.

When Shry knocked on her door a few mornings later, Liris called, "Sorry, can't spar now, I have class."

There was a brief pause, and Liris wondered if Shry had forgotten they were scheduled for that afternoon until—

"It's Vhannor," the man in question said. "I've finished making arrangements for your first official mission. If you still want to go."

Liris threw open the door.

It was the first time she'd seen him in days, and it was like her entire being tightened in response to his mere presence. She barely stopped herself from glaring askance at her own body, which surely was overreacting.

"What mission?" she asked.

Vhannor watched her expressionlessly. "Otaryl. Have you forgotten?"

One of the realms Princess Nysia suspected of working against the CTR.

Liris' hands fisted at her side at the detached judgment she was picking up from him.

"I don't forget," she said. "I didn't realize you were still planning on taking me."

"I said it would take time to set everything up, between arranging a diplomatic visit and putting your paperwork through. This is for you." Vhannor held out a card to her carelessly. "It's a special license permitting you to perform spellwork in the field with a qualified supervisor until you have a chance to pass the normal tests. That's the one part of your work I'll still be personally overseeing, since no one else can."

All at once Liris couldn't get enough air, like Shry had punched her in the gut. "You... did this? For me?"

He scowled. Finally, an actual expression. "Did you think we were all lying to you this whole time? I don't expect demon portals on this one, but if you're serious about being my partner, I need to see you in a diplomatic setting before the ball so I know how to work with you."

"I am serious," Liris said. "But... after what happened in Thous, I didn't think—"

"That you would still be trusted to go as my partner? Ah."

That you ever wanted me as a partner.

Before she decided how to respond Vhannor continued ironically, "Actually, that incident convinced Nysia you're not a plant, which motivated her to work with Lady Inealuwor on finishing oversight processes for me as well. To be double-crossing this many directions at once you'd need more experience than she believes you have, and she doesn't think you're stupid enough to have tried that on purpose."

"That's... good?" Liris shook her head. "Then why did you think I wouldn't want to go?"

Vhannor's eyes narrowed, and Liris was suddenly aware they were still standing on opposite sides of a doorway.

"You stopped talking to me," he said.

What? "You stopped training me."

He frowned. "I was still here."

"You stopped training me right after Thous," Liris clarified. "I thought you didn't think I could be your partner after all and just weren't going to tell me so explicitly."

Like Serenthuar.

Which, she suddenly realized, made very little sense, because Vhannor had not otherwise behaved like Serenthuar in almost any way.

Vhannor banged his head against the door frame.

Liris paused. So she'd driven him to that already, huh.

"Void it," he muttered. "You were also here, and at any point I could have asked. I just—"

"—didn't want to push." Liris nodded, her conversation with Shry helping her fill in the blanks.

"Yes." Vhannor shifted his weight. "So now you understand?"

"I think so," Liris said. "But if I'm supposed to be your partner, but you're thinking of me like another little sister—"

"What?"

Did he not realize how he treated all his rescues? Everyone else seemed to. "Shry told me you rescued her and brought her here too."

"Shry was twelve," Vhannor said with some asperity. "You're an adult, and I have noticed."

"So? You couldn't have an adult sister? Shry isn't that much older than me."

Vhannor pinched the bridge of his nose. "Can I come in for a moment, please?"

They weren't fighting anymore exactly, so that was fine. "Sure."

Or maybe it wasn't fine, because the whole room felt smaller with him in it. He didn't take up that much space, but it was his presence—

No, it wasn't even that, was it? It was just that she felt keyed to him, like his presence brought him into focus and cast the rest of the room into the background.

Liris motioned him toward the bed while she went to take the chair until Vhannor shook his head and said firmly, "Definitely not."

She wasn't mistaken on Isendhor's etiquette: offering the nicer piece of furniture should have been expected. But she followed his lead and switched places. "The bed's more comfortable. I thought you'd stayed here before?"

"I have, and that is not the point," he grumbled, then scowled again. "Or maybe it is. Why did you think my thinking of you as a sister would matter?"

"You've been very clear that you don't want me to feel like you're constraining my options," Liris said. "You've now even gone to the trouble of arranging external reviews of your behavior to make sure you're not cornering me."

Vhannor winced and ran a hand through his hair. "Well, that much is true."

He didn't say anything else immediately—notably anything about why thinking of her as a sister struck him as ridiculous.

Liris employed her vast powers of deduction and ventured, "I also didn't want you to think of me as a sister, so I'm glad you're claiming you don't."

"I emphatically do not." Vhannor locked his gaze on hers.

His icy eyes very suddenly filled with gold fire, and Liris struggled to breathe normally for an entirely different reason.

"In our line of work," he said, "physical combat skills can mean the difference between life and death. I wasn't willing to risk my attraction to you interfering."

Oh. Liris felt slightly giddy. "That's why inviting you to my bed is such a distressing idea."

"Distressing—" Vhannor closed his eyes, and when he opened them to Liris' perfectly innocent expression, rolled them. "Now you're just teasing me."

Liris' lips twitched. "Maybe a little. So, if you're not my teacher anymore, does that mean we can get dinner together? You pointed out that restaurant where courting university students frequent—" She broke off at the stunned look on his face and demanded in exasperation, "Are there more rules?!"

"Liris, we're going to have a professional relationship, and I'm a lot more experienced—"

"At being annoying," Liris muttered.

Vhannor paused. "Well. I am an older brother."

She glared.

More seriously, he continued, "There's a lot going on right now, and any... volatility in our professional relationship could affect that. We can't afford it."

A valid point, however—"Is there ever not a lot going on with you?"

Vhannor pursed his lips.

Liris nodded. "Is this why you're single, then? You never take risks?"

His eyes widened, his whole body tensing.

A palpable hit, then.

"Not with my duty," he said in a hard voice.

"Hmm." So if she decided she wanted to for sure be his partner romantically as well, she'd have to first prove she wouldn't be a liability in his ability to fulfill his duty.

Well, Liris could pass tests. And it wasn't like she wasn't planning on not being a liability in that regard anyway. Though if he then still didn't think she was enough... that would damage their relationship irreparably anyway.

"Well," she finally said, "as long as you're here, can you tell me what I'll need to prepare for our mission? I've never packed before."